Forget Me Not
by tuille
Summary: Rin was frozen, clutching the armrests of the wheelchair, "What?" Jaken gulped, looking away; he didn't deal well with crying females. "He wants to end the marriage," he repeated, almost in a whisper.
1. Chapter 1

chapter 1

by

tuille

disclaimer: i do not own inuyasha.

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Sesshomaru smirked as his eyes met his father's, nodding in his direction with a triumphant smile. He felt the strain of the past few weeks leave his body as he leant forward in his seat to sign the contract that laid on the conference table. <em>It had taken one month<em>, he thought, languidly scrawling his signature on the dotted line. _One long, grueling month of wining, dining, and wooing, but it had been worth it._ Finally, he had convinced the board members of Murasaki Co. and of course Mr. Murasaki himself, that YK Takahashi would be_ the_ firm to help them build the tallest and most luxurious set of apartment buildings to ever grace the skylines of Tokyo.

"It is a pleasure to do business with you Sesshomaru," Mr. Murasaki began, standing up from his chair as he moved to shake Sesshomaru's hand. "I see that you take after your father in both his tenacity and charm."

Sesshomaru chuckled at the compliment, rising to his feet, "Thank you Murasaki-sama."

"You should know," the older man leaned in, a twinkle in his eye, his tone hushed as to not have the other men hear. "You have only your wife to thank for this partnership."

Sesshomaru raised his brow, "Oh?" He thumbed his wedding band thoughtfully, _what have you done now Rin?_

"Indeed." Murasaki pulled back, resting his hand on the bamboo table, "Your wife is truly something else. A lovely young thing, isn't she? She came down to my office yesterday, demanding that I cancel all of my morning appointments so I could have a chat with her. Intrigued, I appeased her demands and we had a lovely meeting by ourselves. She said that since the proposal your company put forward weeks ago, she has not seen much of you. And, being pregnant, she needs you." He laughed as he remembered their conversation, "Your wife is utterly charming Sesshomaru, you should consider yourself lucky to have someone like her in your life."

Sesshomaru felt the corners of his mouth lift, "Thank you." It seemed that somehow Rin had managed to wrap one of Japan's most ruthless businessmen around her little finger. He gave a look over his shoulder to his father, shaking his head in disbelief, _only her. Only his Rin could pull off a feat so unimaginable. _

Mr. Murasaki smiled sagely, "Your Rin is truly unlike anyone I have met before in my life. If she were not already so wholly enamored with you, I would court her myself and make her wife number six."

And not only did Rin have him wrapped around her little finger, she managed to curve his womanizing habits. _Amazing. _Sesshomaru cleared his throat, "And do you think Rin would truly appreciate being wife number six?"

Mr. Murasaki laughed whole heartedly, thinking back to the girl, "No, perhaps not. But for a woman like her, I would ensure that there would not be a wife number seven. Does she have any sisters?" He continued eagerly, "Perhaps a widowed mother? Divorced Aunt?"

"Unfortunately no, but I'll be sure to pass along the compliment."

Murasaki nodded, "Be sure you do. Be sure you do. Take care of your wife Mr. Takahashi, she's someone you don't want to ever let go of." With a quick handshake he and the rest of his minions filed through the heavy oak doors, leaving Sesshomaru and his father in the boardroom.

Inutaisho laid a hand on Sesshomaru's shoulder, no longer able to contain his laughter. "Well," he beamed with delight, "It seems that once again, we are indebted to your wife."

Sesshomaru nodded, chuckling, "So it would seem." He picked up his phone from the desk, looking through the thirty-nine e-mails he had amassed in the almost four hour meeting. He glanced at his watch, noting the time. _6:30. _"Shall I be seeing you in two weeks?" he asked as he turned to his father, grabbing his leather briefcase.

Inutaisho nodded, "Yes. Perhaps even longer." He gathered his topcoat from his chair, folding it over his forearm. "It's been a while since we've been on vacation. With you in charge and the deal with Murasaki closing, it seems that now would be a most opportune time to take one."

"Izayoi will be pleased." Sesshomaru noted, holding the door open for his father as they exited the conference room.

Inutaisho smiled, "I should hope so." He took his car keys from his pocket, his amber eyes twinkling merrily, "Thank Rin for me won't you?"

Sesshomaru smirked, tucking one hand into his pocket. He thought briefly of all the ways he intended on showing his gratitude, "Of course."

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Rin stood in front of the full-length mirror, running her hands down the smooth silk. Her body was a jumble of nerves and anxiety. "What do you think?" she asked, her tone hushed as she turned to face Izayoi who sat on the edge of the leather settee.<p>

"My dear, you look stunning," Izayoi rose from the seat, inspecting the full-length gown from a different angle. The dress was perfect, a majestic purple silk, strapless, with a jewel-encrusted empire waist. "Absolutely stunning. You'll be the talk of the town."

Rin blushed, her cheeks tinging with rose, "Oh, no," she shook her head, _she didn't want that._

Izayoi laughed, her aged eyes crinkling, "Dear Rin, you must get used to having all eyes on you. That is part of the job ne?" she winked, "Besides, dressing up is one of the perks of being the wife of a Takahashi."

Rin laughed nervously, tugging on the dress, swallowing deeply. "Still, I really wish you two were coming tonight," she murmured, her voice muted by fear.

Izayoi's gaze softened, she knew how Rin felt. Being a wife to a Takahashi was certainly no walk in the park. Being a Takahashi meant being a constant figure in the public, with an overwhelming amount of pressure to look perfect, act perfect, _be_ perfect. It would drive anyone to the brink of insanity. "Rin," she started, brushing a loose curl behind her ear, "There is no need to be nervous. You will charm the socks off of every one of those stuffy bastards in their thousand dollar suits and make your husband proud. And when you tell the world that you two will be bringing a new-life into the world, well," she waggled her finger, "Just get ready for the belly rub requests that you will be bombarded with for the remaining six months of your pregnancy."

Rin giggled, giving the older woman a hug. "Thank you," she spoke sincerely, "For everything."

Izayoi smiled fondly, Rin was like the daughter she never had. "Now," she clapped her hands together, "There is one more thing missing from your outfit." She moved towards the large vanity, opening the lid of an antique jewelry box she had brought to the hotel. She lifted a gold chain from within, a diamond encrusted locket hanging on the end.

"Oh, Izayoi," Rin whispered as Izayoi lifted her hair and placed the locket around her neck, "It's so beautiful," she spoke softly, clutching the locket to her heart.

"Yes, it was my mother's," she stepped back from the younger woman and smiled. "She gave it to me when I was sixteen, three weeks before she passed away. She told me to give it to my daughter... a heirloom of sorts. And now, it's yours."

Rin's eyes fluttered open, "No! I couldn't."

"Nonsense," Izayoi waved her hands, "I choose to give it to you Rin. You should know by now that I consider you to be my daughter, a part of my family."

Rin's eyes began to water at the thought, _family, she finally had a family._" Thank you Izayoi-sama." She caressed the locket with her fingers, holding it delicately as if it were made of snow, "I'll treasure this forever."

"No more crying Rin," Izayoi reminded her softly, tears welling up in her own eyes. "You'll only ruin your make-up." She laughed, gently dabbing the corners of her eyes with her fingertips, "Kami only knows how long it took to get your eyes perfect."

Rin laughed, throwing her arms around Izayoi, "Thank you."

Izayoi hugged her back, "Of course."

"Oh boy, what have we got here?" Inutaisho asked as he walked into the bedroom, tucking his hands into his pockets. "Now why are my two favorite women crying?"

Rin sniffed and pulled away from the embrace first. "It's just the hormones," she explained with a giggle, wiping away her tears.

"Oh dear, I certainly remember this part from Izayoi's pregnancy," Inutaisho replied, taking his handkerchief from his pocket to wipe Rin's eyes. "And now comes the part that you request ramen, ice-cream, pickled orange juice and toilet paper for a light midnight snack."

Izayoi laughed, swatting her husband lightly on his arm, "Don't listen to him love, he's exaggerating." She wrapped her arm around his waist, "Besides, it was pickled _apple_ juice."

"Ah, yes, of course. I've a horrible memory." He joked, pressing a kiss onto Izayoi's temple. "Also Rin, speaking nothing of the sort, it would seem that I am once again indebted to you."

"Oh?" Izayoi's curiosity peeked, "What did you do now Rin?"

Rin blushed, "Nothing really," she waved her hand, playing it off.

"Nothing?" Inutaisho laughed, "She managed to wrap Murasaki-sama around her little finger! He's utterly in love with you, you know."

Izayoi raised a brow. Mr. Murasaki was known among their social circle for his infamous ways with women, "That womanizing pig?"

"Indeed." He held Rin's left hand, "He's even requested for her hand in marriage."

Rin laughed, "Oh, I'm sure Sesshomaru was pleased with that."

"He was actually quite delighted." Inutaisho smirked, jesting, "I don't know how you did it my dear. You must teach me the way of the Rin."

Rin paused thoughtfully, "Well," she began playfully, "I think you must first become a woman and wear a very revealing dress. Perhaps red, it seemed to do the trick."

Inutaisho raised a brow, "My dear, please tell me you are joking."

Rin giggled, "Of course Inutaisho-sama." She blushed, "I'm not exactly sure of what I said to him actually. Something along the lines of missing Sesshomaru and impending motherhood."

"Well, whatever you said to him worked. For that, you can expect large bouquets of roses to be delivered to your home at various hours of the day for the next month."

"Sending flowers to _my _wife father?" Sesshomaru asked, leaning against the doorframe. He had arrived at the hotel moments ago, going through the back doors to avoid the growing crowd lingering throughout the hotel lobby. When he had reached the suite he had only wanted to spend some alone time with his wife before the ball but nevertheless, fate had other plans.

"Well someone has to," retorted Inutaisho, smiling as Rin began to blush deeply at Sesshomaru's gaze. "We better get going, ne Izayoi? The plane won't wait for us forever."

"Yes, goodbye my dear," she brushed a kiss against Rin's warmed cheek, "Have fun tonight."

"Thank you," Rin murmured, "Have fun in paradise."

"Always," Inutaisho nodded his head at Sesshomaru, wrapping his hand around Izayoi's. "What do you think the chances are of that dress staying on?" he asked, whispering into his wife's ear.

Izayoi laughed, swatting her husband's arm. "Inutaisho," she chided, turning to the pair in front of her. "Goodbye you two. Have fun, and Sesshomaru darling," she patted his cheek affectionately, a gesture she wouldn't have dared years ago. "Don't allow your dear little wife to be mobbed by the hordes of greedy guses waiting for their next big paycheck."

Sesshomaru chuckled, "Of course Izayoi, enjoy your vacation," he kissed her cheek before shaking his father's hand.

Once they left the grand room and headed into the elevator, Izayoi leaned against her husband, thinking back to the look Sesshomaru had given Rin. "Two minutes," she told him, a sparkle in her eye, "Tops."

Inside the room Sesshomaru stood, gazing at his small wife. "You look beautiful," he told her as he walked closer, cupping her chin with his fingers, tilting her head upwards. Her cheeks were flame-red, her eyes refusing to meet his gaze.

"Rin," he murmured, his tone strict yet soft, "Look at me when I speak to you."

"Sorry," she briefly peeked up her chocolate orbs to catch his amber ones, only to settle her gaze on his tie.

Sesshomaru laughed, slowly, fondly. They had been married for nearly ten months, together for more than a year before then and yet, she blushed as deeply and as easily as the day they had first met. _Adorable, _he thought, catching her soft lips with his.

Rin was hesitant at first, worries of wrinkling his suit fluttering through her mind. Yet, those lips were so strong, so hungry, so sinfully delicious. They were impossible to resist. Rin whimpered, her knees buckling as his lips were remained against hers, plying her to submit to her desire. In a matter of seconds she moaned into the embrace, wrapping her arms around his neck. Sesshomaru smirked as he lifted her small body off the floor, her lithe legs, impossibly long for someone so small, wrapping around his waist. "Sesshomaru," she whispered, eskimo kissing his nose with hers, "I've missed you."

Sesshomaru smiled, "As I've missed you." He laid her onto the bed, looking at her hungrily, running his hand down her soft curves. _I want her, _he thought, his hand already finding the zipper to her dress. He cursed as he briefly caught sight of his watch, _seven o'clock. Damn it to hell. The event was set to start for 7:30._ _It was at times like this that he cursed his self-control. _He fisted the silk sheets beneath them, "As much as it pains me to say," he whispered hoarsely, "We have a ball to attend in a half-an-hour."

Rin pouted, her lips swollen, her cheeks flush with desire. "It would only take ten minutes," she suggested, moving onto her elbows to nuzzle his cheek. Her small, delicate hands played with his jaw, "Please?"

Sesshomaru laughed, running his fingers through her midnight tresses, "Rin, _it_, would take longer than ten minutes with what I had in mind."

"Oh," she blushed deeply, her interest piqued. She looked up at him beneath long lashes, "Really?"

"Really," Sesshomaru brushed his lips against once more, "For you see, my wife has once again charmed my clients into signing their contracts."

Rin giggled, lying on her back, enjoying his ministrations. She played along, feigning innocence, "Oh really?"

"Really." Sesshomaru moved down to kiss her collarbone, "For that, I am but indebted to please her like a queen."

She blinked, thinking to the last time when she had inadvertently helped to convince the president of Shoji Enterprises to sign a two-year contract. "Ah," she blushed, "That would take much longer than ten minutes."

Sesshomaru smirked, kissing her on the forehead before he rose from the bed. "I'm going to take a shower," he told her, unknotting his tie and removing off his suit jacket, setting it next to her on the bed. He glanced back at Rin, her long dark-chocolate hair creating a halo as she laid against the white silk. Internally he groaned, _a very cold shower._

"Ok," Rin smiled as she sat up and grabbed his suit jacket, his scent almost overwhelming. _A__n intoxicating, masculine mixture of bergamot, cedar, white ginger, white pepper, cedar wood and tonka beans. That was Sesshomaru's scent._ Rin grinned, pulling the jacket over herself. She would have to remember to buy him another bottle of his cologne, _the smell alone was intoxicating._

In the shower Sesshomaru cursed himself once more. _Why had he turned her down?_ He sighed, frustrated with the lack of _alone time_ he had with Rin. _Nine days, _he thought bitterly, cranking the dial to cold, _it had been nine days since he had her. _The water felt like ice, the numbness almost unbearable. He growled, agitated as he grabbed the shampoo bottle from the side.

_How he missed her. _

When he finished showering he looked out the bathroom door to the bedroom. Rin had curled up on the centre of the large bed, using his jacket as a blanket. _Beautiful_, he thought, resisting the urge to gather her in his arms and ravish her. He curled his hands up into fists in an attempt to prevent himself from touching her. _She looked so small, so delicate._ He gave a resounding sigh, admiring her form. His navy suit jacket covered most of her body, only her head peaked out as she lay against her cheek. She was daydreaming, her eyes glazed, her painted lips parted as she traced figures onto the bed sheets.

_So goddamn beautiful. _

He had waited long enough. It was decided then, his self-control be damned, he missed his wife.

"Cold?" Sesshomaru asked, his baritone low and seductive. He strode back into the room, wearing nothing but a towel that hung dangerously low.

Rin sat up in surprise, blushing, _again_. "Um," her voice broke, "Yes," she averted her gaze from his half-naked form, her cheeks flaming red. _He's so handsome. __  
><em>

"Rin." His silky baritone voice came from behind her, "Look at me."

Rin turned to face him hesitantly, swallowing at the delectable sight in front of her. _A god, _she thought, his beauty was otherworldly. Sesshomaru smirked when he caught her gaze, letting the towel drop to the pashmina floor. Rin's eyes widened as he did, looking down immediately to her hands.

"You're so red," Sesshomaru remarked teasingly, walking over to cup her face, "Perhaps you're becoming ill?" he mused, pressing soft kisses onto her flushed visage. _So soft,_ he thought, running his hands over her frame,_ so perfect._

Rin whined in restrained pleasure, "Maybe," she replied, arching her back in delight.

Sesshomaru smirked, maneuvering her to lie down onto the king-sized bed, him on top of her, resting on his forearm to leave a small amount of space between them.

"You smell nice," she told him, cuddling in the crook of his neck, "New soap?"

Sesshomaru chuckled, kissing her collarbone, "I'm unsure of what it is."

"That's a shame," Rin reached up and caught his face in her two dainty hands, brushing his bangs to the side. "Hello," she greeted gently, running her fingers across his lips.

Sesshomaru raised an elegantly arched brow, "Hello," he replied, moving down her petite frame, until his cheek lay against the growing bump. "Hello," he repeated, whispering to their child in a hushed tone, kissing her belly. Rin giggled, leaning up onto her elbows. Her eyes began to mist as she watched the tender moment of Sesshomaru and their future child, her breath taken away when he smiled up at her. He rubbed her belly affectionately, making his way back up to kiss her lips.

She tilted her head to the side, "Sesshomaru," she requested, all but in a breathy whisper, "Make love to me," she pleaded, her eyes catching his. She ached for his touch, his kisses. Sesshomaru groaned, _ball be damned, _leaning his head down to take her lips, hungrily, his long silver hair forming a curtain around them. Almost viciously Rin gripped his toned arms, running her hands all over the length of his form. Sesshomaru grunted in response, caressing her soft skin, placing sweet kisses along her body.

"Rin," he whispered harshly, gripping her soft waist. She was intoxicating; his weakness, his drug.

"Sesshomaru-sama!" The squawky voice came muffled behind the doors to the master ensuite, irking him to no end.

Sesshomaru cursed as he tore his lips from Rin, "Jaken," he hissed. He cursed his assistant and his horrible timing.

"Sesshomaru-sama! Sir! The ball has already begun! Everyone is asking for you two!"

"We're coming," he growled out, furious for the ruined moment.

"But sir- the guests!"

"Leave _now_ Jaken." He made a fist in Rin's hair, resisting all urges to murder his assistant.

"Uh, yes sir! So sorry sir." Jaken quaked with fear, bowing furiously to the doors, "I'll be down with the guests sir."

Sesshomaru closed his eyes tight, taking a moment to calm himself. _I should have fired him years ago, _he thought bitterly, relishing in the soft, soothing touches of Rin's hands. Finally collecting himself he sighed, kissing her forehead before getting up from the bed. He walked towards the closet, taking the tuxedo off the hanger.

Rin giggled, oh how the thought of getting caught in the act by Jaken amused her. She shook her head, bouncing up from the bed to comb her hair in front of the vanity. _Tonight then, _she thought, watching Sesshomaru dress through the corner of her eye.

Sesshomaru kissed her neck when he had finished, "Tonight," he whispered, admiring her beauty through the reflection, "We will finish what _you _started."

Rin bit her lip, nodding her head in agreement. She turned in her seat to face him, smiling as she noted his complete outfit. He wore a black Armani suit, which had been tailored to perfection. _Always so handsome, _she mused, wondering if he knew how much it affected her when he wore his suits_._

Sesshomaru leant down, fingering the locket resting at her breasts, "Is this new?"

She nodded, grinning as she told him, "Hai, Izayoi gave it to me. It was her mother's."

"Hn," he set the locket down, kissing Rin's lips briefly before he grabbed a tie. He handed it to her as she leapt up from her seat, leaning up onto her tiptoes to tie it for him.

"There," she told him, knotting it perfectly; a task she had honed during their relationship. "Dashing as always," she smiled, leaning up, kissing his chin.

"As you are always beautiful," Sesshomaru stepped back and offered his arm, "Shall we, milady?" He asked, kissing her hand.

She laughed, "Well of course, kind sir," she replied playfully in a Southern drawl, linking her arm through his. She laid her head to rest against his arm, "I love you, you know," she told him as they walked out of the bedroom and into the luxurious sitting room.

Sesshomaru raised a brow, "No," he feigned surprise, "I didn't know."

Rin giggled, how she loved this playful, sarcastic side of him; a side that only those close enough to him knew of. She elbowed him lightly with their linked arms, "Well now you do," she retorted.

"Violence my dear," he replied smoothly, sending shivers down her spine as he looked over at her, "Is never the answer."

Rin stuck out her tongue in reply, jutting out her chin. She squealed as she took a step forward, tripping over what seemed to be a very expensive leather, Italian loafer. "Sesshomaru!"

He smirked as he caught her, his arm wrapped around her waist as he brought her closer, "Do you think I would have let you fall?" he asked, his face mere centimeters away from hers.

She shook her head, "No," her breath hitched as she starred back into amber orbs. She moaned when he took her lips, fisting his lapels in her hands. "Maru," she whimpered when he pulled away, settling her back onto her own two feet. With a delighted smile she leaned forward, nuzzling into his chest. She relished being in his arms, "I trust you."

Sesshomaru was silent for a moment, before placing a kiss on the crown of her head, "Good." He released his hold on her, taking her hand as they walked to the double doors of their master ensuite. He held open the door to the hotel room, letting her pass through before closing it with the back of his foot. Together they waited for the elevator, where he pressed the down button to the first floor; the ball.

"I'm kind of nervous," Rin murmured, trembling with nerves, gripping his hand tightly in her tiny grasp. She was finding it harder to breathe, thousands of scenarios running through her mind, all ending horribly, horribly wrong.

"No need to be," he reminded her, comforting her with his kind, reassuring words. He turned to face her, brushing his lips against her forehead, "The whole room is already enamored with you Rin."

She blushed, letting out a deep breath, "Ok."

The elevator dinged, announcing their arrival to the first floor, "Ready?" Sesshomaru asked, his hand holding the elevator doors open.

"As I'll ever be," Rin murmured in reply. Sesshomaru looked down at her; she was more than a foot shorter than he. _Adorably his. _He took her left hand in his, lifting it to his lips, pressing a kiss on her ring finger. It was adorned with a platinum wedding band and canary yellow diamond engagement ring. The stone was rare, with an almost impossible beauty, _like his Rin._

Rin smiled at his gesture, her heart fluttering with delight, "Aishiteru."

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Sesshomaru stood up at the head table, clapping his fork against the champagne glass. Immediately a hush fell upon the crowd, all eyes on Sesshomaru for his speech.<p>

"Thank you all for coming today. Some of you may be curious as to what this ball is for, others are here simply for the free champagne and caviar." Sesshomaru paused as the crowd laughed at that part, "But tonight, is a momentous night," he held his hand to Rin who took it and stood up with him, "Tonight, is the night that my wife Rin and I, share with you, our friends and colleagues, esteemed guests and family, that we are pregnant."

Instantly the crowd erupted in cheers, standing up from their seats to congratulate the couple. Rin beamed to her husband as the DA, a cankerous old man who seemed to take a liking to the bubbly, optimistic woman, pulled her to the dance floor.

_Truly remarkable, _Sesshomaru thought, taking another sip of his champagne. He smirked as he saw her being dipped back then twirled around the room. It seemed he was being showed up. He excused himself from his colleagues to steal her away, handing his empty glass to Jaken. The DA smiled when he caught Sesshomaru's eye, stepping back from Rin.

"Sesshomaru-sama," he began, patting his back, "Don't let this one go."

Sesshomaru looked into Rin's eyes, "I don't intend to. Have a good night Tienshin." The talking, the laughter, the music, the lights seemed to fade into the background the moment he held her in his arms. He leaned into her touch, her floral scent wafting through his senses. He tightened his hold on her, refusing to let her go. _Mine._

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Hours later Rin nearly ran to the car-lot, high-heeled shoes in her hand. She was glad to have finally escaped the almost endless stream of congratulatory messages and as Izayoi predicted, belly rubs. Rin giggled at the thought, though the night had been lovely, it had been long. She was certain her feet had blisters now, courtesy of the four-inch stilettos, the sides of her mouth sore from the constant smiling.<p>

Sesshomaru easily caught up with his wife, his stride matching two of hers. He was always the gentleman, opening the passenger side door for her. "Thank you love-bug," she teased, kissing him lightly on the lips before hopping into the black SUV.

"My pleasure," he replied, shrugging off his jacket to place on top of Rin's almost elfin form. He kissed her once more, slowly, savoring the taste; _nectarines, and honeysuckle._ Reluctantly he pulled away, moving to shut her door. He climbed into the driver's side of the SUV, adjusting the rear view mirror.

Rin smiled, snuggling into the leather seat, "We did it!" She exclaimed, pumping her fist high in the air. The night had been a success, with media coverage from only the most prominent of newspapers, and magazines, as well as a guest list of 300, all of who attended.

"So we did." He started up the vehicle, the Mercedes purring with delight as the engine revved. "And no casualties."

Rin laughed, "No casualties. Though, I think my belly's going to be sore tomorrow morning from all the rubbing."

Sesshomaru chuckled, placing his hand on top of her stomach, _on top of their child. _"A boy or girl?"

Rin pondered, "Oh, a girl!" She looked over at him, placing her tiny hands over the one on her growing belly, "What do you think?"

"A boy," Sesshomaru replied confidently as he pulled out of the hotel and onto the freeway, "Perhaps even twins."

Rin peeled out in laughter, "Twins?" The sound was magic to his senses. "No way!"

"Hn," He gave her a pointed look, "You should have more faith in your husband's predictions."

Rin sobered up, "Alright mister," she wagged her finger in front of him, "When we get those test result back tomorrow and they're twins, I'll..."

Sesshomaru nodded along to Rin's ramble, keeping his eyes trained on the road. He frowned as he noted a green car speeding down the opposite lane, with several transport trucks that had become a blockade in front of it. The driver of the car was intentionally going over the speed limit; he suspected at least 50 over. He cursed as the idiotic driver tried to pass all three transport trucks at once, leaving the green car in Sesshomaru's lane. If the green car didn't change back soon, they would surely crash.

"Fuck!" Sesshomaru slammed the breaks; the other driver however did not and stayed in the lane. The last thing Rin remembered as they were thrown backwards was Sesshomaru's hand gripping hers tightly and then, everything went black.

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>xoxo<p>

tuille


	2. Chapter 2

chapter 2

by

tuille

disclaimer: not mine.

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>"Rin?" A soft voice hovered over a ragged body, "Sweetie," she pleaded, "Can you hear me?"<p>

Rin's eyes opened slowly; she felt groggy, her wrists were sore, her throat was dry. "Ayame?" Her voice was scratchy, her lips dry.

"Oh, thank god," Ayame pulled the chair closer, clinging to her friend's hand.

Rin's vision was slowly coming back; the brightness of the room blinding her. She took in the pale blue walls, the IV pole, the whirring of one of the machines beside her bed and the steady beeping from her heart monitor. "I'm, I'm in the hospital?"

Ayame nodded, "Yeah." She swallowed deeply, "Do you need anything? Water?"

Rin nodded, "How'd I..." she shook her head, trying to remember, "What... what happened?"

Ayame plucked a bottle of water from her purse, uncapping it before giving it to Rin, "You were in a car accident."

"How... what? Sesshomaru? Where's Sesshomaru?" Rin sat up, panicking, "The baby? Is the baby ok?"

"I..." Ayame cast a glance to the floor, hesitating, "Sesshomaru is," she chose her words carefully, not wanting to alarm her friend, "Alive."

"And the baby?" Rin asked, her voice hysteric, placing a hand onto her stomach, "Is it ok?" She looked to her friend who refused to meet her gaze. Her heart sank to the bottom of her stomach, "Ayame?" she asked, her voice cracking, imagining the worse.

"Oh Rin," Ayame pulled her into a hug, "I'm sorry," she murmured, "I'm so sorry."

Rin was frozen, tears welling up in her eyes, "I lost the baby?" she asked, voice strained.

Ayame nodded, wiping back her own tears, "I'm sorry sweetie."

Floodgates were open and Rin threw her arms back around Ayame, "No," she whispered between sobs, her heart was breaking.

Ayame attempted to soothe her, rubbing her back in circles. Neither of them noticed the door open, nor the man who walked in, his white shirt stained with his wife's tears, his midnight hair tied into a low ponytail. He placed his hand on top of his wife's shoulder, smiling, as she looked his way.

"Kouga?" Rin sniffed, pulling away from Ayame's embrace.

"Hey munchkin," he greeted gruffly, sitting on the edge of her bed. He leaned towards the nightstand, grabbing a box of that scratchy, cheap tissue, to which he offered her.

"Thanks," Rin mumbled, crumpling the used tissue in her hand. _Damn, _she thought, viciously wiping away the tears that continued to fall, _I didn't know you could actually feel your heart break. _

"Sesshomaru's alright." Kouga told her, patting her back affectionately in an attempt to comfort her, "He still hasn't come out of his coma yet."

"He's in a coma?" Rin's voice cracked. Immediately she looked down, her hands itching to pull out the IV and run to his room.

"Induced," Kouga sighed, running his hand through his hair, "The doctors believed that it was the best option to protect his brain during his surgeries."

Rin gulped, she looked herself over; a few cuts and bruises, nothing major, _nothing that required surgery._ "Can I... can I see him?"

"I can go and ask," Kouga pressed a kiss on top of Ayame's forehead before leaving the room.

Rin was silent, her brain trying to process what she had just learned. _I lost my baby, my husband's in a coma, _she tried to blink back the tears but they continued to fall.

"It's alright Rin," Ayame shifted onto the bed, "You can cry."

"I," Rin was struggling not to, trying to think optimistically, but it was so hard, so hard. Millions of scenarios flooded her mind, and she was finding it harder and harder to focus on the positive. "I..."

"Shhhh," Ayame pulled her close once again.

"I can't lose him too," her voice cracked and hugged Ayame tighter, "I can't." She broke down, clutching her friend closely, because irrationally, she thought, if she didn't, she'd lose her too.

"You won't," Ayame murmured, assuring her of a full recovery, "Remember Rin, he's Sesshomaru Takahashi; Japan's top businessman under 40. He's too god damn busy to die."

Rin let out a bitter laugh, her eyes cast onto the linoleum floor. Ayame pushed back Rin's limp hair out of her face, "You still have me and Kouga, you know that right?"

Rin nodded, "I know." They were always there for her. Before she had met Sesshomaru, Ayame had been the closest thing she had to a family. "How..." she almost didn't dare to ask, "How bad is he?"

Ayame bit her lip, remembering the first time she had seen him since the accident, "He could be a lot worse. He took most of the impact so..."

Rin squeezed her eyes shut, refusing to imagine it; _the lights, the blaring sound of horns, the pain, the blood, _it was all coming back. "Can I, can I have a moment alone?"

Ayame looked at her dearest friend, wanting to fix everything back to the way it was. This was truly a nightmare; just last week they had gone out to dinner, all four of them, and had the grandest time, and now... now her heart ached for Rin. "Sure. I'll be just outside ok?"

"Ok." Rin grabbed a hold of her pillow, blinking back the tears, forcing a smile as Ayame stood up from her seat.

Ayame picked up her purse and left the room, "I'll be back in a few," she murmured, closing the door gently behind her. She sat down onto the blue plastic bench, her own heart broken at her closet friend's tragedy. She let out a ragged breath, trying not to tear up herself.

"How's she holding up?" Kouga asked minutes later, sitting down next to his wife.

"Kouga," Ayame whimpered, wrapping herself in his arms, "I've never seen her so... broken."

Kouga sighed, stroking her hair, "She's strong."

"She's been through so much." Ayame looked to the closed door, "Too much."

"I know baby," he held her closer, kissing the crown of her head, "I talked to the nurse."

Ayame's emerald orbs peeked up, "Yeah?"

"Yeah," he sighed, resting his head on hers, "she can see him."

"Good," she stood up from the bench, "I'll go tell her."

"Ok, I'll be with Sesshomaru." Kouga stood as well, brushing a kiss on her forehead.

"Ok," she pulled him closer, kissing him tenderly on the lips, caressing his unshaven cheek. He had stayed at the hospital with her for the past two days, never once suggesting that they go home and rest. "I love you."

"Love you too."

Ayame knocked on the door, opening it slowly to see Rin clutching her pillow, her sobs echoing out to the hall.

"Oh Rin," Ayame closed the door, taking a seat and stroked her ebony locks.

"I," Rin hiccupped, her crying subsiding, "I just want Sesshomaru."

"I know sweetie and you're in luck. The nurse is going to come over in ten minutes to take you to see him."

"Really?" Rin sniffed, blowing her nose in a tissue. "I can see him?"

Ayame nodded, "Who knows," she smiled encouragingly, "maybe he'll wake up for you."

Rin cracked a silly grin, "Oh, he better."

Ayame hugged Rin, _that's my girl, _"I hope so."

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Rin looked nervously upon the wooden doors, waiting for Ayame to open it as she was forced into the wheelchair being pushed by the matronly nurse.<p>

"Ready?" Asked Ayame, toying with the door handle.

Rin nodded, she just wanted to see him. To see for herself that he was still alive. "Yeah," her voice was soft, barely audible.

"Ok then," Ayame opened the door, revealing Sesshomaru. His head was bandaged, blood seeping through. His left arm was in a sling, his face scratched and bruised.

"Shomaru," Rin was wheeled next to his bed, which had been lowered to accommodate her. Tentatively she touched his cheek, swallowing deeply as she traced a cut that traveled the length of his cheekbone.

"We'll leave you two to your own devices. I'll be back tomorrow morning ok?" Ayame murmured, grasping Kouga's hand in hers they left the room, heading home for the first time in forty-eight hours.

The nurse smiled at Rin, handing her a box of tissues, "Just in case. I'll be back to take you back to your room when my shift's over."

"Thanks."

"Of course," and with that she left, closing the door behind her, leaving Rin alone with Sesshomaru.

Rin hesitated before lifting herself up from the chair and up onto his hospital bed. She lay on her side, the tears flowing down. "Hi," she murmured, not knowing what to say. She swallowed nervously, caressing his unshaven face. "I... the baby, I lost it in the accident." Rin whimpered and buried herself in his shoulder, "Maru, I can't lose you too." She stayed like that for what felt like hours before she composed herself, stretching down to reach for the box of Kleenex.

Rin sniffed, using the tissues to wipe away the tears. "I'm getting your bed all wet." She let out a little laugh, "and your dress," with a soft smile she reached for his hand, playing with his fingers.

She paused, moving his right arm so it went around her and she snuggled into his side. She moved her left hand to clasp his right one, waiting for something to happen. So she squeezed his hand and waited. _Nothing, of course._ Rin sighed, the tears threatening to fall again.

"I love you," she told him, "I love you lots like jelly tots." _Nothing. _God, it felt like a steak knife was twisting around her heart. "If you wake up," Rin shook her head, _positive thinking, _"When you wake up, we're going to go for a second honeymoon ok? Just you and me and some palm trees. Sounds nice right?" She looked up at him expectantly; _nothing. _"And, and we'll scuba dive and I'll try oysters this time. And I won't, I won't," Rin wept once more, "I love you." Her voice was scratchy, wavering. She closed her eyes, exhausted. _One more time, _she squeezed his hand; _it's me, Rin. _She waited, hoping, praying, _nothing. "_Aishiteru," she whispered, accepting defeat. She clutched his hand to her heart, holding back the urge to cry, letting the pure exhaustion take over. And so she slept, unknowing that if she had waited another three minutes, she would have felt his hand squeeze back.

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Sesshomaru woke up the next morning, his head pounding, his limbs heavy, pain coursing through every part of his body. He opened his eyes, the whirring sounds surrounding him pounded through him like a ton of bricks. He gripped his head, confused, in pain. He cursed as the sun blinded his eyes; the curtains were open. He narrowed his eyes; they were a tacky baby blue, not what he had in his penthouse. Beside him, an alarm began to go off, beeping every couple of seconds. He hissed, covering his ears. What the hell was going on and where the hell was he? He took in the entirety of the room, coming to a conclusion. <em>The hospital. Why was he here?<em>

"So sleeping beauty finally wakes up," Inuyasha strolled into his field of view, a long white coat on his form, a stethoscope tossed carelessly around his neck.

"Inuyasha," Sesshomaru rolled his eyes, _of course Inuyasha would be a part of the reason for why he would be in a hospital_. He spat out, "What did you do to me?" His voice was vicious, suspicious.

Inuyasha frowned, "Calm down," he started, "you're going to get yourself worked up." He sauntered over to the end of his bed and checked the charts, "Well your vitals are fine."

"You're my doctor?" Sesshomaru sneered, "I'm surprised you were even accepted to residency here."

"Residency?" Inuyasha frowned; it had been a year since he had graduated. "And no, I'm not your doctor. I'm your brother, who just happens to be a doctor." Inuyasha grinned, "Fully fledged might I add."

"Half-brother." Sesshomaru was quick to define their relationship.

Inuyasha's brows knitted together, he hadn't heard Sesshomaru use that term for a quite a while. It seemed almost, foreign. "Right... half-brother," he muttered softly.

Sesshomaru growled, frustrated, "Can I leave now? I don't have time for this... family gathering. I believe that I have a meeting at four with the board members of _my _company," he told him, ripping out the IV in his wrist, ignoring the stream of blood that now ran down his arm.

"You idiot!" Inuyasha exclaimed, taking the IV pole away, searching through the drawers for a cotton swab. He took Sesshomaru's hand, dabbing the blood away before placing a band-aid on it.

"Patching me up now are we?" Sesshomaru questioned, a look of disdain clearly etched onto his face.

Inuyasha growled, "What the fuck is your problem?"

"My problem?" Sesshomaru nearly laughed at the absurdity of this entire situation, "I just woke up from a horrendous dream to your _lovely_ face. Now, if you'll excuse me," he sat up from the bed, pushing Inuyasha out of his way. He attempted to walk to the door but collapsed midway.

Inuyasha snorted, "So Mr. Hotshot, guess your motor skills aren't in check." He helped him up and put him back in to the bed.

Sesshomaru snarled, pushing his hands away, hoisting himself back onto the bed, "Why am I here?"

Inuyasha looked away, hesitating, "You were in a car accident."

"Great." Sesshomaru leaned back in the bed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Have Jaken send in the contracts, I'll need to postpone the meeting and I need to get a hold of grandfather to run over the specifics of the new apartment complex on Hill St."

Inuyasha was silent, confused by what he was saying, "Our grandfather passed away three years ago."

Sesshomaru looked at Inuyasha, incredulous, "What?"

"He died," Inuyasha began, speaking slowly, ideas formulating in his mind, "Of a stroke."

Sesshomaru frowned, confused, "He... what?"

Inuyasha walked closer, flashing a light in his eye, "What year is it?"

Sesshomaru hissed, dodging the light, "2008."

"What day is it?"

"May 31st. Tuesday."

"And how old are you?"

"28."

Inuyasha gave him an odd look, "Are you single?"

"Inuyasha, I don't have times for your petty games. Unlike you, I have real work to do."

Inuyasha growled, "Just answer the fucking question."

Sesshomaru scoffed, rolling his eyes at Inuyasha's usage of such vulgar language, "Yes, I am single." He looked to the window, seeing only grey sky, "I recently ended my engagement to Kagura."

Inuyasha nodded, scribbling something down into his notepad, "Be back in a second."

Sesshomaru rolled his eyes; he could care less whether or not he had to see him again. He sighed, touching his left arm that was placed in a sling. _A car accident. Why is it that I don't remember anything? His grandfather's death. Surely he would have remembered that. _

Minutes later Inuyasha walked back in with another doctor. "Hello Mr. Takahashi, I am your physician for the remainder of your stay at Tokyo General, Dr. Yamamoto. Now, I'm here to tell you of your current... situation."

"Yes, I have a broken arm, a bandaged head and a splitting headache. Anything else?" His tone was sarcastic; he did not want to deal with another idiotic doctor.

"Actually, yes. You see, you suffered extensive trauma to your brain from the accident, which resulted in retrograde amnesia. Essentially, your entire memory of the previous three years has been erased. It may come back with time, though it's not for certain."

"Memory loss, right." He shifted his gaze to Inuyasha, "Inuyasha, this stunt you are pulling isn't as facetious as you may believe. I, unlike you, have a lot of _important _work to get done so if you could please have Jaken send in my files, that would be _most_ helpful." His tone was patronizing, eyes glaring at the pair in front of him.

Inuyasha gave him a look before he handed him the newspaper, "It's 2011. You're 31. You're married and you've been married for about a year."

Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed, grabbing the newspaper from Inuyasha's clutches. He flipped through to the society page, which featured a large black and white photo of him and some woman dancing together.

"Who is this?" he snarled, pointing to the woman in his arms.

"Your wife," Inuyasha told him, his eyes leveled to his gaze, "Rin."

_Rin... _"I've never met her. Nor have I heard of her. So the assumption that I would marry a nobody is positively absurd."

Inuyasha growled, clutching his hands onto the bedrail, "She's not a fucking nobody. She's your wife. W-I-F-E. She's probably the best wife anyone could ask for and she choose you. She's funny and witty and optimistic and so charmingly naive that you, Mr. Heart of Ice, self-proclaimed asshole of the year, fell head over heels for her."

Sesshomaru smirked, processing Inuyasha's spiel, "It seems that you have feelings for my _wife_."

Inuyasha snorted, folding his arms, "Keh. I have my own woman thanks."

"Oh yes," Sesshomaru looked up from the newspaper and smirked, "Kikyo, wasn't she cheating on you?"

A flash of hurt came from Inuyasha's eyes before being replaced with rage. His hands came together in fists, ready to pulverize Sesshomaru into the ground. "You are a fucking asshole," he spat out, anger seething through his veins, "And if you weren't already in the hospital I'd, I'd..." Inuyasha shook his head, leaving the room, slamming the door. Outside the room he laid his head against the cool wall, needing to calm himself down from that ordeal. It was odd, wasn't it just two week that they had gotten drinks together after work? _Brothers. _Rin had done that, changing their relationship for the better.

"Fuck," he rubbed his face, agitated; Rin lost the baby, Sesshomaru lost his memory. He prayed to Kami that it would all work out in the end.

Back inside, the doctor stood, paralyzed by Sesshomaru's icy glare. "Uh...I will get your assistant in here as soon as possible Mr. Takahashi."

"Hn," Sesshomaru dismissed him with a wave of hand. He returned his attention back to the paper, reading the caption underneath the photo. _'Mr. and Mrs. Takahashi looking the picture of elegance at the Blue Ball. Noticing the glow on the Mrs? At the ball, Sesshomaru Takahashi announced that he and his wife, Rin Takahashi, are pregnant. Congratulations to the happy couple!' _

Sesshomaru took in a sharp intake of breath, _pregnant?_ A knock on his door announced the arrival of his assistant Jaken, a short bald man with a green complexion, dressed in a tweed suit.

"Jaken," Sesshomaru set down the paper onto his lap, "Do you have files for me to go over?"

"Yes sir," Jaken waddled over, handing over a leather briefcase and his cell phone.

"What is this?" Sesshomaru asked, playing with the device.

"Your cell phone sir."

Sesshomaru frowned, remembering the article in the newspaper, "Interesting. Tell me Jaken, where is my... wife?" If she were truly his wife, why was she not at his side then?

Jaken opened the briefcase for Sesshomaru, pulling out numerous contracts for him to look over, "In the north wing of the hospital sir."

Sesshomaru arched a brow, "She was in the car?"

"Yes sir."

"And this car accident, how did it happen?"

"Well," Jaken swallowed, nervous, playing with his tie, "You were heading home from the ball and on the highway there was a drunk driver who decided it was a great idea to pass three transport trucks at the same time and then... you crashed into him."

Sesshomaru was silent, urging Jaken to continue. "So one of the truck drivers called the ambulance and you and Rin were sent to the hospital. You took the brunt of the accident, sir, purposely maneuvering the car so Rin would be safe. That was most brave of you sir. Most brave."

Sesshomaru leant back against the stiff pillows, "So she is fine?"

"I... Rin... she lost the baby." Jaken cast his gaze to the floor, unsure what more to say.

"She _lost_ the baby?" He repeated those words mechanically, his eyes settled on her belly in the photo.

Jaken exhaled sharply, "Yes sir."

_Good. _He ignored the sharp pull in his chest, "Very well." Sesshomaru focused his attention to the contracts in front of him, pushing all thoughts of that, that _girl_, out of his mind, "Have Kouga file papers for an annulment immediately."

Jaken squawked, flailing his arms, "What! Sir!"

"An annulment Jaken," his voice was dry as he eyed his balding assistant, "Has three years aged you so?"

"But sir," Jaken looked to his boss, pleading, "Ms. Rin is most capable of being your wife! Everyone in the office loves her! She,"

Sesshomaru glared, interrupting his spiel, "Who are you Jaken, to have a say in my _personal_ endeavors?" His tone was harsh and scathing.

"I," Jaken gulped, put in place, looking down upon the white floor. "Yes sir." He spoke obediently, "On what grounds sir?" He didn't dare to know. He looked up at his boss, awaiting his response. _Poor Ms. Rin._

Sesshomaru took a second, fingering the newspaper. His eye caught Rin's in the photo, taking all of her in; her hair was swept up in a whimsical chiffon, her silky dress hugging her petite waist, her lips were too soft, her stature much too short, her expression too happy, she looked... He gripped his fist, "Kouga is a capable attorney, he can choose the best reason but in this man's opinion, fraudulence."

Jaken's hands began to shake, "Yes sir." He quickly left the room, leaning against the wooden doors to catch his breath. He shook his head; this had to be a horrible nightmare. Had to be. He turned to his left, ready to leave only to find Rin begin wheeled up to visit Sesshomaru.

"Ms. Rin!" He rushed over, unknowing how to tell her the news.

"Jaken!" Rin beamed and pulled the older man for a hug, "I heard Sesshomaru woke up!"

"Yes, yes he did. Are you going in?" Jaken needed to stall, he couldn't tell Rin, he just couldn't.

"Of course!"

"Did," He had to think on the spot, wanting to prolong the inevitable, " Did you get the flowers the office sent?"

Rin laughed, "I did. Please thank everyone for me."

"Of course, of course." He shifted left and right, "You know, we sent the pool out two days ago and the response was so overwhelming that we bought three of the largest bouquets."

Rin giggled, "I'll be sure to make some cookies and bring them in when I get better."

"Yes, yes, everyone would love that," he eyed the large doors, hesitating.

"Um, I better head in then," she said with a polite smile, "Would you like to come with me?"

"Uh, no, I..." He stuttered, "Perhaps, perhaps you shouldn't, go in."

Rin paused, cocking her head to the left, "Why?"

"I," he looked to the nurse, "May I have a moment in private with her please?"

The nurse nodded, leaving the pair in the empty hallway.

"What's wrong Jaken?" Rin's lips quivered, suspecting the worse. _He's gone too? I didn't get to say goodbye? _

"He..." Jaken adverted his gaze; he didn't dare to look into those doe eyes when he told her, "Sesshomaru-sama... he doesn't want to see you."

Rin was frozen, clutching on the armrests of the wheelchair, "What?"

Jaken gulped, he didn't deal well with crying females, "He wants to end the marriage," he murmured, almost in a whisper. He didn't want to believe it himself, Ms. Rin was the best thing to happen to Sesshomaru.

Rin sat, paralyzed in her seat. She hung her head, defeated. The tears were falling freely; she had never felt so alone in her life. She looked up to Jaken, who refused to meet her gaze. She looked to the door, her chest constricting, her mind swirling with emotion. She was so close, yet so far away. _Sesshomaru? _She felt her heart slowly breaking into two, _why?_

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p><em>xo <em>

_tuille_


	3. Chapter 3

chapter 3

by

tuille

disclaimer: not mine.

Just a quick thanks to my anonymous reviewers: Seras, Blue, Hattaru, jane66, and VanillaRain! Hopefully, I replied to those with accounts :) And now, onwards!

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>The mood in the room was solemn as Rin began to pack up her belongings, starting with the small dresser that had been provided. She took out her sweatpants, a grey sweater and other pieces of clothing before carefully folding them into her duffle bag. She then moved on to the white nightstand, her right hand shaking as she went to open the top drawer. She bit the inside of her cheek to stop herself from crying, but it didn't work. <em>Nothing worked. <em>Inside the drawer was a photo of them on their wedding day. She was wearing an impeccably designed white dress and _he _was wearing a black tuxedo that had been perfectly tailored to his body. Her heart constricted as her eyes fell upon _him. She was so confused, so heartbroken. So... pathetic. _Quickly she slammed the photo in her bag, placing her jacket on top of it before zipping it up. A soft knock on the door startled Rin from her thoughts.

"Hey," Ayame greeted softly, pushing in the wheelchair.

"Hi," Rin cast her friend a brief smile as she sat down on the edge of the hospital bed, pulling on her brown boots.

"Ready to go?" Ayame asked, handing Rin the release papers she needed to sign before she could leave.

Rin nodded, grabbing a pen and scribbled her name on the dotted line. _Rin Takahashi._ She glanced at the signature; her hand hovered over the paper. The signage was automatic, having spent hours perfecting it days before their wedding. She paused before she dotted the i; she wasn't going to be Rin Takahashi for much longer. She looked down at the floor, feeling her heart sink into her stomach.

_What happened to us?_ Kami, just a week ago, she remembered waking up next to him, teasing him about how perfect his hair was, even in the morning. She remembered snuggling up to him in the middle of the night, how he would tease her about her cold feet. She remembered how he would hold her hand, how they fit so perfectly, and his butterfly kisses. She shut her eyes, _maybe; maybe this was all a bad dream._

"It seems we have another visitor," Ayame announced, motioning to the door.

Rin whipped her head around, her breath hitched as she caught the sight of that unmistakable silver hair. "Sesshomaru?" She asked, hopeful, her voice a soft whisper.

"Hey Rin," Inuyasha waltzed in the room, a wide smile plastered on his face, "Thought I'd come by to see my favorite pygmy before my shift starts."

Rin couldn't help but smile in return; though it wasn't Sesshomaru, she was still happy to see him. "Hey Yasha," she embraced him warmly.

"How's it going little lady?" He asked, pulling away as he leant against the pale blue walls.

"They're finally letting me leave today." Rin told him, playing with her purple silk scarf. Her mind wandered; Sesshomaru had bought it for her when they had gone to Italy last year to celebrate Inutaisho's 55th birthday...

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p><em>Rin held Sesshomaru's hand as they walked upon the cobblestone roads, her eyes darting back and forth at the amazing sights and smells surrounding them. "Oh my gosh!" she squeezed his hand, pointing eagerly to a horse and carriage, "It's a horse!" <em>

_Sesshomaru chuckled, brushing his thumb against her hand, "So it is. Is this your subtle way of asking to go on it?" _

_She grinned, biting the corner of her bottom lip, "Maybe." _

_He smirked, kissing her forehead, "Very well." He released his hold on her, to talk to the man with the horse. Moments later, he lifted Rin into the carriage, joining her seconds later. She rested her head atop of his shoulder, delight brightly shining through her chocolate eyes. "This is so amazing," she murmured, playing with his hands, "Thank you for bringing me to Florence." _

_He brushed his lips against her ringed-finger, "Thank you for joining me. This trip would have been incredibly dull without you." _

_She giggled, "D'aww," she pecked his lips, "You're so sweet." She nuzzled his chest, "I love you." They were silent for a moment, relishing in the ambience, taking in the sounds of the people, the motorbikes, the brick buildings, the statues. _

"_Oh!" Rin sat erect, leaning over the edge, "What is that?" she asked, pointing to a sea of umbrella tops. _

"_The leather market," he replied, "Would you care to go?"_

_She nodded eagerly, "Yes please." _

_He tapped the man's shoulder, handing him a twenty-euro bill, "Stop here."_

"_Si," the carriage stopped, the man jumping down to help Rin off. "Grazie," she thanked the gentleman as Sesshomaru gracefully leapt off, landing next to her. He took her hand, "Shall we?"_

"_Mmhmm," her eyes were bright and wide, running from booth to booth. "I didn't think this place could get any better but it just did!" she exclaimed, holding out a leather jacket, "I mean, just look at this! Smell it!" she thrusted the jacket in his face, "It smells so... real." She set the jacket back onto the table, "Oh! Look! Scarves!" She pulled him along to the next booth, "Oh man, oh man." _

"_Having a good day miss?" The elderly Italian man asked, leaning against his table. _

"_Yes, very. Your scarves are very beautiful."_

_The man let out a deep laugh, "Why of course they are! Handmade! 100% silk! Beautiful, no? But, not as beautiful as you. You!" he pointed to Sesshomaru, "Why you no buy this beauty one of my scarves." _

_Sesshomaru raised a brow; he couldn't help but be impressed by his sales pitch. "I can't argue with your logic. Rin?" He motioned to the shelves, "Are there any that appeal to you?" _

_She blushed, "Maru." She scuffed her heel, looking up at him, "You don't have to." _

"_Nonsense," he lifted her chin, "I want to. Now choose a scarf before this man beheads me and takes you for his wife." _

_She laughed, "Ok. For your precious life, I will choose one." It took her twenty minutes, and him 150 Euros, before they left the booth with a bag stuffed to the brim with scarves, for not only Rin, but for Ayame, Jakotsu, his step-mother, and even Kagome. _

"_You know," he suggested casually as they walked to their hotel, hand-in-hand, "You should wear that scarf tonight." _

_She cocked her head to the side, "But the dinner's tonight! It won't really match my dress." _

_He smirked, leaning down to whisper in her ear, "Tonight. After the dinner, and just the scarf." _

_Her eyes widened, nodding her head._

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Rin clutched the scarf, feeling her chest tighten. <em>Stop it. Just stop thinking about him. <em>She sent Inuyasha a warm smile, hoping to hell it looked sincere, "I'm excited to get out of here."

"Yeah, that's good. So you're heading home then?"

Rin nodded, her eyes darting to the door, "Yup, you're just in time to say goodbye."

Ayame helped Rin into the wheelchair, setting her purple duffel bag on top of her lap. Inuyasha held the door open for them, bending down to be eye-level with Rin.

"I'll see you later, ok lil' sis'?" He murmured, pulling her into a hug.

Rin nodded, blinking back tears, "Ok." She gripped his shoulders tighter, "Have fun saving lives."

Inuyasha was silent; her eyes were bloodshot from crying, his own heart breaking for her. He released his hold on her, kissing the top of her head, "If you ever need anything, just call."

Rin smiled, kissing his cheek. "Thanks Yashie."

"Bye," Ayame said as she wheeled Rin out of the room.

"I," Rin started but was promptly interrupted by Ayame.

"You are staying with me for the next little while ok?"

Rin smiled a little, "Ok. Thank you Ayame, for being such a good friend."

"That's what best friends are for silly goose." They bid adieu to the nurses before heading to the parking garage where Kouga was waiting with the trunk to their BMW open.

"There's my two girls," he greeted, taking Rin's duffel bag and placing it into the trunk.

Rin sat in the back, unknowing what to say. Her eyes gazed over to the front where Kouga had taken Ayame's hand in his while he was driving. A ghost of a smile came across her face; they were a perfect pair. They deserved to be happy and here she was, Debby Downer, crashing their rainbow.

"If it's alright," she twiddled with her thumbs, "I'd like to go home."

"What?" Ayame shifted in her seat to look at Rin, "It's perfectly fine for you to stay with us Rin, we have more than enough room for you and all your shoes."

Rin laughed, "Thanks but... I can do it. I want to be home."

Ayame looked over to Kouga who nodded, "Ok. But if you need anything you can call me ok? Even if it's three in the morning."

Rin nodded, laying her head against the cool white leather. She toyed with the hem of her hoodie, sticking her hands in the pocket. She looked out the window, the steady stream of buildings becoming a non-sequential blur in her mind. Slowly she felt her eyelids droop, lower and lower until they were firmly closed. And so she dreamt, of him, always of him. _Sesshomaru..._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>"<em>Honestly, do you really need another pair of heels?" noted Sesshomaru, looking up from his phone.<em>

_Rin stuck out her tongue, "Just go back to your work mister, I earned these babies," she grinned holding up a pair of leather pumps, "Wedding season was crazy, but so worth it." She caressed the leather against her cheek, "Yes, come to mommy."_

_Sesshomaru raised a brow, "It seems that spending all your time in a flower shop has turned you clinically insane."_

_Rin giggled, thrusting the pair of heels into his face, "Say hi to the shoes Sesshomaru!" Rin opened and closed his mouth for him, mouthing words for a conversation between him and the heels, "Why hello there shoes. It's nice to meet you. You look so pretty! I'm so certain that you'll look fantastic on this Sesshomaru's girlfriend's feet!" Rin burst out into a fit of laughter at Sesshomaru's incredulous face, "Sorry," she apologized between the fits of laughter, "I couldn't help it."_

"_Utterly insane," he told her, kissing her forehead, "I've a call to make, I'll wait for you outside."_

"_Ok!" Rin beamed, waving to him goodbye as he left the shoe store before handing the heels to the attendee, "I'll take these please."_

_The attendee nodded, taking the heels from Rin, "If I may be so bold Miss, but your relationship with Takahashi-sama is most envious."_

_Rin blushed, "Oh, no." She shrugged, "We're just like all other normal couples."_

"_Takahashi-sama has come here once before with a previous," she hesitated to put a name to the relationship, "Dalliance, and he did not act the least bit interested in her shoe shopping."_

_Rin faltered in her step to the cash register, "Oh?"_

"_Yes, Takahashi-sama spent the majority of the time talking on the phone. Not even when she was done did he finish his conversation. He was most cold to that poor woman, but she was equally as cold to the other customers." The woman thought back to that time over a year ago, it was odd how much one woman could change a man, "He did not smile like he does with you."_

_Rin was silent, handing the woman her credit card. She looked to Sesshomaru who stood in front of the shop, speaking to one of his investors, "Thank you," she told the woman sincerely as she was handed back the shoes._

"_Of course. I'm glad that Takahashi-sama managed to find a woman like yourself."_

_Rin blushed, "Oh, no, you're too kind."_

"_No miss, you are being too modest. It's no wonder that the press has already dubbed you Tokyo's darling."_

_Rin laughed, remembering the headline from last week, "Well," she didn't know how to respond, "Thank you for dealing with my shoe craziness."_

"_Of course miss."_

_Rin shook her head as she met up with Sesshomaru, who had immediately ended his conversation on the phone once she came into his line of view, "Yes. Actually Mura-san, I will get back to you tomorrow. Yes, same to you." _

_Rin bounced up next to him, leaning on her tiptoes to place a kiss on his chin, "Have fun?"_

"_Always," he took her bag from her hands, "Success?"_

_Rin smiled, taking his hand in hers, "Always."_

* * *

><p><em>.<em>forgetmenot_._

* * *

><p>"Hey hun, we're here," Ayame shook Rin's shoulder gently, waking Rin from her impromptu nap.<p>

"Oh," Rin was drowsy as she unbuckled her seatbelt, climbing out of the luxury sedan. She thanked Kouga as he handed her the duffle bag, clutching it close as they walked up to the double french doors of the mansion she had yet to call home.

"Are you sure you want to stay here Rin?" asked Ayame once more, hugging Rin for the millionth time since the accident.

Rin nodded, "Yes, thank you both, for everything."

Kouga hugged Rin as well before they departed, leaving Rin alone on the front step, playing with the keys in her hands.

She took in a deep breath before opening the doors, being careful to step over the various toolboxes and paint cans that littered the foyer and surrounding rooms. She set the bag on the bottom of the stairs before walking up the grand staircase, finding herself in front of a white door, her hand clutching the brass handle.

She felt her heart tighten as she laid her forehead against the cool wood, urging herself to compose herself. She hesitated for another moment before opening the door, revealing a bright white room. It was piled with stuffed animals, boxes of unassembled baby furniture and shopping bags filled with baby clothes.

Rin was crying now; she grabbed a giant two-headed stuffed dragon and collapsed onto the wicker rocking chair. She inhaled deeply, and perhaps it was the effects of the painkillers or the lack of sleep but she swore she could smell _him. _Her chest felt tight as she clutched the stuffed animal closer, her own form crunched up into a ball. _Sesshomaru..._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Kouga clutched the wheel of the BMW tightly, never taking his eyes off the road. To his left sat his wife Ayame, who was looking listlessly out the tinted windows. His phone buzzed in his pocket, yet he refused to take the call.<p>

Ayame looked over, "Kouga, just answer it. Whoever's calling you really wants to get a hold of you."

Kouga sighed, pulling over onto the side of the road, "Fine." He shifted up, grabbing the phone from his pocket and answered the call. "Kouga Wolfe, ah yes, Jaken. What can I do for you? What? That's impossible. No. Yes." He cursed, "Yes. Fine. Very well. I understand. Bye." Kouga clenched his jaw, clutching the wheel harder, trying to process the conversation.

"Kouga?" Ayame's voice was soothing, but it wasn't enough to take the edge off his voice. "What's going on?" she asked, her voice peaking as she began to panic, "Is everything ok?"

"No, Ayame, everything's fucking peachy," he hissed, "The world's spinning round and round, the clouds are make of cotton candy and the birds are singing Hallelujah." He hit his fists against the steering wheel, "Fucking perfect."

Ayame sat, frozen in shock at his outburst, "Kouga-kun, I, did I do something to upset you?"

Kouga looked to his wife, her eyes beginning to water and he cursed, furious at himself with his inability to keep control. Immediately he softened, taking her hand, "I'm sorry Ayame." He sighed, cradling her head in his hands, "I'm so sorry baby." He kissed her lips, "I shouldn't take it out on you," he murmured.

"It's ok," Ayame pushed his hair behind his ear, "What's wrong?"

Kouga let out a deep breath, "_He_ wants a fucking annulment," he growled, "He claims that since he's suffering from memory loss that his whole marriage to Rin could be a scam."

"What?" Ayame didn't understand, "Who? Sesshomaru?"

Kouga sighed, "Yeah, Sesshomaru." He glanced down to his leather seat, "He wants an annulment, and wants me to have the papers ready by tomorrow morning."

Ayame looked down at her hands; Rin hadn't mentioned anything about that. "Can he do that?" Her voice was helpless, pathetic; she could feel tears prickling her eyes. _Rin..._

Kouga snorted in disgust, "It's actually pretty fucking brilliant. He has no knowledge of the marriage being consummated and there is no real proof that it occurred apart from Rin's testimony."

Ayame shook her head, "Kouga, no! You have to go talk some sense into him. He and Rin were perfect for each other! I mean," Ayame sniffed, "He was happy. They were happy. Damn it Kouga," she hit the leather armrests of her seat, frustrated. "He smiled and laughed when she was around. Anyone with a pair of eyes could see that he didn't just care about money and pleasing clients, he cared about Rin. He," she wiped away the stray tears, "He loved Rin." She was sure of it, so sure.

Kouga exhaled deeply, "I'll try. I'll drop you off at home then I'll head back to Sesshomaru's condo and try to talk him out of it."

Ayame chewed her lip, "Ok."

Kouga looked at his wife; did he tell her that he loved her today? How much he needed her? How she completed his life? He took her hand and grasped it closer, "I love you Ayame."

Ayame smiled, her eyes watery, "I know. I love you too."

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru sat behind the oak desk, sitting stiffly in the leather chair. He gripped the armrests, his head pounding. With his good hand he picked up the file he had asked Jaken to retrieve for him moments ago, trying to concentrate but it was to no avail. It was all just a blurry mess.<p>

He set down the file onto the growing pile that needed to be looked over and closed his eyes, the pain not subsiding. He opened his eyes, reaching for the bottle of pain medication he flipped open the lid and popped two pills in his mouth before chucking the bottle into his side drawer. He paused as the sound of breaking glass resonated from the compartment. He frowned and reached in for the offending item, only to pull out a picture frame. His eyes narrowed as they traced the photo; it was of _her._ She wore a strapless white tulle ball gown with a lace bodice that only accentuated her tiny figure. She was smiling at the camera, no, he shook his head, she was beaming. The sun was setting, casting a brilliant glow onto her skin. She held the hem of her skirt as she danced in a meadow, posing organically for the photo. _Was it her wedding dress?_

* * *

><p><em>.<em>forgetmenot_._

* * *

><p>"<em>Yes! Yes, that's perfect, and now, the groom, if you could please," the wedding photographer gestured for Sesshomaru to enter the frame. <em>

_Sesshomaru walked through the field to where Rin stood, smiling brilliantly as the sun began to set. "Hello good sir," she greeted him playfully, kissing him softly with her cherry glossed lips, "Fancy meeting you here," she teased, nuzzling her head against his chest._

"_Hm, what a coincidence this is," he replied, pulling her close. "Tell me, when did you take ballet classes?" he asked, referring to her previous poses through the flower patch. _

_Rin giggled, swatting his shoulder, "What can I say, it comes naturally to me."_

_He laughed, "Of course. I should have known." He looked towards the photographer who was gesturing to him to pick her up, "So it seems that I have to do this," he told her as he swept her off of his feet, causing Rin to squeal in shock, "Sesshomaru!"_

"_Rin," he replied, holding her easily, bridal-style, "Tell me, how much are we paying this man to take photos?"_

_She laughed, "Don't worry. He's brilliant. He did Ayame's photos! You saw them right? They were so pretty and," her speech was cut off though by Sesshomaru's lips descending upon her own. _

"_I'm sure he knows what he's doing."_

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru hesitated only for a second before throwing the photo into the waste bin. He turned in his chair to face the large picture window that served as the south wall of his expansive home office. He had this room set up here for this very reason. From this point, nearby buildings were tall and erect, their lights competing with the stars. He stood up and surveyed the city, taking in his surroundings. He could hear the cars pass by, the horns blaring at the pedestrians who dared to J-walk, the chatter of the people. He closed his eyes once again, gripping the top of the leather chair, but all he could see was <em>her, always her.<em>

A loud knock roused Sesshomaru from his train of thoughts, making him turn to face the door. "Come in," he returned to sit in his leather chair, not bothering to greet whomever was at the door.

Kouga pushed open the heavy oak doors, "Sesshomaru," he greeted, walking over to his desk. His eyes flickered to the waste bin where he saw the photo of Rin and stiffened.

"Kouga," Sesshomaru noticed and caught Kouga's gaze, daring him to bring it up. "What brings you to my humble abode?"

Kouga matched Sesshomaru's stony look, looking him straight in the eye, "I believe you know why."

"Hn," Sesshomaru leaned back into the seat, "I take it then that Jaken has contacted you about this... nuisance."

Kouga set his jaw, "Yes. From my understanding, you want to have an annulment of your marriage to Rin."

Sesshomaru smirked, "Bravo." He clapped his hands sarcastically, "Now is that all?" he asked, waving his hand to dismiss the man.

Kouga growled, slamming his hands against Sesshomaru's desk, "Don't you fucking dismiss me like I'm your lackey Sesshomaru. I've known you for almost 25 years. So why don't you tell me why you want to end your marriage."

Sesshomaru scoffed, "Is it not obvious?" His voice was harsh as he stood up; "I would never in my right mind associate myself with someone such as Rin, let alone marry her. She is of no social standing, nor wealth. But perhaps," he searched through a pile of files Jaken had left for him the morning of, "Under certain financial incentives, a marriage with someone like her would prove to be beneficial for this company."

"What are you saying?" Kouga paused, bewildered by his statement; how could marrying Rin be financially beneficial? She was an orphan, with no living relatives or a penny to her name.

Sesshomaru threw him a file, "I believe that should answer all your questions." He watched as Kouga opened it and began to read the contents, "As you can clearly see, the dates that are highlighted proved to be most profitable for this firm."

Kouga sat there in shock; the dates paralleled the increases in stock values. He looked up at his friend, refusing to believe it. "This," his tone was leveled, calm, "maybe this is just a coincidence."

Sesshomaru laughed cynically, his tone scathing, "Are you so utterly naive Kouga? Tell me, do you still believe in unicorns and Santa Claus?"

Kouga frowned; he looked down at the file once more, rereading the contents until they were ingrained into his memory. He had at first questioned his friend's budding relationship with Rin; she was the exact opposite of the women he usually dated, if anything, he thought _she_ could do better. But as their relationship progressed, he saw that they were a match made in heaven. And the fact that Sesshomaru had seemed genuinely happy for perhaps the first time in his life had only proved to Kouga that Rin was the woman for Sesshomaru. In his eyes, Rin's presence had altered Sesshomaru. He had been much more relaxed and content, not at all like the man who stood in front of him now. "So then Sesshomaru," he muttered, placing the file onto his desk, "it would seem that you are a great actor."

"Hn," Sesshomaru lifted a pen from his desk, signing a contract on his desk, "So it would seem."

"But you forgot that Rin was pregnant with your child. That is more than enough proof that you have consummated your marriage. Your case of fraudulence would be thrown out the window."

Sesshomaru sat back in his seat, taking a moment to think, "You seem to believe this _Rin_ to be virtuous. How do you not know that it is not another man that fathered her child?"

Kouga was astonished at his bold statement, his words cautious, "What do you suggest then?"

Sesshomaru smirked, plucking a gold pen from his pocket, "A paternity test then if you are so eager to prove that I have consummated this marriage. And if it proves to be true, than you shall simply file for a divorce."

Kouga's heart clenched, _a paternity test on a deceased fetus. _He stood up from the chair, enraged, clutching the file he left the office, only to pause at the door. "I've known you for nearly all of my life and yet it still astonishes me how much of an asshole you can be."

Sesshomaru frowned at his friend's statement before picking up a file and read it through, signing the contract at the obligatory line with an elegant scrawl of his name. _Sesshomaru Takahashi, CEO of YK Takahashi._

* * *

><p><em>xo<em>

_tuille_


	4. Chapter 4

chapter 4

by

tuille

disclaimer: not mine.

just a quick point of clarification: Sesshomaru currently resides in his penthouse which he had before he married Rin. Rin is living in their mansion which they were still building (so that's why it's unfinished). Also, Sesshomaru is remembering bits and pieces of his past, but he refuses to believe they're true. Simply put, he's being stubborn. Hopefully, it'll all make better sense in later chapters :)

cheers!

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Inutaisho sat impassively in his makeshift office, his conversation with Kouga from moments ago still playing over like a recorder in his head. <em>An annulment<em>... He stood up from the desk and walked outside onto the sandy beach where his wife was basking in the rays of the glorious sun.

"Izayoi," he greeted, taking a seat on the recliner beside her.

"Inutaisho," she looked up from her novel, smiling. She lifted the large sunglasses from her face, leaning over to him to press a kiss to his cheek. "Who called darling?"

"Kouga, he had... an important message to relay to me."

"Mmm, I should hope so." She returned to recline in the chair, slipping back on her designer sunglasses, "You did promise a phone-free vacation my dear."

So he did. He took Izayoi's hand, unsure of how to tell her the horrid news. He licked his lips, hesitating, "My love, there has been an accident."

Izayoi's eyes flew open, "What? Who?" She sat up in her seat, turning all her attention onto her husband. "Is everything ok?"

He sighed, shaking his head, "Sesshomaru and Rin." He ran a hand through his hair, "They were involved in a car accident a couple of days ago."

"What! Oh dear," Izayoi pulled on her wrap, a chill of fright coming over her, "Are they alright?" She prayed to Kami that they were.

Inutaisho took her hand, setting his head in the crook of her neck, "Rin lost their baby," he whispered softly. He refused to believe it himself; the pain of losing a child was one that no one should feel, least for someone as wonderful as Rin.

Izayoi gasped, "No. Oh no, the poor girl," she wiped a tear from her cheek, "She was so keen on having that child." Her heart ached for Rin, wanting to return home and make everything better, "We must go back."

Inutaisho nodded, "I have already arranged everything. There will be a boat to pick us up in a matter of hours. We shall be taking a red-eye back to Tokyo and we will arrive by midnight."

Izayoi sighed, "Good." She stood up, ready to head back into their secluded beach mansion and pack.

"Wait, Izayoi," he gently grabbed her arm to stop her from leaving, "That is not all."

Izayoi frowned, "Whatever do you mean?"

He paused, unsure of what to say, "Sesshomaru is suffering from memory loss." He looked to the waters, "He doesn't remember Rin."

Izayoi gasped, "Oh, no," she muttered, holding a hand to her heart, "How is Rin taking all of this then?"

"I'm unsure. But, it would safe to assume that she's not taking it well at all."

"The poor dear," Izayoi sighed against her husband's tall frame; she thought of Rin as a daughter. Her motherly instincts were bubbling through, "We need to go home, Rin," she cursed, the tears were falling freely, "She needs us."

"We'll be home soon," he pulled Izayoi closer, he didn't want to tell her, but he had to, "Sesshomaru wants to annul their marriage."

Izayoi looked up in shock, "An annulment? But... that's preposterous! They've been married for nearly a year now!"

"It would seem Izayoi, that our son is worthy of an Oscar."

Izayoi frowned, she was confused, her emotions a whirling mess, "I'm not sure what you're trying to say."

Inutaisho sighed, "It's highly possible that Sesshomaru was using his marriage to Rin to gain financially for our company. Thus, I suppose Sesshomaru has since felt that their marriage was a fraud. If it's true, he has a strong basis for an annulment."

Izayoi shook her head, "No Inutaisho, that's impossible. They were truly in love. They were meant to be. Rin," she looked to the water, the waves that crashed rhythmically against the shores were no longer comforting, "Rin would never consent to something so fraudulent."

Inutaisho laid a hand on her shoulder, "I'm not questioning Rin's actions. You know as well as I how much she genuinely loved Sesshomaru. But, perhaps, she was simply a hapless pawn in Sesshomaru's grand scheme."

Izayoi hung her head, how could Sesshomaru be so cruel to use someone as innocent as Rin for something so meaningless as money. Did he not have enough? "I see."

"As much as I would like to believe that their marriage was genuine," Inutaisho hesitated, wrapping his arm around her waist, "I don't find it implausible that it was a fraud; on his part at least."

Izayoi pulled her husband close, resting her head on his chest, "What should we do about it then?"

Inutaisho looked over at the ocean, the waves lapping gently onto the golden sand, "I don't know."

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin woke up, a painful crick in her neck. She moved her head from side to side, rubbing the spot to relieve some tension. She looked over her surroundings, feeling pieces of her heart breaking off. She had no idea how long she had slept, the drapes were pulled shut against the outside world. She leaned forward to pick up the stuffed dragon that had fallen onto the ground while she had slept, fingering the plush material.<p>

She remembered the day she had gotten the dragon. It had been on their third date; his company was hosting a moon festival for the city and he had invited her to join him as his date. Rin closed her eyes, smiling softly. That night had been the first time he had held her hand. She remembered how her heart fluttered at the touch, how she had blushed red for the rest of the night. They had walked by the numerous booths together, hand-in-hand, before she stopped in front a ring-toss station with an arrangement of prizes decorating the front of the stall. Without a word, Sesshomaru had walked up to the kiosk, handed the man some money and attempted to throw the rings onto the pegs. Though, he failed miserably. She remembered laughing at his attempt, how he paid the man four more times before the man had simply given Rin the dragon and told them to enjoy the rest of the festival. That night, when he dropped her off at her apartment, was the first time she had kissed him.

She shook her head, trying to clear her thoughts of him but it was impossible. She walked out the room, tiptoeing around the empty paint cans that littered the hallway, still clutching the plush dragon against her heart.

"Ding-dong."

Rin lifted her head; maybe it was Sesshomaru? She rushed down the staircase, flinging open the door to reveal Kouga, dressed to the nines as always, in an impeccable dark blue dress shirt and black trousers. "Hey Rin," he greeted, leaning down to give her a hug. "How are you doing?"

Rin smiled, "I'm ok." She stepped out of his embrace, wiping away the crust around her eyes, "Um, want something to drink?" She had yet to bathe since she has arrived at the house a day ago, "I'm going to take a quick shower, if that's ok."

"Yeah," Kouga wiped the sweat of his palms against his pants, "Take your time." He pulled at his tie, the tension, the guilt, were equally suffocating, "I can get a drink myself."

"Ok," she smiled softly, "I'll be back in a second."

Rin walked up the stairs and to the master bedroom, racing into the bathroom. She had seen the look on Kouga's face; whatever he was going to say, she wasn't going to like it. She held a hand to her belly, feeling empty, a tear dripping down her cheek. _Stop it Rin. Think positive._ She shook her head of all negative thoughts, quickly stripped, and stepped into the shower; relishing the warmth of the hot water. She grabbed the loofa, scrubbing down her entire body until it was raw. When she was done, she leant her head against the glass wall. The last time she had been in this shower, Sesshomaru had joined her; they were both covered in chocolate sauce, a mess created while play fighting during Rin's attempt to hone her skills as a baker in time for the baby's arrival. She sniffed back the tears,_ no more crying Rin._

She stepped out of the shower, drying herself off and donned a simple black t-shirt and grey yoga pants. She jogged down the stairs, tying her wet hair up into a messy pony tail. She met up with Kouga who was sitting silently at the kitchen island, one of three rooms that had been fully completed. He was reading over a file, swirling his gin and tonic in his left hand.

"Hey," she greeted, seating herself next to him.

"Hey," he set the file down, rubbing his forehead in frustration. "I, I don't know how to start."

Rin was silent, her eyes darting to the file he clutched in his hand. "I don't know what to tell you."

Kouga looked up at his friend, showing his haggard face. Rin bit the inside of her cheek, so it seemed that she was not the only one who had not slept well. "I'm so sorry," he murmured, handing her the file.

Rin took the file and opened it, taking out the lengthy document. _Affidavit of Application for Annulment._ She held it in shock; she knew that he wanted to end their marriage, but an annulment?

"What? I-I, I don't understand." She stood up from the island, "He, how can this be possible?" She asked, her voice breaking, "We had sex! I was pregnant," she whimpered, "I was pregnant."

Kouga heaved a deep sigh, walking over to Rin, pulling her close, "Shit, he was using you Rin."

"What?" The tears were spilling out as she clutched his shirt, "How? How was he using me?"

Kouga cursed as he stood up, handing Rin another file, one he still refused to believe himself, "For money."

"What?" Rin opened the file, this time, charts, graphs, tax statements, contracts. "What does all of this have to do with me? I didn't work for him, I-I didn't make contracts with these people."

"No, but when you were with him, the stocks for Takahashi Inc. skyrocketed. Look," he took out a graph, "April 15th, the world sees a picture of you and Sesshomaru kissing at the zoo, stocks go up 25%. September 24th, there is a public announcement that you two are engaged and stocks rise 79%. June 6th, your..."

"Wedding." Rin murmured, feeling numb.

Kouga sighed, "Wedding." He swallowed, "stocks rose 114%." He hesitated to continue, it was his last point, "January 1st, for the new year there is a public announcement of your pregnancy. Stocks soared 235%. Rin, before you, stocks in YK Takahashi were gold; they were among the top stocks available. And I guess, I guess Sesshomaru found a need for them to be the best. And so,"

"Now they are." Rin finished for him, handing him back graph. How could she have been so blind?

Kouga looked at Rin, "I tried talking to him about this but... I don't know. I don't know if he was lying or what, but the Sesshomaru that you knew, if he had changed or if he was acting, was different from the Sesshomaru I knew growing up. The Sesshomaru I knew, before he met you, would have done this. Hell, I would have probably applauded him if he had done this before I had met Ayame. But... I saw the way he looked at you and I just, goddamn-it," Kouga took a drink, he had taken a lot of them lately, especially last night when he had been writing up the legal documentation, "I don't know what to think anymore."

Rin didn't say anything; thinking about all the new information. She looked to her friend, smiling softly; she was touched by how much he cared. "Don't beat yourself up over this Kouga," she whispered. She touched her ring finger, it was bare, but perhaps it was for the best that she did not know where the rings were. Tears welled up because somewhere, deep in the back of her mind, she knew that it had all been too good to be true.

"You don't deserve this Rin." Kouga told her, "I'm so sorry."

Rin smiled, hugging Kouga, "Thank you Kouga-kun. You and Ayame have been good friends to me."

"Heh," Kouga tightened his hold on her, he thought of Rin as his little sister, hell, everyone did. She was charming, always happy, and as cute as a button. He cursed Sesshomaru for having him do the dirty work, for even thinking of doing something so horrendous to someone as kind as Rin. He sighed and pulled away, "I've got to go back to the office. I'll pick up those papers sometime tomorrow, ok?"

Rin cast a glance of the stack of papers on the granite counters, "Yeah."

She walked out with Kouga to the door, waving to him as he drove off to work. She then walked back to the counter, the natural bounce in her step gone. She sat in the plush barstool. _Affidavit of Application for Annulment._ Tears in her eyes once again, she crumpled the envelope that held the documents; not even a divorce. She laughed bitterly, an annulment. He wanted their marriage to disappear. Like it never happened.

She lifted herself out of the chair and walked out of the room and into another, their bedroom. Rin muffled a cry as her eyes darted towards the large painting of the two of them that hung above the white fireplace.

Sesshomaru had it commissioned for her twenty-third birthday. The painting was absolutely breathtaking; it was of their first dance as husband and wife. There was movement in the painting, the hues soft and muted. A large grin adorned her face and what seemed to be a half of a smile on Sesshomaru's. She looked away from the painting, running to the large king-sized bed. She buried herself underneath the covers, grabbing his pillow and clutching it to her form. She sobbed; she was surrounded by his smell now, lying on his side of the bed. How she longed for his arms to embrace her. To soothe her, to hold her, to love her. She peeked up from underneath the covers, daring to gaze at the painting once more.

Had that all been a dream? Had she really been so naive to fall for him so blindly? _Was it all a lie?_

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>"Ohayou-gozaimasu Takahashi-sama," greeted his secretary as he walked past. He frowned in reply, ignoring all the greetings that rang out afterwards. Finally, he reached the solitude of his office. He flicked on the lights with his right hand, taking in his office. It had changed over the past three years; the curtains were changed to a billowy cream silk, his desk now bamboo, the walls were exposed brick of blue hues and grey. Flowers seemed to scatter the whole building; even an orchid had taken rest on his coffee table, though wilting. Her. He growled, his eyes catching the fireplace. He walked closer to it, his gaze darting from picture to picture.<p>

He stood, rooted to the same position he had been in for the past fifteen minutes, staring at the numerous photos that adorned the marble mantelpiece. Them at a picnic, her head nestled on top of his shoulder as they watched the sunset; Them at DisneyLand, Mickey Mouse ears donning his head and a large crown on hers; Them with his family, celebrating his father's 55th birthday; One of just Rin, on a beach, their honeymoon and finally, the center-most photo within an elegant silver frame; their wedding. He lifted the frame to inspect it further; it was a picture of their first kiss as husband and wife.

Sesshomaru frowned at the memory. _Wife..._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p><em>It was Rin's turn to speak, all eyes on her as she tried to compose herself. She was crying, wiping away the tears with the back of her hand. She let out a deep breath, clutching his fingers in her hands. "Sesshomaru, ever since I was little, I've dreamt of my prince charming. A man who would save me from my dragons, take me away from my tower, and who would ride a white horse. Instead, I got you." She giggled with delight as she heard the audience peel out in laughter. "You, Sesshomaru Takahashi. Although you don't have a horse, and we're not going to live in a castle with pink grass, have zebras for pets, trees made of cotton candy, and moats filled with koi fish, I still love you. I promise to love you everyday that I live, and that you, and only you, will have my heart, my soul. You were my first kiss, as silly as that sounds, I mean, who gets to the age of 21 without a first kiss?" She let out a shaky laugh, squeezing his hand, "But you were my first kiss and you'll be my last. I love you. I love you so much and," she sniffed, "I'm still pinching myself to wake up. I love you Maru, and I'm deliriously happy that you're going to be my husband for the rest of my life."<em>

_"May I have the rings?" The vicar thanked Kouga, holding the two white bands in his hand. "As a token that you will faithfully perform these vows, you will exchange rings" he handed Sesshomaru the wedding band, "Please, repeat after me."_

_Rin blushed as Sesshomaru took her hand, brown eyes unwavering as she took in the man in front of her. Sesshomaru's baritone was calm, cool, collected, "With this ring, I thee wed, and with it, I bestow upon thee all the treasures of my mind, heart, and hands." He placed the white gold band on her ring finger. Her heart was pounding, her stomach fluttering with nerves._

_Sesshomaru brushed his thumb over her palm, "You're shaking," he noted softly._

_Rin bit her lip, refusing to cry anymore. "Sorry," she apologized meekly, taking the ring from the vicar who smiled encouragingly._

_"It's ok love. Now, if you would please repeat after me?"_

_"Yes." Rin gulped, holding the ring at the tip of his finger, "With this ring, I thee wed, and with it, I bestow upon thee all the treasures of my mind, heart, and hands."_

_The vicar grinned, raising his hands, "May these rings be blessed as the symbol of this affectionate unity. These two lives are now joined in one unbroken circle. Wherever they go, may they always return to one another. May these two find in each other the love for which all men and women yearn. May they grow in understanding and in compassion. May the home which they establish together be such a place that many will find there a friend. May these rings on their fingers symbolize the touch of the spirit of love in their hearts. I now pronounce you man and wife; Sesshomaru Takahashi, you may kiss your bride."_

_Sesshomaru smirked, finally, he thought as he leant down, kissing those soft lips, so enticing, so enchanting. He pulled back when he felt a drop of her tears fall onto his nose. He chuckled, removing the tears with his lightly calloused thumb, "Must you always cry?"_

_"Hai," she pulled his head back down, brushing her lips against his, "Husband," she murmured. She grinned, taking his hand as they walked down the rose-petaled aisle._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>He shook his head, his mind told him to take them all down, throw them into the fireplace, but he couldn't. Why couldn't he? What invisible force was stopping him from reaching out for those photos?<p>

"Sesshomaru," a deep baritone voice suddenly filled the room, shivers running down Sesshomaru's spine.

Sesshomaru turned, facing the sole man who dared to barge into his private office. His face was impassive as he studied the man, dressed in a deep blue suit, fitted perfectly to his body. "Father."

Inutaisho gestured for Sesshomaru to have a seat in one of the seats in front of the large desk whilst he took it upon himself to take the plush executive leather chair, unbuttoning the clasps of his jacket. "It seems son, that we have a problem."

"Oh?" Sesshomaru leaned back into the chair, casually folding his arms, "I was unaware that there were any with this company."

Inutaisho glared, "It is not the company of whom I am talking about."

Sesshomaru matched his father's stony look, like father like son. "I do believe that is none of your concern."

Inutaisho stood up from the desk, slamming one hand furiously against the table, "None of my concern?" he snarled, "I built this business from nothing and here you are jeopardizing everything." He turned around, taking a deep breath to calm himself down, pinching the bridge of his nose, this was not how things were supposed to happen, "Tell me son, when was the last time you spoke to Rin?"

Sesshomaru sneered, "You have no say in my personal life, father."

"No?" Inutaisho was furious, that ungrateful pup, "Who is it then Sesshomaru, that gave you this position as CEO of YK Takahashi? The tooth fairy?"

Sesshomaru growled, standing up, matching his father's stance, "I worked my ass off for this position. Unlike that precious doctor son of yours. Tell me, father," he sneered at the word, at the audacity of the man in front of him, "How much money did you have to pledge to the University for them to allow the entrance of someone like Inuyasha? A couple of million? Perhaps you even built them a couple of libraries?"

Inutaisho narrowed his eyes, "Inuyasha worked hard for his grades Sesshomaru. You would have known that if you had payed more attention than a sparse glance and insult every once in a blue moon while you were growing up."

Sesshomaru laughed cynically, "You are criticizing my brothering abilities? Then perhaps we should talk about your fathering abilities. Hn? I believe I saw you, what was it, perhaps once a month for dinner? You'd come to two out of thirty of my soccer games, yet all of Inuyasha's. I always wondered who you favored. Bravo." His tone was sarcastic, scathing, "Father of the year." Sesshomaru scoffed, picking up a file and throwing it into the fireplace, enjoying the crackling sounds as the paper was disintegrated in the fire.

The pair was silent, Inutaisho hanging his head. He would be the first to admit that he had not been the best father to Sesshomaru, but he had been working hard to provide for his family. A family that Sesshomaru lacked while growing up. While Sesshomaru had been with Rin, their relationship had vastly improved. Hell, Sesshomaru had even got along with Inuyasha. Even asking Inuyasha to be a groomsmen for his wedding party. He looked towards Sesshomaru, "Adeo ne hominem immutare ex amore, ut non cognoscas eundem esse?"

Sesshomaru frowned; _Is it possible that a man can be so changed by love, that you could not recognize him to be the same?_ Latin, he thought bitterly, had been his "thing" with his father. "I know not of what you speak."

"Perhaps not." Inutaisho cast his eyes down to the hardwood floor, "Tell me son, will you not for a second rethink your decision to end your relationship with Rin?" His voice was calm but inside he was shaking, all but ready to get down on his hands and knees and beg him to reconsider.

"It seems that it is necessary for me to reiterate my position of your say in my personal life." Sesshomaru spat.

"Sesshomaru, I'm your father."

"You stopped being my father the moment you married that whore."

Inutaisho was beyond furious now, standing from the leather seat, slamming his hands against the desk, "You ungrateful bastard. Do you not for a moment ever think of anyone else besides yourself? Or is all you ever think about money? You dared to use someone so innocent in your little ploy to gain a couple more clients? Some more money? Let me tell you this, money can't buy you love."

Sesshomaru frowned at his father's outburst, "Love is unnecessary."

Inutaisho shook his head, "What happened to you Sesshomaru? When you had been with Rin, you were a different man. You were someone I was proud to call my son. But now? Now I don't think I've ever been more disappointed in you."

Sesshomaru snarled, "If that is how you feel than perhaps you should leave my office then?"

"Fine," Inutaisho stalked out the room, pausing at the door, "Is it perhaps that I failed as your father?" he asked before softly closing the door.

Inside the office Sesshomaru was fuming, throwing open the doors of his liquor cabinet and poured himself a cup of scotch, downing the liquor in one gulp. He hissed, enjoying the burning sensation running down his throat. He poured himself and another before he found himself in the same seat his father had been, eyes drooping, lower and lower until he was fully passed out.

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p><em>"Sesshomaru," a soft whisper from afar roused him from his sleep, "Sesshomaru."<em>

_Sesshomaru opened his eyes, finding himself in a white room. He palmed the silk sheets he laid upon, averting his gaze from the blaring sun. A giggle to his right brought pleasure to his senses, a finger brushing against his solid chest sent chills through his body._

_"Maru," an angelic figure appeared, the beams of light from the sun projecting behind her. She was nude, save for the diamond rings that adorned her left hand. She sang his name, her soft tendrils tickling his bare chest. "Wake up," she murmured, her warm breath on his cheek, "We've got a full day ahead of us."_

_He was silent, unmoving, a picturesque Adonis, taking in the breath-taking creature before him. He moved his hand, running it along her soft curves, eliciting sighs of pleasure, stopping to cup her derriere in his palm. She giggled once more, shifting down to rest her head atop of his chest. "So you're finally awake."_

_"So I am." A lazy smile donned his face, a rarity of its kind. He took hold of her left hand, running his fingers over the jeweled bands that covered her ring finger. "Wife."_

_She bit her lip, wife, she thinks, burying herself in his side, trying to hide the large grin that dons her face; it all seems too good to be true. "Husband," she replied in a whisper, butterfly kisses splayed onto his torso._

_"Are you sore?" he asked, holding her close. He thought back to the night before; their wedding night. A satisfied smirk splayed on his face. Mine. His hand trailed down her body possessively, pressing a kiss onto her hand._

_She laughed, shaking her head; he had been slow, gentle. She ran her fingers up and down, he was always the gentleman, "I'm fine. Last night," she blushed now, looking at the silk sheets, "Last night was... perfect."_

_He nodded, enjoying the silence, the tranquility he feels only when he is with her. He looked to his left, the grand windows providing him a view of the sandy white beach._

_She smiled, listening to his heartbeat, tracing patterns onto his warm flesh. First a heart, then a house, his name, her name, a tree, a flower, it seems to never end, sending tingles down his spine. "Enough," he murmured, caging her wrist in his hand._

_She pouted, leaning up onto her elbows, chocolate meeting amber. "You're no fun."_

_"No?" He raised a brow, quickly trapping her underneath his body. She squealed in delight, running her hands down his torso, "Much better," she said, capturing his lips with her own. He smirked, fisting those midnight locks, pressing her deep into the mattress. This time, this time he was more forceful. __When oxygen became necessary he pulled away, catching his breath before greedily taking her lips once more. She moaned, it drove him to the brink of insanity, gripping her small waist, no doubt leaving bruises ready to be discovered in the days to follow._

_"Maru," she murmured, her eyes fluttering with every kiss he pressed onto her soft skin. Her mind was hazy, feelings of ecstasy aroused with each touch._

_"Riiiinnnn," he hissed when he peaked, collapsing on top of her small form, utterly exhausted. He lay on her for a brief moment, catching his breath. He couldn't help but chuckle, his appetite for her was insatiable. He pulled her close, brushing his lips softly against her forehead. She was exhausted now, snuggling into the crook of his neck._

_"But we just woke up," she murmured, struggling to keep her eyes open. She attempted to get out of bed, half-heartedly, but his grip around her petite waist was firm, holding her to his side. "The dolphins, and the," she yawned, giving up, pulling him closer, using his warm torso as a pillow, "The yacht-thingy."_

_He chuckled once more, it was deep and affectionate, "Sleep," he told her, brushing her hair to the side, "they will be there later."_

_"Oh, ok. Aishiteru," her eyelids drooped low, her energy drained._

_He said nothing, reaching for her left hand, playing with the diamond-encrusted band before pressing a kiss to it._

_"Maru," she whispered once more before she she fell asleep._

_He smiled, perfection. Surely, this was serenity. He caressed her rosy cheek, "Rin."_

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru awoke from the dream, gripping the edges of his leather seat. What was that? He rubbed his face with his hands, nearly pinching himself to make him stop thinking of her. He closed his eyes but all he could see was her, her long hair, her soft, porcelain skin, her eyes, so warm, so expressive, her lips, cherry red and inviting...<p>

_Maru._

He jumped as he heard her voice, though it was nothing more than a hushed whisper. He cursed, standing up abruptly, his amber eyes darting across his expansive office. _She is not here_, he told himself repeatedly.

_Maru._

He heard it once more; he cursed, sending the empty glass to its demise. He clutched his head, trying to forget her.

_Maru._

"Leave!" he ordered, the ongoing headache makes him angrier. A dream, that's all it was. _A sick, horrid, dream._

Minutes later, the voice was finally gone. He collected himself, redoing his tie. He laughed cynically, palming himself through the front of his trousers; he was hard. Disgusting. He walked to his adjoining bathroom, splashing the cool water onto his face from the porcelain sink. He gripped the edge of this sink, regarding his reflection in the mirror. Who was that man in the dream? Surely not he, no, he did not care for that, whore.

_Riiiinnnn._

"FUCK!"

He punched the mirror, ignoring the pain, the crimson river trailing from his hand to the sink. He breathed deeply, fingering the wooden edges of mirror. It's different. He didn't remember the black frame. He closed his eyes, no, he thought, Rin had bought it, at a flea market...

"FUCK!" He sunk to his feet, his hand throbbing, and the headache worse than ever.

_Rin._ He closed his eyes, his thoughts always on her.

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>xoxo<p>

tuille


	5. Chapter 5

chapter 5

by

tuille

disclaimer: anything that you recognize is not mine.

yay! i was nominated for best-one shot! i think the contest is over though :P anyways, warning: jerk ahead.

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin let out a deep breath as she parked in front of those iron gates, resting her forehead on the top of her steering well. She closed her eyes, gripping her fists, willing herself to get out of the car. Two minutes passed before she dared to open her eyes again. The song on the radio had changed to a melancholic ballad of lost love and the young couple that had walked by were now at the end of the street, still swinging their joined hands.<p>

She smiled softly as a new couple walked into her view; this time old and frail. The elder woman clutched her husband's arm for support as he shuffled them past with his walking stick. They did not speak, simply holding each other's hands, comfortable with their own silence. They stopped for a brief moment, the elderly gentleman bending down to tie the woman's loose shoe lace. Rin's eyes began to water as she watched the tender moment; the woman kissed his cheek when he straightened up and bashfully pulled away. The woman smiled as he offered his arm once again, tucking her aged hand into the crook of his elbow. At that moment Rin couldn't help but feel like an intruder yet she continued to watch until they had shuffled out of her view.

Oh how she had wished that could have been her and Sesshomaru. How they would have grown old, have children, have grandchildren, and still be as madly in love as they had from the beginning. _Foolish, naive Rin._ She shook her head of the thoughts; _enough of the past._ With a heavy sigh she opened the door to her car and stepped out into the cool breeze, the sun kissing her porcelain skin.

Rin walked through the gates slowly, one foot in front of the next, her heart aching, clutching the handle of a woven basket. She walked to the left, three steps, then four, before she stopped mid-stride. She smiled softly in recognition, lifting a yellow gardenia from the basket and laid it against the marble head stone. She bowed her head in respect before walking away, this time towards a large Sakura tree. She set the basket onto the ground next to the tree, reaching up for one of the purple blossoms. With a gleam of success she smiled, fingering the silk petals before adding it to her basket. She reached down, taking the old bouquet from the small vase she had placed next to the marble stone years ago. She placed a new arrangement in the vase, adding the purple blossom.

"Hi mom, dad, Taro," she greeted, sitting down next to the grave, crossing her legs. "I," she hesitated to continue, "A lot has happened since I talked to you guys last."

She wiped the moisture around her eyes quickly away before it could spill out, "Do you remember when I brought Sesshomaru here for the first time?" She laughed, tracing figures into the brown dirt, "He probably thought I was crazy, talking to you guys like that." She smiled softly as she remembered that day, "We would have made such cute kids don't you think? They'd definitely have his hair of course, it's always so perfect, oh, and his eyes. They're such a nice color, almost like gold. But," she closed her eyes, "That... that's not going to happen anymore..." Rin trailed off, taking out the brown folder, "He wants an annulment."

She let the tears fall as she opened to the last page where she had to sign, "It was too good to be true wasn't it?" She took a pen from the basket, folding her hands in her lap, "Do you remember reading me all those princess stories when I was little? How the princess was always in trouble and then Prince Charming would come in and save the day?" She laughed,_ stupid, naive Rin,_ "I thought he was my Prince Charming; he was so handsome and kind and most of all, he wanted me." _Orphaned, poor, plain-looking me_. She wanted to kick herself for being so blind, "I should have known better than that. Prince Charming doesn't exist in real life." _Only in fairytales._

She took her hand to the paper, her hand shaking as she signed her first name before she paused, "What do I write?" she asked, her voice strained, "Do I write Takahashi? Or Todoko?" _My maiden name._

"Shit," she cursed, hating this, hating life, furious with herself for managing to get into this situation. She finished, signing the paper before throwing it back into the folder. She brought her legs to her chest, laying her chin to rest on knees. "It's not fair," she whimpered, furiously wiping away the tears as they flowed down her cheeks. Even after her family's death had she never felt so alone, "Why don't I get a happily ever after?"

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru looked over the papers, signing it with a quick flick of his wrist before handing it to Kouga.<p>

Kouga was solemn as he took the papers from Sesshomaru, "We will need Rin's copy before I can send this in to the judge."

"Fine. Anything else?" Sesshomaru asked, eager to dismiss Kouga so he could be alone.

Kouga sighed, "Nothing else." He left the room, closing the oak doors behind him, leaving Sesshomaru in his office. Kouga stood in the hall, contemplating burning the papers but it would be in vain; Sesshomaru would just have him print off another copy.

_I'm so sorry Rin_, he thought, handing them to the receptionist, "Have this photocopied and send one copy to my office. Rin's copy should be arriving momentarily and when it does, ensure that you photocopy it as well, sending a copy to both Sesshomaru and I and the original, along with this copy, to Judge Totosai's office."

"Yes sir," the secretary took the file from Kouga, daring to be bold she peeked inside, gasping at what she read. "Sir?" To her left, the intern perked up in her seat, lazily moving towards the pair.

Kouga's nose flared, slamming the file shut, "I expect complete and utter discretion with this delicate matter; am I clear?" He spoke low, eying the intern distastefully.

"Yes sir," the secretary gulped, shifting uncomfortably throughout his tempered gaze. This paper would be the reason for Rin's absence at the office, and the solemn mood of those close to Sesshomaru. But an annulment? What had gone wrong? Had they not been the perfect couple? "If I may be so bold sir," the secretary dared to peek up, "But how are you planning on spinning this to everyone? Everyone in the office simply adores Rin, as do the public."

Kouga caught the secretary's gaze, thinking back to the conversation he had just moments ago with Sesshomaru and the head of PR, Miroku. "You don't want to know."

"Yes sir," the secretary whispered, folding her hands over the file.

Back inside the conference room, Sesshomaru sat at the head of the large table, tapping his fingers repeatedly against the cool wood. His head was beginning to hurt and the painkillers no longer helped. He tugged his tie, loosening the sleeves of his shirt. _Kami, I can't breathe. _He exhaled sharply, trying to make sense of the papers in front of him but it was all a blurry mess. He cursed, rubbing his face; he needed to leave.

He strode back to his private office, pulling on his suit-jacket before exiting the building, taking his personal elevator down to the parking garage. He walked past his Mercedes; he didn't feel like driving. He continued walking, heading towards the east side of town. He ignored the calls of his name, the shop fronts that promised good sales and the delicious aroma of food. He failed to realize how far he had gone before he found himself in front of a flower shop.

_Ayame and Rin's Creations._

This flower shop... was the endeavor of his wife and Ayame, was it not? _Ex-wife_, he reminded himself, absentmindedly thumbing his ring finger. He took the shop in; it was inviting, flowers nearly spilling out of the windows. The scent was intriguing, a blend of the various flowers from within. He spotted Ayame through the large windows, fluttering to and fro inside, helping two customers simultaneously while a teenaged boy, with his gangly arms, carried large bags of fertilizer to the back. His gaze met Ayame's briefly before she glared back at him and returned to her business at hand. He scoffed, rolling his eyes, walking away from shop only to be stopped three blocks down by a tug of his hair.

"You," Ayame spat, poking him in the chest when he turned to face her, "You selfish, idiotic, asshole."

Sesshomaru raised a brow, "Are you quite done?" This was doing nothing to ease his headache.

"No I'm not, thanks." Ayame was furious, slapping him across his face, "You are a piece of shit. How could you do that to Rin? What did she ever do to you except love you? You vile,"

Sesshomaru grabbed her hand before she could slap him once more, his tone cold as he spoke, "Do not make more of a fool of yourself than you already are."

"Me? A fool?" Ayame laughed bitterly, taking her hand from his grasp, "You're the jerk who used my best-friend just so he could make a couple more dollars. You! You're an asshole. I hate you," she began to pound his chest repeatedly with his fists, "You bastard. Money-hungry bastard. Did you plan the car accident too? Or was that just a happy coincidence? Were you planning on having Rin killed? Or were you just going to divorce her once she had the baby? Why don't you tell me Sesshomaru, when exactly were you planning on letting everyone in on your pathetic scheme?" Tears flowed, how she hated him with all her being.

Sesshomaru growled, throwing her off of him, "Enough. Don't forget Ayame, that it is _I_ who employs your husband. You know those fancy baubles, expensive dresses and this little hobby store of yours, don't forget who paid for them."

Ayame sniffed, shocked at his statement. He thought that she was a gold digger, "You are a bastard," she spat, tears prickling as she slapped him once more before running back to her shop.

Sesshomaru glared at the small crowd that had gathered to watch, "This is none of your business," he told them, walking away. He refused to acknowledge the growing ache on his cheek, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

When had he planned on ending his marriage to Rin? Soon, he reasoned, most likely a year after the baby had been born. He faltered in his step; he hadn't planned the accident, had he?

He shook his head, continuing his walk. He needed to stop thinking of _that_ woman.

Next he found himself in front of a set of black gates, a small, sleek car parked to the side of the fenced in plot. _Tokyo Cemetery_. His grandfather was buried here was he not? Sesshomaru pushed open the gates, continuing his walk, this time with a purpose. _To find his grandfather._

His grandfather had been his idol growing up; his father had left him and his mother for a new family, throwing away his inheritance for some _woman_. His grandfather saw to it to that he be raised correctly, instilling in him all that he knew; to hate _that_ woman, to despise his father, to work hard to be the top of the food chain, to be as ruthless as he was charming, molding him into a perfect, younger replicate.

Sesshomaru stopped walking once he found the gravestone, kneeling down to pay his respects.

Takahiro Takahashi, July 18th, 1930 - September 15th, 2008.

Sesshomaru frowned as he fingered the yellow petals of the gardenia that had been placed on top of the gravestone. Surely he had not placed this; it was too fresh. Sesshomaru looked around but saw nothing. _No one else was here_. He shrugged it off; perhaps it was from another one of his grandfather's visitors. He closed his eyes, bowing his head in respect before turning around, intent on walking back to his office. He froze as the breeze brought the sound of a woman's voice. Curious, he moved towards the Sakura tree, intent on finding the source of the voice. Whoever it was, she was crying. _They were at a graveyard; it only made sense for tears to be shed. Yet... why was it so enchanting?_

His eyes narrowed as they set on the woman, standing atop of the small hill next to the Sakura tree, the wind blowing through her hair. He cursed as he caught a look at her face;_ it was her_. She wore a white sundress, her fingers gripped tightly around a wicker basket. She looked ethereal; her form was small and delicate. Her eyes were much too large, too expressive for such a plain face. Her nose flat, her lips unpainted, her cheeks red from the sun.._.beautiful_. He gripped his hands into fists, refusing to believe such a thing; she was much too simple, too ordinary for his tastes. _Yet why did he ache to hold her? To caress her ivory skin? _To taste those soft lips just once more?__

He cursed silently, the headache returning. He clutched his forehead, the pain was sharp, almost excruciating. He should have left yet he stood rooted to the ground, still watching as she fell to her knees. His phone buzzed against his leg, but he ignored it. _Why did he ignore it?_

He looked towards her once more, a large bouquet stood next to her in a hand-painted glass vase; _the yellow gardenias._ That flower on his grandfather's grave was from her, but why?

He took a step back, cursing once again as he stepped on a twig, the sound resonating in the eerily quiet cemetery. She looked towards the sound, only to catch a glimpse of his silver hair for _he_ had left as soon as he had spotted _her_.

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin turned her head sharply as she heard the twig break. <em>Who was there?<em> "Hello?" Her soft voice carried through the cemetery without a reply. Her heart clenched as she spotted that unmistakable hair,_ no, no. Don't be stupid Rin_. Here she was, she chided herself, hallucinating that she had spotted him. She laughed bitterly, running her hand through her hair, _what would he be doing here anyways?_ She exhaled deeply, running her hands over the marble stone, "I always knew that it was too good to be true." She pushed herself up from the ground, wiping off the residual dirt off of her dress. She bowed deeply before she headed back to her car.

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>"Jaken," Sesshomaru called for his assistant through his intercom, sitting on top of the cold leather seat.<p>

"Yes sir?" Jaken's voice was crackly through the system, "What can I do for you sir?"

"Have you finished that background check as I requested?"

Jaken's gaze fell to the papers scattered along his work station, "Uh... yes sir?"

Sesshomaru snarled, "Then why have you not placed it in my hands?"

Jaken cursed, jumping up from behind his desk. He gathered the papers in front of him, stuffing it into a grey folder, "Right away sir. I will be in momentarily sir. So sorry sir."

"Hn." Sesshomaru took his finger off the intercom, halting the conversation. He stood up from his chair, beginning to pace. _That woman,_ he thought, _what had been so enchanting about her that he married her? Why did he succumb to her so easily? Why her? Why not a debutant? A daughter of a potential business partner? An actress? The heiress to a nation-wide hotel chain. Why then, did he choose to marry a doe-eyed girl with no parents and not a cent to her name?_

"Sir?" Jaken called out tentatively through the heavy wood doors.

Sesshomaru turned his head sharply towards the door, "Come in Jaken."

"Thank you sir," Jaken used his shoulder to get through, his hands full of folders and coffee. "The files you requested sir and your coffee. I must tell you sir, it was most difficult to locate everything that you requested but I did with much haste as per requested."

"Hn," Sesshomaru returned to his seat, opening up the first file and read through the first page. He took a sip of his coffee, frowning with distaste, "This is horrible."

Jaken flailed, his eyes in an utter panic, "I'm so sorry sir! You requested a black coffee and that is what I thought I've brought!"

Sesshomaru rolled his eyes, "Enough." He frowned as Jaken's form huddled over him, "Why are you still here Jaken?"

Jaken hesitantly shuffled from side to side before pulling out a plastic baggie from his pocket, "The hospital just sent these sir," he placed the bag in front of Sesshomaru.

Sesshomaru's expression was blank as he picked up the bag, disgusted with its contents, "Explain this to me."

Jaken's expression faltered, "It's... it's your wedding bands sir."

Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed, "And why did you feel the need to give them to me?"

"I," Jaken's eyes darted around the room for an escape. He gulped nervously, tugging on his bow tie, "It was very foolish of me sir. Utterly foolish. So sorry to insult you sir."

Sesshomaru's eyes flashed red, "Leave."

"Yes sir! Thank you for being so considerate sir." Jaken bowed several times before he left his office, "I promise not to be so inconsiderate in the future."

Sesshomaru shook his head at his assistant's incompetence. Surely, was he the only person capable of doing anything? He scoffed as he opened the bag, the three rings falling onto the bamboo wood in unison. He frowned as he picked up the largest band; it was platinum, with a double mil-grain of diamonds running parallel to each other. _His wedding band._ He set it back down before he picked up the female version, much smaller than his own. And then, the piece de resistance, the engagement ring; a Jean Schlumberger original. He refused to believe that he put much thought into it, fingering the platinum edges with his forefinger. The ring was magnificent; the center stone a round, brilliant three carat yellow canary diamond, complemented by pave-set diamonds. It was inspired to look like a flower bud.

His frown only intensified as he noted etching on the inside of the ring. He held it to the closer to the light, making it easier to make out the sentence._ Amor meus amplio quam verba est._ Sesshomaru growled as he translated the sentence. _My love is more than words._

He dropped the ring onto his desk, anger boiling over. He strode to the liquor cabinet once more, throwing open the first bottle of alcohol he saw. _Lies. All lies._ His eyes were tinted red with rage; that woman, what did she do to him? He did not believe in love. Love was for the weak, for the pathetic fools who believed that love made everything better. No, he thought, taking another swig from the bottle, he did not need love. He did not need _her_.

_Maru._

Again, he heard that girl. He clutched his head, willing her away. Sesshomaru cursed, gathering the rings on his desk, storming to the fireplace, throwing them in. That woman, why did she never leave his thoughts? He was enraged, throwing all of the picture frames into the fireplace as well, enjoying the sounds of the breaking glass. _That bitch. That manipulative bitch. She had to go._

"Sir?" A sleek red head peeked through his doors, "Oh sir, is everything alright?"

Sesshomaru stood still, the anger seeping through, "You," he snarled, "Who are you?"

The woman pouted, unbuttoning the first three buttons of her satin blouse. "Why sir, you don't _remember_ little old me?" She closed the doors to his office, smiling wickedly, _finally_. She turned back around, stalking over to him, licking her lips. She ran her manicured fingers down his chest, "I'm your intern sir. Is there _anything_ I can do to make you feel better?" she asked, her voice purring as she grabbed hold of his tie. "Anything?"

Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed as the woman began to loosen his tie, throwing the silk over her shoulder. "Sir?" Her breath was warm against his cheek, her lips flush against his neck. "Please sir, let me _help_ you."

He smirked, closing his eyes, relishing in the feel of her manicured fingers running down his torso to his belt. She nipped his ear, "Sir?" Her voice was too shrill, he thought, fisting his hand in her hair. He yanked her head back roughly as his eyes opened, amber tinted red and unfocused. He cursed as he saw those brown doe eyes, those lush lips, that long, waterfall of midnight tresses. "You," he started, furious, his voice harsh, slamming her against the wall. "You," he snarled, ripping open her blouse. "Is _this_ what you want?" he hissed, his breath heavy and labored.

"Oh, yes," she moaned, "Oh. Fuck. Yes, sir," she mewled, latching her perfectly engineered lips onto his. _Finally, all of this could be mine. Nine months of putting up with the company's shit was finally going to be worth it._ She pushed him against the desk, removing her skirt in a seductive dance, swinging her voluptuous hips in a sensual rhythm. "Sir, I've been so bad," she murmured, unbuttoning his dress shirt with ease. "So bad," she whispered, licking the bottom of his ear, "You're going to have to punish me." She could see it now, their steamy love affair, the presents, the vacations; how she _ached_ to be his mistress.

Sesshomaru growled, gripping her wrists as he slammed her frame against the desk, her hip checking against the wood, "Sir!"

"You bitch," his tone was harsh, his vision hazy, his thoughts blurring. He saw those eyes, those chocolate eyes, haunting his vision. "Is _this_ what you want?" He hissed, ripping off her silk thong, "Do you like it rough?"

"Oh," the woman moaned from his manipulations, digging her manicured nails into his shoulders. _Lord, he's a fucking god_, she thought, unbuckling his belt, "Yes, sir," she purred, "More, oh," she whimpered, wrapping her bare legs around his waist. He smirked, pushing her down onto him, concentrating on the pleasure, her mouth, her tongue, but still, despite everything, _she_ remained.

_Maru._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin walked into the flower-shop, smiling in delight at the familiar sounds and smells.<p>

"Rin-chan!" Ayame exclaimed, dropping the empty flowerpots she had held onto the floor and ran towards her for a hug. "How are you feeling? What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be resting?"

Rin giggled, "I'm doing much better, thank you. I was getting sick of sitting in the house all alone so I decided to come here."

"All alone? Sesshomaru's already working eh?" Jakotsu asked, waltzing into the room.

Rin gave Ayame a look; only she knew all the details. "Yeah," her gaze flickered to the wooden floor, "You know him," she took a deep breath, gathering herself, before beaming up at Jakotsu, "He's a workaholic."

Jakotsu gave Rin a hug, "How are you doing sweetie?"

Rin flashed a sincere smile, snuggling into his arms, "Much better now that I'm with you," she joked, pulling back she pushed up the sleeves to her dress, "So what do you need me to do?"

"Nothing! Rin, the doctors said that you should be home resting, not here."

"Ayame, please," Rin pleaded, "Give me something to do. I'm dying of boredom," _I don't want to be alone anymore,_ "I can work up front! Do some deliveries! Anything. Please?" Rin pouted, giving Ayame those puppy dog eyes.

Ayame sighed, "Fine," she began, caving in, "One delivery," she handed Rin a small flower basket, "Tokyo General, third floor, oncology, room 189. Afterwards, you're going home and resting until the end of the week, ok?"

Rin grinned, "Yes ma'am." She pecked both their cheeks, "Consider it done! I'll see you guys soon!" She grabbed the basket eagerly and headed to her car, placing it delicately in the front seat. Tokyo General was a quick drive from the flower-shop, arriving in ten minutes.

"Oncology," Rin murmured to herself, walking around the third floor to the west wing, "Room 189." She paused in front of the door, knocking lightly on the wood. It took a moment before the door opened and revealed an elderly gentleman. "Ah, an angel, how delightful," he greeted, smiling, "What can I do for you my dear?"

Rin giggled, blushing, "Hello sir. I have flowers for a Mrs. Ito?"

"Ah, yes, my wife. Please do come in," he spoke genially as he held the door open for Rin.

"Thank you. Where shall I put these?" Rin asked softly, gazing upon the frail woman lying on the small bed. She was unconscious, a breathing tube and IV connected to her, a heart monitor beeping every three seconds.

"By her bed should be good, thank you," he took the card that Rin gave him, "Airi, we have some flowers!" He took his wife's hand, "They are from the Shouga's; you remember them don't you? They used to live next to us, ne?" He read the card to his wife slowly, caressing her hand as he did, "They are such a lovely couple."

Rin watched the tender moment, her eyes beginning to tear up. "Uhm, sir," she struggled to blink back the tears, the memories, "I'm terribly sorry to interrupt, but can I ask you to sign this?"

The man looked up from his wife, "Oh, yes, of course," he walked over to Rin and signed the clipboard. "Tell me darling, a lovely girl such as yourself must have a man waiting for her at home, ne?"

"Uhm," Rin hesitated, shaking her head, "No." _Not anymore._

"No?" The man was shocked, "Well my dear, you will find him soon. Come, sit," he patted the stool next to him, "May I tell you the story of my wife and I?"

"Of course," Rin sat next to him as he took his seat next to his wife's hospital bed, clasping her wrinkled hand.

"Airi and I met during the beginnings of the second world war," he handed Rin a picture of their wedding day, "She was a nurse and I had broken my leg during the first day of training." He shook his head with a small smile on his face. "She fell in love with the army uniform and I was lucky enough to be in it," he tucked his wife's white hair behind her ear, "Tell me, do you know what it is like to be in love?"

Rin bit her lip, _did she?_ "I don't know," she spoke quietly, her gaze on their intertwined hands.

The elder man turned to the younger woman and smiled, his eyes old and wise, "Do you still love him?"

Rin looked to him in shock, "What?"

He took Rin's hand and nodded in affirmation, "You still love him. My dear, love that strong doesn't fade. If you still love him, he will as well."

"But," she shook her head, confused. "How? How do you know?"

"I am but a sage," he joked, chuckling softly at her expression, "You have a tan line on your ring finger."

"Oh," Rin played with her hands, thinking of _him_, "But... what if he doesn't?"

The man patted her hand, "He'd be a fool not to."

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin found herself in front of a tall glass building; the architectural masterpiece that Sesshomaru had designed when he had first taken over as CEO of YK Takahashi. She was frozen, immobilized by the fear of having to face him, to hear the rejection for herself, but she had to know. She had to know why he had chosen her, why had he played with her heart, if he had ever felt anything for her.<p>

"You can do this Rin," she told herself repeatedly as she punched in the code to get to Sesshomaru's floor through his private elevator.

"I can't do this," she cursed as the doors opened to his floor, revealing an elegant office, stonewalls and large windows, the black wood furniture and accent pieces. She stepped out of the elevator, walking towards the curved desk, her skin prickling with goose bumps as the air-conditioned room bombarded her with cold air. "Hello?" she greeted, searching the room for his secretary. She glanced at the clock and cursed; it was noon, everyone was on their lunch break. She sighed, clutching her bag to her form. She had seen his Mercedes in the car lot so there was a chance that he was still in his office. _But did she dare to go?_

She peaked down the long hallway to the set of oak doors, finding it harder to breath. How many times had she eagerly ran to those doors to see him? _Countless._ _So stupid._ She cursed herself, "Come on Rin. Man up." It took five minutes for her to stand in front of those doors and with a deep exhale, she pushed the handle.

Rin gasped at the scene in front of her; Sesshomaru, his pants pushed to the floor, his shirt unbuttoned, untucked, and disheveled. And then the woman, her hair a silky red, her body toned, tanned, and completely nude, wrapped around _him_ like a vine.

She didn't dare move, dropping her bag onto the wood floor. Her voice wavered, it was as if she no longer had control of her body, "Sesshomaru?"

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru's eyes flickered to hers, <em>so she was here.<em> He smirked, allowing the woman to continue her ministrations. He saw the look on her face, how she stood paralyzed in shock, ignoring the wave of uneasiness, of guilt, "Rin."

The redheaded woman stopped what she was doing and turned around, "Oh! Ms. Rin!" She stood up abruptly, covering her breasts with her arm, "I'm so sorry, I," she stuttered her words, moving quickly to collect her things and redress. She bowed in front of Rin before she ran out of the room.

Rin refused to cry, watching the woman as she ran out, closing the door behind her. "How," she began, fisting her hands, "How long have you been cheating on me?"

Sesshomaru smirked, pulling on his belt, "Does it really matter? Our marriage will be terminated soon enough."

"You asshole!" Rin lost it, running towards him, "Why?" She slapped him, "Why did you do this to me? You could have had anyone! Anyone! Why me?" She pushed him away, sinking to her knees, the tears were uncontrollable now, "You bastard," she cursed, "I loved you," she whispered, furious with herself, "I loved you."

Sesshomaru snarled as he picked her up and threw her against the wall, "Love?" he hissed, grabbing her chin, forcing her to look at him, "Do you really think that I _loved_ you? How naive of you, Rin. How naive of you to think that you, a pathetic, orphaned, little girl, could ever be loved. You are nothing to me. _Nothing._ All you were was a business plan that I am in no longer need of."

Rin sobbed, "Let me go, let me go!" she kicked him, refusing to meet his gaze, "If you think I'm so pitiful why did you ever marry me?"

"Because marriage to you proved to be most fruitful," he refused to let go, his hold tightening around her wrists. His voice was smug as he spoke, "Did you know, _Rin_, that Takahashi stock are the most valuable of all of Japan?"

She cried out, "You sick, egotistical piece of shit," she thrashed against his hold on her, "You used me! You let me think that you loved me!"

Sesshomaru growled, slamming her even harder against the wall, "Love?" He hissed, "Again with this _love_. Tell me Rin, did I ever tell you that I loved you?"

Rin gasped, "You," her voice faltered, thinking back to all those moments, "You..." she swallowed painfully, _never_. Not once had she heard those three words fall from his lips.

Sesshomaru smirked, "You allowed yourself to fall head over heels for me Rin, all I did was play along. Do you know how _easy_ it is to make someone so naive, so stupid, so innocent, fall for me? A few kind words here and there, some baubles, a flower-shop and voila," he whispered harshly, "I've become CEO of the best architectural and construction firm of all of eastern Asia."

Rin burst into tears, slapping his cheek with all the force she could muster, "I hate you," she whispered, breaking free from his hold on her and ran from the office. She raced down the hall to the stairs where she nearly tripped over the first step. She cried as she continued onwards, finally breaking down on the 33rd floor. Rin whimpered as she laid her head in defeat against the cool concrete wall,_ I hate him so much_; her heart was constricting, finding it harder to breath._ How could he?_ Her fingers curled into fists as she whimpered, _why?_

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>xoxo<p>

tuille


	6. Chapter 6

chapter 6

by

tuille

disclaimer: not mine.

uni = stress = angsty author

* * *

><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

* * *

><p>Rin sniffed, trying to gain her composure. She reached for her tissue box in her purse only to curse her stupidity; she had left her bag in his office. She fumbled with the phone in her pocket, dialing Kouga's number.<p>

"Wolfe," his voice was gruff, annoyed by the disturbance to his train of thought.

Rin swallowed nervously, wiping away the tears that continued to fall, "Hey Kouga, it's Rin." Her voice was scratchy, she felt exhausted, both physically, and emotionally.

"Rin?" Kouga's tone was immediately lightened. "Everything ok?" He stood up from his desk, moving over to his filing cabinet to pick out a set of contracts.

"Um, I stopped by the office today." She didn't know if she dare give specifics, "I... I saw Sesshomaru." She began to play with the hem of her dress. "And I left my bag in his office. The annulment's in there, I just couldn't stand being there much longer." She felt sick to her stomach; _the thought of that intern, with that long red hair, perfect skin that glistened with sweat, and a body that would make any woman envious, wrapped around him, doing things with him._ She wrapped her arms around her knees, resting her head against the cool concrete. Kami, who knew how many other women there were. She could imagine them, _they would all be so beautiful. So tall. So elegant. So... not her._

Kouga stiffened, his hand hovered over his cup of coffee, "Yeah?"

"Could you," she sighed, her wallet, her keys, her camera were all in there, "Could you get it for me?"

"Of course. I'm on my way now. Where are you?"

Rin looked up at the nearest door, "Um, the thirty-third floor; staircase."

Kouga laughed, "Alright Rin, see you in a little bit."

"Thanks." Rin hung up the phone, hugging it to her chest. She wiped off the snot from her nose with the back of her hand, sniffling. She smiled softly as she read the SMS messages between her and Sesshomaru, _lies. All those "I miss you's", those flirty texts, those pet names, those mundane chats about anything and everything going on in their lives together, the comical comebacks, their inside jokes. Lies. _It hurt, the steak knife jaggedly cutting through her heart. In a matter of seconds she had lost her very own family. Growing up an orphan had been difficult, but the promises that those fairytales insisted were true; that prince charming would save her, that together they would live happily ever after had kept her optimistic that one day, she would have a family.

_Her very own family,_ she thought, her hand fisted tightly, _gone._

* * *

><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru watched Rin as she ran out, smirking as she did,<em> how pathetic,<em> he thought, thumbing his ring finger, _she let herself be ruled by her emotions. Utterly foolish._ His gaze fell to her photos, _utterly foolish._ He buttoned his shirt, his brow raising when he spotted her bag by the door. He picked it up, setting the leather satchel upon his desk.

"Interesting," he muttered, picking through the purse. A set of keys, a brown envelope, her wallet and her camera. First he took out her wallet, intrigued to see what luxuries he had allowed her. A black credit card, with the name Rin Takahashi written in gold, a bank card, also with her married name, her license, her medicare, and a couple twenties. He scoffed, throwing the wallet back in; _he would have to remember to cancel her cards._

He then picked up the camera, flicked it on, and began to flip through the photos. His stomach knotted as the first image flashed; it was of him and Rin on a balcony, facing the sunset. He was kissing her forehead, her face tucked in the crook of his neck. Ayame must have taken it secretly through the crack of the doors; commemorating their announcement of the pregnancy to their closest friends and family. _Charming_, he thought sarcastically, ignoring the tug on his heart. The second photo was of Rin lifting her shirt to show off her nearly non-existent baby bump as she stood sideways in front of a mirror. Sesshomaru growled; she was beaming, his hand resting on top of hers as he held out his hand to take the picture. _Ridiculous. It was all an act. He felt nothing for this... girl._

"Sesshomaru!" Kouga knocked on his door, "You in there?"

"Hn, yes," he took out the memory card, slipping it into his pocket, before returning the camera into the bag. "What do you need from me now Wolfe?"

Kouga pushed open the door, cursing as he did, taking in the destructive aura of the office. "What the hell happened in here?"

Sesshomaru smirked, settling in his seat, "The intern came in. We had," he thought back to the redhead, her tall, lithe body, wrapped around his own, "fun. It was a shame that woman interrupted."

Kouga's heart stopped; had Rin walked in on Sesshomaru? "Rin... she walked in on you?"

"Mm, she's much too sensitive don't you think?" Sesshomaru handed Kouga the brown envelope, "I believe this is all you need to make the annulment legitimate, hn?"

Kouga shook his head, "Actually, you've fucked up," _in more ways than one,_ "Your annulment case is out the window. You've cheated on her. If anything, Rin has the right now to call for a divorce and a share of half of your total equities."

Sesshomaru's eyes flared red, "That's ridiculous. File divorce papers if you must, but there is no way that girl is getting a cent from me. I'm sure there was a prenup, yes?"

Kouga laughed, "No. There was no prenup," _we never thought you'd need one._ "You just better hope she doesn't get a damn good lawyer."

Sesshomaru growled, "Even if she does, I pay you enough to be the best."

Kouga looked to his oldest friend, shaking his head in disbelief, "Money. It always comes down to money, doesn't it?"

Sesshomaru snarled, "What's your point Wolfe? Didn't you know that money makes the world go round? Didn't you know that I could go outside in the middle of five o'clock rush-hour, shoot nine people, pay every goddamn witness to never speak a word of it, and nobody would ever know anything? You're naive to think otherwise."

Kouga snorted, "You know, I almost went into non-profit law when you convinced me to become your lawyer for this company. You said we'd be fucking kings, and for a little while, we were. I fucked as hard as I worked, but I wasn't happy. I felt empty. But do you know what made me feel alive? What made me so goddamn happy to wake up in the morning?" He looked to Sesshomaru, who was impassive as always, "Being with Ayame. She changed me; I wasn't an asshole who just cared about money, fast cars and women. And I thought that when you met Rin, that you finally knew what I feel when I'm with Ayame. That fucking jolt of energy when she looks at you, that almost incessant need to make sure she's as happy as she can be, that overwhelming sense of comfort, security, and, jesus, the fucking love when you hold her in your arms."

Sesshomaru gave his friend a dry look, prompting Kouga to continue. "But I guess you didn't. Because it's still all about the money with you. Even if you hurt the only person in your life that loved you, not because of your wealth, your connections, or your status, but because of you."

Kouga cursed, gripping the top of the leather chair, "She loved you so goddamn much. Do you know how happy she was when she found out that she was pregnant?" He ran his hands through his hair, "She called Ayame at two in the morning, screaming so loudly, that I had to sleep on the couch downstairs while they talked for the rest of the night about baby names." Kouga turned around and began to walk out. "Look, I don't know if you don't actually remember or if you're choosing not to, but Rin was the one for you. And now, you're just royally fucking it all up."

Sesshomaru folded his arms, giving his friend a level look, "What I don't understand is how she managed to charm you into being her ally."

Kouga scoffed, pausing mid-stride, "She could charm a snake into being her best friend. You're just too fucking stubborn or blind to not see it." He turned to leave, walking towards the door.

Sesshomaru frowned, "Where are you going Wolfe?"

"Leaving. I don't know about you, but I've a wife to get home to. I've worked for nearly forty hours non-stop so don't be surprised if I don't come in for the next day or so."

Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed, his tone deadly, "You dare to be so lax in your conversation with your boss?"

Kouga glared, "Then fucking fire me." He slammed the door as he left, furious. _What a mess._ He rubbed his face, he was exhausted._ He needed sleep. He needed food. And most of all, he needed his wife._

* * *

><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

* * *

><p>"Sir?" A light knock came from his door, "Mr. Murasaki is here to see you."<p>

Sesshomaru frowned, glancing to his calendar; there were no appointments scheduled for the evening. _Then why was he here?_ "Very well, let him in."

"Hai," the secretary bowed, opening the door for Mr. Murasaki to come in.

"Ah, Sesshomaru!" The man was jovial, holding his hand for Sesshomaru to shake.

"Murasaki-sama," Sesshomaru shook his hand, "What brings you here?" Were they... friends?

"Ah, enough with these foolish formalities my boy," he gestured his hand grandly, "Please, do call me Fusao."

"Very well," Sesshomaru gestured for the man to take a seat, "What can I do for you, Fusao?" He added the name as an afterthought, his eyes darting to the fireplace.

Fusao smirked as he unbuttoned the top button his jacket, leaning in, "Tell me, is that lipstick on your collar Sesshomaru?"

Sesshomaru froze, fingering the white cotton, "Yes." He cleared his throat, trying to buy time, "Rin was here earlier."

The man laughed deeply, slapping his knee, "Marvelous! She's even more lovely than I thought. How is she faring, considering?"

Sesshomaru's eyes fell upon her pictures, "She's doing... well, thank you."

The man smiled softly, "Yes. The loss of a child is terribly difficult to get over, but it seems that you two are not in the least hesitant to try for another."

"Hn." Sesshomaru's gaze went cold, "I'm quite busy at the moment actually. I've a meeting in ten..."

Fusao waved his hands, "Nothing to worry about, I will be brief. I promise. I've come to personally invite yourself and of course Rin, to my villa; a corporate retreat of sorts. Since you and I will be doing perhaps the grandest business partnership Japan has ever seen, I thought it would be advisable to get to know one another on a multitude of levels."

"I see." Sesshomaru weighed his options, what could go wrong if he said no?

"Also, I'm not sure if you've recently entertained yourself to the local gossip, whether or not, I'm here to put it at rest. I'm getting older now Sesshomaru," the man leaned back in the comfort of the leather, "And with age comes new desires." He looked to Sesshomaru and chuckled at his confused expression, "What I'm trying to say is that I'm planning on stepping down as the president of my company, thus leaving my shoes to be filled. As you know, I have no children, no siblings, and I'm at a lost. I certainly could choose one of my many employees but it doesn't seem quite right. I want to hand my company over to someone who I can trust will do wonders, who has the charm, the intelligence, the backbone and tenacity of a man with a love of what he does." He smirked, fingering his gold Rolex, wondering if Sesshomaru had yet to come to the same conclusion, "You inspire confidence in me Sesshomaru; it is you who I would like to give my company to."

Sesshomaru was silent, figures running through his mind. Here was Fusao Murasaki, once his company's greatest rival, declaring that he wished to hand over his company to him. "Why?"

Fusao smiled, "You are everything I wish I was and had. Of course you have the intelligence, the determination, the desire for something great, but perhaps most of all, you have a heart. Your one weakness, your wife, is what makes you stronger. Do you know Japan has dubbed her Tokyo's darling?" He laughed, "Yes, Rin is perhaps your secret weapon. As charming as she is beautiful; she's delightful."

"Hn." Sesshomaru sipped his cold coffee, amber eyes narrowing, her.

The man smiled, getting up from his seat, "Nonetheless, I won't keep you from your meeting. I shall be seeing you next weekend, yes?"

"Yes, thank you," Sesshomaru shook the man's hand, leading him out of his office, "I'll have my secretary get in touch with the details."

"I will expect her call. Have a good day Sesshomaru, and please tell your wife I say hello."

"Of course." Sesshomaru closed his doors, fingering the SD card in his pocket. _Who exactly was this Rin?_

* * *

><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

* * *

><p>Rin opened the fridge, sighing at the bare contents. "Nothing," she murmured, pulling out a single juice box. She sat at the kitchen island, stabbing the straw through the silver hole. She kicked her feet back to and fro, her brown eyes darting out to the backyard. The sun was slowly rising, casting an orange sheen across the still wet grass.<p>

"Rin? Hello?"

Rin peaked up in her seat, turning her head to the dining room doors, "Kagome?" she got up from her seat, making her way to the front doors, "I'm in the kitchen. Well, not anymore. Just don't move."

Kagome called back out, "Ok! I'm by the front then."

Rin beamed as she spotted Kagome hanging up her peacoat, "Hello you!" She greeted, running to hug her.

"Hello, hello," Kagome stepped back, handing her a tray of cookies, "Hope you don't mind the early intrusion. I had to drive Shippo to school today, he spilt chocolate milk all over his school uniform during breakfast so I thought I'd stop by here before I headed to the hospital. Oh! And here, Shippo and I baked these last night. I thought you might want some."

Rin giggled, her eyes wandering over the haphazardly shaped cookies, pointing to the large one in the center of the pan, "Is this supposed to be a heart?"

Kagome pealed out in laughter, "Yes. I believe so. Anyways," she tucked a loose curl behind her ear, "How are you doing?"

Rin faltered in her step, "Ok."

"Rin?" she sighed, tucking her arm through the crook of Rin's elbow, "Come on. You need chocolate chip cookies and love."

Rin sat in the corner of the couch as Kagome rummaged through the kitchen cabinets for plates and cups. "Alright, sorry it took me a while, but I think I found your small plates," she set two dishes onto the coffee table, adding a cookie on each. "And voila, your food madame."

"Thanks," Rin smiled, nibbling on the chocolate chip goodness. "This is actually pretty great!"

Kagome snorted, "Yeah... that's because my mom helped me. But anyways, enough about my lack of cooking skills." She smiled softly, "How's my sister?"

Rin cast her eyes to the wood floor, tracing the grains with her gaze, "Miserable. I lost my baby," she murmured, "And I lost my husband, all in a blink of an eye."

Kagome hugged her close, "It's all going to be ok Rin. I promise."

Her chocolate eyes peaked up, filled to the brim with water, "We were going to have our babies together Kagome. They were going to be best friends." She sniffed, wiping her nose, "And maybe one of my kids would have fallen in love with Ayame's. And then one of your kids would have fallen in love with Sango's." She laughed at the thought, "And then we'd all be just one huge family. It was going to be perfect."

Kagome was silent, "It still will be. He's going to remember you and then everything's going to go back to the way it was."

Rin laughed bitterly, "Thanks, but I stopped being optimistic days ago." She chewed her lip, thinking back to the night before, "He was cheating on me Kagome," she whispered, drawing figures onto the suede couch.

Kagome froze, her cheerful countenance gone almost instantaneous, "Oh Rin," she soothed her friend as she clung to her as she cried, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I don't know what to say," she admitted truthfully, crying with her.

Rin cursed, "I'm sorry too. I know I shouldn't be crying over him... but, shit," she squeezed her eyes shut, "Kami. I walked in on him," her voice cracked, "His intern was with him, all gorgeous and naked. God," her hands fisted tight, angry with herself, "I should have known better."

"You know," Rin muttered bitterly, thanking Kagome for the wad of tissues, "The night I met him, after Ayame's wedding, I went to bed, hoping to never wake up from this dream. He was so perfect, he was everything I could have ever wanted or even imagined, and he wanted me. And everyday after that, I started to pray to never wakeup. Sometimes I'd try and stay awake when he was with me, to make sure that he wasn't going to puff away in a cloud of smoke, but he never did. I'd wake up, and he'd still be there. And then when I was pregnant, I stopped being too scared to go to bed. I forgot to think that this could have all been a dream. God," she curled her head up to her knees, "He never loved me."

Kagome licked her lips, "You don't know that," she murmured, "He... when I was growing up with Sesshomaru and Inuyasha, he was a dick. He was the asshole of assholes. He had hundreds of fangirls following him, and he, well, they both acted like they were kings. But something happened to him Rin; you happened to him. After that, he was still an asshole," she cracked a silly smile, "But when he was with you, it was like everything else didn't matter. He's just... I don't know. I saw the CT scans Rin, they did some extensive surgery. Who really knows what happened. Maybe he did use you, but, I want to believe that you guys had something real."

Rin shook her head, "I told him everyday that I loved him. It was stupid," her eyes watering at the memories, "It was stupid to think I could love him enough for the both of us."

"Rin, you don't know that he didn't love you."

She sniffed, wiping away the falling tears, "He never loved me. He never once told me that he loved me. Every time I told him he'd just smile, or laugh, or kiss my forehead, or my hand, but he'd never tell me. Because he didn't. He didn't love me. He used me," she threw the throw pillow at the wedding portrait over the fireplace, "It was a lie." _A lie. Everything. Every kiss. Every touch. A lie._

Kagome frowned, processing everything, the pair silent for a brief moment. "Do you think you'll ever move on?" she asked, her voice quiet.

Rin shook her head, "No. I don't think I can." She sighed, grabbing another cookie, "I gave him everything that I had and it wasn't enough. I wasn't enough." She felt the tears spill down again, "He was my rock. My prince charming. And now, now it's kinda like he died in that car crash too." She sighed, leaning into the brown suede, "It wouldn't be fair to some other guy, because I'd always be thinking of him."

Kagome nodded solemnly, "I get it." And she did. Because if the situation was reversed, and it was Inuyasha... her heart clenched at the mere thought. Her bag began to chirp, signaling a phone call. She peaked over to Rin as she answered it, "Hai. Yes, ok. I will be in momentarily. Thank you." She clasped the phone to her breasts, "I have to go. A patient just came in with a broken leg, again. I do believe it's his third in the last 2 years."

Rin giggled, "I get it doc'," she leaned in to hug her, "Thank you for keeping me company today."

"Of course, and if you ever feel the need, come over to bug Yasha and I. Kami only knows how happy Shippo'll be to know that Auntie Rin's coming over."

She nodded, her eyes landing on the small round of Kagome's belly, her chest constricting, "I will."

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Rin peered up at the brick building, shielding her eyes from the sun. She sighed, shifting her bag to her other shoulder; the weight of it causing her discomfort. She let out a shaky breath, pulling open the glass door to the brick building. She took the stairs to the fourth floor, taking the second door to her left.<p>

"Mrs. Takahashi!" The secretary exclaimed, jumping up from behind her desk to give Rin a quick hug and kiss on the cheek, "What brings you here?"

"Hi Yumi," Rin smiled, "I'm here to see Dr. Jinenji, I probably should have called but..."

Yumi waved her hand, "Nonsense. You've come at the perfect time. He's just finished up an appointment and the next one isn't scheduled for another hour so please, he's in his office. I'll just ring him and let him know that you're coming."

"Wonderful, thank you so much," Rin bowed, walking through to the end of the hall. She lightly knocked on the door, "Hello?" her soft voice lofted through the office, "Dr. Jinenji?"

"Rin!" Jinenji opened the door, his tall stature looming over her, "Come, come. Have a seat." He pulled out a chair for her, "Would you like some water?"

"I'm fine thanks," Rin folded her hands over her skirt, hesitating, "I probably should have called first."

Jinenji lifted a brow, "And what for?"

She chewed her lip, "I..." she trailed off, _she wanted to know. She needed to know._

"Rin?" Jinenji leaned forward, his tone genial, comforting. "What is it?"

"My baby," she whispered, repeating a mantra over and over in her head. _Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry._ "I'd like to know if it was a boy or girl."

He let out a deep breath, casting a look to his filing cabinet. He had received the test results the day of the accident. When he had arrived at the hospital, where he was met with the horrific sight of Rin's petite body bruised and bloodied, he had felt ill. He had called her only hours before with the promising news and then, there he was in the operating room, removing the fetus. "Are you certain?"

"Yes." _I can do this. I can do this._

"You don't wish to wait for Sesshomaru-sama?"

Rin wanted to laugh, _he never cared_, "It's fine." She murmured firmly, "I wanted to do this by myself."

"Very well," he walked over to retrieve the file, pulling out a magenta folder. He flipped to the last page, a yellow paper, with the results. He sat in the seat next to Rin, handing her the tissue box from his desk.

Rin giggled, thanking him as she pulled out a napkin.

He looked to the petite woman, "Are you ready?" Rin nodded, "Very well." He let out an exhale, placing his hand on top of hers, "It was a boy."

_A boy._ She felt her heart sink and shatter into a million little pieces; _a boy_. So he was right. She thought that if she knew the sex of the baby it would help, but if anything, it made it worse. She closed her eyes, letting her mind wander, wondering what he would have looked like...

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><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

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><p><em>Rin laid calmly on the examination table, the scent of cherry blossoms and hand sanitizer was oddly appealing. Next to her, Sesshomaru was slowly unraveling. His gaze flitted from the door to his wife, never once letting go of her hand. "Are you sure you don't want anything to drink?"<em>

_Rin giggled, shaking her head. "No, I'm fine." Ever since she had mentioned that she could be pregnant, he had been in a constant state of worry. He still refused to let her drive, hiring a driver and purchasing a bullet-proof Mercedes. "Come here," she held out her hands, grabbing hold of his cheeks, she kissed his lips softly. "You're so cute," she laughed, kissing his cheek, "I'm fine Maru. I don't even know if I'm pregnant for sure."_

_"Still," he brushed her hair to the side, "Better to be safe than sorry."_

_"Ah, sorry," Dr. Jinenji walked through the door, closing it behind him, "We're running a bit behind today. It's been hectic. Now," he pulled the chart from the table, "We have some good news for the both of you." He sat on the plush leather stool, "You are about one month pregnant." He smiled, "Congratulations."_

_Sesshomaru's hold on her hand tightened, "Pregnant." He looked at Rin incredulously, "Pregnant," he repeated. His wife, his tiny, little wife, was pregnant._

_Rin looked up at him worriedly, "Sesshomaru?" she cocked her head to the side, "Are you ok?"_

_"Hn," he placed his hand on her soft belly; their child was there. In her belly. Kami. He felt faint._

_Dr. Jinenji watched, highly amused by his behavior. "I believe Sesshomaru is experiencing what we obstetricians call BSS."_

_Rin's eyes widened, "Is that bad?"_

_Dr. Jinenji chuckled, "No, no. Baby shock syndrome. It's quite common amongst first-time fathers."_

_Rin laughed, sitting up to wrap her arms around her husband, "Are you happy?" she asked, kissing his chin._

_"Very," he murmured, tightening his hold on her. Suddenly, his arms went lax. No, he shouldn't touch her with so much force. She was pregnant! She was fragile. He turned to the doctor, holding out his hand to shake, "Thank you."_

_"Of course. I'll see you two in three weeks for your check up." He swiftly left the room, leaving the couple on their own._

_Rin moved to get down from the table when Sesshomaru scooped her up, placing her delicately on the floor. She giggled, "Thank you," she took his hand, which he held lightly, holding all doors open for her until they reached their car. He frowned as he held open the door to his luxurious silver coupe; it wouldn't do. No, he'd have to get a SUV. They were far more safe. Yes._

_Rin gave him a quizzical look, "Sesshomaru? Are you sure you're ok?"_

_"Yes," he bent down to brush his lips against her forehead before he shut her door. The drive to their penthouse was silent, Rin falling asleep as soon as he started the car. He frowned as he drove up into their parking spot, though they weren't going to live in the penthouse for much longer, he'd have to hurry the building of their house in Minato-ku. He looked over to his wife, his lips curling as he watched her sleep. He chuckled, brushing her hair from her face. She was so small. It was almost unnerving to think that she would have to give birth._

_Sesshomaru carried her to their bedroom when they arrived, laying her gently onto the silk sheets. He sighed, flicking on the lamp on the nightstand. The lights danced upon her ivory skin, her cheeks red-stained, her lips lush. "Beautiful," he murmured, kissing her hand before he left the room to retrieve a sketch pad from his office. He pulled up the chair from her vanity to the side of the bed and began to draw._

_Hours later, Rin awoke to the sounds of lead scratching against paper, the smudging of his long, elegant fingers against the page, and the rubber erasing lines and accidental smudges._

_"Sesshomaru?" Her voice was scratchy, breaking Sesshomaru from his trance._

_"Rin?" His gaze fell upon his wife, "You're awake," he noted. He handed her a glass of water from his side, "Drink. You're supposed to keep hydrated."_

_Rin smiled, thanking him. She took a long sip before she placed the glass on the night table. "What are you drawing?" she asked, tiptoeing next to him. Her breath hitched as she saw what he had drawn. It was of her, sleeping. Her hair was a tangled mess, a pair of pearl earring hung from her ears, but it was unmistakably her. But what caught her eye the most was the small baby snuggled into the crook of her neck, resting on her bosom. The baby was nude, chubby, and heart clenchingly adorable. Its eyes were closed, its chubby hands clutching her necklace. Her left hand, with her rings drawn to near perfection, rested on the baby's bottom._

_"Sesshomaru," her eyes were watering, "It's so beautiful."_

_"Mm?" He set the drawing on the nightstand, turning to face his wife. Without heels, she reached his chest, her head resting against his heart. "Rin, you're crying," he held her close, kissing her forehead._

_She sniffed, wiping her eyes, "I know, I'm a crybaby." She looked up at him, leaning up onto her tiptoes to kiss his lips. He groaned, yielding to her kisses. So soft. So... "No," he broke away, "We can't."_

_Rin pouted, "But... why? Is it because I'm chubby?" Her lip quivered, "Do you think I'm ugly?"_

_He chuckled, kissing her lips every so lightly, "Don't be ridiculous. It's just that..." he sighed, caressing her side, "You're pregnant Rin. The baby..." he trailed off, his eyes trained on her belly._

_Rin smiled, fully understanding,"Ah. My silly Maru." She stepped out of his embrace, grabbing her purse. She procured two pieces of paper from her wallet, handing them to him one by one. "Here. Read them."_

_He sighed, unfolding the first one. It was from Dr. Jinenji. "Mr. Takahashi. Intercourse with your wife is acceptable, in fact, encouraged while pregnant. As long as one remains cautious and comfortable, intercourse may continue right up until birth. Any questions, please do not hesitate to call my office."_

_Then Rin handed him the second piece of paper, with a silly smirk on her face. He rolled his eyes as he read it. "Sesshomaru, you idiot. Have sex with your wife. It's safe. Be creative, but no kinky SMS shit. Love your darling, DOCTOR brother."_

_He gave Rin a dry look, "Was that last one truly necessary?" he muttered, resting his chin atop of her head._

_She giggled, wrapping her arms around him, "Hai. Very. Now," she took his hand, leading him to the bed, "Come and make love to your darling wife."_

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><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

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><p>"Takehiko," she murmured, her eyes watering, imagining his chubby little fingers and toes, his tuff of silver hair, his pudgy cheeks. <em>Would he have had her eyes? Or his? Those heart-achingly piercing amber eyes. Kami<em>, she squeezed her hands into tight fists,_ it hurt._

Jinenji looked over at Rin, patting her hand sympathetically, "Mountain prince," he began softly, "Most fitting for a Takahashi."

She felt the lone tear drip down her cheek, "Hai, perfect." She clutched her stomach, she felt empty, alone, and as crazy as it was, despite the lies, the pain, all she wanted was him._ Sesshomaru._

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><p>..forgetmenot..<p> 


	7. Chapter 7

chapter 7

by

paizley

disclaimer: anything that you recognize does not belong to me.

just in case you're curious, this chapter is brought to you by the ever so lovely and mellow Angus & Julia Stone.

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><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

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><p>Sesshomaru paced in the conference room, the words of Murasaki running through his mind. <em>He wants to hand me his company on a golden platter. And what does he want in return? Nothing.<em> Exasperated, he flung himself into a chair, burning holes into the long bamboo table.

"Sesshomaru," his father walked in the room, his wife in tow.

Sesshomaru narrowed his eyes, "Father," he spat out, not acknowledging the woman's presence. "We have a... nuisance to take care of."

"Very well," Inutaisho took his seat at the other end of the table, folding his hands together in front of him, "Speak." Izayoi rested her hand on his shoulder comfortingly, averting her gaze from her step-son.

Sesshomaru sighed, playing with the SD card in his pocket, "Murasaki came in moments ago, to speak of the Ginza Project and future developments with his company." He trailed off, thinking of how to put his thoughts into words, "He wants to hand over his company into my possession."

Inutaisho sat in shock, silence blanketing the tension in the room. "I see," he coughed, clearing his throat, "And is there any particular reason?"

Sesshomaru growled, "That girl. He's for some reason taken with her."

Inutaisho leaned back into his chair, musing, "Well then Sesshomaru, ending your relationship with Rin wouldn't be best at the moment."

"I understand that."

Inutaisho sighed, "Sesshomaru, this is a billion dollar enterprise we are talking about. He is willingly handing it over to you, for nothing except the knowledge that you will be with Rin." He pinched the bridge of his nose, "I think then, for the time being, that you keep up your charade. At least a year, which will encompass the construction of the condominium and the changing over of ownership with his company."

Sesshomaru frowned; _keep up the charade..._

"No!" Izayoi stood up from her seat, enraged. "Inutaisho, how dare you even suggest something so horrendous," she berated, "Rin's been through enough." Tears were forming in her eyes, "You suggesting to put Rin through this is cruel. She doesn't deserve this treatment, least from you of all people."

Inutaisho sighed, "Izayoi," he rubbed her back in an attempt to soothe his wife, "It is not I who I am thinking about here. This joining of the two firms into one conglomerate will prove to be an unstoppable force. Think about the opportunities!"

Izayoi shook her head, "No. Don't do this to Rin," she pleaded, "Inutaisho, please, think for a moment."

"It is not a matter for you to decide," Sesshomaru retorted coolly, "Have her meet us here at seven. I will talk to Kouga and have a contract made for her to sign."

Izayoi wanted to slap her husband. Why wasn't he protesting? Kami, since when was he so insensitive? She blinked back the tears, "I'll do it."

The men gave her inquisitive looks, "I'll do it," she repeated, "I'll bring her here for seven."

"Fine," Sesshomaru left the room, leaving Inutaisho and Izayoi alone. She looked at her husband, both feelings of anger and confusion clouding her judgement.

"Izayoi." He stood up from his chair, "Izayoi."

She ignored his call, walking out of the room alone. She fingered her wedding band, sighing. _Greed_, she thought, changed men into monsters. She took the stairs to the entrance of the grand building, where a black limo sat by the curve at ready.

"Afternoon Mrs. Takahashi," the driver greeted, opening the door for her.

"Myoga," she nodded her head in greeting.

"Where to?" he asked.

Izayoi's gaze fell onto the sidewalk, "801 Shirokanedai, Minato-ku."

Myoga brightened, "Ah, visiting Ms. Rin! Very well, we will be there soon." He gently closed the door, leaving Izayoi alone with her thoughts.

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><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

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><p>Rin sat in the middle of the room, piling the clothes into a cardboard box. She folded each onesie carefully, ensuring that they would all fit into the box. She rolled her shoulders once she had finished, grabbing the tape next to her to close off the box.<p>

"Done," she murmured, standing up to look around the room. She had spent the rest of the day in the nursery; unassembled the crib, put the stuffed animals into boxes, and luged the rocking chair downstairs to the foyer. Now, the room was empty. _Empty. Bare. Desolate._ She chided herself when she felt the tears drip down her cheeks, "Stop crying Rin," she murmured, "That jerk doesn't deserve your tears." She rubbed her face, she was exhausted. She needed sleep, but it seemed to evade her.

"Love?"

A soft knock on the door startled Rin from her thoughts. She turned to face the door, smiling widely at the woman in front of her, "Izayoi," she greeted, crushing the older woman into a hug.

"Oh Rin," the woman hugged her tightly, "How are you doing?" she asked, pulling away to inspect her form. Rin's eyes were red and lackluster, her cheeks hollow, her body gaunt with exhaustion. "Rin, have you been eating?"

Rin shrugged, shaking her head, "Not really. When I do, nothing stays down."

Izayoi sighed, "Come, come, my dear," she took her hand, taking her down the flight of stairs to the kitchen, plopping her in front of the island. "I'm going to make you some soup and you're going to eat it all. Am I clear?"

Rin giggled, nodding her head, "Hai."

"Good," Izayoi distracted herself momentarily, preparing Rin's soup. When she finished, she placed the vegetable broth in front of the young woman, "Eat up," she ordered, taking the seat next to her.

"Mm, thank you. This is delicious." Rin slowly sipped the soup, casting a curious glance at the older woman, "What are you doing here so early Izayoi?" she beamed cheerfully, a happy facade donning her form, "Weren't you and Inutaisho-sama on vacation?"

"Yes," she patted Rin's hand, choosing her words carefully, "But we thought it necessary for our presence to be in Tokyo until this... predicament settles over."

Rin bit her lip, slouching against the leather seat, "So you know," she murmured, resting the spoon against the bowl.

"Yes," Izayoi pulled Rin in a hug, her heart breaking when she felt the tears spill from Rin's eyes.

"Why me?" Rin asked, gripping Izayoi closer, the perfume that was uniquely her comforting to her senses.

"Oh Rin," Izayoi tried to soothe her, "I'm so sorry."

Rin sniffed, pulling away, "I loved him," she told her, blowing her nose in a tissue, "I loved him." She whimpered, bringing her knees to her chest, "I loved him and it was all a lie," she cried, half aware of the sobs wracking her thin shoulders. "You know," she laughed bitterly, cursing her stupidity, her naivety. "I loved the way he'd get a line across his forehead when he'd concentrate on something; the way he sat like a king on his throne in his office; how he smirked when he was right and he knew it. I loved his laugh, his smile, how his hand always found mine, how, how he would catch my eye and take my breath away. And how he-" she wept, too distraught to continue.

"Oh Rin," Izayoi murmured quietly, running her hand through the girl's hair. Did she even dare to mention the meeting at seven?

Rin sighed, "It's not fair," she whispered; she had waited so long, dreamt of prince charming sweeping her off of her feet since she was a mere child, and then; her heart almost couldn't handle the pain. She hurt, her throat was raw, her stomach empty, stinging with acid, her chest ached. She gripped the armrest, "I'm sorry," she apologized, hanging her head, feeling ashamed.

"Don't apologize Rin," Izayoi licked her lips, finding herself incredibly parched. "Murasaki-sama came in today, to speak with Sesshomaru about another... business venture. Do you know anything about that?"

Rin shook her head, thinking back to the conversation she had with him weeks ago, "Vaguely; he said... he said that he trusted Sesshomaru even more after our meeting, but he didn't mention anything specifically."

Izayoi felt her chest constrict, her heart feeling heavy with every word she spoke, "I see."

Rin looked up at the older woman, her soft voice laced with concern, "What is it Izayoi?"

Izayoi refused to meet her gaze, _how cowardice,_ "Inutaisho and Sesshomaru request your presence at the office this evening... to speak about the business venture."

Rin was silent, _to be __in a room with Sesshomaru... could she handle it?_

"You don't have to agree to whatever they want you to do Rin, but..."

Rin bit her lip, "I'll do it."

Izayoi nodded; the answer unexpected. She looked to the clock, it read 5:49. "Very well, shower and get dressed. I will have a car service outside for 6:30."

"Hai," Rin glanced back at Izayoi, "Will you be there as well?"

"Yes," she patted the younger woman's hand, "And remember Rin, you don't have to agree to their whims."

Rin nodded, feeling the dull ache take over her body. It was automatic, the movements to the shower, to donning an airy black blouse and grey skinny jeans. She didn't apply makeup, simply blow-drying her hair and tying it into a neat ponytail. "I'm ready," she called out, meeting Izayoi in the foyer.

"After you," Izayoi murmured, holding the door open to the black SUV.

"Thanks," Rin replied, sitting stiffly against the white leather. She played with her ring finger, almost trying to rub away the tan line.

"We're here," Myoga announced, opening the doors of the vehicle.

"Arigato Myoga," Rin gave the man a small smile, her step faltering as her gaze set upon on the glass building.

"Come Rin," Izayoi took her by the elbow, gently leading her up to the elevator. "Now, I want you to know Rin, despite what happens tonight, I will always think of you as my daughter. Inutaisho and I will both continue to love you as our own."

Rin smiled, "Thank you." Her hands were shaking as they approached a set of black doors, which Jaken opened immediately after Izayoi had knocked.

"Mrs. Takahashi," he bowed to Izayoi, his eyes rested upon Rin, hesitating, "Miss Rin."

"You're late," a cold voice from across the room sent shivers down her spine.

"Gomen-nasai," she hung her head, her thoughts ablaze as she saw Sesshomaru, Inutaisho, Miroku and Kouga at the other end of the table. _So it's four against one._

"Rin," Inutaisho stood up, embracing the girl before she sat in the nearest seat to the door. "How are you?"

Rin wanted to scream, cry, runaway. She smiled meekly, "Fine, thank you." Her heart was beating tenfold as she peeked her eyes up to look at the other end of the table. Kouga was visibly upset, his tie loosened, the ends of his sleeves untucked and pushed up to his elbows. Miroku was dressed much more casually, donning a grey t-shirt and jeans. And then Sesshomaru; her heart tightened, noting how handsome he looked in his suit. _He always looked so good._ She bit her lip,_ no, stop! Stop thinking of him Rin. He never loved you._ She repeated that phrase over and over in her mind, _he never loved you._

"You must be wondering why you're here, yes?" Inutaisho began to speak, rousing Rin from her thoughts. She nodded, prompting Inutaisho to continue, "Very well, Murasaki came here earlier, with a proposal. In layman terms, he wants to unite our businesses Rin, under Sesshomaru's leadership."

Rin absorbed the information in silence before smiling politely, "That's wonderful." And it was; Murasaki & Co. had for long been one of the top construction firms in Asia: the unification of their firms would make them an unstoppable force.

"Yes, but that is where we come to a standstill." He looked over to his son, cursing his stupidity, "Murasaki is enchanted with you Rin. If not for you, he would never have even dared to hand over his company so easily. He seems to think highly of you, which is why a dissolution of your marriage to Sesshomaru at this time would be detrimental to this company's future."

Rin felt overwhelmed, finding it harder and harder to breath, "What do you propose?" she asked, not knowing if she wanted to know the answer.

This time Miroku spoke, "That your marriage continue, only publicly of course. For about a year, until the construction of the Ginza project is completed and Murasaki & Co. is under our control. After that time, we will spin a story, inconsolable differences, or in legal terms, irretrievable breakdown."

Rin clutched her fists, her knuckles turning white, she felt sick, weak. Her knees shaking, her hands trembling.

"After the divorce, you will receive 1.5% of Sesshomaru's total equities, all in a lump sum."

She looked over to Inutaisho, who was restraining himself from begging. This deal was a dream come true for him.

"Rin," Izayoi whispered, her voice calming, gentle, holding her hand atop of Rin's shoulders, "You don't have to say yes."

She bit the inside of her cheek, "I'll do it," she whispered, tears clouding her brown eyes._ At least this time, I'll be in on the lie._

"No! Rin," Izayoi fell to the seat beside her, gathering her hands in her own, "Rin. You don't have to do this." She could only imagine the emotional damage, the scars she would carry for the rest of her life.

"It's ok Izayoi-sama," Rin smiled softly, "I want to do this for you. For Inutaisho-sama, for everyone. It's the least I can do; you've all given me so much."

"Oh Rin," Izayoi broke down, feeling the tears spill onto her porcelain cheeks, "I'm sorry," she left the room, walking to the sitting area in front of the front desk.

"Izayoi," Inutaisho followed after her, calling her name through the hallway, "Please, darling."

"Go away," she muttered bitterly, sitting on the leather couch in the waiting area.

"Izayoi," he kneeled in front of her, "Izayoi. Please understand that this is not about hurting Rin. It's about the company. If there were any other way, I would take it. But there's not. If Murasaki found out about their divorce he would pull out of the Ginza project, leaving us in severe debt. We would have to cut costs, fire employees, men and women, with families to feed. We'd..."

"Stop," she held out her hand, "Your points are valid, yes, but I still can't help but feel disgusted with you at this point."

He sighed, running his hand through his silver hair, "Izayoi."

She shook her head, pushing away his hands. She walked to the elevator, looking back at her husband who looked like a lost puppy, still kneeling on the plush carpet. Her heart feeling heavy, confused, "Don't come home tonight," she spoke quietly, walking through the gold doors alone.

* * *

><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

* * *

><p>The room was dead quiet once Inutaisho left, leaving Rin shifting uncomfortably under the gaze of the three men in front of her. She played with her bracelet, a purple string braided with white that Sesshomaru had made her one rainy afternoon. Her mind wandered, her heart constricting as she remembered.<p>

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><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

* * *

><p><em>Sesshomaru leant against the leather couch, one arm wrapped around Rin while his other arm held up a contract.<em>

_"Maru?" Rin asked, glancing up at her husband, "Are you done yet?"_

_He chuckled, "No. I'm not." He looked over to Rin, internally laughing at her pouty demeanor, "And I do believe that's the eighth time you've asked me that."_

_She laughed, poking him playfully with her forefinger,"It's because you're taking sooooo long. I'm starving."_

_He raised his brow, taking note of the empty carton of Ben and Jerry's strewn across the living room table,"Didn't you just eat a bowl of ice-cream?"_

_"That's not food." She reminded him gently, "It's a snack." She held up her strings, "I mean look. I've made three of these puppies already."_

_He rolled his eyes,"Please. Tying two strings together is hardly considered to be a bracelet. Any simpleton could make one of those... things."_

_Rin snorted,"Oh, how high and mighty of you Mr. Lord Sesshomaru of YK Takahashi. Fine," she sat up in her seat, grinning, "If you think you can do better, then here," she stuck out her arm and held out her box of strings, "Make me one." She stuck out her tongue teasingly, "Unless you're too scared."_

_Sesshomaru arched his brow, accepting her challenge. "Very well then," he set his work down and selected a purple string, then a white one from the box, and knotted them together. He then wove them over one another, tying a perfect circle around her wrist. "There," he began, noting his handiwork, "Complete."_

_She laughed, running her fingers over the twisted twine,"Hate to break it to ya, but this sucks."_

_He growled playfully, pinning her back against the couch, "Care to repeat that?" he asked, his face dangerously close to hers._

_She stuck out her tongue,"Sure. Since you're so old, I guess you're hard of hearing." She smiled widely at him, enunciating each word slowly, "Your bracelet skills are the pits."_

_He chuckled, capturing her lips, his fingers finding the sides of her waist, "Once again, you have one last chance before I extract payment."_

_She giggled, squirming out of his grasp, "Never! Catch me then ya old geezer!" she squealed, running up the spiral staircase to the bedroom. She was quick, but Sesshomaru was infinitely faster, tackling her onto their king-sized bed in only a matter of seconds._

_"Damn your long legs," she muttered, blowing her bangs from her forehead. He smirked, unbuttoning his dress shirt with one hand, the other keeping Rin's hands hostage above her head. Rin watched as he shrugged out of the shirt, tossing it carelessly to the side, her heart beating wildly in her chest. She licked her lips in anticipation, "You would have been a great stripper," she murmured, moaning when she felt his lips fall briefly onto her neck. She whimpered as he tugged her dress up, "Shomaru, wait," her eyes fluttered open, her gaze falling upon his wondrous frame, "Didn't we have a dinner party thing?"_

_He groaned, collapsing next to her onto their silk sheets, "Fuck."_

_She giggled, curling into his side, "We could always skip it," she suggested, running her fingers over his abdomen._

_His hand captured hers, bringing it to his lips,"Very well. My dear Rin, I think you've fallen ill, and I, your ever devoted husband will spend his evening tending to each and every one of your needs."_

_She smiled widely, ducking down to press a kiss to his lips, "I don't think I've ever called in sick."_

_He smirked, rolling on top of her. He leant over to grab the phone, making a quick call to his secretary as he helped Rin dispose of her dress. "Yes, she's not feeling very well. Hn, yes. I will. Have a good evening." He tossed the phone onto the nightstand, his smirk widening at Rin's lustful countenance. "I do believe I will try my best to alleviate your ailment," he murmured against her lips._

_She grinned, "I love it when we play doctor."_

* * *

><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

* * *

><p><em>Stop it<em>, she chided herself, feeling the lone tears well up in the corner of her eyes, _stop thinking about him_.

She looked to Sesshomaru briefly, before her gaze settled onto the knot of his tie. "I- I agree to play along, but I don't want your money."

Sesshomaru stared back as if she grew another head, "That money," he snarled, "Is $35 million dollars."

"I don't want it." She retorted, eyes flaming with anger, "I never wanted your money," she whispered, wondering if he believed her.

"Very well," Kouga moved stiffly towards her, setting a contract in front of Rin. He handed her a pen, which she took and signed the paper without looking it over.

"So it's settled," Miroku stood up from his seat, breaking the tension, "Sesshomaru will continue to reside in the penthouse, while you may have the residence in Minato-ku. For the sake of publicity, you two will attend events, dinners, even dates, all of which I will inform and schedule for you. Murasaki-sama has requested the attendance of you both at his villa this weekend. I expect you both to be there and to act as if nothing has happened."

Rin nodded weakly, watching Sesshomaru rise from his seat to leave the room. Miroku left soon after bidding her adieu, leaving only her and Kouga in the room. She cast a look at Kouga, who was swirling his glass of scotch in his palm, "Kouga," she greeted gently, casting a smile in his direction.

"Why?" He asked, setting the glass on the table, "You didn't have to say yes Rin. Yes, they would have been upset, hell, maybe a couple of people would have been fired, but it's not worth it."

"Kouga," she ran to his side, wrapping her arms around his side, "I know," she murmured, "I could have said no. But, I couldn't. Why should my stupid feelings get in the way of their dream? A billion dollar deal," she sighed, "I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself, right?"

Kouga cursed, pulling her closer, "I hate them so much right now," he mumbled, tipping back the rest of his drink, "I'm sure this case has me turning into an alcoholic."

Rin giggled, "What would Ayame say?" she joked, tucking her head underneath his chin.

"Come on buttercup," he said, "You're staying with us tonight. I'm going to feed you ice-cream and let you and Ayame paint my nails and do my hair, so long as this fucking guilt goes away."

Rin laughed, stepping out of his embrace, "Deal," she held out her hand, smiling brightly as he shook it. They went to leave before Rin caught a flash of silver down the hall. "Just a minute," she murmured, "I'll meet you in the car lot in ten minutes."

Kouga nodded, "That's fine. I have to get a couple things from my office anyways."

Rin bit her lip as she walked down the hall alone, towards the man who was stood erect, warily eyeing her every move. She stopped in front of him, the hold on her heart tighter with each step. "Sesshomaru," she greeted politely, bowing her head.

Sesshomaru sneered, "Rin," he spat venomously.

She smiled politely, ignoring his harsh tone. She looked up, "You got a haircut," she murmured, noting the buzz cut that replaced his long, silver locks.

"Yes," his tone condescending, "The doctors thought it would be advisable during surgery."

_Hai, the accident._ Rin glanced to his left arm, hesitantly, she reached out, "Does it still hurt?" she asked; he no longer wore a sling. The scar on his face was healing quickly and if anything, it only added to his appeal.

"Don't touch me," he snarled, stepping back from her.

Rin ignored the pang in her heart, "Sesshomaru. This," she swallowed her fear, "this agreement would go a lot easier if you weren't disgusted by my very presence."

Sesshomaru growled, finding it harder to breath, looking down upon the girl, "Is that all?"

Rin let out a deep breath, her eyes brimming with tears. _Was that all?_ "No, no it's not. Can-" her voice cracked, tears welling up in her eyes, "Can you... lie to me, please?" Tears were falling freely, she looked up at him through long, wet lashes, "Lie to me." _Pathetic. Her request was pathetic, but those three words, even if it was a lie, would be enough._ She clutched the handle of her bag, "Please."

Sesshomaru looked down upon the girl, his thoughts betraying him. He understood her request, the gravity of it. Lie to me. He stepped forward, closing the gap between them, cupping her chin in his hand. He lifted it, his amber eyes watching as tears fell down her ivory cheeks. Instinctively, he brushed his thumb against her soft, luscious lips, daring himself to say it. _For control of an entire empire, he would say it._ "I love you," he told her, allowing himself a minute; a minute to memorize every plane and angle of her place.

* * *

><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

* * *

><p><em>Sesshomaru sipped his scotch, nodding, paying no attention to the man in front of him. Instead, his thoughts were on his wife, who was glaringly absent from the ballroom. "Excuse me for a moment Mr. Kim," he muttered, black italian leather eagerly walking away from the obsequious man and his irritating laugh. His gaze was cold as he scanned the room, with no sight of the young woman in the floor length Oscar de la Renta. He sighed, his thumb rubbing his wedding band.<em>

_"Where are you?" he muttered, stuffing his hands into his pockets, nodding to the familiar faces as he walked past. He paused mid-stride as he saw the pink chartreuse gown through the stained-glass windows. He strode to the doors leading towards the garden, watching as she wandered through the colorful flora. His lips curled as she stopped and began to pick sakura blossoms from the trees. His Rin._

_Sesshomaru slipped through the sliding doors, closing it with the back of his foot as he walked through. His footsteps were near silent, only sounds of the music inside and the orchestral hum of insects accompanying him. When he reached her his arms encircled her petite waist, bringing her form closer to his. She turned to face him, tears spilling slowly onto her rosy complexion, "Sesshomaru," she whimpered, feeling warm, feeling protected._

_"You're crying?" he asked, brushing the tears away with the back of his hand._

_"Happy tears," she assured him, leaning into his touch. She smiled, her countenance lighting up as she spoke,"Did I tell you how handsome you looked today?" she wondered, chocolate eyes beaming up at him with so much light, so much happiness, so much love._

_He chuckled, kissing her ring finger, "Almost as many times as I have told you how beautiful you are everyday," he replied, spinning her as they began to dance. Her silk chiffon gown flowed with her, her rose gold earrings gleaming in the moonlight. She was exquisite, he thought, his hold on her tightening._

_She giggled, her fingers curling over his, "I..." she hesitated, knowing she couldn't hold it in any longer, "I think I'm pregnant."_

_He halted his steps, frozen in shock, "What?"_

_"I think I'm pregnant," she repeated, the tears reappearing once more._

_"When?" he asked, his brows knitting together, his gaze falling upon her flat belly. He placed his hand there, "When did you find out?"_

_She bit her lip, "Today, when I was moving some stuff to the house. I noticed that I haven't had my period in two months since I haven't used any of my... feminine hygiene products," she giggled as she recounted her day, "So I asked Jaken to bring me a pregnancy test. He brought six boxes because he didn't know what kind to get. But in the end, it didn't really matter, they all ended up being positive," she whispered, burying her head against his chest._

_He held her close, feeling the tears leak through his cotton shirt, "Rin," he asked, worried, running his hands down her frame, "Are you sure that you're happy?"_

_She nodded, "Hai, very," she spoke softly, her heart nearly melting when she felt his lips press on top of her head. "I love you so much," she murmured, holding him close, "So much." It was a dream, she thought, a fantasy. How many days had she spent dreaming of this very moment, of the loving husband, the friends, the family. Countless._

_She sniffed, rubbing away the tears as they continued to fall. Eventually she pulled back, "I'm sorry," she apologized, giggling as she noted a black smudge on his lapel, "I ruined your suit with my mascara." She tried to rub the stain away but he caught her hands with his, bringing her to him once again._

_He kissed her hand, her ring finger, her nose, her forehead, then finally he took her lips. His eyes were open as he watched her eyes flutter with each kiss, each touch. "I love you," the words were faint, muffled, and lost within the wind._

* * *

><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

* * *

><p>He watched as the tears dripped down onto her ivory cheeks, feeling uneasy. <em>A lie,<em> he reminded himself, _it was all just a lie._ Immediately, molten amber turned cold as he walked away from her, fists clenched tightly. _A lie. He felt nothing for her. Nothing._

Meanwhile, she fell against the floor, her heart engulfed in a tight fist, shattering it into pieces.

_I love you_, the words replayed through Rin's mind throughout the rest of the night and haunted her in her dreams. She dreamt of him, dreamt of him whispering those words to her, dreamt of his kisses, his touches. She cried out, falling, falling, until everything became black.

* * *

><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

* * *

><p>"Sesshomaru." A voice called out his name, "Sesshomaru! Did you see that?" The camera turned to the woman in front of him, her eyes shining with delight as the night sky danced with colors. She squealed as another firework set off over the lake, taking his hand, dragging him closer to the water's edge.<p>

Sesshomaru laughed, "Rin, slow down. I'm going to drop this thing." She giggled, taking the camera from his hands, pointing it at his face, "Fine, I'll be the director." She turned her attention back to the fireworks, the camera however pointed down towards their feet.

Ten minutes later, the fireworks began to wane and a waltz had come on over the speakers. Sesshomaru smirked, turning to face Rin, "May I have this dance?" he asked, whispering into her ear.

She giggled, agreeing, balancing the camera on his shoulder with one hand as they danced to the song. "Tchaikovsky," she murmured sleepily, leaning her head against his warm chest.

"Indeed, Sleeping Beauty's waltz." He held her hand, bringing it to his lips, kissing her ring finger.

She smiled, the camera was facing her, the fireworks made for a beautiful backdrop as they swayed to and fro. "I love you," she murmured, snuggling into his chest. The camera fuzzed, the sounds cut off, before the screen went blank.

Sesshomaru sat frozen in his seat, his frown intensifying as he turned off the screen to his desktop. He walked away from his desk to the large bay windows overlooking the city. He fingered the rings in his pocket; his, then hers. _He would have to return them soon, they were to portray a happily married couple after all._ He sighed, glancing back to the screen. Though the screen was off, the video still played, voices emitting from the speakers.

"Rin," he started, "Why don't you tell our future son about why you're painting his room pink."

Rin laughed, "You mean our future daughter? Why, I think she'll love it!" She giggled, running across the room, "And it's going to match the stuffed giraffe your dad brought over last night."

"Hn," he heard the strokes of a paint roller onto the walls, "I still say we should keep it white until we are certain of the baby's gender."

Rin sighed dramatically, "Fine. Are you saying you don't trust my motherly instincts?"

Sesshomaru couldn't stand it, curiosity getting the best of him. He walked back, flicking on the screen.

The screen flashed alive, showing a brightly lit room. The camera faced Rin who was dressed in white painter overalls and a yellow t-shirt. Her feet were bare, her hair tied up in a messy bun. He heard himself laugh and pull her close, her breathing audible, "No, not at all." He kissed her neck, "We've just found out that you're pregnant Rin, the fact that we're painting this room already is a bit too soon don't you think?"

"Hm," Rin spun around, taking the camera from his grasps, "Fine," she danced with the camera, "I have a better idea for this paint then," she set the device on top of the dresser covered with white sheets. She grinned wickedly, throwing a thumbs up to the camera before whirling around, "This!" She flicked her paintbrush at him, pink flecks splattering onto his white shirt and his precious locks.

"Rin!" he roared, grabbing for her waist, but she dodged, continuing to splash paint onto his body. She laughed, running from his outstretched hands. He cornered her soon enough, his hands on either side of her, trapping her against the wall. She blew the bangs out of her eyes, a wicked smile on her lips as she looked up innocently.

"I concede?" She tipped her head to the side, giving him those puppy dog eyes.

He chuckled, "Surrender is futile," he murmured, taking her lips. He plundered greedily, grasping her waist, fingers clenched deeply against her soft skin. She moaned, winding her arms around his neck, him lifting her up to rest atop his pelvis. "Shomaru," she spoke faintly, pulling her head back, "Stop for a second."

"No," he replied gruffly, undoing her outfit. "Fuck," he cursed, frustrated, getting stuck on one of her buttons, "Why are you wearing overalls?"

She giggled, pushing his hands away, "Sesshomaru, the camera's still on." She pressed a quick kiss on his lips, before detaching herself from his grasp, "Do you really want to make a sex tape?" she joked, running towards the dresser.

"Hn?" He turned to face the camera, a red blinking light verifying Rin claim. "Very well," he watched Rin as she flicked it off while unbuttoning his shirt. Sesshomaru's frown intensified as he watched his trademark smirk and heard her laugh, before the picture turned black.

"Enough," Sesshomaru growled, grabbing the SD card from the slot, throwing it into his left drawer. He rubbed his face, collapsing into his chair._ He cared for her._ Impossible. But the videos; didn't action speak louder than words? He cursed, gripping his fist. He opened the bottle of painkillers, swallowing three before throwing it against the wall. The pain was returning; the headache. He groaned, leaning against the cool leather._ I love you_. He heard those words, running through his mind. Her soft, melodious voice;_ I love you._

"You loved her as well."

Sesshomaru jumped as his eyes focused on the woman in front of him. She was old, certainly, at least seventy, dressed in a white dress, her hair cut short. She wore blue sandals, and a gold chain hung delicately against her neck. "Who are you?" he hissed, his hand hovering over his phone.

The elderly woman smiled, cold hands patting his cheek affectionately, "Ah, you don't remember, do you?"

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><p>..forgetmenot..<p> 


	8. Chapter 8

chapter 8

by

tuille

disclaimer: i do not own inuyasha and co.

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru sat still as the older woman flitted forward. She wore a white floor-length dress with full length sleeves and a scoop neck. Her hair was equally as white, her face pale and wrinkled.<p>

"Who are you?" he repeated, a cold shiver running through his veins.

The woman smiled softly, wrinkles crinkling beneath her eyes, "You may call me Akemi."

He gripped the armrests, "Very well, Akemi," he hissed, hovering his hand over his phone, "Why are you in my office?"

She tutted, ignoring his question. She laid a hand on his shoulder, her eyes glancing back to the computer. She smiled; his display picture had yet to be changed. It was of Rin on their wedding day; she wore her dress, her back to the camera, but her face turned to the side as she danced in the meadow. She was smiling, holding a bouquet of purple orchids in her hand, the sun setting an orange hue over the sky. _She was breathtakingly beautiful in that moment._

"Why are you being so difficult?" She asked, her soft voice sending shivers down his spine. Immediately, she was to his left. She sat on his desk, regarding him with a faint smile, "You are so stubborn. Just like your grandfather."

Sesshomaru stilled, wary eyes watching her every move, "You knew my grandfather?"

"Hai," she fingered her necklace, remembering, "I was his wife."

Sesshomaru snorted, falling back into his chair, "He's had many."

Her heart constricted at his words, "Hai. He had." She stood up, "I was his first wife."

Sesshomaru frowned, _his first? Had not his grandmother been his first?_

"Yes," she murmured, "Your grandmother was his second wife."

He growled, fists clenched tight, "Who are you!"

She ignored him once more, "Come," she held out her hand, "I want to show you something."

Sesshomaru eyed her hand skeptically, "And if I don't?"

"Come," she replied. He sighed, placing his hand in hers. Then, there was a flash of white light, before he felt himself be thrown through the distance.

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p><em>"Your grandfather has passed away sir."<em>

_Sesshomaru sat, rooted to the same position, his hand clutched around the gold fountain pen. Jaken stood in front of him nervously, moving from side to side, "Sir?"_

_Sesshomaru's eyes darted to the impish man, disgusted by his presence, "Leave," he growled out._

_The man gasped, "Why, yes sir. Of course sir." Jaken bowed several times before he left the room._

_Alone, Sesshomaru laid his head against the back of his leather seat, fingering the pen between his forefinger and thumb. The feeling he held in his stomach was odd, the utter numbness he felt of the death of the sole man who had raised him when he was younger was mystifying. He should have felt pain for the man's death, or at the least some compassion, yet he felt empty, devoid of emotion._

_He smirked, setting the gold pen onto the cherrywood desk, is that not what his last entanglement had called him? A statue? He scoffed at the idea, he was far better looking than a statue._

_He stood up from the desk, straightening out his tie in front of his bathroom mirror, before opening those double doors to the world; it was time for the press conference._

_"Mr. Takahashi! Now that your grandfather has died you are now the CEO of Takahashi Reality. How does that make you feel?"_

_"Mr. Takahashi! Has your family since reconciled due to the death of the Takahashi patriarch?"_

_"Mr. Takahashi!"_

_"Mr. Takahashi!"_

_Later that night, as he walked into his desolate penthouse suite, he found himself in front of a small black framed photo, perched atop of his marble fireplace. It was of him and his grandfather, in front of a large set of doors. The younger Sesshomaru held a large pair of scissors, which was to cut a large red ribbon held by his grandfather. Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed, it was of their first of many building complexes they had built together._

_He sighed, that man in the picture was his idol. He had taken him in when his own father had left himself and his mother for another woman, throwing away his inheritance, his name in society, for some whore. And from that moment, that man had molded Sesshomaru into his younger counterpart; equally as charming as he was ruthless. _

_Sesshomaru's cellphone beeped, signaling to him a phone-call, most likely from an investor. He hesitated to answer it, picking up his blackberry with ease, yet his attention was focused on the photo. His eyes flickered to the name flashing on the screen, "Tao Yakamiro", one of the richest men in all of Japan. He pressed a button on his phone, simultaneously as he set the photo down onto it's front._

_"Takahashi. Yes, Yakamiro-sama, what can I do for you?"_

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p><em>Four days had passed since the death of his grandfather, four days of sincere apologies, condolences and endless streams of flowers.<em>

_"Sir," the driver glanced back in the rearview mirror, "We have arrived."_

_"Hn," Sesshomaru glanced through the tinted windows to the building. So they did. He buttoned his two-piece suit as he stepped out of the black Escalade, handing his blackberry to his bumbling assistant who was struggling to hold open the doors to the funeral home. "Forward all calls to my voicemail."_

_"Yes sir, of course sir," Jaken bowed his head as Sesshomaru passed through._

_"Ah, Mr. Takahashi I presume," greeted an elderly gentleman as he hobbled down a set of stairs. "You are just on time," he told the younger man, shaking his hand before leading him to a set of doors, "Please, after you."_

_"Hn," Sesshomaru pushed open the doors, finding himself alone in a large room. Sesshomaru frowned, glancing at his Rolex, "Am I early?"_

_The elderly man gasped, "No," he hesitated, "You are on time. The ceremony is to start in ten minutes."_

_"No one is here."_

_"Yes, um, they all send their condolences." The man gestured to the flowers that crowded the front of the room, "They were unable to attend."_

_Sesshomaru's eyes flickered to the black casket, "Very well."_

_"Please, have a seat. I am sure the rest are simply running late." The man bowed before leaving the room. Alone, Sesshomaru sat rigidly on the wooden seat. As his gaze fell upon the casket, his heart clenched; how odd._

_The sounds of the doors opening distracted Sesshomaru from his musings._

_"Sesshomaru," the man greeted, his wife and son in tow._

_Sesshomaru smirked, standing up to greet the man, "Father. I'm surprised you came."_

_Inutaisho stiffened, showing his wife to her seat, "I thought that was behind us now Sesshomaru," he spoke, his voice calm and soothing._

_Sesshomaru scoffed, "And I see you brought your, family. Lovely."_

_"Yeah, because I surely as hell want to be here," Inuyasha retorted, folding his arms as he flopped onto the seat._

_"Well then why don't you leave. Your presence alone is making me ill."_

_Inutaisho growled, "Do not make this day hostile son."_

_Sesshomaru rolled his eyes, sitting back down in his seat, "Do what you please, but you have no say over my life."_

_Inutaisho stood up to talk to his son but was stopped by Izayoi who gave him a pointed look. Inutaisho sighed and took his seat. The foursome sat in silence until five minutes later, when an elderly woman walked into the room. Sesshomaru raised a brow as he watched her walk down the aisle, taking a seat in the middle row. She had to be in her mid-seventies, her hair a snow-white, her face wrinkled with age. She wore a black dress and shoes, the sole piece of jewelry on her body a necklace. She folded her hands over one another, bowing her head in respect._

_Just then, the priest came in, turning Sesshomaru's attention away from the woman. He began the ceremony, opening with the eulogy. It was more than twenty minutes later when the ceremony ended, and Inutaisho and his family left, leaving Sesshomaru and the older woman in the room._

_Sesshomaru sat in his seat, his face impassive. The elderly woman shuffled into his view, placing a bare hand onto his face._

_"You look so much like him," she murmured, smiling as his eyes shifted to scrutinize her face._

_"Who are you?" He growled, pushing her off of him._

_The woman simply smiled, turning away to face the casket, "You are so much like him. Did you know that your grandfather looked exactly like you when he was younger?"_

_Sesshomaru paused, "You knew my grandfather?"_

_The woman once again dodged his question, "Your grandfather was an odd man. Did you know that he despised doing the dishes?" She laughed, "It would dry his hands, that's what he told me anyways." She looked to the younger man, "Tell me, did he still take his coffee with two creams and two sugars?"_

_Sesshomaru was silent, uncertain of the woman's mental health, "Who are you?" he asked once again, this time, his tone harsh and demanding._

_The woman faltered in her step, "Of course," she murmured, "My apologies." She held out her hand, "Akemi Gato, I," she looked towards the casket, "I was your grandfather's first wife."_

_Sesshomaru was shocked, "Pardon?"_

_She smiled softly, "His first wife. Before he married your grandmother, Kumiko, was it not?"_

_"My grandfather has had many wives," Sesshomaru retorted, "It is not up to me to keep track of them."_

_The woman stood stiff, how odd that his statement had stung so much after such a long time, "Yes. Yes he did." She looked away, clutching her necklace to her breasts._

_"Tell me, Sesshomaru isn't it?"_

_"Hn."_

_"Do you have someone to love?"_

_Sesshomaru was shocked by her bold statement, "Don't be ridiculous. Love is nothing but a fabrication of society to make ones with nothing feel as though they have something to be proud of."_

_The woman laughed, delighted, "Oh, you are so much like him." She looked towards him, her brown eyes so expressive, "Did you ever ask yourself why no one bothered to attend this funeral service?"_

_He paused, "They were busy."_

_She raised a brow, "Everyone of them?"_

_Sesshomaru snarled, "My grandfather was a respected and wealthy businessman,"_

_He was interrupted by the woman, "Your grandfather was cruel and unwavering in his lust for money and power. He was not respected Sesshomaru, no, he was intimidating, a bully in a three-piece suit."_

_Sesshomaru snarled, "You only say this because he left you for my grandmother."_

_"I say this because you are going to be like him if you don't grow up." She took his hand and gestured to the room, "Your grandfather knew so many people. So many dignitaries, countless people who worked with him, even his seven wives, yet only five people bothered to show up. Yourself, your father, step-mother, step-brother and myself. Do you not see it? Your grandfather was not who you idolized him to be. He was a selfish, manipulative old man, bent on owning all of Japan if he could."_

_Sesshomaru growled, "You dare to say that about your former husband?"_

_The woman sighed, "Come." She walked to the doors, motioning for Sesshomaru to follow her. Sesshomaru watched the woman cautiously, he should have left, he should have walked out of the funeral home and back to the office yet he followed her into another room, this time, packed to the brim with people. He sat next to her in the back aisle, "What is this?"_

_"A funeral service," she patted his knee, "Listen."_

_The same priest from moments before stood before the room, beginning the ceremony with a prayer and followed by his sermon. "And now, I call upon his dear friend Takumi Yamamura, to say a few words."_

_Takumi walked up, clutching a cue-card to his lapel, "Thank you. For all those who have known Kiyoshi, know that he was a gentle man, with a loving and pure heart. He loved his family very much, especially his wife, Yuna, and his son, Isamu. We also know of course, his love for golf, spending more time at the course then with his lovely wife._

_I remember when I first met Kiyoshi, it was on the first day of kindergarden, and he had sat by me during math class. Kiyoshi was, I found out, horrible at math, but it was ok, since we had a deal. He would copy me on the math tests and I would eat his snacks that his mother would pack him." The room laughed lightly, "But it was in third grade, when I learned the extent of our friendship. It was mid-fall and he had found me in the corner of the school room with a bloody nose. He demanded to know how I received it, then proceeded to beat up the boy who had beat me up, giving him more than just a bloody nose." The man smiled, "He was very loyal."_

_"I also remember once when Kiyoshi told me he met a girl who stole his heart. Being his best friend I must admit I was rather shocked and thought evil things about that girl. Of course as you all know, I am referring to Yuna. I was so envious of Yuna. It was not because I'm in love with Yuna, but it's more of I was simply not used to sharing Kiyoshi's time with anyone else. It was always me and Kiyoshi. However, when I met Yuna, I didn't know how I would react. Yuna turned out to be a really nice person and she ended up being a good friend of mine too. I must say, I was happy for Kiyoshi and Yuna._

_Kiyoshi's death was sudden. I remember when I heard the news I simply could not believe it. Kiyoshi was too young but as it slowly occurred to me I have realized that Kiyoshi indeed lived his life wonderfully. Kiyoshi was well-loved and he had done so many things on earth and I'm sure he'll do much more in heaven. I will forever be grateful to have known Kiyoshi. I will forever be grateful for spending 30 years of my life with a friend like him. All the memories I have shared with him will forever be cherished and remembered. Kiyoshi will forever live in my heart… In our hearts."_

_He handed the mic back to the priest, "And now, his son, Isamu would like to say a few words." A tall, lanky man in a black dress shirt came to the front, his moppy brown hair styled with gel._

_"Thank you. My father was a man that was kind and generous. He loved all of us with such joy and pride that it lit up his face every time we were together. There was never a time that I could not talk to him, or that he would not offer advice, asked for or not." He gave an exaggerated pointed look, causing laughter from the guests, "Some of you may not have known my father the way that I did, but for those who did not get to see this side of him missed out on knowing a great man. A man that made sure that his family was taken care of, even if it meant he had to sacrifice something important to him. So pops, wherever you may be right now, I know that you're looking down at me and I'm going to do my best to make you proud."_

_"Thank you." The priest took rein of the microphone as the son took his seat, "When someone who has lived a long and fulfilled life dies, it's befitting and appropriate that we should give thanks for, and celebrate their life. Kiyoshi was always a happy, contented man who never wanted much out of life, just simple, quiet pleasures, sharing his life with his beloved Yuna and his son Isamu. Kiyoshi was a very sociable person who had many friends, he was well-liked and respected, he was someone you could trust and rely on, someone you could confide in and ask for advice. Someone we have all had the great privilege of knowing. "We must die we know" said a character in Shakespeare, "tis but the time and drawing days out that men stand upon". Kiyoshi died early evening of last Tuesday, and I know he will be greatly missed by everyone who knew and loved him."_

_Sesshomaru turned to the woman when the service was over and everyone filed out the room, leaving just Sesshomaru and the woman. She touched his cheek gently, before he felt the room blur, and a tug on his chest._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p><em>"Please, Mr. Takahashi, follow me," the wedding planner turned her heels, walking through a long, mirrored hallway. "The groom should be in to meet with you momentarily," she held open the door, revealing a luxurious greenhouse that was being transformed into the wedding space. Chairs lined the aisle, bouquets of purple tulips strategically placed every few meters. White lanterns hung from the ceiling, and candles encased in glass dangled from the branches of the willow tree in the front of the room.<em>

_"No!" A hushed exclamation of frustration came from behind him. Sesshomaru turned, his lips quirking at the sight of a girl on her tiptoes, standing at the top of the last rung of the ladder, but not yet reaching the ceiling._

_"Do you need help?"_

_The girl gasped, shocked to hear another voice when she had assumed she was alone in the room. She spun to face him, her footing on the step slipped and she began to fall. She shrieked in fear, expecting the worse. But instead she found herself starring up into dark amber eyes, her petite form secure in his arms. "I..." she trailed off, finding her breath taken away by his presence._

_Sesshomaru quirked a brow, the girl in his arms was really quite small. He frowned as he observed a swimming of emotions through her large, doe eyes. "Are you alright?" he asked, his voice was deep and smooth._

_She nodded, not trusting her ability to speak. He studied her, only out of curiosity, or so he told himself. Her skin was porcelain, her nose small, and delicate. Her cheeks were dusted rose, her lips, lush and a vibrant red. But oddly, he noted, there was barely a hint of make-up. Her lashes were long, masking those brown eyes he found so enchanting. He frowned once more, enchanting? She was a girl._

_"How old are you?" he asked, his voice cold. _

_She stuttered, not expecting his question, "Um, 22."_

_22, he was unsure whether to be pleased by the flood of relief her answer brought forth. 22..._

_"Um," she squirmed in his arms, the continued contact making her uneasy, "Could you put me down, please?"_

_"Hn," he set her down, her legs shaking as she placed her heeled feet firmly on the ground._

_"Thank you," she murmured, bowing her head, not daring to look up at him, "For saving me."_

_"Hn," he was about to continue when Kouga walked into the room, his baritone echoing through the glass building._

_"Sesshomaru! Buddy, there you are," he clasped Sesshomaru on the back, "This week's been crazy. But I'm glad you made it back in time," he turned to Rin, "How goes the decorating?" he asked, shooting Rin a silly grin._

_She laughed, "Not well." She shook her head at the ladder, "Not well at all. I think I need to wait for Jak to get here to finish the ceiling. I'll stick to the ground-level."_

_"Heh, could have told you that myself missy," he tapped her on the nose, wrapping an arm around her shoulder. Sesshomaru found himself envious of his friend's current position with the girl, a feeling of jealousy bubbling through when she kissed his cheek. Hell, what was wrong with him? He didn't even know her name._

_"Anyways," Kouga unhooked his arm from around her waist, "Guess I oughta be the ever gracious host and introduce you two properly. Sesshomaru, this is Rin, Ayame's maid of honor and my honorary little sister. Rin, this is Sesshomaru, my best man and oldest friend."_

_Rin blushed as she shook his hand, "It's nice to meet you Sesshomaru."_

_Sesshomaru, he smirked, he liked the way it rolled off her tongue. "Likewise, Rin."_

_"Come on, we'll leave little Rin to her flowers." He laughed, fluffing her hair affectionately, "I have some gin up in the parlor." He strutted out of the room, leaving Sesshomaru staring at the girl in front of him._

_Inexplicably, he felt drawn to her like a moth to a flame. He stepped closer, smirking as he watched her pupils dilate, her subconscious lick of her lips. He took her left hand, pressing a kiss to it, "Save a dance for me tonight."_

_She nodded her head, watching him as he left the room. She let out a deep breath the moment the doors to the greenroom closed, squealing, "Oh my gosh!"_

_Just centimeters from the door, Sesshomaru paused. He had heard her squeal. He tucked his hands into his pockets, walking to the parlor, a satisfied smirk played on his face for the rest of the day._

_Then, the edges began to blur, a bright line shone, and once again he felt himself thrown to another time._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p><em>Sesshomaru set his flute of champagne onto the table, his gaze following the young woman in the peach dress. He watched as she laughed and danced, her movements soft, and free. She now held a young boy in her arms, watching over him as his parents danced a waltz. His long, elegant fingers tapped the glass table, musing, wondering if anyone had ever held his attention as much as she.<em>

_"Ladies and gentlemen, the last slow song of the night..."_

_Sesshomaru glanced as his watch, cursing as he noted the time. It was nearly midnight; had he really wasted so much time sitting in his chair? He sighed, getting up, striding confidently towards the young woman. His brow raised as another man neared her, disdain clearly etched on his marble countenance. The other man faltered in his step, hastily retreating from the prize. Sesshomaru smirked, his arms encircling her small waist. "I believe you owe me a dance," he murmured, turning her to face him._

_Her doe eyes were wide, "Sesshomaru," she murmured, ivory cheeks tainted red. She smiled, "You changed your suit," she noted, lifting her hand to set atop of his shoulder._

_He chuckled, grasping her small hand in his, "As did you." His eyes trailed her petite form, secure in a peach, pleated one shoulder dress, "You look beautiful."_

_She bit her lip, ducking her head bashfully, "Thank you." They swayed in unison, Sesshomaru noting how perfectly she fit in his arms. "This is my favorite song," she whispered, peaking up to stare at his flawless visage._

_"Coldplay," he remarked, "It's a classic."_

_"I know right!" Her eyes brightened, "It's the best!" She laughed, "I know it's silly but wouldn't this be the best first dance song ever? I can totally picture it. Imagine a garden with white tulips, and fairy lights! Oh and tea-lights!" She giggled, shaking her head, "I should really shut up. It's a problem. Once I get started on flowers I can go on for days."_

_"Nonsense," his hold on her tightened, "You're delightful."_

_She was without words, blushing, "Um... thank you." She closed her eyes briefly, her pulse erratic, "So... what does Sesshomaru do for a living?"_

_"Real-estate." His answer was swift, "What does Rin do?"_

_"Florist. I work with Ayame. We just recently convinced the owner of the flower shop to do big events like weddings, so this was our first test run I guess." She looked around the room, grinning, "I think it was a success."_

_He nodded, "All of those arrangements are your creations?"_

_"Yeah. It took forever but it was totally worth it. Ayame loved them, she almost cried, then I almost cried and we were almost a pathetic sobbing mess of tulle and mascara." She laughed, "I'm sorry," she apologized, "I keep on going on these really weird tangents, you're probably bored out of your mind right now."_

_"Not at all." Regrettably his hold on her slacked as the song ended, "May I," he was however, interrupted by the DJ._

_"And now, can I get all of the single ladies lined up to the front? The bride is ready to throw her bouquet!"_

_Rin grinned, glancing behind her shoulder at the mass of women gathering in front of the stage, "That's me." She bit her lip, hesitating, before bouncing up quickly to place a soft kiss on his cheek, "Thank you for asking me to dance." She gathered her gown, waving her fingers as she ran up to the crowd._

_Sesshomaru stood motionless, in near shock._

_"You're playing with fire," a man noted, walking next to Sesshomaru._

_"Hn?" Sesshomaru turned his head to the right, taking note of his friend of almost two decades._

_Kouga glared back, "Rin's not the type of girl that you can just hit and run. But if you do, I'll kill you. Hell, all the men in this room will massacre you."_

_Sesshomaru raised his brows, "Do you really care for her that much?"_

_"Yeah." He shrugged, "Like I said, she's my honorary little sister. Why else do you think you've never met her before?"_

_Sesshomaru knit his brows, "You were hiding her from me?" he asked, feeling slightly offended._

_"Yeah." Kouga's tone was stern as he continued, "So exactly what are your intentions with Rin?"_

_Sesshomaru was silent, watching as the bouquet of purple lilies flew in an arc and landed in the very hands of the young woman he found so enchanting. He smirked as their eyes locked, chocolate on amber, "I intend on marrying her."_

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p><em>Rin held his hand as they walked through the garden, her heart beating tenfold as she thought of what to say next. It was three months into their relationship, and she felt herself falling more and more each and everyday. She peeked up at Sesshomaru, blushing as he caught her.<em>

_"Are you alright?" he asked, pressing a kiss to the top of her head._

_She nodded, "I'm fine."_

_"Very well," he stopped walking, wrapping his arm around her waist. "Close your eyes," he murmured, brushing his lips against her eyelids._

_Rin giggled, "Ok." She shut her eyes, waiting in silence._

_Sesshomaru smirked, signaling to the gardener to turn on the lights. "Alright you can open them."_

_Rin gasped as she opened her eyes, looking around the garden. It glittered with fairy lights, lanterns and candles. "Sesshomaru, this is beautiful," she broke away from his grasp, running to the centre of the garden. She laughed, kicking off her heels, twirling with delight._

_As Sesshomaru watched, a small lift came about his well-formed mouth and amusement shone from his dark-honeyed eyes. He walked over to grab an orchid, playing with the stem as he moved closer to her. She smiled as he stood in front of her, "Thank you," she murmured, resting her head against his chest, "Today was amazing."_

_"Hn," he lifted her chin, gazing into those chocolate eyes. He placed the flower into her hair, pressing a soft, promising kiss onto her lips. Rin was breathless when he pulled away, "Sesshomaru," she wrapped her arms around his neck, "I think I'm falling in love with you," she whispered in his ear, blinking away her tears._

_He tightened his hold on her, _I love you_. He kissed her forehead, her nose, her cheeks, her lips, _I love you_. And then, everything became hazy._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru looked up at the woman, who was smiling patiently next to him. He took in his surroundings, he was back in his office. Those memories, whatever they were, were unsettling. "What was that?"<p>

She shrugged, "I simply helped you remember."

He snarled, gripping the armrests tight, "Why?"

"Simple. You still have time to right his wrongs. You can become a good man, someone, who when he dies, is surrounded by those who love him."

Sesshomaru's lips curled with disgust, "Why do you care so much for a man who left you for someone else?"

The woman teared up, "Because I loved him," she answered, her voice unwavering with her confession.

Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed, "Yet he did not love you back."

The woman looked down, "He did." _He did._ "Did you know that your grandfather had an older brother?" Sesshomaru shook his head. The woman continued, "Your grandfather was not the heir to the Takahashi business, it was his older brother, who had a wife and a young son long before your grandfather and I had married. Your grandfather's parents disapproved of me; I was a classmate of his, on scholarship, with only an elderly grandmother left as family. But I loved him, and he loved me, so we married. It was only two months into our marriage when your grandfather's older brother and his family had died in a plane crash, leaving your grandfather to talk helm of the Takahashi empire. Three months later, he ended our marriage. He was a different man after those three months, he was cold, and cruel, nothing like the man I married. Money had changed him into a man of warmth, passion and feeling, to a stone cold liar."

"So tell me Sesshomaru," she stood up from her seat, her image slowly dissipating, "Do you have someone to love?"

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Later that night, Sesshomaru sat at his desk, drinking another glass of scotch. He thought back to the funeral; his grandfather, his idol, a wealthy, highly sought-after businessman, had a funeral party of solely five, while a simple accountant, middle-income, wife and son, had a funeral party of more than one hundred people. He sighed and downed the drink, his eyelids getting heavier and heavier.<p>

_Do you have someone to love?_

He laughed bitterly, someone to love? All the women in his life were after one thing and one thing only; his wealth. No, he thought, bringing his hands to his face, he did not have someone to love. The women of his past relationships were looking only to upgrade their social rank by being with him and he was more than happy to oblige. And once they became too clingy, too needy, he would simply move onto the next woman to satisfy his needs.

_Do you think your grandfather was happy?_

He reflected upon his grandfather's life, his various wives, countless affairs, yet only one son, which he disowned as soon as he married that woman. But was he happy? His grandfather had managed to make the Takahashi name infamous, becoming one of the wealthiest men of all of Asia. He had money, he had power, yet, the fake smiles and boisterous laughs at all the charity functions, in front of the cameras and the investors, were simply a facade. He wasn't happy.

_Are you happy?_

Sesshomaru scoffed, sliding against the cool leather. He was Sesshomaru Takahashi, wealthy and prominent businessman, CEO of YK Takahashi, one of the richest men in all of Japan. But was he happy? He curled his lip in disgust, no, he was not happy. He was... satisfied with his life.

_Do you have someone to love?_

Immediately his thoughts fell to Rin. He clutched his head, starring into those brown eyes on his desktop. "She's nothing to me," he told himself, "Nothing."

_I love you._ He could hear her melodious voice, her laughter, her whispers. He closed his eyes, seeing her. He gripped the edge of his armrest, "She's nothing. She's worthless. She's... fuck!" He clutched his forehead, images of her bombarding his mind. "She's nothing," he muttered it like a mantra. He didn't need love. He didn't need _her_.

_I love you._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p> 


	9. Chapter 9

chapter 9

by

tuille

disclaimer: inuyasha and co. are not mine.

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><p><em>happy new year folks! thanks for reading and hopefully you've all had wonderful holidays so far :)<em>

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin sat on the velvet settee in the center of their walk-in closet, kicking her feet to and fro as her chestnut eyes wandered over the various pieces of clothing. <em>His<em> side was color coordinated and organized from suits to shirts, then pants and two pairs of dark wash jeans. Her side was a colorful array, a combination of second-hand and vintage clothing, mixed with the designer labels that _he_ spoiled her with.

Her eyes then landed on a large white clothing bag, tucked in the corner of her side. Her heart squeezed tight in recognition; it was her wedding dress._ Kami. Don't cry Rin. It's just a dress._ She stood up slowly, walking towards it, memories from that day flittering about her thoughts. _It's just a dress._

* * *

><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

* * *

><p><em>Rin brushed her hair in the full-length mirror, starring at the person who looked back. A professional make-up artist had finished moments before, leaving a stranger behind. Her eyes looked larger, brighter, her lips red with an outrageously expensive lipstick. Blush accentuated her delicate cheekbones, highlighted with a soft peach powder. She quirked her lips, amused, she certainly looked different. She looked like a sophisticated sex kitten. Who would have thought that was possible? She giggled, playing with the soft curls that framed her face.<em>

_"You look stunning."_

_Rin whipped her head around, her eyes widening in surprise, "Sesshomaru!" She scrambled to her feet, standing mere inches away from him, "What are you doing here? Wait!" She exclaimed, peeking around the door for any sign of the wedding planner. When she noted the coast was clear, she returned to him, hands to her hips, pouting. "Maru, you're not supposed to see me before the wedding! It's bad luck."_

_He chuckled, drawing her close, "I couldn't wait much longer," he told her, brushing a kiss onto her silk-covered shoulder, resisting all urges to remove it and reveal her ivory skin. "You know I'm an impatient man Rin," he purred, knowing how easy it would be to take her._

_She giggled, shaking her head playfully, "Fine. Since you're here, how do I look?" she asked, spinning twice in front of him. The bottom of her silk robe billowed out, revealing a lacy white slip underneath._

_"Ravishing, divine, enchanting, exquisite," he told her, amber eyes burning with desire, "Must I continue?"_

_Rin bit the corner of her bottom lip, shaking her head._

_"I want to kiss you," he murmured, holding her small hands in his. He brought her hands to his lips, pressing a kiss to each of her wrists. Rin felt her pulse quicken as she watched, her knees shaking with every touch._

_"Rin," he started, fingering her engagement ring,"I..."_

_"Sesshomaru!" Ayame hissed as she walked back in with the dress in her hands, though it was still in the white garment bag. "You can't be in here!" she chided, setting the dress onto the bed._

_Sesshomaru sighed, brushing his lips once more against her hand, "Very well. It seems I'm being kicked out." He kissed her cheek, "I suppose I'll see you in an hour."_

_Rin smiled, her voice soft, "I'll be the one in white."_

_He smirked, nodding his head to Ayame when he left the room._

* * *

><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

* * *

><p><em>Rin brushed away the tears that brimmed in the corner of her eyes, watching as her bridesmaids and groomsmen walked down the aisle together, waiting behind inside the castle.<em>

_"You're crying?" The wedding planner asked, concerned. She held up a handkerchief, embroided with the initials ST. _

_Rin laughed as she took the soft, white silk, gently wiping the tears away, "Is this Sesshomaru's?"_

_"Hai, your husband is an incredibly thoughtful man," the woman smiled, fixing her veil, "He told me that you might need it. Turns out he was right." _

_Rin shook her head, willing the tears to stop, "He is, he's wonderful. I just, I just wished that my family was here." _

_"They are," the woman's voice was soothing, "They are looking down at you right now, so proud, and so happy. I promise." She smiled sincerely, "Now, get ready."_

_Rin let out a deep breath as she walked in front of the large french doors, feeling her body tense up in fear. Before her was a white stone path, leading to a gazebo in the centre of the expansive garden. Standing in the centre of the gazebo stood Sesshomaru and the vicar. _

__She could hear the quartet change from their original instrumental to the familiar wedding march, ___"Alright Rin, it's time," the wedding planner pushed open the doors. "Don't trip," she winked, handing Rin her bouquet of white orchids before stepping behind her to fluff out the train of her dress._

_Rin giggled, stepping through the doors. Ok Rin, she thought, walking slowly down the aisle to the music, you can do this. Don't trip. Don't fall. Smile._

_She was halfway to the gazebo where the chairs for the guests began. She scanned the audience as she walked past, grateful for their encouraging smiles. Her hands began to shake as her eyes finally landed on her groom. He stood erect, warm amber eyes watching her every move. Finally she reached the steps, thanking Sesshomaru as he stepped down to help her up. She turned to hand Ayame her bouquet, before setting her hands in Sesshomaru's. She blushed as he squeezed her hands, looking up to the vicar who began his speech._

_"Friends, family and guests, today begins the first day of this couple's life as husband and wife..."_

* * *

><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

* * *

><p>"Miss Rin?" Jaken knocked on the closet door, "Miss Rin are you in there? Sesshomaru-sama's car service is already here!"<p>

Her heart clenched, _he's here_, "Oh." Quickly she sat up, rushing to grab her luggage, "Hai, I'm in here, sorry!" She pushed open the doors, wheeling out her bags.

"I'll get those Miss Rin," he waddled over, towing her yellow suitcase down the stairs. Rin followed obediently, stuffing her hands in the pockets of her lace sundress.

Jaken's beady eyes darted back and forth to Rin. He sighed, her once bright and expressive eyes were lackluster, her frame much too skinny for someone so petite. He chose his words carefully, "How are you faring Miss Rin?"

Rin's eyes peaked up from the floor, "Well, thank you Jaken." Her response was dull and automatic, lacking her cheerful countenance, "Yourself?"

He frowned, "Wonderful," he muttered, holding open the front doors of the magnificent mansion for her to pass through. Both statements were a lie. Since Sesshomaru-sama had awoken from the accident, he had been in a constant bad mood, causing suffer to his most loyal and effervescent employee. But perhaps, he thought, watching Rin climb into the limo, he had not suffered as much as Rin.

He handed the luggage to the driver, who placed it into the trunk. He smiled as he noted the contrast of their bags; Sesshomaru's suitcase was black, monogrammed leather while hers were yellow and polka-dotted. Yes, Miss Rin was perfect for his boss. She balanced him, bringing laughter and happiness to his life. He just hoped and prayed to Kami that he would remember.

Inside the limo Rin sat against the cool leather, her face set against the tinted windows. She shivered, the AC blasted in the back. She turned her head and saw Jaken and the driver talking briefly before Jaken hopped in next to her.

"Sesshomaru-sama's car will meet us ten minutes to Murasaki-sama's residence. You will transfer yourself to his vehicle and from there you will drive up together. Is that clear?"

Rin nodded dully, biting her lip. _Was he so disgusted by her that he take a separate car?_ She sighed, curling up in her corner. Her sight soon turned weary as the buildings blurred into one another, the people indistinguishable from the trees. In a matter of moments she had fallen asleep, succumbing to her exhaustion.

She dreamt of a garden full of orchids and tulips, a picnic full with fruit and cupcakes, kids frolicking about, their laughter, their squeals of joy. She dreamt of a silver-haired gentleman who held her close, who whispered sweet nothings, and who never said goodbye.

* * *

><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

* * *

><p>Three hours later she was awoken by Jaken's squawky voice, his index finger poking her shoulder repeatedly. "Miss Rin. Miss Rin. Please wake up Miss Rin. Sesshomaru-sama is not a patient man. Miss Rin!"<p>

She yawned, her sleepy eyes setting upon the man with the green complexion. She giggled at the look upon his face, "Sorry Jaken." She tucked her bangs to the side, "Car rides always put me to sleep."

Instantly his expression softened, his tone genial as he ushered her out of the car, "It's alright Miss Rin. Please do hurry," he held the door open for her, watching as she crouched out of the limo, and walked up the the silver coupe. He scrambled to grab their luggage, placing it into the trunk of the Mercedes. He ran over to the driver's side of the car, bowing his head in respect, "Everything is in order sir."

"Hn," Sesshomaru glanced over to his assistant, "Is my father arriving later?"

"Yes sir." Jaken spoke hesitantly, watching as Rin buckled up her seatbelt, "They are arriving later in the evening."

"Very well," Sesshomaru shifted the car into gear and sped off onto the highway. Rin was quiet as she watched him drive, playing with the buttons to adjust her seat. She smiled once she got the perfect spot, leaning comfortably against the soft leather, "How are you today Sesshomaru?"

He looked upon her, disdain clearly etched upon his face, "Small talk Rin? Really?"

She closed her eyes, _I tried, I really did_, "Gomen." She exhaled, the silence, the tension, was slowly becoming unbearable. With a quick flick of her wrist she turned on the radio, tuning into her favorite station.

"Hits Tokyo, 98.1. This is Sammy Q, with a request from a man nicknamed Jay. We will be playing your requests for the next hour. But for now Yellow, by Coldplay."

Rin's breath hitched, her eyes flicking to _him_. The song was starting, the guitar instrumental, the addition of drums, the cool, soothing voice of the lead singer. She tightened her hands into fists, closing her eyes, listening, remembering...

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p><em>Rin held Sesshomaru's hand as they walked towards the doors to the ballroom. She giggled as she peaked in; the bridesmaids and groomsmen were finishing up their little dance number to Baby Got Back.<em>

_"And now," the DJ's voice boomed over the loudspeakers, "The moment you have all been waiting for; may I present to you, for the first time ever, Mr. and Mrs. Sesshomaru Takahashi!"_

_Sesshomaru looked over to Rin and smirked, tightening his hold on her hand as they walked through the double doors held open by the hotel staff. The crowd applauded and cheered with fervor as they strode into the center of the dance floor, the music changing from the fast-paced number to the song for their first dance: Yellow._

_Sesshomaru wrapped his left arm around her waist, bending down to brush his lips against hers. She was blushing as he did, eagerly matching his touch. She smiled brightly when they pulled away, gently wiping away her lipstick from his lips with her thumb. "We're married," she murmured dreamily, resting her head against his chest. She breathed in his musky scent, a mixture of cologne, and aftershave, the effects dizzying, intoxicating._

_"So we are," he kissed the top of her head, swaying to the rhythm of the music. He pulled away to spin her, dipping her down low, whilst she laughed the entire time. She beamed as he drew her back into his arms, moving onto her tip toes to kiss his chin._

_"You know I love you so, you know I love you so," she sang along with the song, wrapping her arms around his neck. She set her gaze on him, her eyes slowly misting as the song continued. Sesshomaru gazed back, her brown eyes shining and so expressive. He could see her emotions, how easily he read her._

_"You can never keep secrets," he told her, kissing her eyelids, "Your eyes say too much."_

_She bit her lip thoughtfully, cocking her head to the side,"What are they saying now?"_

_He chuckled; he saw happiness, laughter, and love. He took her left hand, kissing her ring finger. He held her gaze as the song began to die off, though this time Sesshomaru sang, his baritone hushed, "Look at the stars, look how they shine for you, and all the things that you do."_

_Rin laughed, wiping her eyes, still crying, "You're my husband!" She leaned up to kiss him, arms wrapped around his neck. He smiled as he lifted her up, arms tightening around her small waist. He held her close, bending down to set her back onto the floor, his lips still pressed against hers. The crowd was whistling and clapping when they pulled apart, Rin's cheeks flushed, his fingers tangled in her hair. He pressed a kiss to her forehead, "As you are my wife."_

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><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

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><p>Rin felt the lone tear drop down her cheek when she opened her eyes. She turned her head, frowning as she noted Sesshomaru's death grip on the steering wheel. His jaw was clenched, a look of agitation clear on his visage. He looked at her through the corner of his eyes, flicking off the radio, relishing in the silence that remained for the rest of the trip.<p>

"We're here," he announced, his shoulders tense as he drove through a set of large, black wrought iron gates.

"It's beautiful," Rin murmured, sitting up in her seat to take the villa in. It was expansive, luxurious, and newly built. A modern piece of paradise just hours from the city; or so it was advertised. It lied on a lush green hill, with two water features in the front yard, a tennis court, an infinity pool and bar. And that was just what she could see from the car.

"Hn," Sesshomaru interrupted her train of thought, pulling out something from his jacket pocket. "Here," he looked over at her, handing her a small, black velvet box.

Rin blinked as she took the box from his hand, placing it gently onto her lap. Apprehensively, she lifted the lid, speechless at what lay inside. She fingered the diamonds, berating herself as she felt tears stream down her cheek. _Kami_, she thought, _her rings_. She slowly lifted the gold and platinum bands from the box, sliding them onto her ring finger, one by one. The wedding band first, the engagement ring second. The weight was heavy, almost uncomfortable, her hands shaking with fear, with heartache. She swallowed dryly, holding her hand in front of her, remembering that day. _Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry..._

* * *

><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

* * *

><p><em>Rin grinned as she watched the sun set from the balcony of their beach house. From where she stood, the yellow seemed to melt into a canvas of reds and purple while the sound of the waves lapping rhythmically against the shores only added to the mystique. "Maru," she murmured, leaning back into his warm chest, "It's so beautiful."<em>

_He smirked, tightening his hold on her, "I thought you'd enjoy it." He pressed a soft kiss against the top of her midnight tresses, running his hand down the length of her arm before capturing her hand with his, "Come," he pressed his lips onto her shoulder, "Let's go for a walk."_

_"Ok." They walked hand-in-hand to the beach in silence, taking in the breathtaking scene surrounding them. She giggled, feeling the cold waves brush against the sides of her feet, "The water's chilly," she noted, wrapping her arms around his side._

_"Hn," he stopped walking, his toes digging into the wet sand, "Let's take a midnight swim," he suggested, throwing her a playful grin._

_She was momentarily shocked, oh how her heart stopped when he smiled,"But," she sputtered, "I... I don't have a swimsuit on."_

_"Nor do I," he released his hold of her, "Such a shame we weren't better prepared." He smirked, holding her gaze as he stripped out of his navy blue polo and jeans._

_Rin was bright red, her gaze set on his lean, long, form. "That's not fair," she pouted playfully, "You know my brain stops working when you get naked."_

_He chuckled, left in only his black briefs, "Shall I help you undress then?" He asked, walking towards her, like a lion to his lamb. His arm snaked around her waist, "It'd be quite simple," he whispered, his silky voice sending shivers down her spine. "All I would have to do," he spoke softly, his fingers finding the zipper of her lilac maxi dress, "Is this." He pulled down, the dress billowing down to the sand. She blushed, shivering as the wind blew against her ivory skin._

_She tiptoed out of the pool of silk,"Well now," she turned to face him, feeling bold, wrapping her arms around his neck, "That was quite simple, wasn't it?"_

_"Hm," he bent his head down, her lips to tempting to resist,"So it was," he murmured, kissing her until they were breathless. The touches were brief and soft, his hands caressing her warm form._

_She grinned when she pulled back, her chocolate eyes dancing with laughter, "Catch me if you can, old man!" She squealed, running into the ocean, knowing he was only an arm length away. She shrieked when she felt those warm arms capturing her waist, dragging her down into the ocean with him. They played for hours, stealing brief, salty kisses while the moon shined overhead for them._

_"Sesshomaru," she whispered, lids heavy as she rested her head atop of his shoulder._

_"You're falling asleep on me again," he replied, his hold on her bottom secure as she wrapped her legs around his torso._

_She laughed, wrapping her arms around his neck "What can I say," she smiled impishly, pecking his lips, "You make a great pillow."_

_He raised his brow, "I do believe that's the first time I've ever been told that."_

_"Well," she stuck out her tongue playfully,"That's because you're getting chubby. Must be from eating all the cookies I make for Shippo."_

_He scoffed indignantly, flexing his torso for effect, "I most certainly am not getting fat."_

_Rin giggled, "I know, I know. My silly Maru, Michelangelo's masterpiece." She soothed his ego, pressing soft kisses onto his chin, "Handsome silver hair, and a really hot bod." She snorted, unable to continue, burying her head into his chest, "It's no wonder you have such a large fan base."_

_He rolled his eyes, beginning his walk back to the beach. "Are you admitting that you're jealous?"_

_"No, no, not at all." She shook her head for effect, "I'm more terrified than anything. You know, I get death glares all the time now."_

_He chuckled, setting her down onto a towel. Rin quirked her brow, running her hands over the soft, white cotton. "How'd these get here?"_

_He shrugged, indifferent, picking one from the basket, "The staff is efficient." He dried himself off before settling next to her. She smiled, pulling her knees to her chest. She rested her head a top of her legs, looking over to the ocean. As the midnight blue waves slowed down their race to the shores, her mind began to wander. Her lips quirked as she wondered if she would ever be able to look at a night sky, at a sunset, or even a star without thinking of him._

_"You're far away," he murmured, sitting up._

_"Hm?" She turned her head, her heart nearly stopping at how beautiful he looked in the night sky. He's really mine? She bit her lip; was he really her Prince Charming? Could I really have a happy ending?_

_His fingers sought hers, their hands intertwined. "I..." she began, hesitating to voice her fears that maybe it had all been just a dream and that one day she'd wake up and be alone once more,"Maru," her eyes teared up, "I..."_

_"Shh," he leaned forward, taking her lips. She moaned, instantly forgetting her fears, feeling safe and secure in his arms She smiled as she felt him tug her hair from her ponytail, felt his hands trail across her form._

_"I love you," she whispered when they parted for breath, nuzzling his cheek._

_He was still for a moment, his thumb running along her ring-finger, "I know." He kissed her once more, placing a quick kiss on her brow. As she leant against him she felt his warmth, his fingers running along her arms, his soft kisses, his love._

_"Maru," she whispered, her brows knitting together as something bright caught her eye. "What so you think that is?" she asked, pointing to the bright reflection to their left._

_Sesshomaru smirked, turning his head, "I believe that's a bottle."_

_She gasped, "A bottle?" She scrambled up to her feet, running over the white sand to where she spotted the glass reflect back the moon's beams. She fell to her knees, gently digging it out with her hands. She gasped as she picked up the bottle, in awe of its beauty, its mystery. She caressed the smooth sides, spotting a note was inside. It looked aged, the paper yellow, its edges tattered and burnt. "Maru! I think it's a message in a bottle!" She exclaimed, holding it out for Sesshomaru to see._

_"So it is." He stood up, moving to dress himself. His tone was nonchalant as he began to button his shirt, "Why don't you open it?"_

_"Alright!" She giggled, turning back around. "Maybe it's a treasure map! Or a long-lost love letter! Wouldn't that be so romantic?" Slowly she uncorked it, tilting the bottle so the note fluttered out and onto her palm. She unrolled the message, her breath hitched as she read the contents._

_'Will you marry me?' Those four words were written in that cursive script she knew all too well._

_"Sesshomaru?" Her lip quivered, her legs shaky as she stood,"Wh-what is this?" She spun to face him, her heart stopping as she found him knelt down behind her, dressed in a white cotton button down and grey trousers, a ring clutched in between his forefinger and his thumb. He was sans tie, sans cufflinks, and sans Italian leather. At that moment, he was purely her Maru. He smiled, taking her hand, "Rin. My beloved Rin," he pressed a kiss onto her hand, "Will you do me the greatest honor and become my wife?"_

_She nodded, her words taken from her by the beauty of the moment. Tears were flowing down as he pushed the ring onto her finger, "Yes," she whispered shakily, wiping away the moisture from her eyes, "A million times yes."_

* * *

><p>..forgetmenot..<p>

* * *

><p>Her heart clenched at the memory, <em>he doesn't love you<em>, she reminded herself, furiously wiping away the tears that continued to fall. _He never loved you_. She cast her eyes on his hand, noting his ring finger was bare.

"How about your ring?" Her voice wavered, thumbing the metal bands.

Sesshomaru placed his hand on the handle of the door, pushing out, "Unnecessary," his tone cold and scathing. The car door opened, Sesshomaru stepped out, and handed his keys to the butler.

Rin squeezed her eyes shut, trying to ignore the pain in her chest, the memories. "Ok Rin. You can do this." She was finding it harder and harder to breathe. "You can do this," she whispered, blinking back the tears.

"Miss?" The butler peeked in his head through the driver's side, concerned, "Are you alright?"

Rin looked to the butler, smiling, "Hai, thank you. Just day dreaming," She let out a shaky breath, muttering Sesshomaru a thank you as he opened the car door for her. _It's a facade_, she reminded herself, tucking her arm through his. He stiffened as she did, eyes locked straight ahead.

"Ah! Rin! Sesshomaru!" Fusao burst through the front doors, arms stretched out. He hugged Rin first, before shaking Sesshomaru's hand.

"Murasaki-sama," Rin bowed her head in greeting, "Your place is so lovely."

"Ah, what did I tell you my dear, please call me Fusao." The older man smiled, "But yes. It's always been a dream of mine to live away from the city. Much quieter don't you think? Come," he held the door open for them, "Come inside and I will give you a quick tour. I know you must be tired from your long drive so I promise I will be quick and give you both some time to rest before tonight's dinner. You," he gave a stern look to the butler, "Bring their bags to their room."

The butler bowed obediently, opening the trunk of the Mercedes.

"Now, this is the foyer," he gestured towards the hanging crystal chandelier, "That was brought over from Paris. It took nineteen men to assemble it, but in the end, I think it was worth it, no?" He laughed jovially, "Anyways," he led them through his expansive house, past the expensive artwork and photographs, "Through here is the kitchen. Please feel free to eat as a much as horse if you so please. I have two chefs on staff for the weekend so be sure to use them to your full advantage." He led the way through the winding hallways, past the library, sitting room, sun room and gym, up a grand staircase to a set of double doors. He chuckled to himself as he opened the doors, "And this is your suite. I'll leave you two for the moment. Dinner will be served at six. Adieu," he kissed Rin's hand and nodded his head to Sesshomaru before he took his leave.

Rin felt her hands tremble as she walked onto the hard-wood floor, her gaze set on the king-sized bed. "There's only one bed," she murmured, running her hand over the embroidered comforter.

"Hn," Sesshomaru walked around the room, pulling open the curtains of their balcony doors. He gazed outside, taking note of the lush, green grounds.

"Excuse me," the butler knocked on the door lightly, "Your bags Mr. and Mrs. Takahashi."

Rin smiled, "Thank you. You can set them by the dresser."

"Yes ma'am," he bowed deeply, closing the doors before he left the room.

Sesshomaru turned the bronzed lever, opening the glass entrance, the cool breeze entering the room like a hushed whisper. Rin watched as he walked to the side and closed his eyes, resting his hands on top of the balustrade. At that moment he looked serene, as if _he_ wasn't lost. Her heart ached as her gaze rested on his left hand, he looked so much like _her_ Sesshomaru. She walked towards him, her heels making a soft noise against the cobblestone flooring.

"Why did you say yes?" He asked, turning around to face her, his tone lacking the usual ice and malice.

Rin peeked up at him, shocked to see his amber eyes tender and vulnerable. He looked tired, almost as if he slept as horribly as she. "I..." her words were dulcet as she spoke, "I don't know."

"It wasn't for money." He noted, watching as she clutched her rings, her brown eyes darting around the grounds, the lush and vibrant garden below.

She frowned, hurt that he would ever think that she loved him only for his wealth, "It was never about your money."

He tensed, "Then why did you say yes? Why did you agree to spend a year of your life living a lie?"

Rin felt a lone tear drop onto her cheek, "I don't know," her voice cracked, knowing she wouldn't be able to hold it in for much longer.

He snarled, the anger, the confusion, the memories flowing back, "Then why the fuck do you care for me? Why the fuck," he asked, cornering her against the brick wall, "Why the fuck did you say yes?"

Rin whimpered, refusing to meet his stormy gaze, "I don't know."

He growled, his arms braced against her form, trapping her, "Why?" he hissed, "Why Rin? Answer me!"

"Because..." her voice was shaky, struggling to keep her composure, "Because I'm still in love with you. Because even if it's for a minute, it's like the accident never happened and you're still my Maru. Because for a moment you still like to drink your coffee with hazelnut cream, you still love playing catch with Shippo, you still give me flowers, you still laugh, you still smile, and you still kiss me goodnight. I can pretend that you still hold my hand, that you still try to make breakfast, and that you still love me." She bit her lip, tears clouding her vision, knowing her words were pathetic, "That you've always loved me. I couldn't say goodbye. I can't." _Not yet._

His fists clenched, internally losing an already hopeless battle. His hand came to cup her cheek, brushing the tears away with his thumb. "You're nothing to me," he whispered, knowing that he was lying, like he told himself everyday. "I don't need you," he repeated, his other hand grasped her waist, bringing her form close to his. "I never loved you," he told her vehemently, watching as the tears spilt out, watching as her eyes closed, as his hold on her tightened, and as his lips pressed against hers.

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><p>xoxo<p>

tuille


	10. Chapter 10

chapter 10

by

tuille

disclaimer: not mine.

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><p>my mac died T.T the motherboard fried. beware of overheating! too much midnight reading. what do i do with it now? recycle it somehow?<p>

sigh. #firstworldproblems

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>"I never loved you," he told her vehemently, watching as the tears spilt out, watching as her eyes closed, as his hold on her tightened, and as his lips pressed against hers. He held her wrists to the stone wall, groaning, yielding to his want, his need for her soft flesh against his. He closed his eyes as he kissed her, his ministrations no longer soft and teasing, his body taut against hers. "Rin," he whispered, his voice hoarse, needing, wanting, pressing his lips to the soft skin behind her ear.<p>

She mewled in response, clinging to him, feeling his lips brush against hers. She whimpered, running her hands through his silver tresses, feeling his tongue tugging against hers. She felt his arm move to wrap around her waist, lifting her up. Her legs wrapped around his warm torso, "Sesshomaru," she murmured through the kisses, "Please," she pleaded, moaning with pleasure. She knew it was wrong; every touch, every kiss. She knew that he felt nothing for her, that he didn't love her; yet she didn't stop. She didn't stop herself from kissing him back, didn't stop her hands from running down his chest, and didn't stop herself from forgetting that he was no longer hers. She didn't stop him from pushing her against the hard brick wall, her eyes bristling with tears as the stone dug into her back. She ignored the pain, the dull ache in her chest, and relished being in his arms once again. _Even if it's just a lie._

"Fuck," Sesshomaru cursed low, hissing as she brushed against his member. He groaned, one arm holding her small frame, her arms wrapped around his neck, his other arm braced against the wall for support. "Rin," he hissed as he pushed away from the wall, lips still pressed against hers, stumbling into the bedroom. He stepped over their bags towards the bed, setting her onto the embroidered comforter, his form over hers. He plunged his tongue against hers viciously, savoring her sweet honeysuckle taste. He ground his hips against hers, fisting her hair tight in his hold, "Mine," he repeated, looking at her as he spoke, his words laced with deadly desire, "You're fucking mine," his tone was possessive, amber eyes glazing over with pure hunger.

Rin shivered, "Yours," she spoke softly, pressing gentle kisses along his jaw, "Only yours." She moaned as she felt his hand slip up her dress, his finger tips pressing against her lace covered core. She jerked as he caressed her centre, her own hands traveling over his lean frame. "Sesshomaru," she pleaded, tugging on his dress shirt. He growled, pulling back as he ripped it open, throwing it behind him. His lips crashed down upon hers as he pushed her dress up, pushing past the flimsy silk lace, his hands kneading, rubbing, and manipulating her to her peak. She bit his lip, arching her back, daring not to verbalize her pleasure. Her soft moans drove him to a frenzy, wanting more. He craved her soft flesh, her sighs of pleasure.

He smirked, his gaze darkening, his hold on her hips tightening, "Come for me," he ordered, his voice husky, his gaze seductive. He watched as she twisted, her body writhing with want. She soon cried out, her nails digging into his back. She whimpered, resting against the pillows, her delicate form pacified and spent. She opened her eyes, her gaze shaky as it settled on his. Gone was the cold, tempered amber; what remained was a warm, molten honey, dripping with lust. _Her Sesshomaru. _

"Maru," she whispered, exhausted, forgetting all realities. If felt like a dream, to be in his arms once again. To feel his lips press against hers, to feel his hands hold hers, to feel his warm form against hers. _If only for a moment, _she thought, a single tear dripping down her flushed cheeks, _love me._ Her left hand trembled as she stroked his cheek, "I..." she choked, tears spilling out, "Please..." _Don't go. _

His hands clenched the moment she spoke his name, her voice dulcet, soft, and melodious, yet entirely vexing. He closed his eyes as he felt the cool metal of her rings against his skin, remembering; remembering who she was, why she begged for him, why she cried. _My wife. _He growled, furiously gripping her tiny waist, _no,_ amber eyes cooled in realization,_ she's nothing to me. _His eyes opened once more and he took a minute, memorizing her brown eyes that no longer lacked life and luster, her lips red and inviting, her alabaster cheeks flush with desire. Her raven hair was curled and ravished, her haunting doe eyes brimming with tears. He pushed back, _a lie, _he reminded himself, moving away as if she were an abhorrent beast, _a lie. _His moves were robotic as he walked to the balcony doors, closing them with a soft click. He shut the purple curtains before he redressed, feeling her gaze on him, knowing that if he looked back he would see her lips bruised, her hair tangled, her ivory form flush and firm.

He struggled to push thoughts of _her_ out of his mind, trying to ignore her presence, her soft voice call out his name. He redressed quickly before he paused at the door, not daring to look back. _Coward. _"Outside on the lake was a group of photographers hired by Miroku," he spoke low, his hand clenched around the doorframe, giving reason for his lapse in judgement. _He felt nothing for her, _he told himself repeatedly,_ she was nothing to him. _He struggled to temper his want, his desire, "Dinner begins at six," he spoke, his tone cold, scathing, "Make yourself presentable." He closed the door, the sound resounding throughout the halls. He paused, stiffening when he heard her sobs, her muffled cries. His fists still clutched tight as he rested his head against the white wood. His eyes closed, his anger slowly dissipating, and he remembered...

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p><em>Rin smiled as she held his hand, blushing as he quirked his brow in amusement. "Tell me about your childhood," she whispered, tracing figures onto his arm. <em>

_"My childhood," he repeated, looking over the horizon. The sun was slowly rising, the orange hue piercing through the pale blue sea of clouds and buildings. He smirked, resting his head on top of hers, musing. Had they really spent the whole night talking? He chuckled, amused by their date, in utter wonderment with her, "My childhood was atypical." He began, running his thumb over her ringed-finger, "My mother divorced my father when she found him in bed with his mistress, whereby she took half of his assets and ran away to New York. Consequently I had a half-brother born out of wedlock who spent his own childhood annoying me every opportunity he had. I lived with my grandfather after he was born, before taking law at a university in New York. Then instead of delving into and dominating the world of corporate law, I took over my father's company." _

_She rolled her eyes playfully, giggling as she leant up to kiss his cheek, "Boring. Tell me something better than that. Tell me..." she looked up, her chestnut eyes sparkling with the rising sun, "About..." She grinned, those two dimples he found so enchanting appearing on her alabaster cheeks, "Your first kiss." _

_He laughed wholeheartedly, her question unexpected, "My first kiss?" He leant back into the couch, his arm wrapped around her, "Very well. I believe that it took place when I was in the first grade, at the annual halloween party held at my primary school. Her name was Sara Tanaka and she was in the second grade. An older woman." He smirked, running his hand through Rin's bangs,"Besides the point; she was dressed as a princess and was considered to be the prettiest girl at the school. I, being the coolest five year old alive, was Prince Charming. As such, I decided it was my duty to have her be my girlfriend. I wooed her with my good looks and charms, and after snack-time, I kissed her in the sandbox." He wiggled his brows suggestively, pressing a kiss onto her nose,"Perhaps you'd like to accompany me to a sandbox some day?" _

_She giggled, burying her head in his chest, "Prince Charming," she murmured, her lips tickling his neck, "Kami that's adorable." She beamed, pulling back, "I hope you have pictures." _

_He sighed, playing with the ends of her raven tresses, "Unfortunately I do. Izayoi has them stored in one of her several hundred scrapbooks." _

_"Awesome," she snuggled back into his arms, yawning lightly, struggling to keep her eyes open, "When I have tea with her and Kagome tomorrow I'll try and steal it for you." _

_Sesshomaru pressed a kiss to her crown, tucking the small grey blanket around her, "How about you?"_

_"My first kiss?" Rin shook her head, her hands clutched around his, "I didn't have one. Well, obviously I had one, but just, well... you know how it was. I mean, er," she bit her lip, "It was you," she let out a nervous laugh, "So maybe it was good? I dunno, maybe it was bad?"_

_He knit his brows, "Never? There was no one before me?" _

_"No one." She sighed, continuing as she caught his pressing gaze, "I was... an odd kid. Before the accident, when my parents were still alive, I was the odd ball at school. I would rather play with flowers and weeds then people. The other kids didn't like me, the only reason why they didn't pick on me was because of my older brother. He was the best. He was the popular kid I guess, I mean he was only twelve but he was already a ladies man," she smiled, her fingers playing with an ivory button on his sweater, "And then after the accident..." she trailed off, her eyes closing as she remembered her time in the orphanage, how her heart ached at the memory, "I... I didn't have many friends." I didn't have any. "But it got better," she murmured, brushing her fingers against his warm, solid chest, "Now I have Ayame and Kouga," she grinned, "I have Jak, Sango, Miroku, Izayoi, Kagome, Yasha, your dad and then, there's you." She pressed her lips lightly against his, "Sesshomaru Takahashi." She smiled, kissing his cheek, "Closet artist and motorcycle enthusiast. Collector of ancient swords and classic timepieces. A well-dressed gentleman who hates olives, has a soft spot for his nephew, and is an incredibly talented architect." She grinned, tugging on his locks, "Gorgeous silver hair that's always so soft, beautiful gold eyes that can make me speechless, and a smile that takes my breath away." _

_"As I have you." He kissed her palm, looking into her eyes. "Rin Todoko," he brushed his lips against her ring, "Soon to be Takahashi." He smiled, "Closet pastry chef and ballerina. Lover of all things orange and soft. Eats like a trucker, craves ice cream in the middle of the night, and talks in her sleep." He tucked her hair behind her ear, "A beautiful woman with an enchanting smile, who can't play chess, hates beans, and loves to sleep." He brushed lips lips against hers, "Future mother to my children, my soon to be wife, my lover, and my best friend." _

_Rin felt the tears drip onto her cheek as he spoke, sniffling as she felt his warm hands brush them away, "I love you," she professed as she did every night, "More than anything." _

_He pressed his lips against her forehead, "I know," he replied softly, as he did every time she spoke those three words, shifting so she laid on top of his form. His arms encircled her waist, their legs intertwined, her head resting on his chest. He watched as she struggled to stay awake but it was a losing battle; it always was. He watched as her cheeks became rosy with warmth, as her lips pouted, her long lashes masking her chocolate orbs. "Maru," she murmured, snuggling closer, wrapping her arms around his torso, "I love you."_

_He paused, playing with her engagement ring as he looked over the Tokyo skyline. The sun was masked behind a large set of buildings, its rays piercing through the night sky. He relished the moment, the feel of her in his arms. How he adored her. His hold on her tightened, knowing he should say more but yet, he held back; like he always did, "I..." he sighed, pressing a kiss onto her engagement ring. Aishiteru. _

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Rin sank to her feet as she sat in the white china bath, letting the scorching water burn her skin, washing away the lavender scented soap, the shampoo and the memories. She sat still for what felt like hours, until the water no longer held its wrathful warmth. Her body ached, raw with the pain from scrubbing her body earlier, yet she felt nothing. She gripped the edges of the bath, trying not to relive her last few weeks, trying not to remember how her heart broke time and time again. <em>Kami, <em>she slammed her hands against the bottom of the tub, frustrated, furious. "Why?" she asked herself, curling her knees into her chest, "Why don't I get a happy ending?" She bit her tongue, fighting back the urge to scream, to fling the shampoo bottles onto the expensive floor, to strike the mirror with her fists. She clenched her hand, relishing in the pain of her nails digging into her soft flesh. _She had given him everything. Her first kiss, her first time, her soul, her heart. _She watched with twisted pleasure as she unclenched her hand, her mind swirling as a drop of blood dripped into the pool of bathwater, _why can't I forget you?_

Her legs were shaky as she stood up, nearly slipping as she stepped onto the tiled floor. She grabbed hold of a nearby towel, running the soft cotton against her body. She walked towards the bedroom, clutching the towel wrapped around her slight frame, but stopped in front of the full length, gold-trimmed mirror. She let the cotton towel drop, revealing her figure. _It was perverse, _she thought, studying her reflection, _the torture that she put herself through_. Her once youthful and radiant complexion was now pale and lackluster, her cheeks hollow, her eyes haunting. Her fingers travelled down from her collarbone that now jutted out, past the swell of her small breasts, finally tracing over her ribs. She turned sideways, her belly flat. _Flat, _she thought, holding a hand to her stomach, _and empty. _She felt the tears prickle as she remembered. She remembered her belly full, remembered the popcorn feeling inside of her, the happiness she had once felt, _her baby..._

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p><em>Rin chewed her lip nervously as she sat on the edge of the toilet seat, her hand grasping the white stick. It had to be the longest three minutes in her life, waiting for the little screen to show a plus or a minus sign. <em>

_"Pregnant," she murmured, still in disbelief at the mere thought. Her! Pregnant! She felt faint, anxious, and more than anything she prayed that it was true. _

_"Ms. Rin?" Jaken's squawking voice came nervously behind the bathroom door, "Is everything ok?" _

_"Yes Jaken, I'm just..." she looked to her watch then back to the stick, "Waiting for the results I guess?"_

_"Oh," Jaken paced anxiously, "Ok." He tried to breathe, but it was much too difficult. Rin could be pregnant! Sesshomaru-sama was to be a father! Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, "How much longer!" _

_Rin giggled, she could imagine her husband's assistant pulling out his last few hairs, "Thirteen seconds." _

_"Ack!" Jaken pulled at his tie, "Kami. Are you sure I shouldn't phone Sesshomaru-sama?" He sincerely did not want to deal with his wrath. "Are you sure he wouldn't want to be here?"_

_"It's ok Jaken, it may just be a false alarm." At least that's what she told herself. What she reasoned. They had only been married for six months. Were they even ready for a baby? She sniffed, lifting her fingers from the test to reveal the screen. The stick chimed, a bright blue symbol appearing on the grey display. Her breath hitched, "A plus sign." She was pregnant. "Kami," the stick dropped onto the tiled floor, "I'm pregnant." She swallowed, lifting her shirt to reveal her belly. There was something inside of her. Growing. "Kami," she felt faint, holding a hand to her belly,"I'm pregnant," she spoke softly, her mind running circles around the sudden realization. It took a moment for it to set in that soon she was going to be a mother. _

_"Ms. Rin!" Jaken knocked furiously on the door, "Are you ok?"_

_"Hai," her hands were shaky as she picked up the test, finding it hard to breathe,"Hai." She moved to the door, grinning as she handed Jaken her pregnancy test, "It's positive," she whispered, her eyes brimming with tears. _

_Jaken's eyes widened as he looked down at the plus sign, "Kami-sama," he whispered as he came to a realization, "Sesshomaru-sama will have a heir to his throne!" He thrust his arms high in delight, "Thank the heavens! Sesshomaru-sama will be forever powerful!" He pulled out his phone, dialing a number quickly, "Oh," he was giddy, bouncing up and down, "Sesshomaru-sama will be ever so delighted!" _

_"No!" Rin exclaimed lightly as she quickly grabbed the phone from his hands, "Don't say anything yet. Just," she swallowed nervously, "I'd like to tell him first, if that's ok."_

_"Oh," Jaken pouted, "Of course, of course," his head bobbed up and down, "I apologize for being ever so hasty Ms. Rin. Forgive me," he bowed graciously, "Shall I make an appointment with your doctor?"_

_"Yes, thank you Jaken," she kissed the top of his head, his pale green complexion turning red with abashment._

_"Congratulations Ms. Rin," Jaken bowed as he left the room, "You will be a wonderful mother to Sesshomaru-sama's future child." _

_Rin giggled, Jaken really did think that the world revolved around Sesshomaru, "Thank you Jaken." _

_"Hai," he closed the door gently, grabbing his satchel as he left their expansive condo. Rin let out a deep breath as she settled on their king-sized bed, resting her hands atop of her belly. There was a human growing inside of her. A baby. Their baby. With little fingers and little toes. With honey brown eyes and an adorable button nose. The baby would have his hair of course, his brains, his artistic proficiency. She laughed, her mind wandering. Was it a boy? Maybe a girl? She grinned, feeling silly, maybe it was both! Oh, she thought as she hugged his pillow to her torso, she was having a baby. Their baby. _

_He was going to be a great father. She could tell by the way he was so patient with Shippo. How he had tenderly held Sango's newborn, how he had read nighttime stories while they babysat their friends' children. She blinked back her tears; she was finally going to have her own little family. "I'm going to love you forever," she whispered, tracing hearts onto her stomach._

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Rin ran her fingers over her belly, cursing her own naivety, her inability to realize that it had all been just an elaborate lie. <em>She felt so empty, so alone. She was a fool to ever think that she could finally be so happy, that Sesshomaru was truly her Prince Charming. Why had she so easily believed his lies? His kisses, his touches, his promises? She cursed herself for being so gullible to believe that she could truly live a fairytale. That she could have her happily ever after. <em>

She whimpered when she felt a sharp pain in her abdomen, grasping onto the gold frame for support. It hurt, the feeling of a thousand knives wedging into her side. _Cramps, _she reasoned, waiting for the pain to subside. She closed her eyes, concentrating on something other than the discomfort, pacing her breaths. She went to her happy place, a place full of vibrant flowers, lush, green grass, and sparkling blue skies. She imagined herself there, frolicking in the sun, surrounded by her loved ones. She imagined their faces, smiling back at her, dancing with her, until her gaze set upon Sesshomaru. She cried out, clenching the frame, the stabbing to her pelvis increasing tenfold.

She turned her head down to the side, her bangs covering her gaze. When the pain finally faded she wearily opened her eyes, her eyebrows knitting as she studied her reflection. She frowned as she took in her boyish figure, her small breasts, her elfin stature._ Ugly. _She bit her tongue, cursing as the tears fell_. Poor, little, unwanted Rin, _she thought bitterly, _she was a pathetic fool to have ever thought that she was beautiful. To believe that even for a brief moment she was ever worthy of someone like him. She wasn't stunning and glamourous like the woman she always thought he would end up marrying; like the women he had been with before her. _She snorted in disgust,_ like the women he had been with when he was married to her. Why had he chosen to marry her, with her pale figure, lacking curves, lacking elegance, lacking grace. _Her hands tightened in fists, looking to the floor in defeat. _She wasn't beautiful. She wasn't tall or sophisticated. She lacked the eloquence, the allure that he needed in a wife; in a lover. She wasn't enough. _She bit back the urge to cry, refusing to look at back at her reflection any longer,_ she was never enough. _

A ring slipped off her finger, the sound of it dropping onto the marble startling her from her thoughts. She stiffened in shock, her sight bleary as she struggled to find it. She bent down to search for it, reaching for the yellow diamond. As her fingers encircled the white gold she felt weary, her vision spotting black, her hands unsteady, her body swaying as she fell onto the tiled floor.

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Sesshomaru paced outside the dining room, glancing down at his watch ever so often. <em>She was late, <em>he thought, frowning as he looked down the hall.

"Ah, Sesshomaru!" Fusao was jovial as he shook his hand, "Have a good nap?" He grinned, turning to the woman on his arm, "This is the man I was telling you about. Sesshomaru, I'd like to introduce to you my date for this evening, Chieko Yamamoto, Chief of Staff at Tokyo West Metropolitan Hospital."

"A pleasure Mr. Takahashi," the woman held out her hand, shaking his lightly, "Fusao has told me a great deal about you and your wife."

"Hn," The corners of Sesshomaru's mouth lifted politely, "Only good things I hope." He looked over the woman, taking note that she was in her mid-forties, her form thin and lean, her makeup light, her face slightly aged with wrinkles. She was most unlike Fusao's previous string of romantic encounters who were typically young, modelesque trophy-wives in the making. This woman was Chief of Staff at Tokyo West which not only required intelligence, but hard-work, dedication and impeccable social skills. _His taste in women has certainly improved. _

Chieko laughed, wrapping her hand over Fusao's arm, "Of course, of course. Only the best. If I may be so bold to ask, where is your wife? I was keen on meeting the woman who has converted this man," she gazed at the man beside her teasingly, "Into a monogamous romantic."

Sesshomaru chuckled lightly, his response automatic, "If I know my wife, she has probably fallen asleep while getting ready."

Fusao raised a brow in amusement, "Tired her out already?"

Sesshomaru stiffened briefly before composing himself, "A gentleman never kisses and tells." He smirked, gesturing to the dining room, "Please, begin dinner. I'll retrieve Rin and we'll be in soon."

"Very well, don't be too long." Fusao wrapped his arm around Chieko, "I can only stand those men and their self-adsorbed wives for so long."

Sesshomaru nodded, "I'll be quick," he promised, holding the doors to the dining hall for them. Once they walked through he stuffed his hands into his pocket, his expression impassive as he walked through the halls.

"Rin," his voice was low as he knocked on their bedroom door, "Are you ready?" He waited a moment for a reply, "Rin?" He pushed in the doors to the bedroom, noting an embroidered midnight blue silk dress lying on the bed. He frowned, his fingers trailing over the fabric, "Rin?"

He walked to the bathroom, frozen at what he found. She laid on the white marble, her fall scantly cushioned by the cotton towel that lay underneath her immobile body. He cursed, rushing to her side, lifting her hand to check for her pulse. It was slow, her breathing barely audible, "Fuck," he knelt down, lifting her easily into his arms. He set her on the bed, checking her head for any signs of an injury. He shrugged off his suit jacket, resting it on top of her nude form. He took a steady breath, his hands curling around the comforter.

"What happened to you?" he asked himself, looking over her for any hint as to why she had collapsed. _She was so thin, _he thought, _so frail... so broken. _

"Fuck," he cursed as looked away, _was she ill? _He rushed out of the bedroom, striding down to the dining hall. His pace slowed as he neared the room, nodding his head in recognition as he walked past the other guests who were already seated and had begun to eat their entrees. Fusao sat at the head of the table, speaking animatedly to his date and the people around him. Fusao looked up as he heard the footsteps nearing, "Sesshomaru? Couldn't wake up Rin?"

Sesshomaru cleared his throat, speaking low, "I need to borrow your date," he murmured, making eye contact with the woman to his left.

"You're hijacking my date?" Fusao laughed, setting his napkin onto the table, "And for what reason."

Sesshomaru's expression was somber as he spoke, "Rin."

Chieko sat up immediatly, "What's wrong?"

"I don't know," he muttered, trying to erase the image of Rin lying on the bathroom floor. Her visage pale, her frame nearly emaciated. He ignored the gut-wrenching terror that he felt, "Please," he pleaded softly, "Just... help my wife."

"Of course," Chieko turned to press a kiss onto Fusao's cheek, "I'll be back soon."

Fusao patted her hand, understanding the gravity of Sesshomaru's words, "Don't rush."

The woman nodded and followed Sesshomaru out of the room, "Do you know what's happened to her?"

"I found her in the bathroom." Sesshomaru spoke low, keeping his facade calm and cool as they walked by a fellow business associate and his wife, "I'm unsure whether or not she slipped. Perhaps she fainted, but either way, she's not waking up."

Chieko nodded, "Very well." She thanked Sesshomaru as he pulled open the doors to the bedroom. She stepped through the doorframe, frowning as her gaze fell upon his wife. She placed her hand to Rin's neck, glancing down at her watch to check her pulse. "42 beats per minute," she murmured, "Her pulse is faint." She gently turned Rin's head, checking for swelling. She lifted her hair that covered her face, "She has a light mark on the left side of her forehead," she noted as she lifted Sesshomaru's suit jacked from Rin's form to check her left side for consistent bruises. "It'd be safe to assume that she fainted," Chieko spoke gravely, noting how Rin's bones poked out. "She's so thin," she remarked as she turned to Sesshomaru, "Has she been eating well since the accident?"

Sesshomaru felt nauseous and uneasy as he noted how Rin's ribs protruded from her side, how her cheeks were gaunt, how the tips of her pelvis stuck out of her ivory flesh. He looked to the floor, suppressing the mounting feelings inside of him, "Since the accident," he repeated, "No." He shook his head, "She hasn't been eating very well."

Chieko nodded, "I see." She lifted the comforter onto Rin's form, her tone light and wise, "Miscarriages are often terribly emotional for any woman, but especially for a first-time mother like Rin... it's been two weeks?"

Sesshomaru nodded, "Yes."

"It's quite normal for women to lose their appetite after an incident such as this. If anything, it's a sign of great grief, perhaps even depression. I urge you to see your regular doctor about this. She may need to be prescribed anti-depressants."

A_nti-depressants, _"I see," Sesshomaru cleared his throat, "Do you think she will wake up soon?"

"She should be up in the next two hours or so. She's just exhausted. Her body is clearly tired; it's trying to heal itself from the incident." She smiled, "She'll be fine, I promise." She patted his shoulder, "I would recommend that she eat when she awakes. I'll have someone bring in a bowl of soup for her and inform the guests that she's feeling unwell."

He walked Chieko to the door, shaking her hand politely, "Thank you for your aid."

"But of course." Her eyes twinkled merrily, "She's lucky to have a husband who cares so deeply for her."

"Hn," Sesshomaru muttered, "Lucky indeed." His eyes flickered back to her form, lying listlessly on the sheets, "Please inform Fusao that at the very least we shall be attending the charity ball tomorrow evening. His cause is dear to Rin's heart."

"Yes, the orphanage." The woman smiled, "It'll be fantastic when it's finished."

"Hn, it will." He played with the phone in his pocket, "Thank you once again."

Chieko nodded, returning to the dining room. Sesshomaru shut the double doors, sinking into the nearby chaise. He gripped his forehead, glancing wearily at his wife. _Was it somehow his fault that she was sick? _

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p><em>Rin was hesitant as she walked through the covered forest, the night sky casting ominous shadows onto the lightly worn path. Her steps halted as she neared an opening, where the tree line had parted, giving light to a lake glowing with lanterns that seemed to float in the sky. <em>

_"There you are," a woman flitted forward, her white dress billowing after her, "How are you my dear?" _

_Rin squeaked in shock, taken back by the woman's presence. "Uh, who," she stuttered her words, "Who are you?" _

_The woman smiled graciously, "Akemi Gato." She held out her hand, "It's a pleasure to finally meet you." _

_"Um, likewise," Rin smiled, shaking her outstretched hand. Whoever she was, she seemed like a nice lady. "So..." she looked around her, taking in the waterfall, the flowers, the white blanket that was laid over the dew covered grass, "Where am I?" _

_Akemi smiled, brown eyes sparkling mischievously, "Where are you not? Come," she sat on the blanket, a photo album appearing in her hands, "Have a seat. I'd like to show you something." _

_Rin sat beside the woman, eyes widening at the sudden materialization of the book. She tucked her legs beneath her bottom, "Is that a photo album?" _

_"Hai," the woman smiled, her demeanor serene, "Of your husband." _

_Rin tensed at her words: my husband. She felt her chest constrict, "He's..." she shook her head, "He's not..."_

_Akemi tsked lightly, handing her the leather-bound book, "He's just stubborn. Here, why don't you open it?" _

_Rin sighed as she lifted the heavy cover to the side, running her hands over a picture of Sesshomaru as a child. She laughed, delighted to see his cheeks chubby, his trousers soiled by the mud-puddle, "He's adorable," she murmured, caressing the picture. 'Was this what their son could have looked like?' She bit her lip, flipping over to the next page, urging herself to move on. Her brows knitted together at the next picture of Sesshomaru, flanked by his mother and father. He stood erect, his gaze cold, which was odd to see on such a young child. His parents stood apart, the tension between them palpable even in a picture. "Even when he was a child he knew how to look intimidating," she murmured, looking over to the older woman. _

_"Sesshomaru's childhood was not a happy one," Akemi noted, flipping the next page to a newspaper article. The headline was in bold, 'Takahashi Marriage in Ruins!' "Inutaisho married Sesshomaru's birth mother, Tomiko Meido, to appease his own father. She was a budding socialite, former model and graduate of Oxford University. He was heir to a realty empire, the most wanted bachelor of Tokyo at the time; he was handsome, well-liked and charming. It was a match made in heaven, yet it was a loveless marriage into which Sesshomaru was born. His mother tried half-heartedly to care for him but she much more concerned with her standing in society than his welfare. Meanwhile, Sesshomaru's father worked himself to the bone, nearly eighteen hours a day. They were never happy together and soon they even lived in separate residences. When Sesshomaru was three, Inutaisho took a mistress, whom he had met at a charity event. He was enchanted with the woman, who was the chair of the children's foundation. Finally, a woman who he could love, ne? Yet Sesshomaru's mother turned a blind eye to his affair, only ending the marriage once it was public knowledge that Inutaisho had moved on and she was disgraced. She left Sesshomaru in the custody of his father and moved to New York to start her own business; a modeling agency. She didn't even call her own son on his birthday." Akemi smiled softly, "Despite the wealth, the opportunities, the excellent education, his childhood was far from happy. Sesshomaru went to live with his grandfather after Inuyasha's birth, no longer able to stand living in his own home. For a long time Sesshomaru harbored ill will to Izayoi and Inuyasha, blaming them for the collapse of his parent's marriage. Tell me Rin," Akemi turned to the younger girl, clutching her necklace, "Do you know much about Sesshomaru's grandfather?" _

_Rin shook her head, "No. All I know is that Sesshomaru lived with him." _

_"Hm," Akemi looked to the sky, "He was a cold, loveless man. Cruel in his business deals, his women, and his drinking. To him, love was unnecessary. An impediment to financial gains and unimaginable wealth. He instilled those values in Sesshomaru, urging him to excel in his academics, his business and social skills. To Sesshomaru, his grandfather was his idol. He strived to be as great as he presumed him to be. It was not until his grandfather's death did he truly realize his faults. His grandfather was not the all-powerful man that he had once thought him to be. He finally realized that his grandfather was truly just a sad, bitter, lonely, old man, who had only money when he died." She smiled softly, patting Rin's hand, "Sesshomaru fell in love with you Rin. Believe me. Look," she turned the page of the album, "Her name is Kagura. I believe you've met her before."_

_Rin gasped as her eyes fell upon the photo. She remembered meeting Kagura at a party in New York, hosted by Sesshomaru's mother to welcome them to the city. She had remembered admiring the woman's seemingly effortless beauty, sophistication, and intelligence. If she remembered correctly, Kagura had modeled for two years to pay her way through law school, whereby she graduated at the top of the class and became partner of a prominent environmental law firm. Kami, thought Rin, how she paled in comparison. In the photo Kagura had her arm tucked through Sesshomaru's, the corner of her lips slightly turned up. She wore a purple dress that cut to her knees, revealing her long, toned legs. Her hair was tied into an elegant up-do, feather earrings dangling from her ears. Her makeup was impeccable, her face flawless. She exuded elegance, charm, and beauty. Rin swallowed dryly and looked to Sesshomaru. His visage was impassive, standing erect in a navy tuxedo. Both were tall and beautiful, both refined and aristocratic. Together, they looked like the perfect couple; a power couple. _

_"They were engaged for four months. Sesshomaru met Kagura while he was studying in New York. His mother introduced her to him and like his father, he was with her because in a societal view, they were perfect for each-other." She squeezed Rin's hand comfortingly, "But in reality, they were horrid together. They were both so cold, so reserved, that there was no affection, let alone love. Their engagement soon ended and Sesshomaru left New York for Tokyo. A year or so later, he met you." She turned the page, and revealed their own engagement photo. _

_Sesshomaru stood in the center of the frame, his lips quirked, his gaze playful. He wore an elegant two-piece suit, his tie thin and black. Behind him stood Rin, her face visible behind his shoulder. She stood on her tiptoes, her hands covering Sesshomaru's eyes, her ringed hand parted to reveal his eye. She was grinning, wearing a yellow sundress, her hair softly curled. "The dichotomy between these two photos is amazing, no?" Akemi turned the page once more, this time revealing one of their many wedding photos. Together, they were in a field of wild flowers, Sesshomaru lifting Rin up, his arms holding her bottom as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, her lips pressed against his. Her dress billowed with the wind, an orange poppy tucked in her hair. "Here, Sesshomaru is so playful, so affectionate, so loving. A far cry from the first photo." Akemi set the book down, looking over the lake, "You must understand Rin that before he met you, Sesshomaru had a year to process his grandfather's death. A year to understand who he truly was, and what he truly wanted in his life, let alone his partner. And now, after the accident, Sesshomaru remains torn. Part of him is telling him that he didn't love you; that he never loved you. He thinks that perhaps he was intrigued by you, but surely he would have never married you because of love. That part of him believes that he married you only because of the great benefits you brought to the company. But yet, there is another part of him that is fighting to remember you." _

_Akemi stood up, walking to the edge of the lake, "Love is not easy. It's frustrating, heart-rending, and gut-wrenchingly horrid, but absolutely worth the pain. Give him time. Give him patience." She chuckled, stroking her locket, "You know as well as I that he's stubborn." She bent down to touch the crystal blue waters, speaking softly, "Just like his grandfather." _

_Rin chewed her bottom lip, wanting to believe this woman, wanting to believe that he loved her. That somewhere deep inside he still loved her. That _her_ Sesshomaru was still there. She ran through dozens of scenarios through her mind, all ending in never-ending heartache,"What if I'm not what he wants anymore?" _

_Akemi smiled, her tone omniscient, "It's difficult not to want the other half of your soul." _

_Rin blinked back the tears, her vision blurring. The rush of emotions were so confusing, so frustrating. She ached for him. She ached for his love, yet he was no longer the man that she had loved with all her heart. How she wished for _him_ to come back. Rin felt her hand being squeezed as a soft beam of light blinded her view, and heard Akemi's soft voice from a distance, "Fight for him Rin. Fight for your love like I never had the courage to do." _

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p><em>xo<em>

_tuille_


	11. Chapter 11

chapter 11.

by

tuille

disclaimer: all that you recognize does not belong to me.

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><p>I apologize for taking so long but when my computer crashed I lost all the chapters I had written. It's tough trying to remember where I was going with this baby but here's chapter 11!<p>

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><p>Rin felt groggy as she awoke, her lids heavy and crusted, her body sore. She felt parched, the overwhelming need for water burning her mouth. The room was blurry as she looked around, taking in the somber atmosphere, the heavy curtains closed, the lights off save for a small nightlight in the corner. She tensed as her eyes laid upon the man in the chair, his head slumped to the right as he slept uncomfortably upon the leather seat. She didn't know if she dare speak, if she dare wake the man from his slumber.<p>

She shifted up, the warm jacket slipping off her torso. Her gaze fell upon the black wool, her fingers playing with the top button. She looked back to the man, taking note how the suit jacket matched his subtly pin striped slacks. _It's his, _she thought, bringing the cloth closer to her face, inhaling its scent. Her body tingled as she smelled his signature scent, _bergamot, cedar, and tonka beans. How she missed him. _

"You're awake."

Rin gasped, her head jolting up to look into his eyes, "H-hai." She averted her gaze, clutching his jacket to her nude form. She blushed, feeling his eyes sweep over her body.

"Hn," he glanced at his watch, noting the time. He sighed, agitated, getting up from the small chair. He frowned as he looked her over, his long, lean legs elegantly striding out the room, leaving Rin temporarily shocked.

Rin knit her brows as she watched him leave, flinching at the sound of the door slamming into the wall. _Did I say something wrong? _

She struggled to get out of the bed, her legs shaking as her feet touched the cold wood. "Anngh," she whimpered, clutching her side, the pain in her pelvis returning. "Shit," she cursed, clenching the bedding with her fist. She took deep breathes, her eyes widening as she felt the pain worsen. Her knees buckled, succumbing to the pain, her form collapsing onto the hard wood floor.

"Kami," tears spilt out, the pain doubled, her breathing jagged._ How pathetic was she_, she thought, struggling to stand back up. Her arms were shaky as she lifted her torso, her head hung low, _fight for him_, she thought bitterly, giving up, resting her forehead against the cool wood, _she couldn't even stand up. _It felt like hours as she laid on the floor, curled up into a small ball. Her side ached with pain, the rest of her body entirely numb.

"Rin?" Sesshomaru entered the bedroom, a tray of food securely in his hands. He looked for her on the bed, "Rin?" He walked closer, finding her tucked to the side of the bed, shivering. "Fuck," he muttered, setting the tray at the foot of the bed. He knelt down beside her, his chest constricting as he saw her form shaking, the tears streaming down her rose dusted cheeks.

"I-I... can't get up," she whispered, twisting his jacket in her hands. "It hurts," she cried, refusing to meet his tempered gaze.

Sesshomaru exhaled deeply, brushing the hair from her face, "Come on," he murmured, gathering her in his arms, his fingers brushing against her warm body, his hold on her secure as he lifted her off the floor. He set her on the bed, bringing the covers over her body. He brought the food tray in front of her, setting it in her lap.

Rin looked down at the tray, fingering the purple petals of the lilac bouquet. _First love, _she thought fondly, wondering if he knew the meaning of the flowers. "Thank you Sesshomaru-sama," she murmured, bowing her head in gratitude, "I'm sorry you keep on finding me on the floor."

Sesshomaru frowned, _Sesshomaru-sama. Sama. Why did that irk him so? _"Eat," he told her, turning his back to the her. He rubbed his face, the need for sleep muddling his thoughts, "I'm going to take a shower," he muttered, striding to the bathroom. He closed the doors, resisting the urge to punch through the wood. For some reason he felt angry, he felt the rage course through his veins, his eyes red with violence.

_Angry at yourself? _He scoffed, looking at himself in the mirror. He trailed his fingers over the scar on his forehead, struggling to think back to the day of the accident. As he closed his eyes he could hear the sharp blare of a horn, bright lights blinding him, his hand wrapped around hers. _Her. _

He gripped the edge of the porcelain sink as he remembered; he remembered holding her that night, her soft lips pressed upon his, her warm body tucked against him throughout the event. He remembered her fingers lacing through his, her voice so melodious, so full of laughter, her eyes so bright, so expressive. _Aishiteru, _he could hear her whispers, her soft giggle, he could visualize her coy smile, tempting him so.

He grimaced as he opened his eyes, the pain in his head almost numbing. He felt something for her, it was undeniable, but love? His gaze settled on his ring finger where he rubbed the bare skin with his thumb. _He used her, _he told himself repeatedly as he disrobed, the cold water sending courses of waves through his spine. He stood still, letting the water soak his body, and closed his eyes once more.

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p><em>Sesshomaru was still as he looked through the glass window, his sight trained on the young woman who fluttered through the shop as if she were a ballerina. She pirouetted as she spun to grab a set of scissors, danced a grand jeté as she jumped over a small chihuahua, and plied as as she bent down to hand the dog a treat. <em>

_She was certainly different, he mused, walking into the shop, the bell chiming as the door swung open and his senses were bombarded with a mixture of floral scents. He smirked as she froze mid-step as their eyes met, her hold on the bouquet slipping, her peach lips parted in shock of his presence. _

_"I myself am not a shop keeper, but I do think a greeting is in order," he spoke low, striding towards her, catching the bouquet before it dropped and set it on the counter. "Don't you think?"_

_The young woman's eyes widened as he took her hand, pressing a firm kiss on her palm, "H-hai," she struggled to speak, her fingers fidgeting with the hem of her sundress as she swallowed her nerves and beamed merrily back at him, "Sesshomaru. I... it's... you're...," she laughed, closing her eyes as she strived to find her composure, "Hi," she replied finally, "Hi." _

_He chuckled, his hold still on her hand, "Hi." He fingered the petals of the rose tucked behind her ear, "Rin. How are you?" He looked deeply into her chocolate orbs, smirking as he noted her pulse quicken. _

_She licked her lips, her tongue daintily moistening her bottom lip, "I'm fine." She shook her head in disbelief, "Great." She struggled to calm herself down, "Peachy." A lie, she thought, her mind yelling at her, urging her to throw her arms around his and admit that she missed him. That she needed him. "Just fantastic," she mumbled, looking away to where Ayame had peeked her head out of the office. She sighed as she caught sight of her thumbs-up, remembering their pep-talk earlier that day, "Yourself?" _

_"Better," he told her, releasing his hold on her as he walked through the shop. It was certainly small, the brick building over fifty years old, but the shop was inviting, cozy, and spilling with various flora. _

_"I need your help," he told her as he picked up a rose, twirling it between his thumb and forefinger, "I'd like to have a bouquet sent to someone." _

_"Oh," Rin's shoulders sagged, her expression pensive. It had been a month, she thought, surely he had moved on, "For someone special?" The ache in her chest grew tight, her hand tightening into fists. She couldn't bear the thought of another woman with him, another woman pressing her lips against his, another woman laying beside him as he slept._

_Sesshomaru raised his brow, "Very." He gestured to the room, "What do you suggest?" _

_"Um," Rin was frozen, her worst fears confirmed. Was he really so cruel to have her pick flowers for his new lover? She was hesitant as she walked next to him, trying to concentrate on the task at hand. Kami help her, she thought as she bent down onto her knees and began to rifle through the various bunches. _

_"Well it depends on what you're trying to say. Whether it's friendship, grievance, family, or romance..." she peaked up at him, his face expressionless. She trailed off, turning her gaze to the gardenia, "Like this," she picked the largest flower, handing it to him to hold, "The gardenia means joy." She then turned to pick a yellow chrysanthemum, "Or this means secret admirer." _

_"Hn," Sesshomaru set the gardenia down, looking over the rest of the shop, "How about the roses?" _

_"The roses," Rin repeated mechanically, her heart aching as she remembered how he had given her roses on their first official date. She struggled to stifle her tears as she glided towards the colorful blooms, "Um," she began, picking three from the large vase, "Well there's pink for friendship, white for purity, and red for..." she lingered, playing with the stem, stroking the silky red petals._

_"Love," Sesshomaru spoke, startling Rin as she turned around to find him directly behind her, "You always seem so startled by my presence," he murmured, caressing her rose-dusted cheeks, "Do I scare you Rin?" _

_"I," Rin stepped back, her heart sinking into the pit of her stomach. She clutched the flower to her chest, her gaze wavering, "Yes." _

_Sesshomaru chuckled; never had he met someone so honest with her feelings. He wondered if she knew that she wore her heart so easily on her sleeves, "What are you scared of Rin?" _

_She replied quietly as she looked away, "You." She dropped the flower back in its place, "I'm terrified by what you make me feel." _

_"What do you feel?" he asked as he took a bold step forward, "Do you feel that pull? That need for my hand in yours?" He cupped her chin, gazing deeply into her eyes, "The want for me? The same that I have for you?"_

_Tears brimmed around Rin's eyes, "Yes." She whimpered as she felt his arms encircle her waist, holding her close, "I want to be with you Sesshomaru," she admitted; those words music to his ears. She laid her head against his chest, his heartbeat pacifying her nerves, "So badly." She fisted his shirt in her hands, struggling to contain herself. "I want to be able to hug you and kiss you and call you my boyfriend. I want to be able to call you at three in the morning because I had a nightmare, to be able to throw my arms around you and declare to the world that I'm falling in love with you. I want it," she wiped the tears that continued to fall, "I want it so badly." She sniffed, letting go of her hold on him, "But I can't be what you need," she whispered, trying to convince herself to let him go,"I tried once and I just can't." I failed. _

_Sesshomaru brought his hand up, brushing the hair from her face, "And what is it exactly that you think I need?" _

_"I don't know," she tucked her bangs to the side, "I..." She stomped her foot angrily against the hardwood floors, "You're Sesshomaru Takahashi. Heir to a realty empire, son of Japan's former beauty queen and real-estate magnate. You're in the public eye so often and god," she sniffed, "I'm a nobody. I don't even know what my parents did for a living. Kami Sesshomaru, why didn't you ever tell me?" _

_"I thought you knew," he murmured, wiping away her tears, "I thought you knew who I was."_

_"Well I didn't," she cursed, "I never knew who you really were. I thought you were a normal guy, with a normal job, and normal friends. I thought you worked with Kouga or something, I don't know." She shook her head, angry at herself for falling for him so heedlessly, "I don't know what I thought." She refused to meet his gaze as she spoke, giving into his hold on her waist. "Well for one thing," she muttered bitterly, tucking her head underneath his chin as she wiped her runny nose, "You need someone who's capable of using the right fork at dinner." _

_Sesshomaru smirked as his hold on her tightened, pressing a kiss onto her crown, "You need a socialite, a model, someone, someone else. Someone who's well-educated, well-spoken and drop dead gorgeous. That's not me." She clenched her fists, angry with herself for being so inadequate, "I can't go to those fancy dinners and hold conversations with your business partners. I can't," the tears fell freely, soaking through his white shirt, "I can't pretend to be what you need." _

_"Your definition of what I need is much different from mine," he told her, "What I need is simple. I could care less if you use a spoon to cut your meat, if you have flowers in your hair, or if you hate those unnecessarily tedious dinners. As long as I have you." He wiped away the tears from her eyes, "Do you understand?" _

_She shook her head, "No." She moaned as she felt his lips brush against hers, "I don't." And I never will. He was too good for her. He was like a dream come true."But then again," she melted in his arms as their lips touched again, "I don't understand why I like you so much either." _

_He chuckled, cradling her head in his hands, "You never answered any of my calls." _

_"I couldn't." She squeezed the hand cupping her cheek, "You deserve better than me Sesshomaru."_

_"If anything," he pressed his lips softly against hers once more, savoring the taste. Oh how he missed having her in his arms, "It is you who deserves better. I however, am much too selfish to let you go." _

_She laughed, shaking her head in disagreement, "I missed you," she stood up on her tiptoes, pressing a kiss to his chin. "I wanted to call you every time something came to my apartment. But I..." she gave a resigned sigh, she could still hear those malicious words coming from the mouthes of the wives, those vicious comments about her status and their relationship. _

_"Are you sure?" She gazed back at him, her doe eyes clouded with fear, "I don't want to be a burden to you." I don't want to get hurt, she thought, gripping his fingers tight. _

_He kissed her forehead, "You dare to question this Sesshomaru?"_

_"Never," she murmured, so this was her fate, she thought, relishing the feel of his arms wrapped around her. "I trust you." _

_"Good," he kissed her once more, taking his time, plying her lips with his, pulling back only to take a breath, "I promise to never hurt you."_

_Rin smiled as their hands found one another, "I loved the two headed dragon you had sent to my apartment last week," she whispered, "I can't believe you found one," she giggled, tucking back her loose curls."And just between you and I, I've slept with it every night since." _

_He raised his brow, how she delighted him, "Out of all the things I sent, that worked?" _

_"Actually," she looked up bashfully, "You had me at the chocolate covered strawberries." _

_He laughed, wrapping his arms around her and lifted her up, her arms wrapping arounds his neck, "Rin Yamamoto, will you be my girlfriend," he asked, the sides of his lips curling, "Again?" _

_She giggled, "Yes. Sesshomaru Takahashi, I will be your girlfriend, again." _

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru sighed as he stepped out of the shower, his feet firmly planted on the tiled floor. His mind ran through the memories as he toweled himself off, he remembered bits and pieces, yet nothing concrete. He struggled to remember everything, for if he did, perhaps everything would make sense.<p>

He turned his head to the right, his eyes narrowing at the sight of a set of jewels on the tiled floor in front of the large mirror. He walked towards it, noting the spot was where Rin had fallen. He frowned as he picked her ring off of the floor, his gaze to the double doors. He fingered the gold band, the cool metal warming at his touch. _Her wedding band,_ he thought, setting it onto the bathroom counter.

He looked away from the diamond ring, urging himself to move on. He quickly pulled on a navy sweater and black pants, running his hand over the top of his head. _No need to dry his hair, _he thought bitterly, shoving the ring into his pocket. He pushed through the bathroom doors, frowning as he found Rin slumped against the pillows, her eyes shut, her meal untouched. _Why aren't you eating? _He kept his steps silent as he walked towards her, his eyes trailing over her frail figure. She was so small, he thought, raising his hand to glide his fingers over her cheek. She whimpered as she turned her head into his palm, a single tear running down from her ebony lashes. When he removed his hand her eyes began to flutter, her gaze heavy as they focused in the dark room.

"You didn't eat," he finally spoke, looking straight into her eyes, "Why?" Rin was silent, lying listlessly on the silk sheets. Her expression was blank, her eyes lacking their vivid glow, "Why aren't you eating?" he demanded an answer.

Rin looked away, pushing the tray away, "I can't." Her voice was scratchy, her lips chapped.

His eyes narrowed on the food, "Is it not to your liking?"

"I can't eat." She blinked back the tears, her hands shaking as she tried to explain, "It makes me sick."

"Or do you make yourself sick?" He snarled, his tone no longer light, "Are you starving yourself?" he was accusatory, cursing as she said nothing, as she refused to look his way. "Speak goddamnit!" He struggled to cool his temper, to resist the urge to wring her form, "Look the fuck at me when I speak to you!"

Her eyes widened in fear, never had he spoke in such a harsh tone towards her, "I..." She winced at his words, _was she starving herself?_ "I have to be perfect," she whispered, gazing longingly at her ring finer, "The wife of a Takahashi must be perfect."

"And you think that fainting in the bathroom is a perfect act? Do you think that their wives faint in the middle of dinner?" His voice dripped with malice, "Do you truly think that feigning your pitiful little illness will make me wondrously fall for you? You're pathetic," his words were venomous, cutting through her already broken heart, "You're so naive it disgusts me."

"Stop it!" She pleaded, tears flowing freely, "Stop being so... kami," her fingers gripped the blankets, "Please," she knew she sounded so feeble, so pathetic, "I just want _you_ back."

He said nothing, his jaw tense as he turned his back on her once again. He closed his eyes, gripping her ring tight. He cursed as the lights seemed to brighten, as his vision cleared. He could see her dancing in a meadow, her orange dress extended out as she spun. He could hear her laugh, feel her light touches. _My Maru. _She called out to him, extending her hand at a distance.

"Sesshomaru," Rin's voice trembled with apprehension as she called out to him, pulling him back from his reverie, "Just tell me one thing," she pleaded, "Please."

He opened his eyes, his vision glossed over and tinted red.

Rin swallowed dryly, taking his rigid form as a cue to begin, "Do you remember me?" _Do you remember holding me? Do you remember kissing me? Loving me? _

His nostrils flared in anger, his fingers curling against her ring in his pocket. He sneered in response, his footsteps heavy as he strode out of the room, the doors slamming hard against the wood.

Rin hung her head low, bringing her knees to her chest as she cried. She flung the dishes onto the floor, her nerves inflamed as the glass broke into pieces, the warm soup spattering viciously onto the bedding. "He never loved you," she told herself, rocking herself as she wept, "Never."

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru paced across the grass, his mind in a tumultuous battle between the past and the present. <em>Do you remember me? <em>Her voice haunted his thoughts, her presence constant in his mind. He sighed as he neared the lake's edge, leaning against the large cherry blossom tree. _Do you remember me? _Did he? Did he truly remember all of her?

"Why is it that you constantly find the need to hurt the only woman you've ever loved?"

Sesshomaru tensed, a chill running down his spine. "I know not of what you speak."

"No?" The figure stepped into the moonlight, "Perhaps then you can explain to me why I didn't see Rin at dinner."

Sesshomaru glared, offended by the person's very presence, "She's ill."

"Did you harm her?" The comment was backhanded, "Because I sure as hell wouldn't put it above you."

Sesshomaru snarled, "And who are you to judge me?"

"Your brother." Inuyasha folded his arms, "Your room is next to mine. I could hear Rin crying so Kagome and I went to check up on her." He snorted in disgust, remembering the bruises on her waist, her legs, the cut on her forehead, "She's not your fucking punching bag."

Sesshomaru raised his brow, "You truly think I beat her?"

"Like I said, I wouldn't put it above you." He glanced over at Sesshomaru, "She said she just fell but with you around, I wouldn't be surprised if she was pushed."

Sesshomaru held his tongue, keeping his anger in check. It would not bode well to have an argument at the retreat. "Hn." He looked out at the lake, "Why are you here then? To give me a lecture on how to treat my wife?"

Inuyasha shrugged, "Like I said, I'm your brother. And as much as you hate to admit it, I know you better than you know yourself right now."

Sesshomaru growled, throwing a rock into the lake, "Half-brother."

Inuyasha smirked, "Of course. The good ol' half-brother comment. But hey, at least you're showing some emotion." He stuffed his hands into his grey sweats, "Look Sesshomaru, as much as it's hard to believe, you and I became closer as your relationship with Rin progressed." He laughed, reminiscing, kicking a pebble into the water, "She had you wrapped around her little finger. You would have done anything to make her happy, and that included us being civil to one another."

Sesshomaru scoffed, rolling his eyes, "Unlikely." He bowed down to no one.

"Really?" He turned to face Sesshomaru, "Do you truly believe that if you had married Rin under such false terms you would have acted the way you did? Like a lovesick puppy chasing after his bone? If you actually did marry Rin for money, you would have cared less about pleasing her every whim. You would have given her as little as she needed and considering that you were the first man in her life, she wouldn't have known otherwise. If you really hated her presence, her every being, you would have never taken her on your overseas business meetings, you wouldn't have asked her to move in to your penthouse three months in, and you sure as hell wouldn't dare to be so affectionate with her."

Sesshomaru sneered, "Perhaps I found that she needed more than the occasional peck on the cheek to keep her satisfied with our relationship."

"Or perhaps you fell head over heels in love with her." Inuyasha snickered, finding Sesshomaru's expression of rage comical, "Check your briefcase when you get back in and tell me why a man who married his wife for money keeps pictures of her for when he goes away on business."

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>"Open," Kagome held the spoon up to Rin's lips, "Rin," her voice was stern, giving her a look until her lips parted and she pushed the soup into her mouth, "Good," she cooed, setting it down back into the bowl.<p>

Rin sighed, swallowing it in one bug gulp, "Kagome, you really don't have to spoon feed me."

"No? Fine," she handed Rin the bowl, "But I'm not leaving until that bowl's empty."

Rin gagged, the smell of the ginger making her nauseous. "Nngh," she leant back into the pillows, "I don't need a babysitter you know."

"Maybe not, but you need a sister." She patted Rin's hand comfortingly, "So I'm here."

Rin gave a small smile in gratitude, chiding herself for being so unpleasant, "I'm sorry for being so cranky Kagome. Thank you for being here."

"Of course," Kagome scooted her chair closer, turning to face the maid, "Thank you for cleaning up the mess." She waved her hands airily, placing the blame upon herself, "I'm such a klutz sometimes."

"Of course Mrs. Takahashi," the maid curtsied, "It is my pleasure." She bowed once more as she gathered her cleaning supplies and left the room, closing the doors behind her.

Kagome watched as the maid left, turning to face Rin as she studied her figure. "So why aren't you eating?" Her voice was soft, filled with concern.

Rin peaked up at Kagome, "You're just going for the big question aren't you?"

"Well, I am a doctor. That's my job."

"Right," Rin sighed, oh how she admired Kagome's strength and confidence. Kagome was one of the women she had tried so hard to emulate. Someone so beautiful, so intelligent, and so incredibly kind-hearted that everyone couldn't help but love. "I don't think you'll understand," she murmured, looking to Kagome's belly. She hated herself for the feelings of envy, of want, bubbling up for the things that Kagome had. _A loving husband by her side, surrounded by her friends, her first-born due in three months. She had everything that Rin had spent a decade dreaming of. _

"Try me."

Rin struggled to put her thoughts into words, "He..." she looked to the door, remembering his callous words that stung, "Sesshomaru only married me because I was an asset to his company. For some reason, I helped his company grow. He didn't love me. He didn't even care for me. The only thing he valued about me was my ability to be the cute little housewife. Nothing more." She rubbed her thumb over her ring finger, reminiscing of those days when she had been so happy, _had she really been so blind? _

"I'm a Takahashi," she told herself, _even if only for a year,_ "I have to look the part, right? And that means looking perfect."

Kagome knit her brow, "Rin,"

"You don't get it Kagome!" Rin wiped away the tears in her eyes, "You don't understand because you're already so perfect. You're a doctor. You graduated top of your class, even beating out Yasha. You're so pretty, so confident, so everything." She hung her head, "Me?" Her voice cracked as she continued, "I struggled to finish high school. I failed half of my classes. I arrange flowers for my living while you save lives. I can't even compare to you."

"No! Rin, stop it. You weren't diagnosed with dyslexia until recently. If the doctors had caught on earlier you would have done so well in school. Your as bright as anyone I know."

Rin held her head low, "It doesn't matter. Maybe I'm the cute little wife that everyone finds endearing, but I'm not that beautiful, elegant woman he needs. I knew that, he knew that, and I'm pretty damn sure everyone else knew that. I tried Kagome, when we were married, I tried to be that woman." She laughed at her naivety, "I thought that wearing those fancy dresses made me so beautiful, so elegant, but it was just the little girl playing dress up, wasn't it?"

"Rin, stop it!" Kagome shook her head furiously, "Stop undervaluing yourself. You're so beautiful, inside and out. And you sure as hell don't need to lose anymore weight."

"I have to," Rin murmured, affirming her decision, "I gained fifteen pounds when I was pregnant. I have to be perfect," she muttered the last part over, "I have to be perfect."

"Rin," Kagome was crying now, clutching her hand, "Goddamnit, stop trying to be perfect and concentrate on getting better. You need to eat, you need to stop being so negative and get back to being you. The Rin we all know and love. The Rin that was always so happy, so cheerful, and always smiling. You loved to bake, you loved working at your flower shop, and you loved to eat. The Rin that loved to laugh and most of all, that loved life to the fullest."

Rin teared up, "I loved my life with Sesshomaru."

"Then fight for him." Kagome laughed at Rin's expression, "You were married to him Rin. You know as well as I how stubborn he is." She sighed, hesitating to continue, "I talked to the surgeon before we came up today and he told me about the damage to Sesshomaru's brain. It was an extensive surgery, but they managed to keep it all in tact. There was just a blood clot that they needed to remove. So it's a safe bet that while Sesshomaru doesn't remember the last three years of his life now, he will in time. Yasha told me that when he awoke for the first time, he thought it was 2008. That's a year before he met you. So right now, he's probably really confused."

"What does it matter anymore?"Rin shrugged her shoulders, _it was all a lie anyways._ "In a year I'll be gone from his life and he'll remarry. He'll have the perfect life with someone else."

"But he's yours. Hmm," Kagome stood up from her seat and began to search through his belongings, "Look!" She held up the phone triumphantly, marching back to the side of the bed. She grinned as she showed Rin the home screen, "He had a week to change his background, so why is it still a picture of you and him in Greece?"

"I," Rin took the phone, gazing at the photo, "Maybe he doesn't know how."

Kagome snickered, "Doesn't know how? That man has an IQ of 170. And if he didn't know how, don't you think he would have one of his lackeys do it for him?"

"I..." Rin sighed, "He's not who I married." _Her Maru had never been so violent. So angry. _

"Yet." Kagome's eyes twinkled, "Rin, your whole relationship with Sesshomaru, he wooed you. He took you on vacations, fancy dinners, and bought you presents; the whole nine yards. So now, consider it your turn to woo him."

Rin was taken aback, "Woo him?"

"Yeah," Kagome smiled, patting her hand, "He fell in love with you once right? So make him fall for you again. _Help_ him remember you."

"I..." Rin stared down at the phone. Her chest tightened as she saw how happy they looked, how happy they had been. It couldn't have _all_ been a lie.

Kagome murmured, "What's there to lose?"

Rin frowned, _nothing. She had nothing left. _"Ok." She could hear that woman's voice, urging her to go on, _fight for him. _She mustered up an ounce of strength to sit up, "I'll try."

"Good," Kagome kissed her cheek, "That's my sister. I'm going to head back to bed and as your doctor, I suggest you do the same." She bent down to pick up her purse, drawing out a bag of cookies, "Oh, one more thing! I thought you might like these."

Rin lit up, her eyes falling upon the baked goods, "Chocolate chip?"

"And peanut butter. Don't worry," she set them on Rin's lap, "It's from my mum."

"Thanks Kagome," Rin embraced Kagome, "You're the best."

"That's what family is for silly," Kagome patted her head, "Sweet dreams." She tiptoed out of the room, closing the doors.

"Sweet dreams," Rin smiled as she plucked a cookie from the batch, smelling its sweet scent. "So yummy," she muttered, finishing the piece in a quick bite. "Mm," she ate one more before she settled in the bed. She yawned as she laid her head against the pillow, looking over to the balcony doors where a small sliver of the moon shone onto the hardwood floors. She clutched the bag in her hands, her lids heavy, her breathing slowed as she drifted to sleep, unaware of the steps leading into the bedroom.

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru sighed as he pushed through the heavy oak doors, Inuyasha's words playing through his mind like a recorder. Did he truly keep pictures of her in his briefcase? <em>Absurd. <em>His gaze set on Rin as he neared his luggage, keeping quiet as to not wake her from her slumber. He gently laid the briefcase at the foot of the bed, opening it with a quick flick of his wrists. He searched through the documents, opening various letters and looked through the inner pockets, none holding the photos. He snorted, reaching to close the top before something caught his eye.

_A secret compartment, _he reached into the pocket, pulling out a clear sleeve. He sat on the mattress, knitting his brows as he looked over the photos. There were three photos in the sleeve, the first of Rin in her wedding dress, overlooking the night sky. The second was of Rin sleeping on a bright orange pillow, her long hair covering the pillowcase, her lips parted, her cheeks full and softly flushed. She looked ethereal, so _beautiful. _He sighed, pulling out the last photo, tensing at the image, _a sonogram. _He flipped it over immediatly, the feelings of uneasiness running rampant.

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p><em>Rin giggled through the phone, tying a bow around a bouquet of daffodils with one hand, "Did you get my present?" <em>

_"I did," Sesshomaru stepped out his hotel room, breathing in the crisp fall air,"Thank you."_

_"You're welcome." She twirled the phone cord in her hand, "Did you like it?"_

_"Indeed." He took a sip of his wine, setting it on the ledge of the balcony, "You're 10 weeks now, aren't you?" He held the photo in his hand, running his finger over the baby's features. Kami, how he missed her. Only three days without her in his arms and he missed her. _

_"As of yesterday," Rin sat on the small stool, kicking her feet to and fro. "Don't you think it kind of looks like an alien?" _

_Sesshomaru chuckled low, "You think our child looks like an alien?"_

_"Yeah! Did you see the size of its head?" She jumped up from her seat and bent down to pluck a piece of tissue paper from behind the counter, "Well I guess it just has a big head like its daddy," she teased gently. _

_"I feel as if I should be offended," he replied, tucking the photo into his pocket. _

_"No! Never ever; I love your head." She laughed, taking a sip of her water bottle,"Even if it's huge." _

_He shook his head, thoroughly amused, moving to sit on the bamboo chaise, "How is your day going so far?" _

_"Fantastic! Your mum and I went to breakfast before the appointment and it was so yummy. I got this crepe and it was ginormous! I feel bad that I ate it all but it was so delicious, I couldn't help it. Then we went to the doctor's appointment and that went excellent! The baby's on course and he gave me a note to give to you." _

_"Oh really?" He raised his brow, "What exactly did this note say?" _

_"That your wife can have as much ice cream as she wants." She grinned, "Especially chocolate." _

_"Of course," he murmured, mentally taking a note to pick her up a tub on his way back from the airport,"Are you still feeling sick in the morning?"_

_"Nope," she lined the vase with the pink tissue, "Thank goodness. I guess it was a four week thing." She rested her head against her hand, looking longingly at the couple that had stepped into the shop, "I miss you," she whispered, her tone hushed._

_"And I you," he unbuttoned his blazer and uncuffed his shirt, "I'll be home tomorrow." _

_"Promise?"_

_He smirked, leaning his head against the soft back of the chair, "I promise." _

_"Ok, I'll talk to you later." she held the phone to her ear, allowing herself a moment to hang up, "I love you." She waited three seconds; no reply. She could hear his exhale and the rustling of his shirt before she pressed the button to end the call. _

_Sesshomaru stared at his phone, the small icon of Rin dressed in a blue hoodie and her hair tied back into pigtails beaming back at him. He still couldn't say it, he thought, playing with his wedding band. She was having his child and yet he still struggled to say those words. He missed her. That was enough for now. Maybe tomorrow, he'd finally say it. He'd finally let her know how he truly felt. How she completed him. _

_Aishiteru. _

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru's eyes wandered over the back of the photo, his fingers absentmindedly running over the cursive writing in blue ink. 'Baby misses you too.'<p>

"Fuck," he threw the photos into his briefcase, massaging his forehead. His head ached, he felt like he was suffocating, finding it hard to breath. He stripped the sweater from his toned form, folding it neatly and set in onto the nearby chair. He walked up to the bed, studying Rin as she slept. Her eyes fluttered erratically, her hair softly curled and spilled around her like a halo. She was pouting, her body warm and flush, her hand clutching a small bag. _She looked exactly like she did in the photo._

His lips quirked as he reached down, slowly loosening Rin's grasp from the bag and set it on the nightstand. _Cookies, _he thought, _so she finally ate. _He sighed, moving the blankets to settle in the bed next to her. He kept to his side of the bed, looking over to her every few minutes. He soon drifted to sleep, his mind hazy, dreaming of the woman in the photos.

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru woke hours later, finding himself in the middle of the bed, a small, warm form tucked next to him. He exhaled sharply, tensing as he felt her move, her toes brushing against his calf. Their legs were intertwined, her soft breathing barely audible. He frowned as he found Rin's hand clutched in his, her head buried in his shoulder. His arm had wrapped around her, pulling her close to him. <em>Why didn't this feel wrong, <em>he asked himself, pushing back soft tendrils of her hair,_ why did it feel so right? Why did it feel so natural for her warm body to meld with his as they slept, for their hands and legs to be intertwined, for her soft twitches to be so comforting? _

Rin moaned softly, almost smiling in her sleep. He wondered what she dreamt of, _do you still dream of me? _

_Stop fighting it, _he could hear Akemi's voice coax him back to sleep, _your love for her runs deep. Even in sleep, you found each other. _

He sighed, he couldn't deny it. There was something about this _girl _that made him so temperamental. So foolish. _He should let her go, _he thought, clutching her closer, but he couldn't. He couldn't let her go. _Was this girl truly his everything?_

"Maru?" Rin began to stir, hazel orbs adjusting to the light that shone through the balcony doors, "You,"

"Shh," Sesshomaru pressed his lips against her forehead, rubbing circles against her back, soothing her worries, her fears, "Go back to sleep."

"Mm," Rin's eyes closed, comforted by his warm touch, "Okay," she yawned, snuggling deeper into his embrace.

He laid his head back against the pillows, feeling defeated, feeling exhausted.

_You'll remember her, _Akemi's soft voice drifted through like the wind, assuring him, _you'll remember your love soon enough. _

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p><em>xoxo<em>

_tuille_


	12. Chapter 12

chapter 12.

it's been awhile, hasn't it? :P

disclaimer: all that you recognize, i do not own.

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Rin yawned as she woke up, shifting around the luxurious bed. She pressed her cheek against the warm, taut body next to her, squeezing her eyes shut. She smiled as she heard the cheerful tweets of the songbirds outside, languidly opening her eyes. She moaned as she arched her back, rubbing her neck as she sat up. She looked over to her left, her countenance lifting as she spotted Sesshomaru's warm body next to her. He slept on his side, his arm lying across her lap. His skin was white marble, his expression content, almost happy as he slept.<p>

"Good morning," she whispered, ducking low. Her fingers gently clutched his shoulder as she giggled, leaning in to brush her lips against his.

"Wake up Maru," she murmured, pressing a quick kiss on his jaw. "Sesshomaru? Wake-" She quirked her head to the side, tensing as she noticed the scar that ran across his forehead. She slowly pulled back, her smile falling, _so it wasn't a horrid, terrible dream. _She bit her lip, her eyes closing in disappointment,_ this wasn't her Sesshomaru._

She hung her head, her eyes misting as she clenched her fists. _He's not my Sesshomaru._ _This_ man no longer smiled, no longer laughed, no longer held her hand. She looked to his hand, his ring finger bare, _hell, did he ever care for her? _The scar on his forehead was fading, hints of silver hair growing. _He even smelt different. _She swallowed as she lowered her shoulders, daring to touch his face once more. She traced the scar with her finger, _he looks so peaceful when he sleeps. _

"I miss you," she whispered, her heart constricting, tighter and tighter with every word, every memory. She struggled to look away, to tear her fingers from his warm skin. She exhaled deeply as she gave him one last look, pressing a kiss onto her fingers before touching his cheek. She lifted the heavy comforter off of her form and tiptoed out of the bed, turning back to cover Sesshomaru with the blanket. She leant in to kiss his forehead, _just once more, _she thought, running her thumb against her ring finger.

She walked along the bed, her fingers gliding over the soft cotton. She stopped at the foot of the bed, her shoulders falling as she gazed at the leather briefcase sitting against the wooden bedpost. She pursed her lips as she remembered the days when she had hid notes and silly gifts inside. _Did you ever read them? _She wondered, taking a seat on the king-sized bed, _did you ever smile when you found them? _She looked back to him,_ did you ever miss me when you were away? _

She bit her lip as she set the briefcase horizontal onto the bed, butterflies fluttering in her stomach. She pushed the locks and lifted the brown fold to reveal the inner pockets. Her hand shook as she pulled out a small polaroid, her heart stopping as she looked at the photo.

_It's me, _she thought, her mind in shock. _He kept this? _She flipped over the photo, running her fingers over her bubbly cursive writing.

'So you can sleep at night. - Forever Yours, Rin'

She clutched the photo to her chest, _he kept it. _Her heart began to beat faster, goosebumps running up her arm, _he kept it._

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p><em>Rin smiled as the kiss lingered, his hold on her waist tightening, "I'll miss you," she whispered, nuzzling her nose against his.<em>

_"Fuck it," Sesshomaru cursed, moving to rest his forehead against hers, "Just come with me." _

_She giggled, "I can't," her nimble fingers moved to fix his tie, "Not all of us can take time off of work to go to Hawaii."_

_He growled, playfully nipping her ear, "If this trip were truly for pleasure you would be setting next to me on this godforsaken 22 hour flight and not some wrinkly, old capitalistic bastard." _

_"I don't know," she sang, "Mr. Hinnai might look awfully darling in a two-piece bathing suit."_

_Sesshomaru paled, "You're making me nauseous and I haven't even boarded." _

_The loudspeakers chimed, alraming Rin for a brief moment before a robotic female voice began to speak, "Attention. First class passengers of Fligh J277 will begin boarding immediatly in gate F2. I repeat, gate F2."_

_Rin pouted, her doe eyes moistening, "That's you," she murmured, wrapping her arms around his torso._

_He sighed, resting his chin atop of hers, "That's me. Hn, seven days without me," he chuckled, "Do you think you can handle that?"_

_"Of course I can," she looked back at him, a glimmer of determination in her eyes, "Can you?"_

_"I think I can manage seven days without your midnight twitches." _

_She laughed, rubbing his back as she laid her head against him, "I'm going to miss you." _

_"As I will miss you," he brushed his lips against hers once more, "Sleep well, drink juice and don't trip up the stairs." _

_She nodded grimly, "Maybe I'll fix that step while you're gone." _

_"I'll have Jaken do it." He pressed his lips to her forehead before he released his hold from her. Rin shivered, already missing his warmth. "Have a safe flight," she spoke softly, leaning up onto her tiptoes to kiss him once more, "Wait," she brought his head down lower, whispering now, "I need seven goodnight kisses." _

_He smiled, "It only make sense." He savored each brush of her soft lips against his, the feel of her young, nubile body warm against his. When they parted he moved to gather his briefcase from the windowsill. "I'll call you when I land."_

_"Ok," Rin nodded her head, her soft curls bouncing as she did, "I'll hold the fort down back home."_

_Sesshomaru paused as he laid his jacket onto his arm; home. He looked back to Rin, running his eyes over her petite body, her raven tresses, her ruby lips, her doe eyes that seemed much too large for her face. Yes, he thought, bending down to kiss her forehead, she was his home._

_As he boarded the flight he looked back to the airport where he saw Rin waiting by the window. She blew a kiss, giggling as she did, wondering how ridiculous she must have looked. When he was seated he shifted uncomfortably in the leather seat, already counting down the hours of the Trans-Pacific flight. _

_It wasn't until Sesshomaru reached his suite did he lift open his briefcase and find the present Rin had hidden inside. He cocked a brow as he opened the ribbon-wrapped envelope, emptying the contents onto the king-sized bed. He laughed as he held up a piece of gum, a chocolate coin, a friendship bracelet and then the piece de resistance - a photo of Rin as she slept. He shook his head, placing the photo onto the pillow next to him. "Only you," he thought, smiling as he peeled the chocolate wrapper from its confines, "Only you."_

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Rin set the photo on her lap, smiling as she remembered those seven goodnight kisses. <em>You kept it, <em>she thought, _why? _She had given him the photo seven months into their relationship. He had left to New York for a quick business trip. It was meant to be a silly gift, an homage to their quirky relationship. "You kept it," she whispered, fingering the edges of the photo. The picture looked worn, a splash of red wine on the left edge.

The edges of her lips quirked as she whipped her head back, "What else did you keep?" she asked his still sleeping form. She moved to sit on the bed and reached into the leather satchel, pulling out another photograph. _It was a photo of her in her wedding dress_. She lifted her knees to her chest as she gazed down at the photo, feeling her eyes mist, _she looked so happy, so vibrant, so full of joy. _

She turned her head, "You had this in your briefcase?" She had never given him this photo, _he must have kept it himself. _She rubbed her temples, the pain shooting in her forehead, _she was so confused._

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p><em>Rin smiled as she laced her hand through his, resting her head against his arm. "Today was perfect," she murmured, giggling at the touch of the dewy grass against her bare feet. <em>

_Sesshomaru nodded, leaning down to kiss the top of her chocolate tresses, "Indeed." He looked towards the sunset, "It was a beautiful ceremony." _

_Rin grinned, "And now you're mine," she pulled away to face him, "Forever." _

_"Forever?" Sesshomaru raised his brow playfully, "I don't know if I could be married to such a horrid cook for forever." _

_She squealed, "Me?" She threw her head back in laughter, "So says the man who can't boil water!" _

_He chuckled, pulling her into his warm embrace, "Agree to disagree." _

_She shook her head, "Only because I love you." She grinned, playing with his bow tie. They were finally married, she thought, resting her head against his chest as they swayed with the wind._

_He smirked as he lifted her chin, running a finger down her flushed cheeks, "I can't wait to make love to you tonight," he spoke low, his voice smooth and seductive._

_She blushed, "Will you tell me where we're going yet?" _

_He smiled as he pecked her lips, "Europe." He thought back to the two plane tickets to a private estate in the Seychelles. She'll love it there, he thought, playing with her ring finger. _

_"I," Rin faltered in her step, "Well that's kinda broad." _

_He laughed, "You'll enjoy it immensely," he brushed his lips against hers, "Trust me." He took her hand once more as they continued their walk down the path to the meadow. "Do you think that photographer is taking photos of us walking?" _

_"I think so," Rin peaked back and saw the photographer and his team setting up a tripod, "They're quite thorough." _

_He raised his brow, "Thorough?"_

_"Very." Rin nodded her head, taking her time as she skipped up onto a small boulder, "He took hundreds of photos of me getting ready." _

_"Really?" He ran his hand down her back, bringing her back down to him. "Tell me," he looked her over in her dress, searching for a hint of blue. She looks exquisite, he thought, absolutely breathtaking. "What exactly is your something blue?"_

_Rin bit her lip, thinking to the lace negligee underneath her dress, "Oh, wouldn't you like to know," she teased, leaning in to nuzzle his chest._

_"Very well then," He ran his fingers through her silk-like tresses, "Your something old?"_

_She held a hand to her necklace, brushing her fingertips against the silver locket, "My mom's jewelry." She looked at the pendant, opening it with her fingertips, "It's..." She blinked back tears, "It's like my family was here."_

_Sesshomaru squeezed her hand comfortingly as he looked at the locket, knowing that it was the only photo she had left of her family. The picture was of Rin and her family at the beach, her father holding her as she smiled widely, showing off her missing front teeth. Her brother stood next to their mother, holding her hand, also smiling. Her mother looked beautiful in a white, airy dress, a content expression on her face as the sun set behind them. He looked back to Rin, seeing the tears well up, "They would have loved to be here."_

_Rin gave him a watery smile, nodding in agreement, "They would have loved you." Her voice broke, her lips quivering, "I'm sorry, I think this is the eleventh time I've cried today."_

_Sesshomaru held her close, brushing a soft kiss on her forehead, "Never apologize for crying," he told her, "Never apologize for being,"_

_"A crybaby?" Rin mumbled, wiping away the moisture from the sides of her eyes._

_He chuckled, "For being you." He tucked the loose curls behind her ear, "For being my wife." _

_She giggled, "I'll try." She wrapped her arms around him, "Thank you," she whispered, resting her head against him, "For always being my rock." She let out a breath, looking up at his honey gaze, "For being my everything." _

_He took her lips, taking his time with each touch, each caress. When they pulled apart he took a moment to kiss her rings, "I'm yours forever," he promised, pressing his lips to her wrist._

_"Forever," Rin echoed, her smile widening, "Just as I'll forever be yours."_

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Rin released her hold on the photo, watching with watery eyes as the print fell onto the cotton sheets. "Forever," she whispered, turning her head away. Her eyes ran over his leather suitcase, his three-piece suit that hung on the wardrobe. "Who knew that forever would be a year," she murmured, closing her eyes. She turned her head to the bed and smiled, running her fingers over her pajama bottoms, "You're an incredibly frustrating man," she told him, "One day I think you hate me and then the next, I find these photos." She laughed, licking her lips, "But love is supposed to be hard, right?"<p>

She struggled to blink back her tears, "Kami," she held a hand to her chest, "But what if you don't remember me?" She felt her jaw tremble at the mere thought, "What if you never loved me?" She took the photo and placed it back into the briefcase. She set it upright and looked away, feeling nauseous, feeling anxious.

Her breath hitched as she looked back to the briefcase, _did she dare to check it again? _Deep down inside she knew what the last photo was; she had given it to him only weeks before. _Did you keep it? _She paced her breaths as she pulled out the last photo, tears welling up at the mere sight of the black background. _The sonogram. _The white figure in the centre took her breath away, made her chest tighten, her eyes well up. _Takahiro. _She cursed, furiously wiping away the tears. _Of course you kept it, _she thought as she rocked herself on the bed. She wept, remembering how happy he was, how happy _they_ were.

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p><em>Sesshomaru hung his coat up in the closet, closing the white doors afterwards. He walked through the hall, his footsteps on the hardwood barely audible. "Rin?" He called out, loosening his tie, "Are you sleeping? We have a dinner engagement in forty minutes."<em>

_Rin peaked around the kitchen, smiling as she met him halfway, "Nope!" She handed him a cupcake as she pecked him briefly on the lips, "I'm baking."_

_He hesitantly looked at the pastry in his hand, "I can see." _

_She giggled, noting the look on his face. "The baby was hungry for sweets," she explained, wrapping her arms around his neck. "And you know I can't say no to my baby." She beamed as she turned back to the kitchen, skipping over the hardwood floors. "I have six more to do before I'll get ready." She picked up the spatula from the bowl of icing and held up a bare cake. She looked over to him, "Care to help?"_

_Sesshomaru leant against the wall as he watched her ice the pastry, "And miss the show?" He smiled, tucking his hand in his pocket. He pushed himself off and strode towards her, his long, strong arms wrapping around her small waist. "So was it the baby that craved cupcakes," he murmured, resting his chin atop of her head, "Or you?"_

_She laughed, tilting her head back. She grinned naughtily, "You caught me." _

_"Hn," Sesshomaru kissed her forehead, "The doctor did suggest that you limit your intake of sweets."_

_She pouted, "I know, I know. That's why I need you home to control my temptations."_

_He chuckled, kissing her shoulder, "Get ready soon then. We have dinner with my family in thirty minutes." _

_"Oh!" Rin moved away from his embrace and took his hand, leading him to the dining room. "Which is why I made these," she pointed to the silver tray filled with small pink and blue cakes. "What do you think?"_

_The corners of his mouth lifted as he read the message written in pastries, "And baby makes three." _

_"Excellent," she laughed, playing with her hair, "It took me so long to get the letters right. I was kind of worried about an hour ago because I had six A's that look like B's." _

_"And did you eat all six?" He asked, narrowing his eyes at her belly. _

_"No," she swatted his arm playfully, "You should be proud to know I sent them to Jaken." _

_"Self-restraint? I am impressed," he laced his fingers through hers, bringing her hand to his lips, "I'm going to change." _

_ "Okie," she pulled his tie from around his neck. "Don't take too long pretty boy," she teased, unbuttoning the top collar of his dress shirt, "We do only have half-an hour until we need to go."_

_He chuckled, "So says the woman in my Tokyo-U jersey." He looked into her eyes, his brows furrowing as he noticed the slight black smudges around her eyes, "Were you crying?" _

_"Mm," she shrugged, scuffing her heels, "There was a commercial for an animal shelter on the TV while I was waiting for the cupcakes to cool down. They always play the saddest music and then show the saddest puppies and I just want to take them all home." She pouted, resting her forehead against his warm chest,"I think it's the hormones."_

_"Are you certain?" He rubbed the small of her back, "I vaguely remember coming to your apartment one day while we were dating. Weren't you crying because of an order that morning?"_

_She laughed, rubbing her eyes, "Yeah, I remember. I made a wedding bouquet for the cutest bride ever that day. She met her fiancee when they were in grade three and had been together ever since then!" She sighed, "She was so nice and happy and," she made an odd noise in the back of her throat, "I'm such a sappy dope." _

_He laughed, pressing his lips to her crown, "Shall I expect tears when we tell my parents that you're pregnant?" _

_"Oh yeah," she giggled, taking in the moment of just being in his warm embrace. Oh how she loved the feel of his arms around her. "Do you think that they're going to be happy to hear the news?" _

_He nodded, "They'll be ecstatic." He smirked, "Especially Izayoi." _

_"Good." She looked up at him, wrapping her arms around his neck, "Are you happy?" _

_He smiled, kissing her ring, "Very." _

_She smiled back, forever touched by his simple words. A simple answer and she was reduced to a giggly school child. His smile always made her melt into a puddle. And then when his lips brushed against her rings, she knew that she would forever be hopelessly in love with this man. She giggled as he kissed her nose, brushing his lips once more against her lips, "Aishiteru." _

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>"Rin?" Sesshomaru's groggy voice startled her, calling out her name. She held the photos to her heart, whipping her head towards him. Her gaze ran over his form, <em>eyes still shut. He was still asleep. <em>She exhaled, taking a moment to calm herself. Her fingers were shaking as she set the photos back into the briefcase. She sat for a minute, collecting her thoughts. _He kept the photos. That was good, wasn't it?_ Rin pushed herself off the tall mattress, tiptoeing around the bed. She rummaged through her luggage for clothes, pulling on green shorts and a loose, white blouse. She sighed as she tied her hair up into a bun, closing the doors as quietly as she could.

"Good morning Mrs. Takahashi," a maid greeted Rin as she walked past, bowing her head and curtseying.

"Hello," Rin smiled, bowing her head in return, "It looks like it'll be a wonderful day, doesn't it?"

"Oh yes," the maid pointed to the sky through the large bay windows, "The sun is already out before the flowers bloom, that is already a great start to a day."

"Yes," Rin beamed, perking up, _think positively_. "It's going to be a great day." She leaned onto her toes, "Um, could you tell me where the dining hall is?"

"Of course Mrs. Takahashi," the maid gestured to the hall, "Down through there is a long hallway with the dining hall three doors down from the fitness centre."

"Wonderful," Rin beamed, bowing her head once more, "Thank you so much!"

"Of course Mrs. Takahashi," the maid bowed before she returned to her dusting.

Rin walked towards the hall, reflecting back to the photos. _Why did you keep them? _She wondered, crumpling her hand into a fist. _Why? _She looked to her ring finger, _did you actually care? Did you ever love me? As much as I loved you? _Rin walked to a large window, enjoying the feel of the sun against her skin. She closed her eyes, attempting to clear her thoughts._ Woo him_, she heard Kagome's voice run through her mind, _help him fall in love with you again_.

"How?" She murmured, her eyes opening, "You can't even stand being in my presence." She rubbed her face, _she felt so tired. The strain of the past week weighing heavily upon her shoulders. _"Maybe... maybe you deserve better anyways." She laughed bitterly, the tears welling up. _Someone strong, elegant and beautiful. _She pulled off her ring, _someone like Kagura. _

"Rin-san!"

Rin tensed as she quickly pushed back the ring onto her finger, turning to face the person who called her name. She smiled as she caught sight of the jolly man, "Murasaki-sama," she greeted him happily, curtseying in greeting.

"Rin," he shook his head, "I believe this is the eightieth time that I have requested you call me Fusao."

She blushed, "My apologies Fusao-sama."

"Nonsense," he waved his hand, "How are you feeling?"

Rin gulped, wiping her eyes, "Very well, thank you. I apologize for missing dinner yesterday. I must have caught a bug from someone at the shop."

"Are you sleeping enough?" He asked, his tone concerned.

"Yes," she played with her hands, "Perhaps more than needed."

He laughed, "There's no such thing as too much rest." He glanced at her hands, "Are things well with you and Sesshomaru?"

She averted her gaze, "Fine. Everything's fine."

"Then why is it that you looked so sad when I said his name?"

She fought to hold her tears, "I don't know."

His old, wrinkled hand wiped the tears that fell, "My dear Rin, you're going through so much. To lose a child is hard. Such pain, I know." He sighed, "I lost my first wife and daughter in the delivery room," he spoke low as he looked to the rising sun, "Medicine was not as developed as it is today."

Rin gasped, holding her hand to her heart, "She died giving birth?"

He nodded, "Yes, she did. My wife's name was Jin. She had me wrapped around her little finger, much like you and Sesshomaru." He smiled, "She was the love of my life and then, she was gone. It hurts but you try to move on. Though sometimes I ask myself what would life be like if she had survived? Would I be happier?"

Rin frowned, "Would you?"

"I think so." He patted her hand, "She was the other half of my soul."

Rin looked up, "The other half of your soul?" _That phrase sounded so familiar. _

"Hai. She was my heart." He squeezed her hand comfortingly, "Come, let's get some food, ne?"

"Sounds great," Rin replied, walking with him down to the kitchen. "How long were you married to Jin?"

"Three years. She was the younger sister of my schoolmate. She was an annoying little thing while growing up, tagging along with the boys and followed us wherever we went. Who knew she would have grown up to be the most beautiful woman I had ever the chance to meet," he chuckled, "After you of course."

She blushed, "You're such a charmer Fusao."

"I am, no? Come," he guided her to the kitchen island, "The chef has prepared an American breakfast including waffles and pancakes."

Rin grinned as she laid her eyes upon the stacks of food, "It smells delicious."

"Tastes much more delicious than it smells," the chef replied, handing her a fresh plate with fruit.

She took the plate and thanked the chef, "I'm sure it will be."

"The guests are eating outside," Fusao led her to the doors to the patio, "I believe your brother-in-law and his wife are already there."

Rin smiled, "Thank you," she pecked his cheek, "You're much too kind."

"Nonsense," he smiled, "You're much too delightful. Now go eat breakfast."

"Hai," She walked through the large white doors and onto the brick patio. She delighted in the feel of her bare feet on the warm stone, her toes curling in. She looked around the set of tables for a familiar face, feeling very much like a school-child at lunch.

"Rin-chan! Over here!"

Rin pivoted on her heel, smiling as she saw Kagome and Inuyasha sitting next to each other at a nearby table. "Good morning," she greeted, taking a seat at their table.

"Morning yourself sunshine," Kagome smiled, handing her the jug of freshly-squeezed orange juice. "This place is amazing isn't it?"

"It's like paradise." Rin lifted her fork and cut off a small piece of her waffle, "So how's pregnancy treating you guys?"

Inuyasha blanched, "She puked on me this morning."

Rin giggled as they bickered, eating her strawberries. Her eyes trailed to Kagome's swollen belly, guilt consuming her for feeling jealous.

"Well maybe if you didn't have such horrid morning breath!"

"Well excuse me for trying to give my wife some love in the morning!" He held his hands up, "I'll be sure to remember not to kiss the angry goblin in the morning."

"Augh!" Kagome prodded him with her fork, "You're such a pig! And how dare you say that to a pregnant woman! A pregnant doctor even! Do you know how easily I could jab this into your jugular and watch you writhe on the floor and die?"

He laughed, grabbing the fork away from her, "Whoa, slow down now." He grinned, wrapping his arm around her shoulders and scooted over, "I may be a pig, but I'm your pig. Right my little kitty?" He purred, kissing her cheek.

"Oh my god," she muttered, turning red, "I'm sorry Rin."

Rin shook her head, smiling widely, "It's fine."

"So," Kagome began, slapping Inuyasha's grubby hands away, shifting the conversation, "How was last night?" she asked, laying her head against Inuyasha's shoulder.

"Um," she watched as Inuyasha's left hand began to rub Kagome's belly affectionately, "It..." She chided herself once more, "It was fine."

"Yeah?" Inuyasha lifted his cup of juice and took a sip, "Because I talked to Sesshomaru last night."

"Really?" Rin's voice peaked, "Um," she cleared her throat, massaging her neck, "What did you guys talk about?"

He looked up and straight into her eyes, "You."

"Oh," Rin set her hands in her lap, "Oh."

"Yeah," Inuyasha smirked, "Basically I called him a fucking idiot and then I told him about his briefcase."

"The briefcase," Rin repeated, playing with the ends of her shorts. She smiled softly, "He kept photos in it," she murmured, thinking back to only moments ago.

"Yeah," Inuyasha sighed, "I caught him looking at them once. We were going to some stupid event for Dad's friend who had some diseased puppy or something. Anyways, we took the same limo and I got in last. He had the picture of the sonogram out and he was just looking at it, trying to figure out if it was a boy or girl. I teased him about it, telling him to leave it to the doctors. Turns out you actually couldn't tell," he shrugged. "Then I teased him some more about being whipped and keeping photos of his wife. He just laughed it off, telling me that if I had a _real_ job that required leaving my own wife for days then I would understand."

"That's so sweet," cooed Kagome, squeezing her husband's thigh, "He really does love you Rin!"

Rin furrowed her brows, "I..."

"Stop right there missy," Kagome smiled as she stood up from the table, "Think about what I said last night hm? Well I need to take a shower. I'll meet you down by the pool later?" She asked, bending down to give Rin a quick hug.

"Yeah," she rubbed Kagome's belly for good measure, "Be good for your mom little one. No making her puke on Yashie."

"Keh," He pecked Kagome's lips before she left, "I'm gonna grab some more food. Want some Rin?"

"Um," She grabbed her empty plate, "Yeah. Sounds good," she joined Inuyasha as they walked back into the kitchen. She set her empty dish in the large granite sink and walked over to the coffee machine, pouring herself a cup.

"I didn't think you drank coffee," Inuyasha noted between chewing pieces of bacon, "Thought it gave you headaches."

"I don't," she laughed, "I hate this stuff, but Sesshomaru drinks it every morning." She looked around the counter, "Can you hand me that bottle?" she asked, pointing to a blue labeled jug.

"Hazelnut? Sure," He grabbed it and handed it to her, "Honestly, I would have pegged Sesshomaru to be a black coffee kind of guy."

Rin giggled as she poured the cream, "He likes to think he does but he always complains about the taste if it's black. He secretly loves this," she took a spoon and blended the liquid until it was a deep brown. She smiled, licking the tip of the spoon, "Perfect."

"So you made his coffee everyday huh?"

She smiled, setting the spoon back in the mug, "Yeah. Um, let's go back outside I guess."

"Yeah," He handed her a plate of bacon and eggs, "And here's round 2. As your doctor, I think you need more protein."

She shook her head, "You're just trying to make yourself feel better for eating so unhealthy!"

"Exactly. Kagome would kill me if she saw me eating sausage and bacon for breakfast." He grinned mischievously as they returned to their seats, "But she's not here now is she?"

"Right," Rin snorted as she picked up her fork, "So how's my favorite nephew?"

"I'm guessing right now he's pigging out on ice-cream and cotton candy so yeah," Inuyasha laughed, "He's happy too."

Rin raised her brows, "Well that seems like a well-balanced breakfast."

He snorted, shovelling the bacon pieces into his mouth as he spoke, "To a 21 year old university student, it's the perfect breakfast."

She cocked her head, "You couldn't get Kagome's mom to babysit?"

"Nah," he waved his hand, "The kid needs to learn responsibility anyways."

"And Kagome was ok with her brother babysitting Shippo for the weekend?"

"She doesn't know." Inuyasha shrugged, "Kagome's mum is in Osaka for some old-lady trip with her friends so I just left Shippo with Souta. He's a capable kid, I mean he's babysat Shippo plenty of times before."

"Right," Rin sipped her juice, "You better hope she doesn't find out or else she'll actually stick that fork in your neck."

He laughed, "I can handle her Rin, don't worry. Hey," He nudged Rin with his foot, glancing over to the patio doors. "Guess who's here."

"Huh?" Rin turned her head, her heart stopping as she spotted Sesshomaru grabbing a plate from the chef, "Oh." She blushed, turning her head back to her own plate, "I thought he was going to be sleeping for a little while longer."

"Well I guess sleeping beauty decided to wake up. Look, he's not my biggest fan right now so I'm going to go eat at the bar," he grabbed his plate and a piece of bacon from Rin's plate, "Talk to you later lil' sis."

"Ok," Rin waved, "Have fun."

"Oh, I will." He snickered as he hopped up onto the barstool and swiveled in his chair to watch Sesshomaru walk out to the patio. He watched as his older brother scanned the tables and stiffened at the sight of Rin. "Just go sit next to her you dick," he muttered under his breath as he nibbled on his sausage, "There you go," he cooed, "Good." He snorted, "Now just make the fuck up so we can all move on."

Back at the table Rin felt her cheeks warm, her palms sweat, her feet becoming restless. "Um," she felt her heart beat rapidly as she spotted Sesshomaru walk towards her. "Good morning!" She chirped happily, playing the part of the devoted wife to a T. "Sleep well?"

Sesshomaru looked to his left, noting how the group of women had stopped their chat and turned to face him, "Very," he swooped in and pressed his lips against hers.

Rin's breath hitched, her gasp audible, "I..." Even though it was just a brief moment of contact, she felt her body tingle with delight. "I, um," she stumbled over her words, trying to piece together a coherent sentence. _He's just Sesshomaru. _She told herself, _just Sesshomaru. And that was just a kiss. _She held her hands to her lips, _a great kiss. _

He watched her through the corner of his eye, "Are you alright?" He asked as he ate his meal, beginning with the eggs.

"Hai," she bobbed her head, "Wonderful." She returned her attention to her plate of food, peaking up every once in a while. "Um..."

Sesshomaru sighed, deciding to break the ice, "Here," Sesshomaru reached into his pocket and pulled out her wedding band, "It was in the bathroom."

Rin took the ring from his hand, her own shaking as she placed it back on her finger. "Oh, thank you," she whispered, looking down at her lap. "Um, here," she pushed the green mug towards him, "I made you some coffee. I was going to bring it up to you after I finished eating but," she shrugged her shoulders, "I guess you already came down."

"Hn," Sesshomaru looked down at the brown liquid, stirring it thoughtfully.

Rin watched as he hesitated to drink it, "I didn't poison it," she muttered, looking down to the floor.

He raised a brow, his gaze on her. He took a sip, his eyes closing as he savored the taste of the rich hazelnut blended with the coffee. _It tasted good, _he thought, _it tasted familiar..._

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p><em>Sesshomaru grunted as he woke, running his hand over the black tresses strewn over his chest. "Rin," he murmured, gently shifting her petite form to the side, "I have to get up."<em>

_"No," she protested, her hold on his waist tightening. "Stay," she pleaded, her eyes tightly shut, "We can have a sleepover." _

_He chuckled, removing her hands from his waist, "As much as I'd love to stay in, I don't think the board members would appreciate it." _

_She pouted, her doe eyes opening, struggling to adjust to the sunlight streaming through their bedroom windows. "Fine," she lamented, turning to her side to face away from him, "Be lame and go to work." _

_"Lame," he repeated, shaking his head. He was thoroughly amused. He reached over to the bedside table for his watch, strapping it on as he got out of bed. He switched off the alarm clock and then walked to the other side of their massive king-sized bed. "I'll meet you for lunch," he promised, bending down to briefly press his lips upon her. He nuzzled her cheek, pressing a kiss onto her forehead, "12:30, Ninjando's. I've already had Jaken make arrangements." _

_"Okay," she murmured, bobbing her head in agreement._

_"Good," he kissed her ring finger before he left her side. He strode to the master bathroom, jumping straight into the marble shower. He stretched for a moment, reaching to grab his shoulder with his other arm. He smirked as he caught her peeking from the bed. "Enjoying the show?" He asked, his eyes meeting hers through the mirror, his baritone voice sending shivers down her spine._

_She laughed, covering her eyes with her hand playfully. "No way! Boys are so gross," she grabbed her pillow and held it over her gaze, "Close the door next time won't you?" _

_He chuckled as he grabbed his bottle of shampoo from the side, pouring some onto his palm. "You could always join me," he suggested casually, raising a brow, almost daring her to make her move._

_Rin bit her lip,"I can't," she pouted, resting her head onto the pillows. "You and I both know you'll miss your meeting if I do." _

_"Pity," Sesshomaru reached for the bar of soap next, "I was looking forward to morning shower sex." _

_"Mmngh," Rin was helpless as she watched him lather himself, his arms taut, his abdomen perfectly sculpted. "I'm swooning," she murmured, holding a hand to her heart, "Why are you so handsome?" she asked herself, sprawling out onto the large bed. _

_She looked up at the chandelier, admiring the way the sun reflected onto the seemingly purple crystals. She turned her head to the white clock on the night stand and groaned, pulling a pillow to her face. It was still five, she thought, even the sun was not yet up. She shook her head as she looked back to the bathroom, "The one thing I hate about you," she laughed, sitting up, "Is that you're a morning person." _

_She giggled as she quickly sprung up from the bed, her energy renewed. She pulled on her silk robe as she made her way out of the master bedroom. She tied it with ease as she strolled to the kitchen, pulling out a small black bag from the cupboard and poured the contents into the coffee maker. She whistled as she waited for the black liquid to come from the little machine and into the white cup she had placed underneath. She leapt on top of the marble counter, her fingers playing with the silk ties as she looked through the large bay windows. She began to daydream, watching the sun rise above the tall buildings, the gulls flying past in search for their next meal. _

_"Coffee?" Sesshomaru noted, startling Rin from her thoughts._

_Rin grinned as she turned her head, "Of course!" She pecked his cheek before she hopped down from the counter. "As your wife," She sang as she skipped to the fridge, pulling out a small jug, "It's my duty to make you coffee before you go to work. I've heard it's the perfect way to start the day," she set the jug onto the counter and leaned up onto her tiptoes to kiss his freshly shaven jaw. Her body tingled as she smelt his cologne, savoring the feel of his lips upon her forehead. "Gosh, you smell so good." _

_"The wonders of showering," he murmured, inhaling her sweet scent, "Perhaps you should try it." _

_Rin gave him a look as she pulled away, poking his shoulder playfully, "Oh! Uncalled for!" _

_"Is it?" Sesshomaru chuckled as he took hold of her finger and spun her into his arms._

_"Well hello Fred Astaire," Rin reached up and pecked his lips. "Are you always so smooth?"_

_"Always," He brought her a flower from the bouquet on the counter, "I'm as smooth as they come." _

_She shook her head, her smile wide, "I love you," she murmured as she tucked the flower behind her ear. She bent up and pulled him closer for a deeper kiss. She moaned, gripping his shoulders with her small hands. _

_He groaned as they pulled apart, "You really know how to convince a man to not go to work." _

_She giggled, "We can play later tonight," she promised."Oh! I think it's done," she pointed to the coffee maker. _

_"Hn," Sesshomaru took a step to his left and pulled out the cup, handing it to her._

_"A hint of cream," Rin sang, pouring the hazelnut into the coffee. She sifted through a drawer for a small spoon, "And mix and voila," she held up the cup, "The perfect coffee!" _

_Sesshomaru took a sip, nodding his head, "Perfect," he brushed his lips against hers, "Thank you."_

_She bit her lip, beaming, "You're welcome," she adjusted his tie and swept off the invisible dust from his shoulders, "Now go kick some corporate butt."_

_He smirked, kissing her shoulder, "I'll see you at the restaurant." _

_She nodded, waving to him as he walked out the penthouse. She sighed as she leant against the doorway, holding a hand to her heart. She glanced over to the door and laughed at the sight of a yellow sticky note. _

_'Check the kitchen drawer. - S.'_

_"What did you do this time?" She asked herself, sifting through the drawers. She smiled as she found a small blue box next to the utensils. She lifted the top and felt her heart melt at the sight of a small charm in the center of the white pillow. She traced the yellow stroller and laughed, "A diamond encrusted baby carriage," she shook her head, "You're ridiculously adorable." She bit her lip, strolling back into the bedroom. She set the box onto the nightstand and snuggled into his side of the bed. Her eyes drooped as she wrapped her arms around his pillow, enjoying the euphoric feeling of being surrounded by his scent. "I love you," she whispered, nodding off. _

_In the back of his mind Sesshomaru wondered if she had found the note he had stuck on the door. He crossed his arms, looking at the presentation, trying to concentrate on the numbers but his mind drifted to his wife. He shifted in his seat, reaching up to grab his water. He sipped the cool liquid, picturing Rin opening his gift. He knew her well enough to know that she would laugh, then probably cry. _

_"Sir?"_

_"Hn?" Sesshomaru looked lazily to his left, "What is it? _

_"Your phone sir," the gangly intern pointed to his pocket, "it's buzzing." _

_"Hn," He waved his hand to the staff, "Continue. I don't have all day."_

_"Hai," the presenter continued, "The profit margins for this quarter are projected..."_

_Sesshomaru rolled his eyes, pulling out his phone. He went to his inbox and smiled at the small photo of Rin wearing the charm on her platinum chain. 'I love it.'_

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Sesshomaru set the cup down beside him, his gaze narrowing. He looked to the girl next to him, "It's fine," he muttered, looking away. He unbuttoned the top few buttons of his shirt, suddenly feeling suffocated. <em>Why the hell did he buy the most absurd things for her?<em>

"Um," Rin wrung her hands nervously, "So..." she sighed, struggling to come up for ideas, "Do you want to go for a morning walk around the grounds? It's supposed to be spectacular."

His jaw clenched as she spoke, "A walk?" he interrupted, scoffing as his eyes turned cold, "I have things that need to be done today." He stood up from the table and walked away, leaving Rin alone.

She let out a breath, catching Inuyasha's eye. _I tried, _she thought, gazing at his spot. Her eyes trailed over the glass tabletop, the silver spoon containing hints of coffee and his empty seat. _Wait a minute, he took the coffee, _Rin perked up in the seat, _he took the coffee! _

Rin jumped up from her seat and scurried towards Inuyasha, clinging onto his forearm. "Yash!" She spoke quickly, her voice hushed as to not catch the attention of the other guests, "Did you see that?"

"He was a total ass? Yeah," He snorted, "I don't really get what you saw in him in the first place."

She rolled her eyes, "No, not that. He took the coffee! He doesn't hate it," she smiled, removing her hold from his arm, _he doesn't hate me. _

"Fuck," Inuyasha took a bite of his crepe, "Rin, honestly, at this rate he'll be yours in fifty years. Try something more than making him coffee."

She rolled her eyes, "Small steps Yash." She smiled, fingering her rings, "Small steps."

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru brooded as he walked through the halls, his hold on his mug tightening. <em>What is she doing to me? <em>He asked himself, _why is it that I can only think of you?_

"Sesshomaru."

He paused in his steps, his eyes narrowing at the sight of his father in the middle of the hall. His father wore a pair of gray slacks and a white polo, his arm wrapped securely around his wife. "Good morning son."

Sesshomaru rolled his eyes, "Father." He sighed, "Izayoi." He looked away, "Morning."

"Izayoi," Inutaisho held a hand to his wife's back, "I'll join you in the kitchen in a moment. I'd like a work with Sesshomaru, alone."

Izayoi nodded, "Of course, I'll find Rin." She pecked his cheek and walked off, glancing back behind her for a brief moment.

Inutaisho tugged at his collar, nodding his head in polite recognition to the couple who walked past. He motioned to the window, requesting Sesshomaru to step closer. After Sesshomaru stepped forward he began to speak, his voice low in an attempt to not catch anyone's attention. "Inuyasha has informed me of his qualms with this arrangement." His eyes narrowed, his tone now chiding, "You do realize that the troubles you have with your marriage reflect poorly in society?"

Sesshomaru snorted in derision, "I didn't know you employed Inuyasha to be your personal lapdog."

Inutaisho gave him a stern look, "He is your brother Sesshomaru. However much it pains you to hear, he cares for your well being as well as Rin's."

"Hn," Sesshomaru controlled his temper, "Could you carry on? I have things to do."

"Very well, it concerns the well-being of your wife. Rin." He rubbed his wedding band as he spoke, "Kagome has found bruises on Rin's body that are inconsistent with her fall, specifically on her wrist. Which leaves only one question," he looked to his eldest son, "Are you abusing her?"

Sesshomaru stiffened, "You truly think so lowly of your son?" He growled, "That I would harm her?"

"Or is it yourself who has a low opinion?" Inutaisho looked away, "Why is it that you would rather believe that you emotionally and physically manipulated a young, innocent woman to become your wife, and not that you truly fell in love?"

Sesshomaru's gaze turned cold as he looked at the coffee cup in his hands. _I made you some coffee. _He could hear her melodious voice chime through his thoughts, remembering how brightly she had smiled when he sat next to her at breakfast. "I..."

Inutaisho clasped his shoulder, "While you may be cruel in your business, I know you wouldn't have harmed Rin." He gave a soft smile, "You found yourself once Sesshomaru, perhaps you should try again."

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>xoxo<p>

tuille


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

by tuille

disclaimer: whatever you recognize, i do not own.

it took a long time to get it right, but now the chapter is extra long, so that's good, right?

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin grinned as she looked up at her brother-in-law, "Small steps Yash." She fingered her rings, "Small steps. I feel like going for a walk, care to join?"<p>

"Sure." Inuyasha waved his hand over and handed his plate to a waiter, "Kagome's probably dead asleep anyways." He grinned, wiggling his eyebrows, "You know, I tuckered her out." He held his hands up in defense, "I told her not to exert herself last night but no, she really wanted it."

"Eww," Rin covered her ears, feigning utter disgust and horror, "I don't need to know about everything that goes on in your life."

"Heh," he shrugged his shoulders, unabashed. He glanced over the grounds, "So where exactly did the asshole go?"

Rin pursed her lips, "I dunno." She glanced towards the doors, thinking the worst. "Maybe he's with another woman," she mumbled bitterly, playing with her ring.

Inuyasha raised a brow, quirking his head to the side, "Pardon?"

"Nothing. Never mind, um, so, wanna go grab some cheese cake instead? I saw some on a cooling rack in the kitchen, they looked delicious. I think they were strawberry but it could totally be blueberry," Rin babbled, walking away from him.

"No, I don't really want cheesecake at ten in the morning." He grabbed her arm gently, tugging her back towards him, "Did you say he was with another woman?"

She shook her head, "I said maybe."

"Keh, either way you slice it, you think he's cheating on you." He looked to Rin for conformation, his expression softening at the the tears building in Rin's eyes. "Look Rin, Sesshomaru may be an asshole, but he's not a cheating asshole."

"How," Rin sniffed, fighting her tears, "How do you know? I saw him!" She whispered, keeping her voice low to avoid the other guests from overhearing. Her hand closed in a fist as she continued, "I saw him Yash, with some redheaded gorgeous model! And they were both, Kami," she hung her head, "I saw him with her."

He swallowed deeply, "Valid point, but I promise you Rin, the man you married never cheated on you. Hell, he never looked at another woman." He rubbed her shoulders affectionately, "I know my brother. He loved you. He was such an idiot to never tell you himself, but I know he did." He grinned, "And I know that somewhere, deep down, he still does. He's just a bit lost right now," he explained, "Come on," he took her hand and led her out the patio and to the grounds. "Think about it, when Sesshomaru woke up from that coma he thought he was 28. The last things he remembered were that his engagement was over and that he's VP of Finance. It's got to be a hell of a shock for him to find out that all of a sudden he's 31, he's CEO of YK Takahashi and he has a wife. I'd be fucking confused and angry too."

Rin bit her lip, "I guess." She followed Inuyasha down the path towards the gardens. "I've never thought about it like that."

"Look Rin," Inuyasha sat down on the grass, patting the spot next to him for her to join. "Before he met you, he was exactly like he is now. Those stories of him being an egotistical jerk are completely accurate. He was stone cold, shunned his family, hated me, hated my mom and idolized our grandfather. The great Takahiro Takahashi." He rolled his eyes, "That dude was so much worse, believe me. Anyways," he handed her his wallet, pulling out a wedding photo, "Nine months after he met you, he's the best-man at my wedding. Because all of the sudden he's turned into this amazing guy who loves you to death. He's finally my brother. Still a jerk," he grinned, "But a hell of a lot better. All because of you." He pointed at her, "So the moral of the story is that if anyone can get him out of this funk, it's you." He patted her hand, "His wife. The charmingly adorable Rin Takahashi. The only woman on this earth that managed to melt the ice-prince's heart and turn him into a mushy-gushy teddy bear."

Rin giggled, "Thank you Yash," she spoke sincerely, "You always know what to say."

"Of course I do," he brought her in for a hug, "That's what family is for. Now," he stood up and brushed the back of his pants, "I'm going to go cuddle with my wife while you think of a plan of action. We'll discuss strategies later."

She laughed, shaking her head, "Alright, have fun cuddling."

He winked, rubbing his hands together in anticipation, "Oh, trust me, I will."

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Inside the house, Inutaisho clasped his son's shoulder. "While you may be cruel in your business, I know you wouldn't have harmed Rin." He gave a soft smile, hoping the message was getting through, "You found yourself once Sesshomaru, perhaps you should try again."<p>

Sesshomaru frowned, his grip tightening on the cup in his hand. _She was nothing to him, _he repeated the phrase like a mantra, _she was nothing. _

The elder Takahashi sighed, trying again. He gave Sesshomaru's shoulder a gentle squeeze, "Rin looked lovely this morning, didn't she?"

Sesshomaru snorted as he glanced over to his father, "I didn't know you found young girls to be attractive."

The elder man chuckled as he raised his brows. _Finally, some emotion._ "I'm astonished. You're jealous."

Sesshomaru growled, "I most certainly am not." He shook his head, struggling to verbalize his thoughts, "She's... she's..."

"Your wife." Inutaisho smirked, "You know what," he removed his hold of Sesshomaru, "I'm going to go eat breakfast with my own wife. I'll see you tonight." He walked off, leaving Sesshomaru alone to collect his thoughts.

Sesshomaru sighed as his thoughts immediatly ran to Rin. _Like they always did. _He could picture her so clearly in his mind; her beguiling smile, her long, ebony hair and her brown eyes that captivated him, that enchanted him. They were so expressive, _so beautiful._ He could almost feel the warmth of her blush-stained cheeks and hear her melodious voice, her tinkling laugh. He could envision her luscious, peach lips that seemed to call to him, that _begged_ for him to taste.

_She would taste sweet, _he thought, his head aching_, like honeysuckle_. His nose flared as he remembered the feel of her lips upon his and the smell of her soaps and perfumes. _She smelt like the flora she played with, rose notes and citrus. _

He clenched his jaw, remembering the feel of her body against his from only moments ago. _She felt so soft, so warm. _Kami, he _ached_ for her. _Ached to hold her, ached to be with her. _

"Fuck," he muttered, remembering the look on her face when he had declined her offer for a walk. _Like a heartbroken puppy, _he thought bitterly, adjusting the collar of his shirt. _It was like he was married to a child. _A child and yet he found himself struggling to keep his mind away from thoughts of her. He growled, his gaze turning cold, _her. The florist. She was just a girl. _He closed his eyes as he sighed once more. Yet he _needed_ her.

_Maru._

Sesshomaru stilled, his eyelids lifting as he looked to his left. _She wasn't there. _He laughed bitterly, rubbing his temple, _so he was hearing voices again. _

He sighed, agitation etched upon his visage. He began to pace in the hallway, thinking back to his father's words. _Find yourself, _he thought. _Find myself. _He repeated the phrase over and over, looking through the windows to the lush, green grounds. _Absurd. _He knew who he was. He was Sesshomaru Takahashi, CEO of YK Takahashi. He was 31 years of age and he was married to _her_.

"Fuck," his fists crumbled as quickly as his facade. Never in his life had he he felt so _lost_. _Three years, _he thought, his hold on the ceramic mug tightening, _he had lost three years of his life. He no longer knew who he was, let alone what he wanted. He didn't remember, hell, couldn't remember the past three years. _

"Three years," he muttered, his amber eyes passing over the frames on the hallway as he walked past._ Three years in which his grandfather passed away. Three years in which his father left his position as CEO and handed it to him. Three years in which he had met her, married her, kami, almost had a child with her. _He growled, feeling agitated,_ so who was he? _He rubbed his ring-finger, his chest tightening at the feel of his bare skin_, was he the ever-faithful and loving husband? Or did he just use her? _He looked away, feeling tense, feeling ill. _Did I love her?_

He shook his head, rubbing his face with his free hand, attempting to rid himself of his thoughts. _I am Sesshomaru Takahashi_, he repeated, _CEO of YK Takahashi. I am Sesshomaru Takahashi, CEO of YK Takahashi. I am Sesshomaru Takahashi_... "Fuck," he cursed, his fists tightening as he laid his forehead against the glass window looking out to grounds. His breaths were shallow and haggard, his mind running in a million different directions.

He _needed_ her.

_Maru._

Sesshomaru's gaze flickered to his side, expecting to see _her_. _Of course, _he thought bitterly, wiping the sheen of sweat from his brow. _She's just a girl. He didn't need her, _he resolved, his posture straightening, _she was useless. She was, _his gaze narrowed as he saw _her_ walk across the grounds with a young child in her arms, _perfect. _He was silent as he watched Rin run across the grass, dancing with the little girl as they spun in circles and laughed. His eyes ran over her slim figure, his chest tightening at the bright smile upon her face. _She looks happy, _he thought, taking a step back from the window. He watched as Rin lifted the girl up into her arms and helped her pick white blossoms from the aging tree. They eventually disappeared from his view, hidden by the patch of sakura trees. _She was wonderful with children, _he noted as he remembered brief moments of Rin playing with children. _She loved them. _

_I want to be a mother. _He could hear her voice in the back of his mind, his jaw clenching as he remembered the day when they had babysat Shippo. It was the first day they had talked about having their a family together. His eyes closed as he heard her voice whisper past, _I want my own little family._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p><em>Rin laughed as she lifted the young boy up from the couch, "Come on mister," she whispered, tucking the boy's sticky fingers in a damp blue washcloth, gently rubbing away the chocolate residue. <em>

_"Auntie Rin," the boy murmured, his eyelids half open, yawning as he spoke, "Uncle Sesshy said I could have eight handfuls of chocolate chips." _

_Rin's brows lifted in amusement, "Oh really, eight handfuls?" She tsked, pressing her lips on the boy's forehead, "No wonder you're tuckered out." _

_"Mmhmm," the boy latched his arms around her shoulders, setting his head on her collarbone, "We played cowboys and we saws a baseball game and he bought some presents." _

_"Presents? Oh," she walked to the kitchen, rinsing the washcloth under the warm stream of water. "What did he buy you this time?" she asked, her voice soft and teasing as she dabbed gently at the sides of his mouth. _

_The boy giggled, blinking wearily as he struggled to stay awake, "Mmm, a rocket ship, a silver tie and thens he bought a rock." _

_Rin cocked her head to the side, "A rock?" She moved her arm to cradle his little body, "Why that's an odd gift." _

_"Not for me," he explained, yawning once more, "For you silly."_

_"For me?" Rin giggled, her eyes brimming with laughter, "Really?" _

_"Yup, yup." The young boy shifted in her hold, "It's like a flower." He grinned widely, revealing her missing teeth, "The lady at the store said it was a big rock. It was shiny like the sun. Yup," he nodded his head, "Yup."_

_"I think," she cooed, walking up the set of stairs, "That someone," she tickled his belly, "Is becoming delirious." _

_"De-lear-i-us." The boy giggled, squirming at her touch. He smiled when she pulled her tickling hand away. "Yup," he yawned, sticking his thumb into his mouth,"I like staying here Auntie Rin." _

_Rin smiled, pushing down upon the brass door handle to the second bedroom. "Well it just so happens that we like you staying here," she replied as she bent down to tuck him into the centre of a large bed. She moved away to search through his goodnight bag. She lifted a white plush from the yellow backpack and smiled, "I think someone forgot about his puppy," she sang as she set a tattered one-eared dog next to him._

_"Yashie!" The boy latched his arms around the stuffed animal. "Thank you," he smiled, revealing two missing teeth._

_She laughed, wondering if Inuyasha knew that his son's stuffed animal was named after him. "You're welcome. And here's your goodnight kiss." She kneeled down to kiss his forehead, "Sweet dreams Shippo," she whispered, tucking the blankets around his small form. _

_"Wait, Auntie Rin?" Shippo turned to his side, embracing the stuffed puppy with one arm, "Are you and Uncle Sesshy going to have lots of babies?" He asked, his hold on the animal tightening, "Because Inuyasha says that you should. He says that you're the best. Ever." _

_She laughed, brushing bits of his fine orange hair behind his ear, "The best ever, huh?" She set her chin in her hand, "Well that's a tall order."_

_"It's true," Shippo nodded, "He said you made the ice-prince happy." He shook his little head, "So you're going to be his wife like Kagome and Inuyasha right? And have lotsa babies that I can play with? And, and you'll make Uncle Sesshy forever happy," he looked up at Rin, his eyes bright and expressive, "Right?" _

_"Well," Rin was speechless, touched by his innocent words, "I guess..." she set her hands in her lap, grinning, "Yeah." She moved to sit on her feet, "I hope so." _

_"Good," Shippo beamed, turning onto his back. "I really like you," he mumbled sleepily as he closed his eyes, "Night Auntie Rin." _

_"Night," she whispered, placing a quick kiss on his forehead before getting up from the floor. She left a sliver of the door open, allowing for light from the hall to flitter inside the room. She laughed as she rested her back against the hallway, "I make the ice-prince happy, huh?" She shook her head, walking down the hall. She smiled as she looked over the black frames lining the hall, adjusting a photo of them attending a new year's party. _

_She ran her fingers over his figure, "Forever happy," she whispered, holding her locket close to her chest, "I hope so."_

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><p><em>.forgetmenot.<em>

* * *

><p><em>Downstairs Sesshomaru awoke on the couch, rubbing the knot in his neck. He sighed in agitation, despising the tension in his back wrought by sleeping on the leather sofa. "Shippo," he muttered, "You have too much energy for a three year old boy." He lifted his head to look at his chest, expecting to see a mass of orange hair staring back at him. He frowned, seeing nothing, "Where are you?" <em>

_His gaze lifted to the top of the staircase, his lips quirking as he spotted Rin carrying Shippo to their spare bedroom. Silently he moved his legs, shifting from his sprawled out state to a sitting position. She's home, he thought as he laid his head back against the couch, thank Kami. He closed his eyes for a brief second to enjoy the soothing feel of the cool leather against his neck. _

_"Hn." Sesshomaru gave a resigned sigh, his eyes opening. He knit his brows as he felt something digging into his thigh. He reached down and pulled out a velvet box from his pocket, lifting the top to reveal the jeweled masterpiece. He smirked, fingering the yellow diamond in the centre. She'll love it, he noted, looking at the ring. "A flower bud," he murmured, closing the top. He was pleased with himself, having spent a month mulling over several ideas and designs before finally settling upon this ring. _

_Sesshomaru perked up as he heard the familiar sound of her footsteps from above moving towards the staircase. He quickly moved to his right to set the small box in the inner pocket of his jacket that laid forgotten upon the coffee table. After he sat back against the couch, resting his head against his folded arms._

_"Hi Uncle Sesshy," Rin greeted him with a mischievous smile as she spotted him on the couch. She waved her hand coquettishly, "Have a good nap?"_

_He chuckled in response, shaking his head, "Hello Auntie Rin," he retorted. His lips quirked as he noted that she walked upon her tiptoes, dancing like a ballerina on the hardwood floors. You're hooked, he thought, as he embraced her as she sat upon his lap, placing a firm kiss on her temple. She moaned happily, her toes curling as she set her head against his strong shoulders. _

_"How's the runt?" he asked, his voice low and husky as he ran his large hand down her back._

_"Sleeping," she replied, leaning in to brush her lips against his. She grinned when she pulled back, "You had chocolate!" She laughed, licking her finger before rubbing a fleck of chocolate from his chin. _

_"Cupcakes," he explained, quirking his brow playfully, "My girlfriend happens to be a wondrous baker."_

_"Wow," Rin giggled, brushing a brief kiss on his cheek, "I'd love to meet her." _

_He smirked, "Perhaps," he began, "But I'm a selfish man." He explained, his tone seductive, "And I don't like to share."_

_"Well she's all yours," she replied breathily, taking his lips once more. She moved to straddle his lap, running her fingers through his long, silver hair. Sesshomaru groaned, gripping her small waist, delighting in the feel of her body pressed up against his. He chuckled when she pulled away, wiping off hints of cherry gloss from his mouth. _

_"My bad," she whispered, stretching her torso to kiss his nose. _

_"It's fine," he murmured, drawing circles on her bare flesh. He closed his eyes, pulling her closer. _

_"How was playing babysitter?" she asked, her excitement for the day pacified as she lulled to sleep in his warm embrace. _

_"I took Shippo to a baseball game," he told her, shifting his arms to hold her closer, "He seemed to enjoy sitting in the company box." He sighed, admitting defeat, "He begged for junk food and I caved in." _

_Rin giggled, "Kagome is going to murder you. Junk food and cupcakes?" She looked over her shoulder to the staircase, "It's a wonder he's sleeping right now." _

_"Hn." He peaked one eye open to look at her and smirked, "I had Jaken take him to the park for a walk."_

_She threw her head back with laughter, swatting his head playfully, "You're making him sound like a puppy."_

_He quirked his brow, "Haven't you always wanted a puppy?" _

_She shook her head, unwrapping her arm around his shoulders."Seems like an exciting day," she murmured, stroking his cheek with the her palm. She shifted closer, "You're a great uncle," Rin told him, kissing his cheek, "He really likes you." _

_"Am I?" Sesshomaru sighed, his jaw tensing like it always did when he felt uncomfortable. "I can't help but feel," he chose his words carefully, "Guilty." He looked away, not able to look at her in her eyes, "I missed the first 3 years of his life." _

_Her expression softened, "Oh Sesshomaru," her shoulders fell, "I... your relationship with Shippo is only going to get stronger, I promise. He really does like you, ya know." She touched his tie, unknotting it with ease, "He loves coming over and spending time with you. He's so lucky to have you in his life," she smiled, bending up to kiss his chin, "Even though it took a little while for you two to meet." _

_"Hn," Sesshomaru traced her lips with his thumb, "You're optimism is astounding," he murmured, pressing his lips against hers for a brief moment. _

_Rin giggled as he began to nuzzle her cheek, "That tickles," she squirmed, laughing as he held her still. _

_"You're much too ticklish," he muttered, playfully tugging upon her hair. _

_She grinned, throwing her arms around him. She laid her forehead upon his shoulders, inhaling his scent, the smell sending tingles down her spine. "Sesshomaru," she tucked her hair behind her ear, looking bashfully towards him, "Do you ever think of having kids?" _

_He raised a brow, turning his head to look at her. He lifted her chin, "Kids?" He frowned, thinking back to a time before Rin was in his life. "Honestly," he began, speaking low, "I've always imagined having a child, but I've never thought of myself as a father." Until now, he thought as he stroked her long tresses, "Do you?"_

_She nodded, "I do. I want to be a mother." She smiled, tucking her feet into the couch cushions, "I want my own little family." She could picture it so easily. A child with his long, silver hair and his bright amber eyes. The child would be bright, would be bubbly, and would be so utterly happy. Rin giggled, running her fingers through his. Oh, their kids would be adorable. _

_"How many kids will we have then?" Sesshomaru asked, holding her small hands in his, "Three?"_

_"Oh, four! Or five?" Rin paused, her eyes widening, "Wait," she grinned, lifting her bum from his lap to look at him in his eye, "We?" _

_"Of course," Sesshomaru kissed her, his lips lingering as he wrapped his arm around her waist, "I can think of no other woman who can compare to you." He placed his hand on the small of her back, "Beautiful. Gentle. Kind. Loyal. Charming. And fairly intelligent," he laughed as Rin glared at him. "You'll be a wonderful mother to our children," he murmured sincerely, holding her hands. _

_"I..." she melted in his arms, her voice muffled by his shoulder, "Well, that means you have to marry me." _

_"Ok," He played with her fingers, running his thumb against the base of her ring finger. He smirked as his gaze shifted to his jacket. Sesshomaru lifted her chin and kissed her once more, "I'll marry you." _

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru frowned, crossing his arms as he turned away from the window. He walked through the end of the hall towards their temporary his left hand he pushed open the doors, setting the cup onto the dresser. He walked around the room and began to pace. <em>Why? <em>He circled to the bed, hesitating for a moment as he lifted the briefcase from the comforter.

_I'll marry you. _

He shivered, the lingering feelings of serenity and happiness aroused by that memory tickling the top of his spine. The hairs of his arms stood up, bumps appearing as a cool chill ran over him. _He needed to stop thinking about her. _His gaze shifted to the leather bag, his form tense as he lifted the flap. With a heavy sigh he pulled out the photos, taking his time to gaze upon the sonogram.

_I almost had a son, _he mused, taking a seat on the large bed. _Had he been thrilled when Rin announced her pregnancy? _He lifted the photo closer, running his eyes over the small white figure. _Would I have been a good father to you? _He wondered, _would she have been a good mother? _His lips curled, _yes, _he thought, thinking back to how well she interacted with children. _She was a natural; warm, patient and loving. She would have been a wonderful mother. _He closed his eyes, cursing as he felt the pain in his chest. _And an equally as wonderful wife_.

"Damn," he muttered, his chest tightening. _He had lost his son, _he thought, finally coming to terms with the accident. _They had been so excited, so eager to be a family. _He folded the photo in half, _but he had let them down. _He hung his head low, his shoulders hunched as he laid his elbows on his knees. He ran his hand over the top of his head, _he had let both of them down._

_Maru._

"Enough," he whispered, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. _This self-pity was for the pathetic, for the weak. He was Sesshomaru Takahashi. He was not weak. He did not need anyone. He certainly did not need her. _He straightened his shoulders, _it was for the best, _he told himself despite the conflict, the inner turmoil he felt. With a heavy conscience he stuffed the photo in the leather satchel. _It was for the best, _he told himself, _lying_ to himself.

"Fuck!" He gave a frustrated sound, flinging the bag against the dresser. _He was angry, _he thought bitterly, _he was so tired, so frustrated._ He sat still for what felt like forever, reflecting upon his thoughts. _He felt so empty without her. _

He brought his wedding band from his pocket and stared at it. _Why did he feel so alone? _The metal felt cool against his skin, the band glowing from the lights. "A wedding ring," he murmured, "It's just a piece of metal." He closed his fist over the band, _but did he dare? _Reluctantly his hand opened, his right hand shaking as he placed the ring onto his finger. _It fit perfectly. _He flexed his left hand, remembering the feel of her soft skin against his as she pushed the ring onto his finger the day they had married. His lips curled as he ran his finger across the platinum circle, _why was it so comforting? _

_Maru._

He licked his lips, his throat parched as he stood. He bent down to grab the leather bag, quickly leaving the confines of the bedroom. Soon he found a library, the room empty save for a lone leather chair and shelves of books. His gaze drifted over the book titles, their spines aged and tattered, gleaming with the light. Eventually he sat in the chair, running his hands over the red armrests. With a heavy sigh he opened the briefcase and pulled out the papers he had yet to read over.

Twenty minutes later, Sesshomaru began to feel utterly frustrated. "Three years," he muttered, laying the files on his lap. He had three years of company reports, budgets and contracts to read over and memorize. He glanced at his watch, snarling at the minute hand that seemed to slow down to an impossible pace. _Concentrate, _he told himself, picking up a report from the pile. _Return on capital for the twelve month period was 23.4%, reaching..._

It was not long before his mind drifted away from the reports, his brows knitting together when he found a pink sticky note attached to one of the pages. The writing was familiar, the cursive bubbly and slanted.

_'Don't forget to laugh today.' _

His shoulders fell, his hands become cold. Quickly he crumpled the note, chucking it into his briefcase. _Her. _He felt like he was suffocating, he thought, pulling at his tie. _Stop. Stop thinking about her. _He looked down at the papers in his lap, once again trying to read through the large pile. He began with the performance summary from the first quarter of 2011, noting that profits had risen 35% over the last quarter.

_Because of her. _

He cursed, throwing the pile down onto the ground. "Damn," he muttered, rubbing his face. He needed to concentrate, yet all he could do was think of _her. _He stood up from the chair, feeling restless, pacing in the library. He stalked towards the window, watching as the guests lingered amongst one another, playing frisbee with the dogs and children. His brow peaked at the sight of a vibrant garden, _perhaps a walk outside would clear my mind. _With his mind made he walked through the halls, pushing open the first set of doors he found that led to the outside. He took in a deep breath of air, enjoying the smell of the freshly cut grass and the feel of the ground beneath his bare feet. He walked towards the gardens, avoiding eye contact with all the other guests.

_He needed to be alone, _he thought as he opened the small white gate with ease. He walked down the small path, admiring the flora that surrounded him. The garden had everything, bright yellow hibiscus, white and red roses, red tulips and lavender tinted hyacinths.

_Rin would love this. _

His amber eyes caught sight of a large sakura tree, his fingers reaching out to touch the lantern that hung from the branch. _It was well-done, _he thought, turning his head to admire the lay out. In the centre of the garden stood the sakura tree, with a small stream leading to a koi pond to its right. Large rocks surrounded the area, standing erect like tall statues. The grasses were lush, the flora vibrant.

"Sesshomaru?"

He sighed, _kami, he was hearing voices again._

"Sesshomaru?"

He stilled, goosebumps raising on his arm. The voice seemed much louder, much closer. _Did he dare to turn around? _He sighed, rubbing his face, _why in the hells was he scared to talk to her? _He looked behind himself and took a step back, "Rin."

"Fancy meeting you here," she giggled, taking a step towards him. "I thought you said you were too busy to take a walk," she spoke softly, fingering the white gardenia in her hand.

"I," Sesshomaru stalled, his gaze darting from her to the ground, "I was."

"It's ok," she shrugged, "I think I had an epiphany this morning when I was eating."

She glided to the small waterfall, her voice a mere whisper with the wind. "I think I finally understand it all," she whispered, bending down to dip her fingers in the koi pond. "When you woke up, you had a wife. That has to be shocking, ne? I mean, you've never met me before. I'm a stranger to you. I get that now. And I think," she sighed, "I think that everyone expects you to suddenly remember everything, but that's not how true life works." _No matter how much I wish for it._ "So," she brushed her knees as she stood up and walked towards him, extending her right hand, "Hi, my name is Rin Takahashi. I'm 24 and I enjoy flowers, animals, traveling and baking."

Sesshomaru stared at her outstretched hand, _is she serious? _His gaze lifted to her face, his lips quirking at the absurdity of the situation, "You're foolish." He told her, taking her hand. He looked deep into her mocha gaze, seeing flecks of amusement dance about her iris.

She giggled, "You've called me that several times over the past two years." She shrugged, "What can I say, I'm a hopeless romantic."

"Hn," Sesshomaru released his hold on her hand immediatly, _romantic_, he thought, turning his head to the pond. "Do you so easily believe in fairytales and happy endings?"

"I do," Rin nodded, turning back to the water, laughing as she spoke. "But maybe that's because I spent my childhood dreaming and talking to flowers instead of studying." She tapped her chin thoughtfully before she spun gracefully upon her heel, "So what would you like to know about me?"

Her voice was music to his ears, he thought, looking towards her through the corners of his eyes. "Anything?"

Her head bobbed up and down, "Anything."

He took a moment before he voiced the nagging question in the back of his mind, "Why do you love me?"

Rin blinked, his question unexpected, "Oh." She stared at the path, watching as a colony of ants marched past, "Why do I love you." She smiled, "Well first of all, you can always make me laugh. Albeit, it's not that hard to do, but you do. When we're together, we're always laughing and I love that." She shrugged her shoulders, "And I'll miss that," she whispered, taking a step closer to him. "Secondly, you always keep me on my toes. You were always so thoughtful, so spontaneous and affectionate. Somedays I'd wake up and you wouldn't be there. There'd just be a note next to me with some clues that led to you. Other days there'd be roses on the pillows." She smiled, her hand shaking as she wiped her bangs to the side. "You always woke up first," she murmured, longing for the days where he kissed her until she woke. _How she longed for him._ "And when you would go away, you always sent me flowers." She felt a single tear drip down her cheek as she reminisced, "I mean, who sends flowers to a flower shop?" She shook her head, feeling choked up, "You're also my rock. You kept me grounded. You made sure that I didn't float away with my head in the sky," she giggled, tracing her wedding band. "And then, you're my best friend. My everything." She glanced up at him. "You know everything about me, my flaws, my weaknesses, and yet you still married me." She looked down at her hand, admiring the rings. "So that's why I love you."

_And why it'll be so hard to unlove you. _

"Hn," Sesshomaru tugged at his collar. _Her everything. _"I see."

"Is there anything else you'd like to know?" She asked, her tone cautious, not wanting to push him away.

He paused, "What's your favorite color?" He spoke low, that familiar spark of playfulness in his voice.

Rin grinned foolishly, _finally, _she thought, _his humorous spirit was getting through. _"Well, today it's green. I think it's because of the gorgeous greens in the landscape. Like the grass," she pointed to the manicured lawns, "And the leaves," she fingered the leaves on the gardenia in her hand. "Usually my favorite color depends on the day and what mood I'm in." She scuffed her foot against the path, thinking, wondering if she should continue.

"When I was pregnant," she bit her lip, "My favorite color was pink. I thought it might have been a sign that the baby was going to be a girl."

Sesshomaru frowned as he heard her voice shake, "It was a boy." He fingered the wedding band on his left hand, "Wasn't it?"

"Hai," she stepped closer, feeling brave as she decidedly slipped her hand through his. He stilled, wary eyes watching her every move. "His name was going to be Takehiko Takahashi."

"Mountain Prince," Sesshomaru murmured as he looked up at the sky, "It took us a month to find the name and yet it took only a minute for us to decide upon."

Rin gasped, "Yes, I remember." She squeezed his hand, "I wanted to name him firefly at first."

"Odd choice," he murmured as he felt her hand tremble as she spoke. He caressed her thumb with his, remembering the moments they had shared together. _He remembered laughing with her, holding her, calling her. He remembered the time she had twisted her ankle, the time she had nursed him back to health when he had gotten the flu, and the first time they danced together. _

"Can I ask you something?" She looked to her side, seeing Sesshomaru nod his head. She licked her lips nervously, "Do... do you remember everything?" _Do you remember all of me? _

He took a moment, trying to piece together the memories. _Bits and pieces. Nothing concrete. _"I don't remember everything," he spoke as he turned to face her. He lifted her chin, watching as her bright eyes swirled with emotion, "Only fragments."

She smiled, her eyes closing at his warm touch, "That's better than nothing, ne?"

"Hn." He glanced at their joined hands, "Rin," he pulled her close, his arm wrapped around her waist, "Do you..."

"Ms. Rin! Ms. Rin!" A squeaky voice yelled out as a pair of rambunctious kids ran to the couple. Rin grinned as she watched the boys run closer, stepping out of Sesshomaru's embrace to hug the boys one by one.

"Hello Koichi! Koji!" She bent down on her knees to be eye-level with them, "What are you guys up to today?"

"Well we were going to play tag if you want to join us?" Koichi jumped on his feet eagerly, "Please? Please?"

"Yes, please Ms. Rin?" Koji tugged on her hand, "You're the fastest and we wanna beat you this time."

She giggled, patting their heads, "Well ok." She stood up and turned to Sesshomaru, "I'll talk to you later?"

He nodded, watching as she walked out of the garden with the boys clutching to either side of her. His lips quirked as he tucked his hands in his pant pockets, _she certainly did have a way with children. _

"The kids love her," a woman spoke behind him, her chilled voice making him tense his shoulders.

"They do," he replied, his tone equally as cold. Sesshomaru glanced to his side, spotting the woman. She was in her mid-thirties, wearing a tight red dress that clung to her ample bosom and accentuated her small waist. Her makeup was heavy, her smoky grey eyes dark, her lips a seductive shade of red. He snorted as his gaze fell to her heel-encased feet.

_She was so unlike Rin. _

"Natsumi Mori." The woman held out her well-manicured hand, the large diamond gleaming from the sun, "My husband is on the board of directors of Murasaki and Co."

His gaze flickered with interest as he shook her hand, "Sesshomaru Takahashi."

"Oh, believe me, I know who you are," she smirked, tossing her long hair behind her shoulder. "You know," she spoke low, her voice husky, "I heard through the grapevine that Murasaki-sama is planning on giving you his company." She laughed, lifting her champagne glass to her lips, "Whatever did you do to get that geezer to play nice?"

"My wife." His gaze shifted back to the trio who were chasing one another on the lawn, "She somehow managed to charm her way into his good graces."

"Hm," Natsumi played with her ruby necklace, "How... interesting." She looked towards him, "There's been several woman over the past few decades that have tried to worm their way into that man's heart. I find it hard to believe that your little _wife_ managed to do so, and so successfully." She chuckled cynically, fingering the glass flute, "I wonder what she had to do."

Sesshomaru snarled, grabbing her wrist to pull her close. He looked deep into her cold eyes, "I assure you Natsumi," he hissed, "My wife is most unlike _those_ women. Especially you," he looked her up and down, his eyes filled with disgust, "How many men have you slept with to get to where you are now?"

"Augh," she whipped her hand from his strong hold, "I would apologize but I'm just being honest." She fixed her dress, smoothing out the wrinkles with her palm. "Your wife is far too _sweet_ to handle this lifestyle. I heard that she's feeling ill, isn't she? Didn't that poor little girl faint?" Her tone faked sympathy, "It's sad, really. Your wife can't _handle_ the spotlight. She can play the role of the vapid pixie for all she can, but I know better," she smiled, lifting her hands to fix his silk tie, "And I _know_ you know better." She stroked the fabric, running her manicured finger down his chest, "You need someone that can handle your lifestyle, whether in business," she looked back at him, lowering her voice, "In society," she stepped closer until her breasts touched his chest, "Or in the bedroom."

He smirked, his eyes narrowing at the feel of her ringed finger running down his cheek, "Someone like you?"

"Exactly," she ran her hands over his broad shoulders, "I'm sure you're bored of her elfin ways by now, no?" She grabbed his left hand, her manicured fingers wrapping around his wedding band, "You need a real woman to be your wife."

Sesshomaru began to chuckle, "A real woman? I wouldn't touch you even if you were the last woman on earth. Rin," he began, his tone venomous as he stepped back, "Is my wife. And so shall she remain until death do us part. Or did you forget that part from your wedding vows? Which I would then deem you the vapid idiot considering Shigeo Mori is your fourth husband within the last decade."

Natsumi glared at Sesshomaru, "You're making a mistake."

"No, I believe you are." He turned away in disgust, beginning to walk up the hill to the confines of the house. "When I assume ownership of Murasaki and Co., consider your husband fired."

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin glanced back to Sesshomaru as she ran with the boys, her form faltering as she spotted the tall, leggy woman beside him. Her breath hitched as her mind immediatly ran to the image of a red-headed woman wrapped around Sesshomaru. "Koji," she tapped the young boy's shoulder, her voice shaking in fear, "That's your mother, isn't it?"<p>

"Huh?" Koji looked back to the garden and shrugged his shoulders, "Nah. She's just my dad's wife. My real mom is so much more awesome! My real mom actually does stuff with us." He rolled his eyes, "That lady just shops and gets surgery."

"Oh." Rin felt the hold on her heart tighten when she watched them embraced. _Was she his mistress? _

"My real mom is so much better." He smiled brightly, "She's kinda like you Ms. Rin."

Rin felt her breaths become uneven, "Like me, huh?"

"Yeah. She's really funny and she's really pretty and she likes dogs. Mom's the best." He growled as he spotted his brother, "Hey, Koichi! You're cheating ya twerp!" He ran after him, chasing him around the lawn.

Rin glanced back to the gardens, _if their real mom was so amazing, why did their father leave her? _Her heart clenched when the woman began to stroke Sesshomaru's chest, _because of women like her. _"Of course," she muttered, looking away. _She could never be like her. _

"Ms. Rin!" The youngest boy tugged on her shorts, "Koji and I are going to go find our dad. He promised to play tennis with us!"

"Oh, alright," Rin bent down to hug them goodbye, "Be good for me, promise?" She held out her pinky finger, smiling when they both linked their fingers with hers.

"Promise! Bye Ms. Rin! See you later!" The boys jumped up and ran back to the large house, leaving Rin alone on the grounds. She looked to the gardens and felt her heart sink, _he was no longer there. _She looked to the house and felt her chest tighten, _was she with him? _She closed her eyes tight, _she thought she had finally made progress with him. _She sighed, her shoulders down, _but maybe she never would. Maybe she would never see _her_ Sesshomaru again. _

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Later that day, Rin began to get ready for the charity event that was to take place in the ballroom. She smiled wistfully as she lifted a garment bag from her suitcase, carefully unfolding the nylon before placing it on the bed. She pulled down the zipper, revealing the dress inside. The gown was beautiful, floor-length and cream colored. The top was lace and sleeveless, with pleats along the bust and waist.<p>

"You're so pretty," she murmured, carefully lifting it from the bag and hanging it in the closet. She took a step back and admired the gown, remembering the day she had purchased it. It had been on a trip to Paris with Sesshomaru. They had found a vintage clothing store and spent hours playing dress up before she had found the dress. He had insisted that he buy it but she refused to let him, considering he had paid for the entire trip. Rin bit her lip, her vision clouding, the familiar hold on her heart aching as she remembered. _Their first trip as a couple. _She sniffed, fighting off the urge to cry, to mourn the loss of their relationship.

She hurried towards the bathroom and washed her face, curling her hands on the marble sink when she was finished. _Plain, boring Rin, _she thought, stroking her cheeks. _I look like a little girl. _

She turned away from the mirror and began to strip off her shirt and shorts. She folded the clothes into a neat pile before she returned to the bedroom and set it in her suitcase. She then walked to the closet and unzipped the dress before she removed it from the hanger. She hesitated to put it on. "You're much too pretty for someone like me," she murmured, running her fingers over the silk. She licked her lips, letting out a deep breath before stepping into the dress, placing her arms through the top. When the dress was on she looked down and let out a deep breath, using her hands to adjust the dress slightly to the left.

"You look exquisite." His voice came from behind her, startling her as his hand lifted the zipper up to the top.

She gasped, her body trembling, "Sesshomaru." She waited until the dress was fully zipped before she turned to face him, "You..."

"Are stunning," he whispered, cupping her chin. "Do you know how beautiful you are?" He asked, his voice raw with emotion.

"I," she whimpered when he pulled her close, "What are you," she frowned, smelling the liquor on his breath, "You've been drinking..."

"Stop, stop talking," he murmured, cradling her head in his hands, "Just kiss me back," he requested, leaning down to brush his lips against hers. It felt like a mere second as their lips touched, his caressing hers, his hold on her waist tightening as she moaned and mewled.

"Maru," she murmured when they parted, "Again," she pulled his head down, savoring the taste, the feel of his lips. She pushed away her thoughts, her rationality and concentrated on the moment, on him. _Because in this moment, he's only mine. Because in this moment, he's still my Maru. _

Rin cried when he pulled away, tears spilling down as she grasped his shoulders. She looked at the floor, wondering how her feet had somehow found their way on top of his. "Did you kiss the other women too?" She asked, her voice a mere whisper.

Sesshomaru frowned, stroking her hair, "What?"

"Nothing." She swallowed her fear, her frustration. "Nothing. I should get ready," she walked towards the bathroom doors before Sesshomaru pulled her back. She struggled to get out of his hold but he was far too strong. _Or maybe she wasn't trying to get away. _

"Look at me," he hissed, grabbing both of her wrists. "Rin, look at me."

"Fine," she looked up at him, her eyes watering. "You know what? I hate this," she whispered, "I hate this so much." Her voice broke as she continued, struggling to contain her tears, "All I wanted was to be happy. To be so stupidly and foolishly in love with a man that loved me as equally as stupidly and foolishly. All I ever wanted was to be happy," she laid her head against his chest, "And for the last few years I finally was. I was so goddamn happy," her hands fisted tight, "With you. And now it's like you're gone and I'm all alone again. It's like I'm back in that orphanage and I know that no one wants me, that no one cares about what happens to me. I thought that I could fight for you, that I could somehow, miraculously convince you that you loved me, but I don't think you ever did. You just played with me," Her brown eyes slowly became cold, "You never loved me like I loved you."

"Rin," he cupped her face, "I never..."

"I'm so tired Sesshomaru," she sniffed, feeling her nose drip. She closed her eyes and imagined, "Just lie to me. Tell me that everything's going to be ok. Tell me that I'm going to wake up tomorrow and this is all going to be just a dream. And when I wake up, there will be a rose on my pillow, and you'll be in the kitchen trying to make french toast. But you probably burnt it so you're trying to get Jaken to pick you up some from that little cafe we love. And then, when you see me, even though my hair is a mess and I probably have morning breath you smile and kiss me and twirl me around the kitchen. And in that very moment, I'll know that I'll forever be happy with you."

Sesshomaru laid his forehead against hers, "I... Rin. I'm sorry." He wrapped his arms around her as she sobbed, "I'm a fool," he told her, "I hurt you." He kissed the top her head, "I promise to never hurt you again. I promise you that I will always care for you. I promise you that." His chest tightened when he felt her tears through his shirt.

_Aishiteru._

Rin looked listlessly at his chest, _are you still lying to me? _"Sesshomaru, promise me that you'll be happy," she requested, wiping her nose. _Even if it's not with me. _

"Rin," His arms slackened around her, "I..."

"It's ok." She rubbed her eyes, "Forget it," she pulled away from his embrace, "Forget I said anything. I need to finish getting ready," she sniffed, "And so do you." She walked to the bathroom, closing the doors once she entered. She let out a deep breath, laying her back against the door. It was minutes before she stood in front of the mirror and opened her makeup bag. She took her time with the mascara, adding a hint of blush before applying a light coat of lipstick. _All done, _she thought, looking at herself in the mirror. _He said I was beautiful, _she laughed softly, _but maybe it was the alcohol talking. _Her hands shook as she opened the bathroom door, her gaze set firmly on the floor as she walked into the bedroom. She searched the room for her heels and found them in her suitcase, grabbing them before she sat on the bed and put them on, fully aware of a pair of eyes watching her every move.

"Are you ready?" He asked, his smooth baritone voice causing shivers to run down her spine.

"Hai," she dared to peak up, her heart stopping as she saw him. He looked devastatingly handsome in his black slim-fit suit. His tie was thin and long, his feet enclosed in fine leather. Her heart clenched,_ she was so stupid, so naive to think that he could ever be hers. _

She stumbled to her feet, pacing her breaths as she walked towards him. She took his outstretched hand, curling her own hand against his. "You're wearing your ring," Rin murmured in disbelief, feeling the cool metal against her fingers.

"I thought it was for the best," he replied, his gaze locked on hers.

"I," she was speechless, _he's wearing his ring. _"But you said..." _it was unnecessary. _

"I know." He stroked her cheek, "I was wrong," _about so many thin_gs.

Rin smiled, tilting her head to the side. She lifted herself onto her toes and gently kissed his lips. _Maybe, _she thought, holding his hand as they walked to the ballroom, _maybe we have a chance after all._

* * *

><p><em>.forgetmenot.<em>

* * *

><p><em>xoxo<em>

_tuille_


	14. Chapter 14

chapter 14

by

tuille

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><p>disclaimer: i own nothing except my imagination and heart<p>

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><p>Rin peaked up at Sesshomaru as they walked to the ballroom, fully aware of the large grin plastered on her face. <em>He looks so handsome in that suit, <em>she thought, her grip on his hand tightening.

"You're quiet tonight," he noted, his eyes set on the path ahead of them.

"Am I?" She replied, her voice hushed as she laid her head against his arm, "I guess I'm just thinking."

He glanced to his side, "What are you thinking of?"

She looked down at her heel-encased feet, blushing, "You," she whispered, goosebumps appearing on her forearm as she felt his long fingers caress her wrist.

Sesshomaru stopped walking as she spoke, gently tugging her hand so she faced him. He lifted her chin, looking deeply into her eyes, "You truly are beautiful." He chuckled as she ducked from his gaze, "And I'm not saying that because you think I'm intoxicated." He brushed his lips against her forehead, wrapping his arms around her waist. He began to sway to an invisible, inaudible tune, laying his forehead against hers.

Rin laughed as tears filled her eyes, "You're making me cry," she sniffed, thanking him as he wiped the lone tear that dripped down her porcelain skin. _It's like you're back, _she thought, lifting her arms to wrap around his broad shoulders, _but for how long? _She fought to hold back the urge to cry, _but w__hat if this is just another dream? _Her heart clenched at the thought, _what if I wake up and you're gone. _Could her heart handle anymore pain?

Sesshomaru cupped her cheek, watching as Rin curled into his touch, her own hand covering his. He saw the rush of emotions running through Rin's stormy brown eyes, "Am I?" She closed her eyes, her soft breaths blowing puffs against his palm. His chest felt heavy, _how many times had he made her cry since the accident? _"I... apologize."

Rin gave him a soft smile, her brown eyes watering as they opened. "You're forgiven," she murmured as she held his hand up and kissed his palm, "You know I can't stay mad at you."

"Hn," he brushed his hand down the length of her back. He held her close, his arm wrapped around her waist. He watched her, the weight on his chest easing. He chuckled to himself, _forgiven. So easily? Yet that was Rin. _His gaze softened, _his Rin. She still loved him so implicitly._ It was truly staggering to think that holding this one girl in his arms could make him feel so complete. With her at his side he felt so calm, so at peace. _So perfect. _He pressed a firm kiss on her forehead,_ he had to believe that he truly cherished her. _

Moments later, Sesshomaru reluctantly broke the silence, "The event tonight is for an orphanage," he began, "Yet I don't remember the details."

"Oh," she blinked, her mind torn from reverie, "The event tonight is for the Kokoro House." Her gaze rose to meet his, "The building has been around for over 60 years so there's lots of issues with the structure. And then there's just not enough room to handle the amount of orphans entering the system. You had, well," she sniffed, "YK Takahashi had just finished building a new orphanage, so the event tonight is to raise the money for furnishings and to keep it afloat for a good while. Hopefully," she squeezed his hand, "Hopefully they raise enough money tonight."

"The Kokoro House," he murmured, a brief memory flashing through, "That's where you were placed."

"Hai." Rin blinked back the tears, the pain in her chest as she closed her eyes and remembered those heartbreaking memories.

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p><em>A slight eight year-old girl struggled from a young woman's embrace, running towards a large wooden door, tears dripping down her face. "No!" Her small hands smashed against the door, trying eagerly to leave the dark, cold building, "Let me go home! I want to see my mommy! No!" She pushed away the woman's hands, "Go away! Let me go home!" She was so tired, her small form exhausted from the constant crying and lack of sleep. She wanted to be back in her cozy little house, away from this bleak, scary building. She wished to be surrounded by her teddy bears and dolls, eating cookies for breakfast and reading bedtime stories with her brother. And most of all, she wanted to be back in her parents' warm embrace. She craved her mother's soft words and her father's good night kisses. "No," she whimpered, tugging on the brass handle of the unmovable door. She just wanted to be home.<em>

_The woman was frazzled as she ran her hand through her bangs, "Rin, sweetie, you know that you can't see your parents." She let out a deep breath, knowing that this was the hardest part of her job. How could you help a young child understand death?_

_The little girl glanced up at the woman, her lips quivering, "Why?" Her hands fell to her side, "Was, was Rin bad?" _

_The woman felt her heart break in two as she looked into those big, brown eyes, "No sweetie, you were so good. You were a wonderful little girl." She knelt down to face the little girl, brushing her hair, "But remember? We had that talk last night? Your mom, your dad and your brother are all angels now." _

_Rin's eyes filled with tears, "Can Rin be an angel too?" She asked, her voice was soft and pleading._

_The woman swallowed her tears and shook her head. "I'm sorry Rin." _

_"No," Rin began to sob, "Rin just wants to go home," she whimpered, falling to the floor. She wrapped her arms around her little knees, wiping the snot from her nose. "Rin just wants to go home." _

_"It' s going to be ok Rin," the woman cooed, caressing her ebony tresses, "I promise." She glanced at her watch then back to the small child, "Come on little one, it's time for you to go to bed." The woman's hands shook as she lifted Rin from the ground, holding her close as they walked up the large staircase. _

_Rin was silent, tears still flowing down her cheek as she played with the woman's gold necklace."Will Rin see her mommy again?" _

_The woman nodded, "Of course. One day you will all be together again. But not now, now they have to be angels, and you," she opened another door, "You are going to be a good girl and go to school, get good grades and become someone great. And one day," she set Rin on the small bed, handing her a small, tattered bear, "You'll have your own family." _

_Rin looked listlessly at the bear, "My daddy gave me this." _

_"I know sweetie," she lifted the covers of the bed and tucked the little girl in. "Promise me that you'll be a good girl?" _

_Rin nodded, hugging the bear close. She closed her eyes and tears welled up as she could still smell her home on the bear. "Are you leaving Rin too?" _

_The woman blinked back the moisture in her eyes, "I have to go help other little boys and girls now." _

_Rin looked at the other beds in the room, each filled with a small child. "All their mommy's are angels?" _

_The woman turned to see what Rin was pointing to. "Yes," she nodded her head. "Sweet dreams little Rin," she whispered, kissing her forehead. _

_Rin felt cold as the woman left, her tiny body shivering under the thin blanket. She was alone, she would never see her mom, her dad or Taro ever again. She felt scared, left alone in this scary building with all the other children. Rin began to cry, hugging the bear close; she just wanted to go home. _

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><p><em>Rin held onto her bear as she walked out of the orphanage, her toes curling as she stepped on the dewey morning grass. <em>

_"Hey look, it's the mute girl!" A group of boys gathered around her, one leaning forward to rip the bear from her grasp._

_She gasped, holding her hands out. _

_"Why don't you say something? What? Are you too scared? If you ask for it back we'll give it to you!" The leader of the group taunted her, "Or are you too stupid to talk?" _

_Rin whimpered, wrapping her arms around herself. She opened her mouth, willing herself to speak but she couldn't. Nothing came out. Tears spilt out as she watched the boys laugh and run away with her bear, the only thing she had left of her family. _

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><p><em>"Come along children!" The woman in charge of the orphanage stepped outside, clapping her hands together, "The families are coming in five minutes so get ready!" <em>

_Rin wandered aimlessly around the yard, watching as a stream of adults walked into the yard from the brick building. Some nervously approached the children, while others seemed to instantly found a connection that they they were looking for. _

_Rin glanced down at the floor, her heart aching. New parents? It had been three years since she lost her parents and she was finally coming to terms with it. She would never see her family again, no matter how much she cried and wished for them to come take her away. _

_New parents. The thought made her uneasy. She sighed, rubbing the bruise on her wrist. The pain was gone, all that remained was an ugly, purple mark. Suddenly, seemingly out of nowhere, her tiny body walked into a pair of long legs. _

_"Oh!" The man turned around, startled. He glanced down and gave her a jolly smile, "Why hello there."_

_Rin glanced up in fear, flinching as he spoke. She didn't mean to walk into him, "I..." she stuttered, her extremities trembling. She was terribly afraid of what he would do to her. _

_The man raised his brow, bending down on one knee to hold out his hand, "Ito Aritomo. And you are?" _

_She said nothing, slowly backing away before she ran from the man. She didn't want new parents. She just wanted to go home. _

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>"You're crying," Sesshomaru murmured, lifting his thumb to wipe her eye. She had been silent for the past few minutes, her eyes glassy and dull.<p>

"Hai," Rin closed her eyes, "It was an... unpleasant time." _No one wanted me_. She lifted her hands to play with his black tie, her nimble fingers straightening the fabric and smoothing out the wrinkles. _Sometimes I find myself wondering why you did. _She sniffed, forcing a smile on her face, "You know, before we were married, I would make Jak come into work with a tie so I could practice tying it." She laughed fondly, "Whenever it wasn't busy, we would do drills until I could get your signature knot down pat." She closed her eyes, remembering those moments, "It took awhile, but I finally got the hang of it." She laid her hands on his chest, glancing down, _but that's over now_. She looked at the black silk, memorizing the way it looked against his suit. _No more waking up at six in the morning. No more good morning kisses. No more goodbye hugs. _

She struggled to blink back tears as she looked up at him, _would she ever get the chance to knot his tie for him?_ She sighed, berating herself for thinking so pessimistically. _She had to believe that she would. That someday, she would wake up next to him and everything would be back to the way it was._ Rin leant up onto her toes to place a soft kiss on his lips, "We should probably go in."

"Hn," Sesshomaru brushed her hair to the side, studying her expression, "Indeed." He took her hand and together they walked into the ballroom.

"Ah! The couple of the hour! Rin!" Murasaki greeted the pair as they walked through the doors, his hands waving animatedly as he spoke. "You look beautiful as always," he kissed her cheeks, his tone jovial, "And of course, Sesshomaru. Sharp dresser you are," he shook the man's hand. "Come, come, I'd like to introduce you to some of my colleagues," he glanced at the young woman, "That is if it is ok with your wife? I don't wish to get you into trouble."

Rin smiled playfully, "It's fine Murasaki-sama. Just have him home by midnight."

"But of course." He winked, "We wouldn't want him to turn into a pumpkin now would we?"

Rin giggled, "Oh, the horror." She blushed as Sesshomaru pressed a firm kiss on her lips, waving her hand as they melted into the large crowd of people. Rin sighed as she scanned the crowd, looking for a familiar face. Instead, she saw women draped in furs and jewels and men dressed in tuxedos. She took a step back, suddenly feeling out of place.

"Champagne miss?"

Rin gasped, startled by the voice, "Oh!" She looked up at the waiter and smiled, "Thank you." Her hand shook as it held the glass, taking a sip of the cool liquid to soothe her nerves.

"Of course miss," the waiter bowed low and left Rin once again alone. Every so often she could see a couple of people turn her way, looking at her with skepticism and wonder. Some looked at her with pity, while others stared daggers. Rin shuddered, rubbing her arms, suddenly feeling cold. She pursed her lips, watching as Sesshomaru spoke to a group of gentlemen. She smiled as their eyes met, wishing that the night would end._ Wishing that she could just be in his arms forever. _

"Why there you are dear," Izayoi called out to Rin as she entered the ballroom with her husband at her side.

Rin spun around and nearly ran towards the older woman, "Izayoi," she whispered, embracing her in a warm hug.

"How are you feeling?" Izayoi asked, lifting Rin's chin to inspect her visage.

"Better. So much better." Rin released her hold of Izayoi and glanced up at her husband. "Inutaisho-sama," she curtseyed low to greet the older man, tension wrought in the air.

"Rin." He nodded in greeting, "I..." Inutaisho sighed, tugging on his tie, "I'm sorry, please excuse me." He left the pair, unable to face his eldest son's wife. He looked over his shoulder, frowning at the look of disappointment on his own wife's face. He knew he was a coward, running away from his guilt, for he played a great role in causing that sweet girl so much pain.

Rin watched as Inutaisho left to mingle with the other guests, "Is he mad at me?" she asked, her tone soft.

"Nonsense," Izayoi held her shoulder comfortingly, "He's been out of sorts recently. I think he feels rather uneasy about this... agreement."

"Oh." Rin felt her chest tighten, _the agreement. _She had nearly forgotten about it. _One more year, _she thought, catching a glance at her husband. She suddenly felt sick, her insides twisting, _their marriage had an expiration date._

"Come on darling," Izayoi led Rin gently by the arm, "Let's be social, shall we?"

"Ok," Rin muttered, her eyes listless as they walked up to a group of four middle-aged women.

"Rin, I'd like you to meet Momoko Oonishi, Shiori Watanabe, Ami Sato and Natsumi Mori."

Rin flinched as her gaze set on the last woman, _her_. She struggled to stop herself from crying, from breaking down as she curtsied, her heart beating rapidly. _This is the woman that Sesshomaru was talking to. _She swallowed, her gaze running down the woman's body. _She is stunning, _thought Rin, taking in the woman's elegant bun, her smoky eyes and slinky gold dress. The woman oozed sex and elegance, her fingernails red, her lashes long. "I-it's a pleasure to meet you all," she spoke finally, her voice shaky.

Natsumi gave her a cool smile, "The pleasure is all mine." She tossed back her long, brown hair, "Your husband is an absolute... delight," she purred, looking straight into Rin's eyes. She smirked, watching as Rin froze in fear. She lifted her head, feeling victorious, "Tell me Izayoi, have you placed any bids for the auction?"

"Oh, I have not been to the tables yet." Izayoi patted Rin's back, troubled by her lack of speech. Rin was normally so great at mingling, having the ability to have light-hearted conversations with even the most unpleasant of people. "Is there anything good?"

"Well there is a trip to Paris." She nodded towards her husband, "I have yet to convince Syou to place a bid but I'm sure you could convince Inutaisho to. With the right incentive, I'm sure he would be more than happy to take you to France."

Izayoi laughed, "Oh, I should hope so." She turned to another woman and beamed, "How are your children Momoko? Motomichi and Toshiki?"

Momoko smiled, her chubby cheeks stained red with blush. She wore a modest blue dress and long sapphire earrings, "As crazy as always. My eldest broke his arm last week, falling _up_ the stairs." She laughed, holding a hand to her heart, "But they're so sweet. They brought me flowers before Jun and I left for this trip."

"Yes, children, they are so terribly sweet," Natsumi's words dripped with acid, turning the conversation back to the small girl. "So tell me Rin," she leaned forward, feigning concern, "How are you feeling?"

"I..." Rin's brows furrowed, "About?"

"The accident." Natsumi placed her hand on Rin's forearm, squeezing it, "It must have been so horrible. I can only imagine the heartache."

"I..." Rin's gaze was set on the woman's hand, "I..."

"And then for you to lose your child? How absolutely horrid. How unjust and unfair. Cruel even." Her tone seemed sympathetic but Rin could pick up the woman's underlying hostility.

"Oh yes," Shiroi pulled a sad expression, "I heard about the accident in the paper. The driver was drunk! Can you believe it? I think it's only just that he didn't survive."

"Yes, but you're still so young," Natsumi's remark felt scathing and condescending "I'm sure there will be more children along the way, ne?" She removed her hand from Rin's arm, "Correct me if I'm wrong, but you were 22 when you met Sesshomaru?"

Rin nodded dully, wondering why one woman's words could hurt her so.

"Yes, the 22 year old florist and the heir to a realty empire. An odd pairing, if I do say so myself. Quite atypical for him. A woman, if that, rather _uneducated_, rather _suburban_. A far cry from his previous fiancé, what was she, a model? A law-school student as well, wasn't she?" She smirked, "And you were just a girl really, if you think about it."

Izayoi frowned, "Natsumi," she began, warning the woman to stop her petty attack.

"But of course," She lifted Rin's hand, admiring the large ring, "Who am I to say anything? It is you who managed to land one of Tokyo's most infamous bachelors and not I." She laughed, looking around the group, "It seems that all men enjoy their women _young_, ne?"

Rin stiffened, "I wouldn't know, this is only my first marriage after all," she quipped, infuriated by this woman.

Natsumi's eyes narrowed,_ well, well, _she thought. _It seems that the little girl does have a backbone after-all. _"Yes, well, I better find my husband and inquire about some diamonds. I do wish you well," she leaned forward to whisper in the girl's ear, "And let's hope for your sake, your pathetic little relationship with your _husband_ ends soon. Let the real women have a chance, ne?" She smiled as she pulled back, "Izayoi darling, we must catch up soon. I'll have my assistant ring you up to schedule lunch." She kissed the woman's cheeks and left the group, leaving Rin with her hands scrunched up into fists.

Izayoi sighed, looking at her daughter-in-law. "I never did like that woman," she muttered low, rubbing Rin's back.

Rin was silent, her gaze following the woman who slinked towards her husband, wrapping her thin arms around his waist and whispered into his ear. She looked away, "I need some fresh air," she whispered, curtseying once again, "Please, excuse me."

"Of course," Izayoi murmured, watching Rin exit the ballroom through the large doors. She frowned, _what did she say to you Rin? _

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Sesshomaru laughed with the five men, lifting his glass in salute to good fortune and health.<p>

"I've always like you," spoke one man, dressed in a white suit, his beard long and grey. "Smart lad, I've always said. Just like your father, though not as cocky." He slapped Sesshomaru's shoulders, "You'll be a great leader for these two companies and without a doubt, we will take over all of Asia."

"Perhaps even the world," Murasaki chimed in, smiling broadly, "Now, we will all speak again on the twentieth, the e-mail has been sent to your secretaries. And with that," he clapped his hands, gesturing for the waiter to refill their glasses, "Enough business talk. This is a party and we all have our women to entertain, ne?" He wiggled his brows suggestively, "And you," he pointed to his friend, another gentleman dressed in a grey tux, "I expect you to spend extravagant amounts of money on those prizes over there, Kami only knows that I pay you well enough." He pointed to a long glass table and laughed, "I do think your wife has been eyeing the sapphire earrings for nearly an hour."

The man groaned, "Aye, not again. That woman is going to put us in the poor house," he grumbled, stalking over to his wife.

Sesshomaru watched the man and his wife interact, bickering like school children. He chuckled, highly amused as the man caved in and left a bid for the earrings.

"So what do you think?" Asked Murasaki, gesturing to the room, "The board members seemed very confident in your abilities. I think it's safe to say that the merger will happen within the next year, or dare I say, even sooner."

"Did you really have any qualms?" Sesshomaru retorted dryly, lifting his glass to his lips.

Murasaki smirked, folding his arms, "Of course not. I am Fusao Murasaki, President of Murasaki Co. If anything, I am confident that this deal will lead to the undoings of all of our rivals in the Asian market."

"I thought business talk was over," Sesshomaru replied, raising his brow, "You do have a date to entertain, no?"

"Ah, I do. She's lovely, isn't she?" Murasaki smiled fondly at his date who was chatting nearby to a group of women, "And a doctor. Kami, I think I've finally found someone to be with for the rest of my life. And you!" He clapped Sesshomaru's arm, "Why don't you buy your wife something pretty? I hear that there's a nice necklace, diamonds and pearls."

"I think I will," Sesshomaru nodded, "Have a goodnight Fusao, try not to... strain yourself."

Murasaki laughed, "I may be old but I am not incapacitated. Find your wife Sesshomaru and enjoy her before I find it in myself to steal her away from you."

Sesshomaru smirked as he said his goodbyes, walking over to the table of auction items. He scanned the prizes, the items ranging from luxurious cars to vacations to jewelry. He raised his brows at the large bids listed underneath; it seemed that the orphanage would be financially stable for a long time.

"Can I help you find something sir?" The teenage attendant walked towards him, smiling politely. He was gangly and tall, his face spotted with pimples. "Perhaps you would be interest in the trip to New York? 4 days in a five-star hotel, all inclusive. The highest bid as of now is 750 thousand yen."

"No."

"Well then, we have a large selection of jewelry," the boy pointed to his left, picking up the various boxes, "This sapphire encrusted cuff or perhaps this pearl necklace?"

Sesshomaru ignored the attendant, soon finding what he was looking for. He leant over the glass to sign his name on the sheet, "Make sure no one else bids on this."

The attendant looked down at the bid and blinked, "Wh-whaat? Ah, sir?" His voice cracked, his mind boggled, "Th... that's 75 million yen."

Sesshomaru's gaze lifted to the attendants, rolling his eyes at the boy's audacity. His voice was dry as he spoke, "Indeed." He then left the table, searching the room for any sight of his wife. He sighed, tugging on his tie,_ she was no where to be found. _He tucked his hands in his pockets and walked out onto the balcony. He looked over to the lake, watching as the sun set into the deep blue waters. _Where are you Rin?_

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Rin sniffed as she walked into the bathroom, wiping her eyes as she stepped up to the large mirror above the row of sinks. <em>She looked like a raccoon<em>, she thought miserably, her hand clenching around the marble countertop.

_Let the real women have a chance. _

She laughed bitterly, brushing back her long hair with her fingers. "You'll have your chance in a year," she whispered, glancing down at the porcelain sink. She trailed her fingers over the stainless steel features, leaning against the countertop. _Did everyone think so ill of her? Did they all think that their marriage was a sham? _

She pushed herself away from the countertop and bent down to take off her heels. She picked the shoes up and walked towards the small set of chairs that were hidden behind a tall, marble wall. She sunk into a plush white leather chair, curling her knees to her chest as she looked to the floor. Her fingers played with her wedding band, replaying the tense interaction with Natsumi Mori.

_Let's hope your pathetic relationship with your husband ends soon._

"Pathetic relationship," she whispered, ripping off the ring, "Kami, why am I so stupid?" She hung her head, chastising herself, "So stupid." She cursed, clenching her hair, "I had to fall in love with _him, _didn't I?" _Sesshomaru Takahashi, the most-wanted bachelor of the century._ She pushed back onto the seat, her head resting on the back of the chair. _Why couldn't I have fallen in love with someone else?_ "Why did I have to fall in love with you?" She asked herself, picturing him so clearly in her mind. She envisioned his piercing amber eyes and his long, lean body. She sighed, her shoulders lowering as her mind wandered. She loved the way he spoke, so eloquent and calm; she could listen to him for days on end. And then his smile. His heart-clenchingly, gorgeous smile that never failed to make her weak in the knees. And then there were his kisses, kisses that made her feel like she was floating on a cloud. Kisses that made her forget everything else in the world. Kisses that she _dreamt_ of when she slept. Rin felt the tears roll down her cheeks as she lifted her fingers to her mouth, _kisses that made her fall head over heels in love every, single day. _

"Did you see that dress Hana was wearing?" A woman scoffed as she entered the bathroom, her stiletto heels echoing onto the marble floor. Rin froze, scrunching herself up into a ball; the woman's scathing tone was familiar. "I mean who wears last years couture to an event of this magnitude? How utterly low-class."

Another woman spoke, her voice unfamiliar to Rin. "Well I'm sure we won't be seeing much of her anytime soon. Did you see the way her husband was looking at Iso Musimi's daughter?" She cackled, "That trash will be returning to the dump soon enough."

"Oh," a high-pitched voice came next, "How I do love a scandal." The woman smirked, walking towards the mirror to inspect her makeup. "And what was that thing around Ami's neck? It looked hideously similar to a snake."

Natsumi smiled wickedly, primping her long locks in the mirror. "Mm, and did you see how delectable Sesshomaru looked tonight?" She curled a long piece with her finger, "Or should I say, how delectable he looks every night?" She laughed, delighted with herself, "Oh, how I cannot wait until that pitiful little girl he calls a wife gets her heart torn into pieces when she wakes up from her pathetic little fantasy."

Rin cringed, struggling to contain herself from crying out. _Don't listen to her Rin, _she told herself, _she's just a bitter, jealous old hag. _

Natsumi continued, "Eventually she'll come to her senses and realize that she's nothing more to him than a brief, meaningless tryst. I mean honestly, what does she have to offer? A flower shop? Oh! Maybe she bakes him cookies filled with cuddles and rainbows," she snorted, her tone laced with sarcasm, "Pathetic. When the day comes that Sesshomaru realizes how much time he's wasted with her, their marriage will end and she'll be back where she belongs. Alone in her silly little shop, while a string of _real_ women will step in to _ease_ his pain." She leaned over the counter, pursing her lips, "And if I play my cards right, I'll be one of them." She laughed, "I'm thinking of wife number 3?" Natsumi smirked, fantasizing of a life full of luxury. She extended a toned arm towards her friend, "Kaoru, darling, hand me some of your lipstick, won't you?"

"Of course," Kaoru fished out a silver tube from her purse, "Wife number 3 has a nice ring to it." Kaoru turned to face the mirror, "His wife was that little girl wearing the white lace dress, wasn't she? Vintage Chanel? Hm," she touched up her eye-shadow before bending low to adjust the length of her mid-knee dress. "At least her sense of fashion is better than most people."

Natsumi rolled her eyes, "She probably has a stylist. Kami knows that someone like her needs one."

"What makes you think they'll divorce?" The other woman asked, changing her long diamond earrings to pearl studs, "He seemed smitten."

"Honestly Emi, isn't it obvious? Their marriage is a farce." Natsumi turned to face the women, "Everyone knows that he has affairs with his mistresses while she sits alone at home, thinking that he's 'busy' with work." She raised a delicate brow, "I really should feel bad for her, but I don't. She's naive to think that he's _in love_ with her, that he would even subscribe to such a foolish notion. She's nothing more than a mere schoolchild; how pathetic of her to think that she's _enough_ for him."

Kaoru laughed, rolling her eyes, "Uneducated, classless and rather plain, it's a wonder that they've made it this far."

Natsumi nodded, "What he needs is a real woman, not a girl playing princess."

"True," Kaoru tsked, "She didn't even talk to anyone tonight. How is she supposed to move in social circles if she just stands there in the corner like a scared cat?"

"And the way they act in public, you know that they must be over-compensating." Natsumi checked her nails, "And her miscarriage?" She sneered as she held her hand to her heart, "Augh, don't even get me started on that."

Emi frowned, "What of it?"

"I hear it's a ruse." Natsumi's brows lifted, "I've been told that this miscarriage is her third, the first being right after their engagement. How... _coincidental_, don't you think?"

Rin felt cold, her head hanging low as her eyes clouded with tears. Her mind went numb as she took in the harsh comments about their marriage. About her miscarriage. _They all think that it's a lie..._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>"You," Sesshomaru's gaze darted to the waiters as he walked past, "Have you seen my wife?"<p>

"Uh," the man shook his head, "No, I'm so sorry sir."

Sesshomaru sighed, thoroughly agitated, "Well why don't you find her," he hissed, turning on his heel and walked briskly down the hall. He had checked their rooms, the garden, the kitchen and every other goddamn room in Murasaki's country house and yet he still could not find her. _It was like she disappeared. _

"Um," a slip of a girl called out to him, her countenance filled with nerves as she found herself standing in front of the handsome man, "Excuse me, sir?"

"Hn." Sesshomaru lazily eyed the girl, "What is it?" His voice was laced with displeasure.

"Y-your wife, sir. She's in the bathroom." She winced as Sesshomaru growled, "I... she's been in there for awhile sir and I..."

_Awhile, _his eyes flashed with anger,"Then why is it that we are still standing here?"

"I," her eyes widened, "Oh, I'm so sorry sir, please, this way." She scurried to down the hall to the woman's bathroom, holding the door open for Sesshomaru.

"Make sure no one enters," he told her, flipping the lock with his finger. His footsteps echoed on the marble floors as he searched the room for any sign of Rin. As he neared the tall wall he could hear her whimpers and soon he found her sitting alone in a chair, her make-up ruined and her nose running. Her eyes were red, refusing to look up at him.

"Rin," he murmured, kneeling down to sit in front of her. He reached out to stroke her cheek, his own heart clenching as she winced and pulled away. She continued to cry, her body shaking. _Do you cry because of me? _"Rin," he tried again, his tone soft, "Why are you crying?"

"Maru,"she whispered, her gaze lifting to meet his. She then pushed herself off her chair and fell into his arms. "Maru," she spoke his name like a chant, setting her head on his shoulder. She cried for what seemed like hours, until Sesshomaru stood up from the floor, his legs feeling numb. He held her steady as he sunk into the chair, Rin still curled up against him, her head buried in the crook of his neck.

Minutes later Rin spoke, her crying subsiding, "I-," her lips quivered, her thin frame still shaking, "Fake," she whispered, lifting her head. She sniffed, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand, "A lie." Her hands curled around his suit jacket, clutching the expensive fabric in her fists. "They all think it's a lie," she murmured, "They all think that I don't belong with you."

"Who," he asked, demanding to know who had upset her, "Who said that to you?"

She fell silent, her brown eyes filling once more with tears, "Does it matter?" Her heart felt broken as she took in small breaths, "They all think that we don't belong together." She traced designs with her fingers onto his torso, "I used to be able to ignore it Maru, the little digs, the insults, but not anymore." She buried her face in his chest, wishing that she could hide with him forever, "I can't do _this_ anymore." _I can't do this alone anymore. _She wept, _I need you. I need my Maru to come back. _

Sesshomaru stilled, closing his eyes as he felt her tears drip onto his skin. He felt torn, willing himself to remember all of her, their time together, their marriage, but he couldn't. _He felt so lost._ He knew that he cared for her, that he felt _something_ for her. And yet, he no longer knew how to comfort her. _As much as he tried, he no longer knew who she was. Who _he_ was._ "Rin," he murmured, rubbing her back, "Who said this to you?"

"You shouldn't have married me," she whispered, evading his question, "You should have married someone else."

"Someone else," he frowned, watching as Rin played with his tie.

"You know, sometimes..." Rin shifted as her voice cracked, wrapping his left hand with hers, "Sometimes I wish we had never met." Her chest tightened at the thought, _a life without Sesshomaru._ "Because then, maybe I wouldn't have been such a burden to you." _And then maybe, _she thought selfishly, playing with his wedding band, _my heart would have never known such pain. _

"A burden," he murmured, linking his fingers through his. "Rin, you're not a burden to me."

She shook her head, "I am. Everyone thinks that I'm not good enough for you." _It's like her fears were being echoed by those women. _"They all think that this," she gestured to his wedding ring, "Is a lie."Rin's hand trembled as she removed his wedding ring and placed it into his hand."I keep wondering, it just... doesn't make sense to me." She licked her lips, "Why didn't you marry her Maru?" she asked, brushing her fingers along his wrist, "She was so _perfect_ for you." _Your true other half._

Sesshomaru knitted his brows, "Her?"

"Kagura." Rin watched as his hand closed tightly over the ring, "You never told me about her."

"She was..." Sesshomaru swallowed, his throat dry. "She..." That single moment still felt so fresh in his mind, "Kagura was the one to end the engagement." He frowned as he remembered that day. He remembered sitting with Kagura in their luxurious penthouse, her bags packed and her engagement ring in his hand.

_'We don't love each other Sesshomaru,' she explained, 'You must know that I don't love you. I care for you deeply, and I know you do too, but there is no love.' She gave him a sad smile, 'I've come to realize that I need that. I don't want to have a loveless marriage like your parents, like my parents. And I know that deep down inside, you don't want that either. That's why this has to end.' She leaned forward to kiss his cheek, lifting her bags in her hands, 'Goodbye Sesshomaru.' She left the suite, pausing for a brief moment at the door, 'Sesshomaru,' she smiled as she turned her head, 'I hope you meet her one day.' _

He remembered the feeling in the pit of his stomach as he watched her walk out the door. The feeling of his insides knotting together. But the pain was not from a broken heart, but of a blow to his ego.

He glanced to Rin, _I did meet her, _he asked himself, _didn't I_? _This girl, the one who he... loved?_

Rin's lips quivered, "I..." _So she truly was second best. _

"Enough!" Sesshomaru growled fiercely, pulling her chin towards him, "Why is it that you think so lowly of yourself?" He hissed, "Why do you constantly think that you're worthless?"

"I..." Rin cried, jerking herself from his hold, "I don't know." She pushed herself off of his lap and walked to the sink. "I don't know," she whispered, wrapping her hands around the countertop. She struggled to stifle her crying, wiping her tears with her mascara stained hand.

Sesshomaru cursed, pushing his ring back onto his finger. His heart felt heavy as he stood from the chair, making his way towards Rin. _She cried because of him. He had hurt her so much_. _He didn't deserve her. _He wrapped his arm around her small waist, pulling Rin closer to his form. _She deserved so much more. _He pushed her long, soft hair to the side and pressed a firm kiss on her neck. _He had been selfish their entire relationship, stealing her away from other men. _He placed his hand against her flat belly, cursing himself. _He had taken her innocence and yet he still couldn't say those three words he knew she craved. _Sesshomaru met her gaze through the mirror, _it is you who deserves so much more than me. _

Rin broke the silence, her eyes closing as she spoke, "Do you know what it's like to be unwanted Sesshomaru?" She felt her chest constrict as her voice cracked, "To feel like you're not good enough? To feel like you'll never be happy?" Her eyes filled with tears, "I was seven when my family died. I had a ballet recital that day and I remember looking out to the crowd and seeing three empty seats. I remember how happy the other girls' families looked, how proud they were of their daughter. For a moment I thought that maybe they didn't come because I didn't dance well. Maybe they were embarrassed by me?" She sniffed, softly laughing at the memory, "And then I remember sitting in the corner backstage, watching as their dads came by and gave them flowers, congratulating them for doing such a good job. But my family never came. My dad never gave me his big bear hug and my mom never got the chance to give me a kiss. My brother never teased me about looking like a doll in the tutu because they never came." She cried, "They didn't show up."

"And then I went to the orphanage." She shuddered at the memory, "I didn't have any friends in there, they all thought I was weird. That I was cursed," she sniffed, "I hated it there. I hated it so much because all I wanted was to be back home. But eventually, I realized I was never going to go home. It took three years for me to understand that my parents weren't coming back for me. That's when I started to try to get adopted." She let out a shaky breath, "Every Saturday, all the kids would dress up in their best clothes and be on their best behavior. And every Saturday, I would put on my orange sundress and try to smile, try to have someone want to take me home with them." She leaned back into Sesshomaru's hold, "But I was never adopted." Rin clenched her eyes shut, "No one wanted me."

She tried to wipe away the tears, looking at their reflection, "I thought that maybe I was never supposed to fall in love. That I was never supposed to have a happily ever after. I thought that maybe I'd live vicariously through Ayame and Kouga for the rest of my life. But then I met you," she cursed, "Sesshomaru Takahashi. You were perfect," she clenched the countertop until her hands were raw, "You were so perfect. I tried so hard not to fall for you. I tried to remind myself that you couldn't like someone like me. You? The billionaire's son? With me? The pathetic, orphaned little girl without a penny to her name. Kami, it's like a stupid love story." She sniffed, feeling the moisture around her nose.

She turned to face him, "I want to hate you so much." She embraced him, her head tucked against his chest, "I want to hate you, but I can't." Her shoulders shook as she she cried, "I can't." Her chest heaved with each sob, "I'm still so hopelessly in love with you." Tears blinded her sight, she could feel her nose drip, his arms wrapped securely around her.

Sesshomaru lifted her chin, wiping her tears with away with his thumb. She leaned her head into his hand, "You'll always have my heart," she whispered, "Forever."

"Forever," he echoed, holding her closer, "You're much too foolish," he murmured, _but was he really speaking to her? _"Too naive to believe in things like love."

Rin closed her eyes, embracing the warmth of his touch, "Is it really so wrong to believe in love?"

"It's foolish," he replied, watching as Rin reached up to touch his cheek. He was fighting with himself, his mind telling him to reject the notion of their fairytale romance. But his heart? His grip on her tightened, "To love is to be vulnerable."

She looked up at him, her eyes gleaming with tears, "And trusting that the one you love does no harm to you."

He scoffed, looking away as his chest tightened, "It's a whimsical fabrication bought by the weak of society."

"I'd rather love once than live my life not knowing true love."

"True love?" He quipped, his response a reflex, "You think what we had was true love?"

She laughed, "Yes. However foolish it may be, however much it hurts to remember, I fell wholeheartedly in love with you." She wiped her nose with the back of her hand, "I'll miss this the most." She whispered, resting her head against his chest, "Just being with you like this."

He was silent for a moment, "You should hate me." _After all the things he had done to her, she had the right to despise him._

Rin opened her eyes, "I know." She lifted her hands to his cheeks, brushing her thumb against his cool skin, "I should have said no. I should have stopped seeing you after the first date. After the first kiss." She felt her heart squeeze, "After the first time I told you that I loved you." _And you said nothing. _

He held his hand against hers, his amber gaze penetrating, "Yet you didn't."

"I didn't," she spoke softly, lifting herself onto her tiptoes. "Kiss me Maru," she requested, placing her small hands against his broad chest, "Pretend that you love me. Pretend that you wake up everyday thanking Kami that I'm in your life. Pretend that without me..." she trailed off, her eyes watering, "You'd be empty."

He looked deep into her eyes, his honey eyes melting, "Without you," He kissed her hand, her wrist, and brought it down, "I'd be miserable." He pulled her closer and leant down, feeling her warm breath about his nose. "Without you, I'd be lost." He kissed her lips, savoring her taste, the feel of her lips. "Without you," he kissed her nose, her cheek, "I'd forget the beauty of the natural world. I'd forget how to laugh, how to smile." He pressed his lips against hers once more, "Without you," he pulled away to kiss her rings, "I wouldn't know what it is to be truly happy."

Rin clung to him, the tears streaming down her face. "You're a wonderful liar."

He exhaled, closing his eyes. He breathed in her sweet scent, _without you, _he thought, _I wouldn't know love._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Later that evening Rin sat on their bed, combing out her braid as she listened to the shower running from the bathroom. She blushed as she recalled the rest of the night. They had danced for the longest time, Sesshomaru remaining by her side the entire time. He had been so sweet, his hand holding hers as they mingled with the guests, his lips finding hers in the brief moments of seclusion. <em>It was like her Maru was back. <em>By the end of the night Sesshomaru had taken hold of her, bending low to kiss her lips. 'I'm rather bored with this event,' he began, whispering in her ear, his tone marked with desire, 'Shall we retire to our bedroom?'

She shivered at the memory, her nerves on edge. She rose from the bed and laid the brush onto the nightside table, walking to the closet to retrieve the garment bag. She unzipped the bag and hung it onto the door, turning her body so her back faced the bed. She hummed as she looked at herself in the mirror, rubbing out a black smudge around her eye.

At that moment Sesshomaru walked into the bedroom, wearing nothing but a black towel wrapped around his muscular hips. She blushed as she ran over his lean figure, her eyes widening at the sight of a long scar running along the side of his chest. _The accident. _Her cheeks were bright red as she fought to keep her emotions in check. She ripped her gaze from him and concentrated on trying to undress. Her hand reached over her back, struggling to reach for the zipper.

"It seems that you need my help," he murmured, his hand already seeking the zipper. Rin gulped as he pulled it down, exposing her back to him. He then unhooked her bra, pushing the gown off her thin form until it lay in a pool by her feet. She shivered, feeling self-conscious, wrapping her arms around her small waist.

"Beautiful," he murmured, trailing his hand down her back. "Breathtakingly beautiful."

Her heart clenched, "Sesshomaru," she whispered, her eyes gleaming with tears, "I-"

"Shh," Sesshomaru pulled her towards him. "Let me make love to you," he requested as he turned her to face him, his eyes molten amber.

Rin felt the tears drip down her cheek, fighting with herself to submit to her desire, "But what if you don't remember?" She clenched her hands against his chest, "What if you wake up tomorrow and you _hate_ me."

He remained silent, caressing her soft skin. He pulled her close, leaning down to take her lips. "I'll remember," he promised, whispering sweet nothings into her ear. With those words Rin threw caution to the wind, wrapping her arms around his neck. She responded eagerly to each touch, pulling his towel away with her hand.

_Love me, _she thought, looking into his eyes as he laid her on the bed, tugging off her black panties. She ignored the ache in her heart, _pretend that I'm still yours. _

They stayed in their passionate embrace for what felt like an eternity, their time together marked with soft caresses, fervent touches and kisses. And when they peaked for the last time, Rin felt her chest tighten, her nails digging into his back.

_It was like a dream._

Afterwards Rin watched as he fell asleep, her head resting next to his on the large pillow. "Maru," she whispered, caressing his cheek, struggling not to fall asleep. She knew her thoughts were irrational, foolish even, but she was scared to sleep. Scared that she would wake up tomorrow and have _her_ Maru disappear. Have her Maru replaced by a man who despised her, who thought her to be worthless. _A man who wanted to end their marriage. _

Despite how hard she fought to stay awake, her eyes eventually felt heavy, her breaths slowing. _Maru, _she pleaded, succumbing to sleep, _please don't forget me. _

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Hours later Sesshomaru woke, his arm reaching over for her warm body. "Rin?" He called out her name, his voice scratchy with sleep. He blearily opened his eyes, those honey orbs softening as he found Rin's back towards him, her nude body basking in the moon's light. He kept silent, watching as Rin rose from the large bed and bent down to pick up his dress shirt. She touched the cotton fabric, her face hidden by her hair as she folded the garment and placed it on the foot of the bed. Sesshomaru felt his chest constrict as she went through her luggage, pulling on a cream-colored silk robe.<p>

_She didn't wear my shirt. _

He frowned, remembering the countless times she had jumped out of bed and donned his shirt without hesitation. As he closed his eyes and reminisced, he envisioned her bright smile and her infectious giggles. He pictured her dancing like a ballerina, laughing with children and embracing him without hesitation.

_He truly missed her. His Rin. A young woman who was always so positive, so energetic and full with life. A young woman who could make him laugh at the oddest things, who wore her heart on her sleeve. A woman who's innocence made him so fiercely protective, so fiercely devoted. A woman with an ethereal beauty who he treasured, who had captured his attention by falling from the sky. _

But because of the accident, _she_ was gone too.

_His Rin._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p><em>Rin giggled as she walked up to him, her feet bare, her hair a tangled mess, wearing nothing but a grey button down that reached her knees. "Don't you think I look better in your shirts than you do?" <em>

_Sesshomaru chuckled, wrapping his arm around her lithe body, "Much." He bent down to kiss her, pulling her closer to his form. He smirked as she stepped onto his feet, using them for leverage so she could wrap her arms around his neck. _

_"You're too tall," she muttered playfully, pulling back for air. She ran her hands down his chest, marveling at how his body responded to her touch._

_"Or are you too short?" He whispered, his breath hoarse as her hand traveled lower and lower. He growled, grasping her wrist, "Don't start what you can't finish." He looked into Rin's eyes, daring her to continue. _

_"Hmm," Rin cocked her head to the side, glancing quickly at his office door, "Well lunch ends in three minutes..."_

_He smirked, raising a brow suggestively, "And?"_

_"And that means I gotta go back to work!" She bolted out of his hold, squealing with laughter at the sight of dejection on his face. She quickly turned to unbutton the shirt before Sesshomaru pressed her against his desk, his voice dripping with want. "I've decided to take you against your will," he murmured, pushing his shirt to the side and watched with delight as it revealed her ivory skin. He pressed his lips to her shoulders, shivers running down Rin's spine._

_"That won't be necessary," she replied as she bent her neck, lifting herself up onto her tiptoes to kiss him. She grinned, lips still flush against his, as he turned her around and set her on top of his desk. She wrapped her legs around his waist, moaning as his fingers worked their magic. "Mm, Sesshomaru," She whispered, resting her forehead against his, "I love you."_

_Sesshomaru paused, willing himself to speak. He was silent as he wiped her bangs to the side and pressed a firm kiss on her forehead. Rin smiled in return, her eyes remaining bright. She leaned up and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, "Kiss me," she requested, her eyes closing as his lips pressed against her own. _

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin wiped her eyes as she looked over the scenery, her hold on the rails tightening as the cool night air moved over her. She was having a hard time falling asleep, the little voice in the back of her mind never stopping.<p>

_What if he doesn't remember?_

She whimpered, falling to the ground. She wrapped her arms around her knees, resting her forehead against her forearms. She wished she could have truly enjoyed the night, trusting that Sesshomaru would remember everything in due time. And as silly as it was, every night since the accident she wished upon the stars that everything would return to the way it was. That she would wake up the next day and find her husband sleeping next to her. But she couldn't rely on such whimsical notions, she couldn't remain the same naive little girl any longer.

_She couldn't believe in happily ever afters anymore._

"Do you find that you have an attraction to the floor?"

Rin gasped as she looked up, _she hadn't heard the balcony doors open. _"I-" she hesitated, her eyes roaming over his body, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up."

"It's fine," he walked towards her, lazily stretching out to her right. He leant against the railings, pulling her legs into his lap. "Thinking again?" He teased, caressing her calves.

She nodded, shivering at his touch. Soon she crawled over, losing herself in his embrace. She closed her eyes, enjoying the feel of his warm, hard form against hers. "Maru," she whispered, curling into his arms, "I'm scared," she admitted. "I'm scared to wake up tomorrow." She felt his hold on her tighten, "I don't want to wake up alone again."

He stroked her hair, "I promise you Rin, I'm fighting to remember you."

She gave him a soft, watery smile. "Thank you," she murmured sincerely, leaning forward to kiss him. As she pulled away she pressed her palm against his cheek, giggling at the thought that popped up in her mind. "Maru," she traced his collarbone, "If you do remember tonight, I want you to send me some marshmallows."

He laughed, the sound delighting her senses, "Marshmallows?"

She nodded, "Marshmallows." She tucked her head underneath his chin, "The big, white, fluffy ones."

"Very well." He toyed with her silk robe, amused with her idea. _It was like his Rin was back. _"The auction tonight," he began, looking up at the night sky, "I placed a bid."

"Really?" She ran over the list of items in her mind, "What did you bid on?"

"A shiba inu. It's a purebred litter, with your choice of pup." He fell silent as Rin pushed herself up to sit upon his lap. He hesitated before he continued, "It was our plan, wasn't it? To have a pup in time for the..." he trailed off, his hand resting on her belly.

"Baby," Rin finished, her eyes filling with tears. She remember the day she had come home with a picture frame of a baby and a puppy. She had spoken vocally for the next week about adopting a dog to have as a playmate for their child, but he had always rejected the idea. "You really got me a puppy?" She laughed, wiping her eyes, "Oh Sesshomaru," she threw her arms around his neck, "I've always wanted a puppy."

"Hn," Sesshomaru felt the sides of his mouth lift, _she was so happy,_ "You like it then?"

"So much," Rin pictured the small puppy, he would be so chubby and soft. "Thank you." She pecked his cheek, grinning wide, "So that means, if all goes well, I get a puppy and marshmallows?"

He smirked, brushing her bangs to the side, "Aren't you the luckiest girl in the world."

She smiled wistfully laid her head on top of his chest, "I hope so." She shifted in his lap, her back firmly pressed against his torso as they watched the night sky together. Rin closed her eyes as she spotted a shooting star, making a wish as she felt Sesshomaru press a kiss to the top of her head.

_Dear Star..._

* * *

><p>xoxo<p>

tuille


	15. Chapter 15

chapter 15

by

tuille

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><p>disclaimer: anything you recognize, i do not own<p>

* * *

><p>uh, hello, fancy meeting you here. oh, me? yeah, i've just been hibernating for the past three or so months :P<p>

* * *

><p>The next morning Sesshomaru found himself waking first. He glanced down at their bodies, hers curled next to his, both of them intertwined in a sea of silk. <em>She was beautiful, <em>he thought, lifting his shoulders to watch her sleep. Her head rested on his chest, her hair long and tangled, her ivory shoulders seemingly glowing from the sun. He sighed deeply, lifting the blankets to cover her petite form.

He closed his eyes as he reflected upon the night before_, it_ _was like a dream. Her touch, the way she called his name, the way she smiled. No, _he thought, his eyes opening,_ he would never forget it. _His hand rested on her back, his fingers touching her warm skin. They moved along her spine like delicate brushes, caressing her body with each stroke.

_She had been so scared that he would not remember last night. _He frowned, pinching the arch of his nose, _scared that he would not remember her. _He exhaled sharply as the pain in his head suddenly returned. _Kami, she deserved so much more, _he thought, running his hand through her soft hair, _so much better than him_.

His eyes narrowed as she mumbled incoherently, a soft sigh escaping her peach-tinted lips. He stilled, his body tense as he watched her hand sneak across his abdomen and rest on his hip. His lips curled as she moaned his name, shifting closer to his form. Sesshomaru chuckled briefly, leaning his head back on the pillows, _are you claiming me little one? _

His mind wandered as he watched her sleep, _are you dreaming of me Rin? The way I dream of you? _That night he had dreamt of dancing with her in a field of flowers. The dream had been so vivid, so crisp, that he was left wondering if it was more than just a dream. _Yet h__ad it been real? Had he danced with her in the middle of a forest, once upon a time? _He sighed one more, despising the doubt that clouded his thoughts.

_A lie. _

A part of his mind was adamant that his marriage to Rin was nothing more than a farce. That part demanded that he return to his previous lifestyle of working hard, _fucking _hard, and living like a king. The same part that had ruled his actions just days ago. Yet when he held her in his arms, it felt so _right. His _Rin. _His wife. _The only woman capable of making him feel so content with life.

_The only one who could make him _**_feel_**.

But had he made her happy? Had he been selfish, to keep her for himself? He had wooed her, enchanting her with his charms, ensuring that she would be forever_ his. _He had taken her affections, her heart_, _her _love_, knowing that he himself could never say those words she craved. He would tell her how beautiful she was, how he missed her, how he _ached_ for her.

_But never those three words. _

He left her eager to please him, leaving her wanting his affections. But was he merely toying with her, ensuring himself a place in his heart?

_He was a fool. _

He had hurt her. Left her broken, _his Rin, _while he touched another woman. While he spoke to her with such a poisonous tongue, touched her with such anger. _His Rin. _

_He felt sick. _

This feeling, this deep twisting in his heart, the violent pain radiating in his forehead, _he deserved it. _But her, she didn't deserve the pain he had inflicted on her. _No_, he thought, _not his Rin._ She deserved the moon, the stars, the universe. She deserved so much more than what he could give her. She deserved a real man, one who would tell her how he felt. One who would move mountains and oceans to see her smile, one who would be faithful, be loyal, be everything _he_ wasn't.

"Would you be better off without me?" He asked, taking his time to memorize the feel of her against him. How her soft breaths blew against his chest, how her hair tickled his skin, how she spoke in a hushed murmur as she slept. _Was it always like this?_ He mused,_ were their mornings together always so calming? _

His hands tightened into fists as a picture of Rin crying suddenly flashed in his mind.

_He__ was a selfish bastard. _

With a heavy heart he thought back to those words he had said to her, how he had made her cry. "I've hurt you," he whispered, his arms suddenly cold as he traced his fingers along her form. The guilt was eating up inside of him, his chest achingly tight with each breath. He shifted forward, slowly easing her small body off of him. He leant over, running his hand down her cheek, "I don't deserve you," he told her, his words rich with emotion as he placed a firm kiss on her forehead.

Carefully he made his way off the bed and into the bathroom where he showered and dressed for the day. He donned a simple white cotton button-down and fitted grey trousers, playing with his wedding band as he returned to the bedroom. His gaze flickered to the small figure lying on the left, her hands clutching the blankets tightly.

_Last night she had cried. Kami, _he struggled to swallow his guilt, _when she did, it was like a knife stabbing his chest. _

"Forgive me," he murmured, allowing himself one last moment to feel her skin. _The decision was made, albeit foolish and rash. _His fingers trailed over the smooth skin of her rose-tinted cheeks, his amber eyes storming as he thought of leaving her. _It was for the best, _he reminded himself, _for her. _He could no longer subject her to his selfish whims. He could no longer hurt her. It was inevitable, the pain she would suffer being with him. His eyes were steel as he tucked the blankets under her chin, leaving the bedroom with his mind set.

_He was a fool, but it would be for the best if he let her go._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin blushed as she woke up, her naked skin flush against the warm blankets as she remembered last night. <em>We made love, <em>she thought, turning her head to the left. She rubbed her eyes as she yawned, her hand cold against her skin. Her shoulders fell at the sight of a pillow next to her, _where is he? _Her heart clenched as she pushed herself up to a sitting position. Tears welled up in the corners of her eyes, _don't think the worst, _she urged herself, _he always wakes up early. _She sniffed, folding her hands in her lap, _maybe he's just getting coffee. _She looked around the room eagerly, latching onto the small sliver of hope she had remaining. _Or maybe he's just getting breakfast. _

_Or maybe he forgot, _that little voice in the back of her head mocked her, _maybe he just doesn't care for you. _

"No," her voice wavered, her hands shaking as she lifted the covers off of herself. She willed herself to be strong. _He promised, _she told herself, stepping onto the cold floors,_ he promised that he would remember. _

_She had to trust him. Had to believe that he cared. That what they had was real. _

Her lips quivered as she reached down for her suitcase, her thin body shivering as a cold wind blew into the room. She rummaged through her garments until she found a printed silk dress. She smiled fondly as she stroked the silk, enjoying the pastel brushstrokes that covered the white knee-length dress. She dressed herself slowly, taking care to look presentable. _Because maybe, _she thought fleetingly, _maybe he would tell her that she looked beautiful again. _

She giggled as she ran her hand through her hair, tying it up into a soft, braided bun. She pursed her lips as she put on a thin coat of lipgloss, facing the mirror on the dresser as she added a touch of rose-colored eyeshadow.

"Rin."

Rin jumped as she heard his voice, the makeup falling onto the floor, "Sess-sesshomaru." Her voice was timid as she bowed her head to greet him, blushing as she smiled, "Good morning."

Her heart beat rapidly as she watched him look back at her, his stormy eyes darkening. Her smile fell as he didn't reply. He stood erect, looking at her like she was nothing. She felt her eyes prickle with tears, _why did it have to be so awkward? Why couldn't she run to him and greet him with a kiss? Why couldn't she smile and laugh and not feel like a misbehaved child?_

Her small hands curled in, her heart already heavy. _How she wished it could be like it used to be._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p><em>Rin rubbed her eyes as she walked down the staircase of their penthouse, yawning as she languidly took her time. She rounded the corner, smiling as she caught sight of her husband of fifteen days eating breakfast. Her smile turned into a grin as her gaze moved appreciatively over his form, her cheeks already flushing red. Her footsteps were silent on the hardwood floor as she walked towards him. "Good morning," she greeted softly, pressing her cheek against his back as she wrapped her arms around his naked torso. <em>

_Sesshomaru raised his brows as he turned his head to greet her, setting his coffee on the kitchen counter. "Good morning," he returned, reaching behind him to pull her into his embrace. He chuckled as she squealed, gently pushing her back against the marble counters. "How was your night?" He asked, his voice husky as he pressed kisses along the slight curve of her neck. _

_Rin giggled, moving her head to nuzzle her nose against his, "Fantastic, you should have been there," she teased, gently nipping his lips with her teeth. "I had the most amazing night. Honestly, I don't think I got any sleep."_

_Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed, "You minx," he growled, bending__ down to catch her lips. _

_Rin moaned in delight as his strong hands gripped her waist and brought her closer to his form. She whimpered in delight as his tongue delved into her warm cavity, digging her fingers into his shoulders. "Mmm," she moaned, her body was putty in his hands as he moulded it, bringing her pleasure with every touch. "Maru," she panted as he pulled back, that knowing smirk donning his visage as he lifted her chin. "Wow." She held a hand to her heart, laughing as their eyes met. "Good morning to you too," she joked, taking in a deep breath of air as she tried to calm her heart._

_"Rin," Sesshomaru began, tracing her lips with his thumb, "I don't wish to return to work today." _

_"No?" Rin grinned, "Then don't!" She jumped up onto her tiptoes, clapping her hands together, "Stay home with me. Pretend our flight was delayed and that we're still alone on that island. Just you and me," she sang, "Making sweet, sweet love all day and night." _

_He smiled, brushing her bangs to the side. Her hair was messy this morning, thrown haphazardly into a bun. She wore nothing more than his shirt he had worn on the flight back to Tokyo. And despite the black smudges in the corners of her eyes from her mascara, she had never been more beautiful. "What should I tell the boss then?" _

_She bit her lip, "Wait... aren't you the boss?" In all honesty, she didn't really know what his job title was._

_He chuckled, bringing her closer, "No. Not yet," he rested his chin atop of her head, "Perhaps one day." _

_"Oh." Rin pouted, "Because I want one more day of just..." She trailed off, blushing as she thought back to their honeymoon. Their honeymoon was truly perfect; two weeks of them laying in the sun, making love and falling asleep in each others embrace. _

_"Sex?" Sesshomaru teased, enjoying the way she fought with herself to contain her embarrassment._

_"No," she flushed red, "Just... being alone with you." She sputtered at the look of disbelief on his face, "Sesshomaru! I'm serious. I just want to spend one more day cuddling with my new husband. No boring work calls, no contracts for you to read, no meetings and no Jaken," she made a face, "Pestering me to stop interrupting your work." _

_Sesshomaru thought carefully of what she said, "No work." He weighed his options, finding one much more pleasurable than the other, "Just you and me?" _

_Rin nodded, "Just you and me." She grinned as his eyes darkened with lust, knowing she had managed to sway him. She cheered happily as Sesshomaru picked her up bridal style, carrying her up to their bedroom. _

_"Jet lag," Sesshomaru told her, quickly sending an email to his assistant, "I, nor you, have yet to acclimatize to Tokyo hours. Therefore I'm taking one more day off." _

_"Perfect," Rin purred as Sesshomaru set his phone on the nightstand and shucked his briefs off his form. She giggled as he rolled over on top of her, wrapping her arms around his neck, "I love cuddling with you." _

_"Do you?" Sesshomaru quickly unbuttoned her shirt, "You know," he leant down to kiss her lips, "I've waited more than a year to 'cuddle' with you." _

_"Oh," Rin blushed, her fingers running over his chest,"Well...I'm glad you did." _

_Sesshomaru smiled, her heart melting as he pressed a kiss on her forehead, "As am I."_

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p><em>Cuddling, <em>Rin thought, her gaze faltering. _Kami, how she ached to be in his arms. _

Finally he gave her a curt nod, "Morning." _Let her go, _he told himself, restraining himself from pulling her into his embrace. He ignored the overwhelming urge to feel for himself how soft her dress was, forcing himself to think of work instead of how soft her lips looked in the morning. He moved stiffly towards the side of the bed, focusing as he lifted his briefcase into his hand. "Murasaki is holding an impromptu meeting this morning with his business associates," his voice was emotionless as he continued, "That he wishes me to attend. It begins in ten minutes."

"I... of course," Rin watched as he opened the briefcase and removed various files. Her lips quivered, her heart racing, _do you remember? _Her brown eyes darted to his, searching them for a hint of _her_ Maru. Her heart sunk as he pulled out those photographs, following each one as they were laid onto the bed. She looked back at his visage, _stone cold, _she thought bitterly, _it was like nothing happened last night. _

"After the meeting we will leave and return to Tokyo." He glanced down at the photos, turning them over so the backs were revealed, "Jaken will have a car ready to take you back to ou-your home." He traced the messages she had written on the photographs with his finger, his chest tight with every word, "Do you understand?"

She nodded dully, feeling the ache in her side return, "Hai." She suddenly felt more like a ward than his wife. _She knew that he wouldn't remember. She was foolish to think that he would suddenly become warm and affectionate. That he would pick her up and twirl her around like he used to when they woke up. _She bowed her head, her voice soft. "I'll start packing."

"Fine," he turned to leave, "I'll return in an hour."

"Hai." Rin stood in the centre of the room until the bedroom doors closed. "You don't remember," she whispered, her heart breaking. "You promised," she muttered, sniffing as she fought to control her emotions, "You promised." She struggled to hold in her tears, _it had been going so well. _

_Don't cry, _she told herself as she walked to the bed, gathering the photos and files into her hands. She set them into his bag, foolishly hoping that perhaps the photos would trigger a memory. _But maybe he doesn't want them anymore, _she thought, her shoulders low, _just like he doesn't want me._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>"It was so lovely to see you again Murasaki-sama," Rin kissed the older man's cheek gently, "Thank you for your hospitality."<p>

"Of course, of course," Murasaki waved his hands, "Please, if you ever need a break from the world, feel free to come for a visit."

"That sounds splendid," Rin giggled, thanking Murasaki as he held the door open for her to the car.

"And you," Murasaki glanced at Sesshomaru, setting his hand atop of the smooth silver car, "Take care of my favorite girl, won't you?"

Sesshomaru's jaw tensed momentarily as he glanced at Rin who looked back nervously. "Would you expect nothing less?" He quickly covered up with a smooth retort, shaking Murasaki's hand, "I'll see you Thursday at the board meeting."

Murasaki nodded, closing Rin's door, "Of course, Thursday. Have a safe drive."

"Hn," Sesshomaru stepped into his car, adjusting the mirrors as he buckled his seatbelt with his other hand.

Rin bit her lip as she watched him shift into drive, speeding away from the large villa. Her shoulders lowered as she sunk into the chair, her eyes listless as she watched the trees blur into green blob. _Will I see you again after this? _She wondered, her eyes tearing as she played with her rings.

After half an hour Rin sat up in her seat, spotting the black limo that was to take her to her home. "Sesshomaru-sama," she murmured gently, pointing to the parking lot, "Jaken's there already."

Sesshomaru frowned as he looked at his assistant who was pacing on the asphalt, "Hn." _Sama, _he thought, his eyebrow twitching. It irked him that she used such a formal title for him.

"Um," she bit her lip, "Maybe, maybe you should slow down," she noted; there was only a few meters before he needed to turn.

Sesshomaru's shoulders tensed as he thought of leaving Rin. _He didn't want to be away from her, _he thought, shifting up in gear instead of pulling over, _not yet. _

Rin's eyes widened as they zoomed past Jaken, "W-wait! You missed him!"

"Did you want me to stop?" He asked, his tone cold.

Rin gasped, "I... no," she whispered, focusing on the dashboard. _What was going on with him? He was so... infuriating! So utterly and completely frustrating. Was he just toying with her emotions? _"Why do you keep doing this?" She asked him, her voice a mere whimper, "Why do you keep being so... difficult? You act like you hate me, but then you... you..." She knew it was childish to throw a tantrum, that if anything, she was proving him right. _That maybe she really was just a foolish little girl. _

"Kami," she sniffed as she wiped her eyes, "I hate this," she muttered, looking away from him. _She was so stupid to think that she could ever truly make him happy. Foolish, really, to cling onto a dream she desperately wanted to be fulfilled. To be his wife. To be so in love with a man who she would spend the rest of her life with. Foolish, little Rin._

"Rin," his gaze softened as he looked to her briefly, his resolve dissolving at the sight of her tears. He was furious with himself, the conflicting halves of his mind battling to rule. _He made her cry, again. _

"Damnit," he cursed, the anger inside of him boiling as he pulled off onto the shoulder of the highway. He took a deep breath to calm himself, _let her go_. His grip on the steering wheel tightened, _she deserves better, _he told himself. _So much better. _

Five minutes past as they sat in the car, a cold tension filling the air. "Sesshomaru," she whispered, looking down at her bare knees. "I know you probably think I'm a naive little girl. And you know what," she felt the tears drip down onto her cheeks, "I probably am." She traced the bruise on her leg from the fall, her chest clenching tightly. "Falling in love with you like I did. So hard, so quickly." Her hands closed together, "But I don't regret it. Any of it." She looked at her rings, "Because I was so happy."

_Even if it was a lie. _

She sniffed, lifting her hand to wipe her nose. "When this is all over, I'll leave." She cupped her hands together, "If that's what you want." She licked her lips, her throat parched. "I... your mother called me a couple of days ago," she began as she leant back into the leather. "Apparently your father told her what happened." She closed her eyes, taking a moment to collect her thoughts. "And she offered to bring me to New York."

Sesshomaru stilled, his form cold. "New York," he repeated, his gaze set upon the odometer.

"Yeah... New York. I... I never told you, but on the day of our wedding, your mother came to talk to me." She laughed softly, shaking her head lightly as she reminisced on that morning. "She told me that I was making a mistake, marrying you. That I would be exactly where I am right now, fighting for a marriage that was never real anyways." She shook her head, cursing her pride, her naivety.

_Perhaps she should have listened._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p><em>Rin let out a deep breath as she stepped into the large bedroom, her heeled feet making a noise as she practiced her march down the aisle. "Head up, look straight, don't trip," she murmured, trying earnestly to look graceful as she strutted past the bed. <em>

_"Rin."_

_Rin froze as she heard that cold voice, turning to face the intruder. "Inukimi," she whispered, curtseying in her dress, "Hello." Her mind scrambled for words, intimidated by the woman's grandeur and sophistication. "Um... uh, good afternoon. Did you have a safe flight? I hope you're enjoying your hotel suite, I made sure your favorite teas were there and..."_

_"Enough." Inukimi raised her hand, holding herself like a queen as she walked towards the smaller girl. "Is that your wedding dress?" She asked, her perfectly arched brow raising as she inspected Rin._

_"H-hai," Rin felt nervous; oh how Inukimi terrified her. From the moment they had met, Rin knew that Inukimi thought she was unfitting to be with someone like Sesshomaru. That she was not good enough for him. On the bright side though, she was the only person in Sesshomaru's family that seemed to dislike her. _

_Inukimi's cold gaze lifted from the dress to Rin,"It's stunning," she remarked, her tone clipped with ice. _

_Rin felt a huge wave of relief wash over her as a smile returned onto her face. Finally, she thought, a compliment. "Thank you," she answered sincerely, "I'm glad you like it." _

_"Hn," Inukimi's eyes narrowed, "Aren't you going to ask for me to have a seat?" _

_Rin felt her heart stop, "Oh! Of course," she bowed, flustered by her lack of grace, "I'm so sorry. Please," she gestured to the small love seat in front of the bed. _

_"Hn," Inukimi straightened her dress out as she took a sat down. "I came here Rin, because I would like to speak with you about your impending wedding to my son." _

_Impending, Rin mused, as in twenty minutes from now? "Of course," she held her hands in front of her, nervously playing with her engagement ring. Her eyes trailed over the older woman's form, admiring how regal she was. Inukimi was truly a beautiful woman, looking no older than 40. She was tall and thin, her features sharp and her long hair exquisite. She never failed to look glamorous, now donning an expensive gown and a long pearl necklace. _

_"You love my son." Inukimi started, her cold blue eyes lifting to meet Rin's. "Do you not?" _

_"Yes," Rin blushed, thinking to how in only a matter of minutes she would be his wife. "Very much so." _

_Inukimi did not hesitate, "Then you will end this farce immediatly." _

_Rin froze, taking a moment to process what she had just heard. "Wh-what?" _

_"Your relationship with my son." She haughtily lifted her chin, "End it now before you hurt yourself and tarnish his name." _

_Rin's vision began to blur, "I-" she stuttered, "I'm not a... no. I love him." She felt her chest tighten, sobs threatening to take over her body. "I love him." _

_Inukimi scrunched her nose in disgust. Crying was for the weak. "It's a shame then, because he certainly does not love you." _

_Rin felt sick, her whole world spinning outrageously out of control. Why was she doing this? They were getting married today. She gripped her hands into fists, "No." She spoke, her voice shaky, taking sharp breathes, urging herself to remain calm. "He loves me," she said, her own voice quivering with self-doubt. When she looked back into Inukimi's eyes she noticed a hint of softness, of pity. _

_"My dear, you're so blinded by your love for him that you are unable to look past a facade." She rose from her seat, "So I'm telling you now, end it today, before your precious little heart breaks. If not, you'll spend your life fighting for something that never truly existed." She touched Rin's cheek, the younger girl flinching at the cold hand, "You little, naive girl. No one can love someone enough to carry a marriage by themselves. Not even you." _

_Rin's chest tightened with every word, looking down at the floor, too ashamed to face the woman. "I know," she whispered finally, "I know that I might get hurt." She closed her eyes, "I know that maybe one day, he'll wake up and leave me." Her voice broke, imagining waking up to an empty, cold bed. "One day, he'll realize he made a mistake of marrying me. But I have to try," she sniffed, wiping away those stubborn tears with the back of her hand, "I have to believe that I can love him enough for the both of us." _

_"You're foolish." _

_"I know." Rin met Inukimi's gaze, suddenly feeling exhausted, "But I have to try. Please," she pleaded, tears gleaming down her porcelain cheeks, "Even if it's only for a moment, I'll make him happy. I promise." She would try her hardest to be the best wife she could be. "And the moment he wants me gone, the moment he wants our marriage to end, I'll leave."_

_Inukimi frowned, "You're a fool Rin, there is no doubt that you will get hurt." _

_Rin's tears blurred her vision as she dabbed her eyes with a napkin. "I know I am." Because here she was, marrying a man who never told her that he loved her. _

_Inukimi tsked, "Then know this. My son is stubborn, he's arrogant, and much too prideful. This man that you've given everything to, could break you heart with a single word." Inukimi's visage softened, a wistful facade appearing on her arched cheeks. "But you make him smile. The last time I've ever seen him so happy was when he was a child." At that moment, Inukimi looked vulnerable as she wistfully thought back to her son's childhood. She rose from her seat, "I wish you luck, little one. Perhaps you'll prove me and the rest of the nay-sayers wrong. Perhaps, you will be with him for the rest of your lives."_

_Rin hung her head, "Perhaps," she murmured, closing her eyes as a single tear fell down her cheek. "Perhaps we'll live happily ever after." _

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>"Your mother offered to fly me out to New York. She says that she has a friend who is an event planner in the city who would be more than willing to hire me on as a florist. Apparently," Rin smiled fondly, "She does the most beautiful weddings with the most glamorous brides of New York. Inukimi thinks I'll be happy there."<p>

"No." Sesshomaru's eyes seeped red, "You're not leaving Tokyo." _Not leaving me. _

Rin frowned, _why did he care? _She looked out the window, "After I talked to your mom," she began, "I started to pour everything I had into our marriage. I stopped being scared and I gave you my everything." _My heart, my soul, my love._ "Who knows," she shrugged bitterly, "Maybe we had five more years together." She wiped her nose with the back of her hand, "But you know what? _This_ is the worst. I could have left if you didn't want me. But this?" She cursed, "Knowing that you don't remember me. Having that little piece of hope that maybe we could still be together if you just could remember? It's the worst." She glanced down, "Having you right beside me, in arms reach, but I can't be with you. And now I have to watch what I say. I have to stop myself from calling you, from even _thinking_ about you because if I do, I start crying all over again." She glanced down at her belly, "And I've... I've never felt so alone. Kami, I need... I need to breath." Rin let out a haggard breath as she pushed open her door and walked out of the car. She held her hand over her mouth as she sunk onto the dark asphalt, urging herself to not cry. _You. I need you. _

Sesshomaru cursed as he closed his eyes, touching his wedding band on his hand. She was _crying, again, _because of him_. _That pain in his chest was returning, that guilt eating him from the inside. _He thought she would have taken his aloof disposition better. But what had he been expecting? For her to stop trying? For her to become complaisant, only meeting with him when necessary? _He sighed, _but he didn't want that. Because here he was, being selfish again. Hurting her again. _He stepped out of the car and walked towards her, the cool breeze running past his form.

"My mother knows nothing about our relationship." Sesshomaru spoke, his voice cool and confident. He stood in front of her much smaller figure, "I don't even know if you could classify our relationship as mother and son." He bent down, taking her hand to help her up. "Rin, listen to me," he murmured, forcibly forcing her chin up. "My mother left me when I was four. After that, the only contact we had when I was younger was forced from the pleadings of my father. As I got older, I made my way to New York to visit her. I was fresh out of school, determined to prove myself, and perhaps to her, that I would be successful. And I was. I was headhunted by a number of prominent businesses, and that's when I saw her again; at a business event for the company I was working for at the time. She was the date of the CFO, socializing with all the guests. But when she came to me, she looked at me like she didn't know who I was and left." His hand turned into a fist, his anger seeping into his amber eyes, "That made me more determined to be better. To be so _fucking_ high up on the corporate ladder that she couldn't ignore me anymore. Two years later I became a partner in the firm and that's when my mother became interested in me. _After_ I was, in her eyes, successful. So no, she doesn't know what I want in life, let alone my wife."

Rin's eyes settled on the collar of his shirt, "Sesshomaru..."

"Rin." He set his forehead against hers, no longer able to deny his want for her. He sighed, _but he had hurt her. She deserved better. _"Tell me this, would you be happier without me?" He asked, lifting his hand to stroke her cheek.

Rin closed her eyes, taking pleasure in the feel of his skin. "No." She licked her lips, sighing dreamily as she felt his lips upon her forehead. "Maybe, maybe I could be content with life." She thought fleetingly to New York, wondering if she would enjoy living there. "But I couldn't be happy." Her eyes lifted to meet his, "Never as happy as I was with you."

_So be it, _he thought. _She was his. _"I'm stubborn," he told her, his hand finding hers, "You know this better than anyone." His grip on her small waist tightened as Rin laced her fingers through his, "I need time." _I need you._ "But I will remember you."

Rin nodded slowly, hopelessly believing his words. Hopelessly believing in their happily ever after. "Ok." She wrapped her other hand around their intertwined hands and kissed his palm, "I love you," she whispered, watching as his cold demeanour crumbled down. His eyes were stormy, flecks of silver in a pool of gold. "Sesshomaru," she giggled, knowing that it'd be best to defuse the situation. "Does that mean you'll stop being an asshole now?"

He paused, her question unexpected. _But that was his Rin. Spontaneous, with her heart on her sleeve. _He chuckled, ducking his head to kiss the tip of her nose. "Yes. I apologize Rin, for being so horrible to you." He sighed as Rin began to play with his wedding band, "You deserve so much better."

"I already have the best," Rin smiled softly, leaning up to kiss his cheek, "Sesshomaru Takahashi. Voted Man of the Year. Ranked in the top ten CEO's under 40. The most handsome, most charming, most utterly adorable husband in the world." She leant her head on his chest and smiled, reflecting on their marriage, "Who else will sing me lullabies when I have trouble falling asleep?"

Sesshomaru raised his brow, "I don't sing."

"You just don't remember," Rin teased gently, "You sang to me once when I was pregnant." She licked her lips, _was, _she thought, her throat tightening, _was pregnant. _"I um..." she struggled to continue, "I couldn't fall asleep that night because I felt so sick and everything started to hurt, so you sang to me." Her gaze fell, "I don't know what it was, I was so delirious at that point, but I remember you said it was something your father used to sing to you when you were younger." Her brown eyes filled with tears as she remembered, her hold on him tightening, whispering now. "You're a sweet man Sesshomaru."

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p><em>Rin whimpered as she curled into a ball, rubbing her belly as she tried to sleep. The pain surrounded her body, shooting from her back, radiating to her sides, and her pelvis. "Mmph," she groaned, all she wanted to do was sleep. <em>

_"Rin," his voice cut through the night, husky with sleep, "Are you alright?"_

_Rin sniffed, wiping her eyes as she shifted over in the bed to face him. "I'm sorry," she whispered, not daring to look at him in the eye, "I'm sorry I woke you up." _

_"Rin," his gaze softened, moving up from her belly to her brown, doe-eyes. "Why aren't you sleeping?" He asked as hand lifted to stoke her damp hair from her cheeks._

_She looked down to her belly and felt her lips quiver, "It hurts Sesshomaru." She struggled to find words. "It hurts so much, everywhere. My back hurts, so I try to sleep on my side but then my side hurts. And I can't sleep on my belly because it feels like there's a jumping jelly bean inside. And I'm just so tired Sesshy, I'm so tired..." Tears were dropping from her eyes as she spoke, "I just want to sleep." _

_"Rin," he lifted his arm and brought her into his embrace, "Why didn't you tell me earlier?" He asked, rubbing circles against her back. _

_"I couldn't," she murmured, burying her head into his chest, "I know you have a meeting tomorrow at 7. I couldn't bother you with this," she gestured to herself, "This mess." _

_He chuckled, ducking his head and kissed her forehead, "My foolish wife. You should know that you come first." _

_She somehow found the energy to pout, "I feel like I should be offended by that comment," she murmured, enjoying the way his hand rubbed her back. _

_"Sleep," he told her, brushing his lips against hers. _

_"Ok," she whispered, how she loved being in his arms. There was just something about him that calmed her, that completed her. _

_"Tooku ni ite mo kimi ni todoku darou..." _

_Rin blinked wearily as she fell asleep. He was singing, she thought briefly, before her eyes closed, the pain from earlier just a brief memory. _

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>"I..." Sesshomaru's brows knitted together, <em>he didn't remember. Her words drew a blank; it was like it never happened. <em>

"It's ok," Rin murmured, reading his expression as she stroked his arm. "You can't force yourself to remember everything." She gave him a timid smile, "But I'll always be here to help, ok?"

He nodded, his mouth dry. _She always knew what to say. _"Promise me Rin," his eyes met hers, "That you won't give up on me." _On us. _

"Until death do us part," she grinned, "I'm not giving up on you." She kissed his hand, _just don't give up on us._ "I promise."

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru rubbed his neck at he stepped out of the car, looking up at the tall, stone home. The design was modern, with sleek black-framed windows. The front door was black, as were the garage doors. <em>This was their home. It looked familiar; that was a good sign, wasn't it? <em>

"Erm," Rin blushed as she looked at Sesshomaru, "Welcome home." She meekly walked towards him, sliding her hand through his, "Do you want to come in?"

He nodded, letting Rin lead him in. He watched as Rin set her shoes in the closet, following suit with his Italian loafers.

"Um, so... this is the living room," she gestured to the left, "It's almost done. The painting is complete, the furniture's all here, but I just need to spruce it up. Flowers, you know?" She grinned, taking Sesshomaru to the kitchen. "Here's where we _don't _cook," she giggled, "And this is the dining room," she gestured to the long, black table, "Where we don't eat. And," she took him up the stairs, pointing out the photos hung on the wall, "That's a photo of the first time we went on vacation. That's at one of your business events. Oh, that's the time we went to Paris! And this one's of you and Shippo at a baseball game. And then, that's our wedding," she paused to look at how happy they looked, "Um... yeah. So our bedroom is in this wing." She watched Sesshomaru as he walked into the bedroom, taking in the white fireplace, the large, king-sized bed, and the painting of them that hung over the fireplace. "What do you think?"

Sesshomaru's fingers trailed over the purple covers of the bed, "I enjoy it." He truly did, the decorating in the home was modern and sophisticated, yet it somehow had a warm, delicate charm.

Rin smiled, her body warming, "I'm glad you like it."

"Hn," he walked towards the painting, inspecting the initials of the artist. _ST. _He stiffened as shivers ran down his body. _Absurd, _he thought, chiding himself for being so foolish, _he didn't paint this. _

"It's beautiful, ne?" Rin stroked the canvas, "It's of our first dance."

He looked at her through the corner of his eyes, watching as her eyes misted with tears. "Very."

Rin gave him another moment before taking his hand, licking her lips as she struggled to compose herself. "I'll show you the rest?"

He nodded, "Lead the way."

He followed Rin past another door, "The nursery," she had murmured, so softly that he could barely hear her. "There's two more empty rooms in this wing." _Maybe one day, they'll be our children's._ "And then in the centre is your study." She pushed open the heavy doors and gestured for him to walk in. "I'll let you get reacquainted with everything." She bowed her head before Sesshomaru caught her arm, bringing her towards him.

He lifted Rin's chin, looking deep into her chocolate orbs. "Thank you," he murmured before he stole a quick kiss from her soft lips.

She blushed, her knees wobbling, "You're welcome," her reply was shaky, "I'll be in the kitchen making something to eat."

He nodded, watching as Rin slipped out of his study. He looked around the room, taking in the rich, modern aura. The right side of the wall was converted to a large bookcase, while the centre of the room held a large black desk. He sat in the leather seat, placing his hands on the desktop. He lifted the photo frame that stood on the edge, chuckling at the sight of Rin and Shippo wearing matching Mickey ears. He set the frame down and began to sift through the drawers, pausing as he found a sketchpad. He raised his brow as he flipped through the drawings, ranging from rooms to homes and buildings. _His designs, _he thought, _he had drawn these. _He was shocked as he found the sketch of their home. _He had designed this house? Kami, _he leant against the leather seat, _the last time he had drawn was during his undergraduate degree. He had dabbled in architecture, before deciding to concentrate fully on his business degree. _

"It was you," he murmured, glancing at the photo of Rin, "Wasn't it?" She had known he had taken classes in design, buying him a sketchbook for his birthday. A smirk donned his visage as the drawings of buildings and homes turned to images of Rin. _She was truly breathtaking. _

He finally set the book down and turned on the computer, going through his files for what seemed like hours. He was later interrupted by a call, his phone buzzing against his leg.

"Takahashi," he answered, pushing away from his desk. "Jaken. Hn, Rin is with me. Have her luggage brought to Minato-ku." He frowned as Jaken mentioned a business meeting he had completely forgotten about, "When?" He gave a reluctant sigh, _one hour, _he thought, _he had one more hour with Rin. _"Very well." He sat up from his seat, glancing out of the window to the grounds below. His assistant was still babbling about some more nonsense which he had began to tune out of. He began to walk around the room, smirking as he found a photo of Rin on his bookshelf. In the photo she was lying out on a beach, wearing nothing more than a yellow string bikini. _Their honeymoon. _He chuckled to himself as he toyed with the wooden frame. He remembered that moment, the third day of their 14 day honeymoon. She had only worn that bikini for an hour before it disappeared from her lovely form_._ "One more thing Jaken," he played with his wedding band, _she needed to know that he remembered_. "I need you to pick up some items for me."

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin sang along to the radio as she cooked, taking the second tray of freshly baked goods from the large oven. She pursed her lips as she lightly touched the first batch of cupcakes, finding them to be the perfect temperature. "Excellent!" She exclaimed, reaching for her decorating bag. She bent low and began the painstaking task of adding icing to the cupcakes, taking her time to create a perfect swirl on top of each one.<p>

"Rin?" Sesshomaru spoke her name as he stepped into the kitchen, the corners of his mouth lifting as he found Rin bent over the marble counter, her hair thrown in a messy bun, her pink apron covered in flour.

Rin perked up as she heard his voice, "Sesshomaru!" She set her decorating bag down and beamed, skipping forward to grab his arm and guide him to the counter. "I made some cupcakes, they're chocolate mochi." She handed him a finished dessert, "It's... um," _it was anyways,_ "Your favourite."

Sesshomaru raised his brow at the small brown cake, covered in white frosting. "My favourite," he peeled back the paper and took a bite, savoring the sweet taste. "It's delicious," he took another bite, soon finishing the small pastry. _The taste was familiar, almost intoxicating. It reminded him of the dozens of times he'd return home from a trip to the smell of these cupcakes._ "May I have another?"

Rin grinned, handing him another, "Of course!" She watched as he ate it, giggling as some frosting caught his chin. "You're still a messy eater," she teased, "Almost as bad as Shippo." She reached up with her index finger and wiped it off, daintily licking the residue with her tongue.

He watched with interest as she licked her finger, "Are you equally as seductive when you clean up my nephew," he retorted, his arms setting on the marble, trapping her between his tall form and the countertop.

"Are you jealous?" She asked, giggling as he leant down to nuzzle her neck. "Sesshomaru," she murmured, _this playful back and forth, it was like he was back. _She ran her hand down his back, "Would you like to stay for supper?" _Please say yes, _she thought, "Believe it or not, I can cook a mean soba." She laughed lightly, "I mean after thirty-or so failed attempts, I've finally perfected it."

He sighed, reluctantly pushing himself off, "I unfortunately cannot. I have a meeting to attend in an hour."

"Oh." Rin's smile fell, a shiver running over her form. "Well... that's ok," she turned around to grab the decorating bag. "I can pack up some cupcakes for you then. I have this cute little tupperware set that I've been meaning to use, so it'd be perfect for this and I..." She froze as Sesshomaru placed his hands on her hips and pressed a kiss to her bare shoulder. "I..." _Don't go, _she pleaded, _not yet. _

"I should go," he told her, "Jaken is arriving soon with your luggage, so send the cupcakes with him." He gently turned her around, taking her lips for a brief moment. "I expect a dozen or so to last me for the week."

Rin nodded, _a week, _she thought, s_he wouldn't see him for a week. _"Wait," she grabbed his hand, _fight for him. _"Will... will you go to dinner with me? I'm free in the evenings anytime this week and I'd just, but I mean, maybe if you don't want to that's ok. But I'd really like you to, and I could take you where you took me for out first date and I think it'd be really good for you. But unless you don't want to then..." She trailed off, her cheeks flaming red. _Kami Rin, like he really needs a speech. _

"Are you asking me out on a date?" He asked, stroking her porcelain cheek. He had watched as her cheeks became progressively rosier, amused that she still blushed so easily. _She was embarrassed to ask her husband to dinner, _he thought,_ he adored her. _

She nodded timidly, "Yes."

"Then I accept your proposal." He kissed her forehead, "I am free Wednesday after seven."

"Really?" Rin's eyes sparkled with joy, "You'll have dinner with me? That's great!" She bit her lip, fighting with herself to not scream out in excitement, "I'll pick you up at seven thirty then, at your place?"

He nodded, amused, "Seven thirty."

"Ok." She was feeling restless, "Ok," she repeated, suddenly giddy. "And make sure you wear something casual. No suits."

"I promise," he kissed her hand, his response automatic, "No suits, no ties, no phones."

Rin blinked, her heart skipping a beat. _No suits, no ties, no phones. That was the same phrase he would say to her when they went out on dates before the accident. _"Yeah," was all she could manage, before her inhibition disappeared and she buried herself in his embrace. She closed her eyes, "Sesshomaru, I'm so glad you said yes."

"As am I," he was reluctant to let her go but eventually they parted, Rin walking him out to his car. "Wednesday," he told her, kissing her once more before he left.

"Wednesday," she whispered, holding a hand to her lips. She sat on the front steps, watching as his silver coupe disappeared in the horizon. She laid her head on her knees, musing about what had happened that day. Though the day had started out rocky, it had ended on such a positive note. _They were going to go on a date, _she smiled from ear to ear, her heart beating rapidly at the mere thought. _She would take him to the botanical garden for a picnic like he had taken her on their first official date. _

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p><em>Rin peeked at Sesshomaru as they walked through the garden, the path lighted by small lanterns that hung from the trees. She wasn't touching him, yet her body was tingling with nerves. "Are you going to let me know where we're going?" She asked, a playful grin settling on her face.<em>

_He lifted his brows, "Patience is a virtue." _

_"Aw," Rin pouted, "Come on!" She grinned, twirling round to face him, "I promise not to tell anyone." _

_He chuckled, gently placing his hand on the small of her back. "You'll not have to wait much longer." He noticed Rin's cheeks flush red as he touched her form, enjoying how she blushed so easily. "It's through this door," he motioned to the tall french doors of the greenhouse they had walked up to, "After you." _

_Rin glanced up, "Thank you." She stepped into the greenhouse and felt her smile widen at the sight of a red-checkered cloth in the middle of the enclosed garden. She gasped in delight, "Are we having a picnic?" _

_"Indeed. Is it to your liking?"  
><em>

_"Yes," she whispered, "Very much so." She followed his suit and sat on the cloth, gently tucking her legs underneath her bum. She smiled bashfully as he rolled up the sleeves of his white sweater, revealing his incredibly toned forearms. "Um, thank you," she murmured, setting her hands on her lap, "For taking me out tonight." _

_He nodded, lifting a bottle of champagne from the woven bag, "Of course, but if anyone should be grateful, it should be me." He handed her a glass flute and filled it with the alcohol, "I rarely take time to enjoy the company of a beautiful woman such as yourself." _

_Beautiful, she thought, he thinks I'm beautiful. She shook her head playfully, "You're an incredibly charming man Sesshomaru." _

_"As are you," he took her hand, drawing circles on her soft skin with his thumb. "You've enchanted me Rin. There has yet to be a morning when I don't wake up from a dream about you." He watched as Rin averted her gaze, her pink tongue tracing her lips. "You're eyes are haunting," he told her, "Your lips look so soft. I often find myself wondering what you would taste like." _

_She giggled, scooting closer to his form, "Does that line always work for you?" _

_He smirked, "I'm not sure," he cupped her cheek, bringing her head closer to his, "Let's try it, shall we?" _

_Rin's eyes widened, "Lets," she replied, her words taken away as his lips descended upon hers. __That night, the food in the basket was forgotten, the champagne emptied as they laughed and flirted. Sesshomaru stole quick kisses as they talked, Rin coyly hiding her rosy cheeks. Rin was amazed by how easy it was, how their conversation remained light and playful, how he himself, someone who seemed so reserved and stoic, could be so lighthearted and humorous. Somehow, that night, they had ended up lying on the picnic blanket, looking up at the stars. He had his arm wrapped around her, her head resting on his shoulder, her body tucked up against his. Perhaps it was the alcohol, his warm form, the midnight hour, or the way she felt so absolutely comfortable in his arms, but s_he had told him that she felt like she was dreaming. That she never wanted to wake up, if it meant that he would not be there. He had responded with a warm chuckle, his own words soothing her to sleep. "I will always be by your side," he had murmured, "If you will have me." __

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin's eyes moistened at the memory, <em>yes, <em>she thought, wiping her eyes. _He really was sweet. _She lifted her head, her gaze following the cars that whizzed past the house. _She could only pray that their upcoming date could be equally as perfect._

Rin laughed, shaking her head. _She really was being overly emotional recently. Perhaps it was the combination of lack of sleep, hormones, and heartache that were toying with her body. _"It'll get better," she told herself, quickly adding a caveat, "Hopefully." She smiled as she spotted a familiar black limo drive into the driveway, standing up to wave them in.

"Ms. Rin!" Jaken greeted her as he tumbled out of the long vehicle. He eagerly ran to the back of the limo, "I have your luggage!"

"Hello Jaken," Rin skipped towards him, thanking the driver as he handed her the polka-dotted bags, "Thank you for bringing them to me."

"Of course, of course," he beamed, thrusting another bag into her hands. "One more thing Ms. Rin, this if for you, from Sesshomaru-sama." He watched eagerly as Rin searched through the tissue paper, pulling out a purple braided dog collar and a bag of marshmallows. "Do you like it Ms. Rin?" He asked, ecstatic because it seemed like his boss was returning to his former self. "He requested that I pick them up before I came here." _  
><em>

Rin stood momentarily in shock before she laughed, wiping the tears from her eyes, "Yes. A million times yes." She bent down and hugged the older gentleman, "Thank you so much Jaken," she thanked him sincerely, kissing the man's pale green cheeks.

_He remembers, _she thought, following Jaken into her home. He set her luggage in the front corridor before he left with two large boxes of cupcakes for himself and Sesshomaru. After unpacking, Rin sat on the king-sized bed and opened the bag of marshmallows. She inhaled the sweet scent and grinned, plopping one into her mouth.

_He remembers me._

* * *

><p>xoxo<p>

tuille


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

by

tuille

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><p>disclaimer: anything you recognize, i do not own.<p>

* * *

><p>"So today's the day, huh?" Ayame walked through the greenhouse located in the back of their shop, the sounds of Tokyo's top 40 hits pulsing through the glass room. She looked around the rows of pot and found Rin on her knees, tending to a patch of flowers.<p>

"Mmhmm," Rin replied absentmindedly, tucking her hair behind her ear. She watered the row of flowers, "I'm excited. You know, maybe we should look into getting self-watering planters? The woman who was here earlier told me all about it, sounds interesting..."

"Rin," Ayame sighed as she interrupted, airing her worries, "Are you sure that you want to do this tonight?"

Rin blinked, her shoulders falling, "Ayame." She set the small shovel onto the ground next to her, shooting her a smile, "It's just a picnic."

Ayame kneeled next to her friend, picking a yellow leaf from a plant. "You and I both know that it's more than just a picnic."

Rin giggled, "Ayame, stop playing mom. I'm a grown up, I'll be ok." She turned to her friend and pouted, "I'll be ok," she repeated. She sighed at her friend's stern expression, playing with the leaves of the flowers she was cutting, "I have to try Ayame," she murmured softly.

_For the sake of our marriage. I have to know if what we had was real. _

The redhead fell silent for a moment, contemplating her next sentence. "But what if he hurts you again?" She asked softly, remembering how heart broken Rin had been.

Rin took her friends hand and grinned mischievously, "Then I'll let you beat him up, _again_."

Ayame laughed, remembering how she had slapped him that one time. "Oh god," she rubbed her face, her cheeks turning red, "You know I was just mad, right? And it was for you."

"I know," Rin smiled gratefully, "Thank you."

Ayame threw her hands around Rin's thin shoulders, "You're welcome. Rin, I really hope it does work out tonight and that he suddenly remembers everything and it'll be like nothing happened." She smiled as she pulled back, "And you'll be back to normal, arriving late to work because of a morning quickie with your husband turned into an hour long session." She laughed as Rin blanched, "But... I'll tell you what, I'll start to practice my moves just in case."

"Ok," Rin giggled as she shifted up onto her feet. "To tell you the truth... I'm kind of nervous for tonight."

Ayame cocked her head, "Why?"

"I'm worried that this might not work." She cast her gaze to the cement floor, "That no matter how hard I'll try, he won't remember everything. I'm scared that... that I'll fall _out_ of love with him." She added finally, letting out a shaky breath. "I'm scared that he'll be too different, and that it won't be the same. Because..." she sniffed, hyperaware of her emotions, "W-what if he stops holding my hand when I get nervous, or he stops telling me that he misses me? Or what if he isn't a cuddly teddybear anymore?" She laughed bitterly at the tears appearing in her eyes, "I'm just scared that even if I try, it won't be the same. And I'll get hurt." Her eyes filled with tears, "I don't want my heart to break again Ayame."

"Oh Rin," Ayame pulled her friend in for another hug, "I know he's a little lost right now, but that doesn't mean he's not the man you fell in love with." _Even if he's an asshat, _she added mentally, _for breaking your heart._

"I know. I keep telling myself that. I keep trying to think positively, but it's hard." Rin looked at the ring on her finger, the diamond catching the sunlight. "I just want him back." She then straightened her shoulders, "I just have to believe that it's going to be ok," she murmured, "At least I hope so."

"That's the spirit," Ayame beamed, "It'll all work out. Now come on, we've got a wedding reception to beautify." She led Rin to the front of the shop where Jakotsu was taping up boxes of floral arrangements.

"Finally," Jakotsu lamented, dramatically wiping his brow with the sleeves of his pink shirt. "Women," he rolled his eyes playfully, "Leaving men to do all the dirty work."

Rin laughed, ruffling his hair as she bent down to pick up a box, "As if! You're more feminine than us Jak."

He smirked, dusting off his shoulders, "Don't be jelling girl, just because I have better hair than you."

Rin shook her head, "Yeah, yeah." She leant down to pick up a box, "Is this for the reception?" She asked, peaking in to see the large rose arrangement. "Oh, Jak, it's gorgeous! I love that you mixed in the buds too, gosh, I'm in love! Great job!"

"You know it," Jakotsu hefted a box onto his shoulder and held open the door for the girls, "There's a reason they call me the King of Flowers." He grinned, wiggling his eyebrows. "Apres vous," he bowed, gesturing his arm to the van parked outside the shop.

Rin giggled, "Thank you," she walked with Ayame to the van, setting her box down to help Ayame open the back of the white van.

"So," Ayame began as she helped Rin put in the boxes of flowers, "What are you planning on wearing tonight?"

"Oh," Rin shrugged, "Would it be too cheesy to wear what I wore the first time?"

"Not at all," Ayame jumped in the van and tugged the boxes further into the trunk. "Now, how about under the dress?" She wiggled her eyebrows, "Some lingerie?"

Rin flushed red, playing with the edges of the trunk doors, "Wh-what? Why?"

"Rin," Ayame gave her a dry look, "You guys were freaking sex addicts. You basically did it every single day. No scratch that, probably twice a day! You're probably... nope, _definitely_ going to have sex tonight."

Rin shook her head, laughing, "Sex on the first date Ayame?"

"Hey," Ayame held a hand to her heart, "As much as he's on my bad side right now, I have to admit that your man is really, really good looking. And I'm pretty sure you've told me like a million times how great he is in bed too. Not knocking you guys or anything, Kouga's a horny bastard too."

"Oh my god," Rin placed her hands on her ears, "I didn't want to know that!"

"Mmhmm," Ayame strode out and jumped off onto the pavement, "Let's just say that you're not the only one having sex on the 40th floor."

"Ew! That's like hearing that your parents still have sex!" Rin ran back into the flower shop, laughing as she ran into Jakotsu. Ayame leant against the van and smiled as she watched Rin and Jak playfully banter with one another.

_She's back, _she thought, glancing up at the Tokyo skyline where a certain building caught her eyes. _The bubbly young woman who she considered to be her sister was back. _She closed her eyes and prayed, _don't hurt her, _she pleaded,_ no matter what happens tonight, don't hurt her again. _

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin shivered as she stepped out of the bathroom, tiptoeing into her closet as she moved over the white carpet. <em>This is it, <em>she thought, brushing her wet hair up into a messy bun. The doors to the walk in closet were open, the air in the room cool from the AC.

"Time to get ready," she sang, taking a seat in front of her built in vanity. She plucked out her eyeliner and mascara from one of the side drawers, making a face as she applied the products. She then brushed a hint of blush onto the apple of her cheeks and put a thin coat of lip gloss onto her lips. She sat back and inspected herself in the mirror. She sighed as she looked at herself, her confidence faltering.

_Her eyes were too large, her lips too small. _

_Why had he fallen for her? _Her gaze fell to the make-up, _if he did at all. He could have anyone. And he wanted her? _She felt her eyes water, those mocking voices taunting her.

_Uneducated. _

_Classless. _

_That pathetic little girl playing dress up. _

Her fingers tightened on the lip gloss, _the naive little schoolgirl. _

She knew her thoughts were foolish, her self-doubt detrimental to her confidence, but that one part of her mind could not be ignored. Not when she felt like this. _Not when her heart was still so fragile. _

She shivered as she felt a cool hand on her shoulder. She looked into the mirror and froze at the sight of that ghostly elderly woman.

"Akemi," she whispered, setting the make up down onto the vanity.

"Rin," she nodded her head, greeting the younger girl. "You still don't think he loved you?" She asked, her voice calm.

Rin bowed her head, struggling to answer. Her body was shaking, her thin shoulders shuddering from the cool touch. "He never told me," she whispered harshly, "And if he did, I don't know why he would." She sniffed, tracing hearts onto the white leather seat. "Sometimes I forget that I'm not good enough for him. That people don't talk about how unmatched we are." She laughed at her foolishness, cursing herself for falling in love with a man like him. "I used to think that he was my fairytale come true, just like the stories I would read in the orphanage. The Prince Charming who woos his princess and spends the rest of his life fighting her dragons and bringing her flowers." She let out a deep breath, "And he was." She bit her lip, struggling not to cry. "But I feel like I don't deserve him. He could do so much better."

"Better than the woman he loves?" Akemi moved towards her, "While the Prince may have fought her dragons, the princess tended his wounds, warmed his heart. _Loved_ him." She brushed her hand through Rin's hair, "He knew how much you loved him Rin. I promise you this, that you're love was not one-sided."

"Then why did he never tell me?"

Akemi smiled, "Perhaps you weren't listening." She touched Rin's engagement ring that was lying on the table, "You are loved my dear, do not think for one foolish moment that you are not. His heart was yours, _still_ is yours, but this time," her image in the mirror faded, "It is the princess who must slay the dragons."

Rin's eyes were still moist as Akemi left, _slay the dragons? _

She closed her eyes, _come on Rin, _she talked to herself, _you can do this. _Her hand reached for her engagement ring, sliding it back onto her finger.

_Your love was not one-sided. _

She smiled hopefully, her mind running to those moments when he had asked her to marry him to the night they were married.

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p><em>Rin blushed as their gaze met, her bare feet curling into the plush, white carpet. He looked so dashing in his three-piece suit. She giggled as she walked towards him, her hands reaching forward to play with his bow tie. "I can't believe you're wearing this," she murmured, tugging it off with a simple pull. <em>

_He raised his eyebrow, "You don't like it?" He asked, stroking her sides with his large hands. "I thought you told the wedding planner, if I remember correctly, that 'you would just die' if I wore it." _

_She laughed, laying her head against his chest. "But you said they looked foolish." _

_He smirked, "On other men. I wear them rather well, don't I?" He asked, puffing out his chest. _

_She burst out into laughter, throwing her arms carelessly over his shoulders as she bounced up to kiss his lips. "Thank you," she murmured, "For wearing it."_

_He lifted her hand and pressed a firm kiss onto it, "Anything for you," he replied, "Wife." _

_She grinned, "Husband." She would never get tired of calling him that. Her husband. Sesshomaru Takahashi. It was like a dream. "You always do that," she whispered, watching as his thumb played with the diamond._

_"Do what?" _

_"Kiss my ring finger," she smiled, "It's really sweet." _

_He raised his brow, his amber eyes glittering playfully. "I can kiss other parts of your body, if you would prefer." _

_She shook her head, her lips tugging into a wide grin, "Our luggage still isn't here. You don't want to scare that poor butler, do you?" _

_"I rather think he'd like the show." _

_She lightly slapped his shoulder, "Gosh, you're horny!" _

_He growled, wrapping his arm around her small waist to pull her close. He held her close to his pelvis, smirking as her eyes widened. "I can assure you, wife," he purred, pressing his lips to her pulse, "That the moment those bags are placed into the room I will throw you onto that bed and ravish you." _

_Rin gulped, blushing furiously as she felt him harden. "Oh," she peaked over her shoulders as the doors to the bedroom opened and the elderly gentleman waddled in with their bags. _

_"Your luggage," he announced, not noticing the couple who stood impossible close together standing in front of him. "I've refilled the pantries, toiletries, towels and closets with what you requested. I shall be taking my leave and return in eight days." _

_Sesshomaru cleared his throat, giving Rin a stern look, "Hn. Until then, thank you." _

_The man bowed and shuffled back out, the doors clicking together when he left. _

_"So..." she squealed as he scooped her up and placed her onto the bed. "I'm ready to be ravished," she teased, her nimble fingers beginning to unbutton his shirt._

_"You will not be leaving this bed," he told her, his hand finding his way under her white dress and onto the smooth, milky skin of her thighs. "For days." _

_"Oh," she sighed lustfully as his fingers touched her, her mind in a daze, "Ok." _

_He chuckled, linking their free hands together. He placed another kiss on her rings, his gaze finding hers. _

_Aishiteru._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin glanced at the time on her cellphone, her heart beating wildly. <em>Only forty minutes, <em>she thought, reaching for that ivory chiffon dress she had worn on their first date. Her smile widened as she touched the soft fabric, her mind filling with images of champagne and flowers. _That night had been perfect. Probably impossible to match._

"Wish me luck," she murmured, setting the dress on the glass table in the middle of her closet.

She then let out a deep breath, walking towards the shopping bag that held her brand new undergarments. She blushed as she remembered how Ayame had dragged her to the nearby lingerie store to pick out some items for tonight. Because they only had a short time period, Ayame had simply tossed three things onto the counter, paid for them and handed the bag to Rin. It was now up to her to choose which to wear for her date tonight.

_Sex on the first date. _

She paled, looking at herself now in the full length mirror. She felt queasy, her hands clammy, her nerves tingling. "You can do this," she told herself. It was not like this was the first time she had worn lingerie for him. On their wedding night she had worn a baby blue garter belt with a matching lacy bra. He had loved it, her cheeks flushing red as she remembered his heated gaze.

"It's just lingerie," she murmured as she warily pulled out the first piece. In her hand was a black lace bustier, with a matching thong. She played with the mesh fabric, holding it up to her body.

"Oh my god Ayame," she glanced up at the ceiling, "Why do I even have this?" She asked, looking once again through the bag. She then pulled out a red garter slip, her cheeks now flaming at the racy garment. Quickly she stuffed that back in and pulled out the last piece. It was a lace flyaway babydoll, which had a slit extending from the bra. The ivory fabric was soft, with matching silk panties, also made of lace.

"This is really nice," she spoke, appreciating the fine craftsmanship. She laid her towel onto the velvet settee and unhooked the lingerie from the hangers. She pulled on the panties first and then the babydoll, inspecting herself as she moved towards the full length mirror. She bit her lip as she pictured Sesshomaru, wondering if he would like it. She had never worn lingerie like this before.

"Ok Rin," she tried to talk herself up, "This is just a date. With your husband. No big deal. You've done this so many times before."

"Just a date," she stepped into her ivory dress and then a pair of brown leather flats. She looked at herself in the mirror. "This is just a date."

_Slay the dragons, _she told herself, laughing nervously as she tugged on her dress. She glanced down at her rings, _I can do this._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin chewed her lip nervously as she pulled into the underground parking lot, driving her small red mini cooper next to <em>his <em>sleek Mercedes. _It's just a picnic, _she repeated, taking her keys out of the ignition. _It's not a big deal._

_But what if it goes wrong? _One side of her mind argued, _what if this goes horribly? What if he's back to being cold? What if she no longer interests him. What if... _

"No. You can do this," she shook herself of her negative thoughts.

_Because what if this goes right. _

She slipped out of the car and shut the door, her hands shaking as she pressed for the elevator. She punched in the code to the penthouse without a second thought. _Just like she used to, _she mused, standing with her legs crossed and her hands clutching a brown leather satchel. She glanced up at the black window on the top of the elevator, watching as she slowly reached the top floor. With a ding the silver doors opened, revealing a pair of tall black doors. She stepped out of the elevator, her heels making a soft noise as she walked on the marble floor. Once she reached the entrance she lifted her hand to knock before she stopped herself, _she had a key. _

She pulled out her keys from her bag and starred at the silver key. _Should she use it? _She glanced at her watch, _it was 7. He should be expecting her. _She looked at the doors and swallowed, _but this condo wasn't _**_theirs_**_ anymore. She couldn't just open the door, could she?_

"Rin?"

Startled, Rin stumbled back, dropping her set of keys onto the floor. She looked to the door where Sesshomaru stood, wearing a pair of dark slacks and a black sweater. He was leaning against the doorframe, an amused smirk donning his face.

"Having trouble?" He asked, reaching down for the set of keys.

"Oh, uh," she stuttered, _so much for a great first impression._ "Sesshomaru," she blushed, smoothing down the front of her dress. "How did you know I was out here?"

"There's a camera," he pointed to the small black bulb hanging in the corner.

"Oh," she thanked him as he handed her keys, "Right. Um, you look great," her eyes ran over his tall form, gulping at their sheer closeness. "Really great," she blushed as he lifted her chin, _just like he used to. _

"As do you. You look beautiful," his eyes were molten as he looked into hers. "I've been waiting for this night."

"You have?" She smiled, "Me too." _The flowers._ "Um, hold on," she glanced down, "I have something for you." She reached into her purse and pulled out a small bouquet of elegant callas, "Here," she blushed, suddenly shy as she handed them to him, "These are for you."

Sesshomaru chuckled as he took the flowers. _Flowers, _he thought, _she brought him flowers. _"Thank you." He leant down to smell the bouquet; her scent had somehow mingled with the bouquet. "Come in," he stepped back, "I have a quick phone call to make before we leave."

"Ok," Rin followed him into the penthouse, her eyes wandering over the familiar abode. _It's so empty, _she thought, her smile faltering. She watched as he set the flowers on the table. "Um, I'll put them in water for you, while you make your call." She told him, unwrapping the flowers.

He nodded, "Very well, it'll be quick." His long legs brought him quickly up the stairs to his office.

Rin let out a deep breath when he left, her body still tense. _It's still awkward, _she thought as she moved towards the tall kitchen cabinets in search for a vase. "Nothing," she murmured, frowning as she had pulled out a long glass flute. _He didn't even have any food in the cabinets. _She stepped towards the appliances and opened the fridge, her lips pursing at the lack of food.

"What have you been eating?" She asked herself, closing the fridge as she began to walk around the penthouse.

She began in the living room, taking in the bare walls, empty coffee table and shelves. She swept her fingers across the black shelf she had installed the day she had moved in, her heart clenching. _There used to be photos here, _she remembered, amassed throughout their entire relationship. She had brought only a small box of photos to their new home in Minato-ku, _so where were the rest? _

She moved to the balcony doors, pushing the white curtains to the side. The large vases that held tall, wild flowers were empty, the white chairs that used to be by the doors also gone. _It was like every trace of her presence had been erased from the penthouse. _She shivered, turning back to face the empty room.

_It was like she was never here._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p><em>Rin grinned nervously at Sesshomaru as he helped her unpack. "I'm beginning to think I overpacked," she laughed, opening yet another large cardboard box.<em>

_"Hn, your apartment was apparently much larger than I presume." He lifted yet another vase from the box and set it on the table next to him. "I believe this is the ninth vase?"_

_Rin glanced up and smiled, "You can never have enough vases!" She exclaimed, bouncing up from her spot to kiss the top of his head and take the vase from his hands. "This one would look great in your bedroom." She held it to the light, inspecting the tall crystal cylinder._

_"I believe you mean our bedroom," he murmured into her ear, his arm wrapping around her small waist._

_Rin blushed, leaning back into his arms, "Our..." she grinned, tilting her head back to kiss his cheek, "I like that. We have our own bedroom now." _

_"Hn," he pushed back her hair to kiss her neck, "How many more vases are there?" _

_"Um," Rin thought back, "Six?" She giggled as he sighed, "And that's not including the flower pots I have too." _

_"I see," he turned her to face him, "So you're turning this apartment into a garden." _

_"Yes," she replied without hesitation. "Also, I want to get some really cute pillows for the couch. And add some photos," she twirled out of his embrace and danced around the living room, "I brought a throw for the couch from my apartment, and I think we need to get a better coffee table." She scrunched up her nose, "Yours is too small. We can also get some cute sculptures and lamps, I'm thinking stainless steel? I have the cutest set of teacups to add to the kitchen, and oh, a set of napkins with cupcakes on them. Also, I brought some paintings I found at the flea market to put up. And then our bedroom!" She clapped her hands, "While your bed sheets are amazingly soft, they're not very warm. So I was thinking of getting a down comforter, and oh, curtains! You don't have any actually, now that I think about it." She turned to face him, "What do you think?"_

_He shook his head, thoroughly amused, "Do as you wish," he told her, looking around his apartment now with a more critical eye. He had never noticed how bare it looked compared to her small apartment. While he had the essentials such as a furniture and appliances, he lacked those small details. "I feel..." he chose his words carefully, "Apprehensive to finish unpacking your things." _

_Rin giggled, "Don't worry," she walked over to him and tucked her arm into his, "All that's left are my clothes, art supplies, flowers, shoes, oh and plates and bowls. But that's it," she grinned as she looked up at his weary eyes, "Promise." _

_"You're going to make me a poor and tired man, aren't you?" He teased, placing a kiss on her forehead._

_Rin moaned happily, "Only cause you love me," she replied, wrapping her arms around his lean torso. "Thank you for telling me that I had to move in." _

_He chuckled, "It was more of an order than a question, wasn't it?" _

_"Rin, move in with me," she mimicked, "You didn't even let me say yes!" She laughed as he spun her around and dipped her low, "But all the same, I'm glad I'm here."_

_"As am I," he told her, bringing her up to kiss her lips. _

_"I love you Maru," she told him, her voice soft, her eyes dreamy, "Forever." _

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>"You look pensive," Sesshomaru's voice brought her from reverie, her small body turning to face him.<p>

"Oh," she gave him a soft smile, "I didn't hear you."

"Hn, the phone call didn't take long." He leaned against the white walls, his eyes narrowing at the tight smile on her face. "You're oddly quiet," he noted, tucking his hands into his pockets.

"I'm just... thinking." She shivered as a cold breeze ran over her form, "We lived here together for almost a year, you know?" She rubbed her arms, "It's just weird, being back here." She glanced around the empty room. The vases, magazines, frames, knick knacks and pillows that once littered the room were gone. "I... this is where I realized that I wanted to marry you." She bit the inside of her cheek, mulling over the past. She let out a little laugh, "That night, I had just come home from the flowershop, stressing out over our first really big event. So when I came home, all the lights were off and I thought you weren't home." She shrugged, "For some reason I just started to cry," she wiped her eyes, "Pathetic, right? I guess I just really wanted a hug," her voice cracked as she remembered, struggling to contain her emotions.

"Kami," she sniffed, "And then I went upstairs to our bedroom and found a note on the door to go up onto the roof. So I go up and find a gorgeous cabana that I didn't know existed. And there you are, wearing one of your many black suits, looking gorgeous and my heart just melts. For the rest of the night we cuddled and ate chocolate, and it was amazing." She shivered, "You made me completely forget about everything else, and for just a little while, the world was just you and me. It was like something out of a movie. And I knew that I had fallen in love with you, so hard and so fast, and I realized that I didn't want this to stop. I didn't want to ever stop waking up next to you. I didn't want to stop making you coffee in the morning, or kiss you goodbye. I realized that night, as we were lying on that white couch, looking at the stars, that I wanted to be with you forever." She let out a deep breath, "That I wanted more than anything, to be your wife." She gave him a bitter smile, "Cheesy, huh?"

He said nothing, his face expressionless as he fought to remember that moment. "I don't..." his memories were unclear, as if the past three years were veiled behind a deep fog.

"It's ok," she interrupted him as she took his hand, "It wasn't anything big. Just... just a random day." Her voice cracked, filled with pain, but she fought to mask it.

_He doesn't remember. _

"I mean," she licked her lips, chastising herself for being so emotional over a single moment.

_Don't be so foolish Rin. _

"I don't even remember what I did last Monday," she smiled, her fingers lacing through his. She lifted her other hand to stroke his pale visage, her fingers moving over his angled cheekbones. "It's ok," she told him once more, "Because we can make more memories together."

"Hn." He bent down and kissed her forehead, "Are you always so optimistic?" He asked, closing his eyes as she wrapped her arms around him.

"Of course," she smiled, "One of us has to be." She stepped out of his embrace and took his hand, "Come on," she smiled brightly, masking the pain she felt in her heart, "We have a date to get to."

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin giggled at the look on Sesshomaru's face as they walked into the greenhouse, his eyebrows lifting as he took in the lights and decorations. "What do you think?" She asked, priding herself in her decorating skills. In the centre of the glass building was a white table with glass plates and champagne. The centerpiece of the table was a bouquet of forget me nots and white lilies. Next to the table was a set of cushions and pillows, with a small basket filled with baked treats lying to the side.<p>

"Perfection," Sesshomaru wrapped his arm around her waist and leaned down to kiss her.

Rin grinned, "I'm glad you like it," she laid her hand on his warm chest, shivering as he smiled back. "Hungry?" She took his hand and led him to the table, pulling out his chair.

He raised his brow and sat down, "Thank you," he murmured, chuckling as Rin set a napkin on his lap.

"Of course monsieur," she bowed down to kiss his cheek, "And welcome to Chef Rin's." She threw a white napkin over her bended arm, "The first course tonight will be stuffed mushrooms," she walked to the white cart that had been tucked next to the flowers, bringing out a large blue plate with a silver cover. "And don't worry," she giggled as she set it down in front of him, "This is all catered."

Sesshomaru nodded, lifting the cover off of the plate. "Join me," he gestured to the seat next to him, "Won't you?"

"Of course," Rin slid into the seat next to him, thanking Sesshomaru as she poured her a glass of champagne. She bit her lips as their eyes met, the fairy lights and candles bringing out a warm brightness in his gaze. _He's so handsome,_ she thought, picking up a mushroom and brought it to her mouth. She moaned in delight as she ate it, "This is really good," she told him when she finished. She noticed his empty plate and frowned, "You're not eating?"

He looked inquisitively at her, "You wore that dress the first time we were here."

Rin blinked, nodding her head. _He remembers?_ "Hai." She reached over to take his hand, "What else do you remember?" She asked, her voice dulcet, _hopeful_.

He chuckled low, running his thumb over the arch in her hand, "You choked on the dessert."

Rin's cheeks flamed red, "Oh," she glanced down at her plate, "You remember that?" Out of all the memories, he remembered her choking on a nut. She laughed and held a hand to her face,"Anything else?"

The corners of his lips quirked, "You looked beautiful. And..." he tugged on her hand, pulling her gently until she sat in his lap. "Utterly irresistible. I found it difficult to do nothing else but kiss you." He took her chin and tilted it down, covering her peach-stained lips with his.

Rin's toes curled at his touch, delighted to feel his kiss once more. _It's just like that night. This fuzzy feeling in her head, the rapid beating of her heart, the butterflies in her belly._ Her fingers reached forward to clutch his shirt, scrunching the cotton in her hold. _She could kiss him forever. _

Rin smiled when she pulled back, her delicate fingers running over his cheek. "Do you remember the cheesy pick up line you used?" She asked, "About how soft my lips looked?"

He smirked, "However cheesy it was, it worked," he commented, lifting his hand to play with her hair. "I also remember firing Jaken three times that day."

Rin giggled, "Why?"

"You made me nervous," he kissed her forehead, "I was agitated the entire day."

Rin shifted forward and laid her head against his shoulder, her hands finding his. "How... how about our wedding?" She asked finally, "Or our engagement?"

His eyes flickered to hers, noting how bright and hopeful her brown eyes looked. But he couldn't lie. Not to her. "Not fully," he answered slowly, "I remember fragments." His hand brushed over her back, "Your dress. The ring." He glanced at her, her eyes clouding with tears, "It's like having a snapshot of each event."

Rin nodded her head, "Oh," she let out a deep breath,_ don't be foolish Rin_, she reminded herself. She shouldn't have expected this one night to trigger all his memories. Just because he remembered this one night didn't mean that he'd miraculously recover his memory.

"Um," she fidgeted with her fingers, her mood shifting. She struggled not to be upset, "There's filet mignon for the entree," she stood up from his lap and brushed her dress out, "I'll go get it. You'll love it, it's so yummy. When I went to get them for tonight I almost ate them all and..."

"Rin," he called out her name, taking her hand before she walked away. "I don't remember the sequence of events, or specific days, but I remember how I felt. How I _still_ feel about you." He offered her a lazy smile, one that so rarely graced his face before he had met her. "It's impossible to go about my day without once thinking about you. You haunt my thoughts, my dreams." He kissed her rings, running his fingers over her smooth skin.

Her breath hitched as he did_, just like he used to._

"I think of you every moment of my life." He had finally surrendered himself to those times, those emotions. "I remember how I felt on the day I asked you to marry me. I was impossibly happy, eager to have my ring on your hand, to have you as mine. And then our wedding day, I remember feeling excited, nervous." His hands cupped her cheeks as he stood up from his chair, "You're the only woman who makes me nervous, who makes me second guess myself." He leant down to kiss her forehead, "Who makes me a better man."

Rin felt herself melt as he spoke, launching towards him as she wrapped her arms around his neck. "I love you," she whispered, "I love you so much."

He exhaled at her declarations, holding her tighter. "I know," his hand stroked the small of her back.

_Aishiteru. _

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru looked at Rin as she pulled into the garage, her hands visibly shaking as she turned off the ignition.<p>

"So," she blushed, her brown eyes darting from the concrete wall of the underground parking lot to him. "This is it, huh?"

"Hn," he nodded, his gaze moving to the elevator. "The end," he added quietly, not quite believing it himself.

This night they had shared together had only further confirmed his feelings for her. The way she made him feel so alive with just a simple smile was astounding.

"I... um," she cleared her throat, fidgeting with the steering wheel, "I guess I'll see you Friday then? To pick up the puppy?"

He nodded again, "Friday." _Two more lonely nights without Rin until then. _"My day ends at three," he looked back at her, "If you would like to meet me at the office?"

She smiled, her nerves calming, "I'd love to. I'll even bring the dog collar you got for me." She grinned now, "I don't think I ever thanked you for your gift."

"No need," he stalled for time, not wishing to leave her side. "Are you happy to get a pet?"

She licked her lips, "Yeah, I'm excited to get a puppy. We've... well," she laughed, "I've always wanted a puppy. I always thought that my perfect family would have a husband, a dog and about half a dozen kids." She grinned, "That's what I wished for anyways, when I was younger. So yes, long story short," she shot him a goofy grin, "I'm very excited to get a puppy."

"Indeed, a puppy." He released the seatbelt from its hold and sighed, "Rin..."_ Not yet_, he thought, he wasn't ready to let her go. Not after all they had been through to get to this very night.

"Yes?" She looked up at him, her eyes so bright.

_She was simply irresistible. _

_Something._ He told himself, _think of something._ "Would..." he struggled for ideas, "Would you like to join me for coffee?"

Rin broke out into a grin, nodding her head, "I'd love to," she replied, removing her seatbelt just in time for Sesshomaru to have exited the car and open the driver door. "Thank you," she murmured, locking the doors and setting her keys in her bag.

"Of course," his deep, smooth voice sent shivers up her spine. He took her hand and silently they walked to the elevator. She watched as Sesshomaru punched in the code with his free hand,_ maybe he doesn't want this night to end too. _

His arm then wrapped around her waist and pulled her into his embrace. He buried his face in her hair, inhaling her floral scent. _Kami, this smell. This sweet fragrance that was uniquely hers. For so long he had craved this. Holding her. Just like this. _"I've missed you," he murmured, his voice husky. He tightened his hold on her, thinking foolishly that she would disappear if he let go. "It feels like I'm in a daze, when I'm without you." The past two days had been hell, dreaming of her, thinking of her every waking moment, but not seeing her, not being able to physically touch her had been horrible. _He ached for her. _

_He hadn't known what missing someone was like until her. _

Rin shivered, _he missed me._ "I missed you too," she smiled, her eyes tearing as she looking up at him. She leaned up onto her toes and kissed his lips, "So much. I was so worried that tonight would be horrible, but it's not." She ran her hand over the fuzz growing on his head, giggling at the feeling. "Today was so perfect."

He closed his eyes, bringing her small form into his embrace, "Rin, stay with me tonight," he requested. _He needed her. Being with Rin, his thoughts were calm, his body relaxed. He was content, just being by her side. _

Rin stilled, her breath hitching, _stay with him._ "Sessh," she laid her head against his chest, her own heart beating like the hooves thousand stallions. "Ok."

_Ok._

Relief flooded through him when she spoke, his lips finding hers for a quick passionate kiss. _Finally. _He glanced up as the doors to the elevator dinged, walking towards the doors to the penthouse with Rin in his arms. He pulled out his keys and opened the doors, motioning for Rin to enter first. "Ladies first," he purred, twirling Rin as she walked past him.

Rin giggled, kicking off her flats by the door. "So..." she spun to face him, watching as he set his keys on the kitchen island.

"So," he repeated, his eyes playful. He took her hand, "Would you like a tour of my humble abode?"

Rin nodded, "Ok," she looked up at him. "Is this another one of your cheesy lines where you give me a tour of your bedroom?" She asked, teasing him gently.

He smirked, "Yes," he replied, unabashed. "It'll take less than five minutes," he promised. He pointed to the marble counters, "This is the kitchen," then they walked past the large leather couch, "The living room," then up the stairs past the first door, "The guest room." The second door, "My office," their walking slowed, Sesshomaru noting how Rin's hold on his hand tightened. He stroked her hand softly, hoping to calm her nerves. "Rin?"

"I'm ok," she smiled, feeling her body tremble as he pushed open the doors to the master bedroom.

He glanced over, "And this is the bedroom," he spoke, watching with bated breath as Rin took it all in.

_It looked the same_, she thought, her face breaking out in a smile. While she had packed up somethings for their new home, the things she had left were still here. The large photo she had framed of their kiss in front of the eiffel tower was still hanging on the wall above the white settee. The two photos of them celebrating New Year's and attending Shippo's birthday still hung on either side of the king sized bed. "You kept them," she murmured, walking to the large black frame.

Sesshomaru leaned against the wall, keeping his distance as she reacquainted herself with the room. "I couldn't bring myself to take them down." He pushed himself off the wall and walked towards her, running his arm down the length of her body as he kissed her neck.

"Rin," he looked back at her, his eyes now burning with lust, _he couldn't hold back. Not any longer._ "Tell me when you want to stop."

She nodded, leaning up to press her lips against his. "Don't stop," she told him. "Sesshomaru," she began to unbutton his shirt, grinning as she pushed off the cotton from his torso. She bit her lip as she ran her hands over his chest, a pool of warm liquid settling between her thighs. "You're so handsome," she murmured, "Impossible handsome." She then tried to remove his belt, however she was unsuccessful, giggling as he swatted her hands away.

"It's not fair that I'm the only one getting naked," his voice oozed with sensuality, motioning for Rin to turn.

_This is it, _Rin blushed as he unzipped her dress, the chiffon falling to the floor to reveal the lace babydoll. She turned to face him, "I-I..." she played with the bottom of the lace, "Do you like it?"

He cursed, feeling his erection harden as his gaze trailed over her thin, nubile body. "Fuck," he took her hips into his hands and pulled her close, slamming his body into hers as he took her lips. Their lips clashed, his tongue sweeping her warm, sweet cavern. His hold on her tightened as she dug her nails into his back, her whimpers for more nearly snapping his self-control into pieces. Lust coursed through his veins, his hands wandering over her supple form.

"Keep it on," he told her when they parted for breath, his voice heavy with want. His strong arms locked her in place as he scooped her up and placed her on the foot of the bed.

Rin felt her heart skip a beat as he kicked off his pants and removed his briefs. Her gaze fell to his member that jutted out and blushed, her nerves in overload as he smirked. _We're doing this_, she thought, her fingers curling into the white duvet, _it's like he's back._

"Do you see something you like?" He teased, watching as Rin nodded her head. She moved onto her hands and knees and crawled towards him, his self-control crumbling as she moved.

_Rin, his nymphet, dressed in white. _

Soon her small hands reached out to touch his lean form. She began at his navel, pressing a soft kiss to his skin as she moved down, past his pelvis, to that hard flesh. She grinned as their eyes met, her fingers delicately touching the sides of his erection. When she placed a kiss at its tip his mind went blank, groaning as she took the rest of him inside of her warm mouth. "Fuck," he threw his head back, _how he had dreamed of this._

"Rinnnn..." he hissed, his hands finding their way into her hair, guiding her as she brought him to completion. His knees buckled when he came, "Rin," he moaned, watching as Rin released her hold on him and settled back onto her knees. She blushed as she wiped her mouth with the back of her hands, his warm seed coating her throat as she swallowed. He was panting now as he moved over her, his lips finding hers once more as he caressed her sides.

"Rin," he murmured, kissing her neck, "Kami," he drank her taste like a starved man, "You're beautiful." He told her, worshipping her body, "Ethereal. Kami," he tugged off her white thong and tossed it over the bed, chuckling as she crossed her legs.

"You nymph," he growled playfully as she locked her legs around him and twisted over so that she sat on his hard chest.

"Wait a second," she tapped her finger lightly on his chest, "Where's my coffee?" She asked with a naughty grin, her fingernails trailing over his abdomen.

He raised his eyebrow, "I think you've already quenched your thirst."

She blushed, "Sessh..." She shivered as their eyes met, "Sesshomaru?"

He took her hesitation as a chance to flip himself over her. "Mm," she sighed wistfully, basking in his sweet kisses and touches. Her fingers gripped his lean back, pushing herself up to peck his lips, "I love you."

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin yawned as she laid on top of Sesshomaru, rubbing her eyes as she struggled not to fall asleep. <em>Sex on the first date,<em> she thought, _Ayame was right. _

"Sleep," his gruff voice commanded, his own eyes fighting off slumber.

Rin giggled, pressing a firm kiss onto his toned torso. "Don't tell me what to do," she wrapped her arms around him and smiled, "I'll sleep when I want."

"Hn," Sesshomaru smirked, stroking her naked back.

"I could stay like this forever," she whispered, shifting up so her head was tucked under his chin. "Cuddling with you." She placed a hand on his heart, "I didn't realize how much I missed this." Her eyes watered, _the night had been perfect. It was like the accident had never happened. He had been warm, affectionate, sarcastic, playful. He had given her kisses throughout the night, opened up to her as they snuggled in the greenhouse. She had learned so much about him that she had never known before._ She kissed his chest then, a single tear running down her porcelain cheek and onto his skin.

"You're crying," Sesshomaru wiped her eyes with the back of his hand, "Did I hurt you?" His eyes narrowed as he moved over so her head fell back onto the pillow he had laid upon. He moved up onto his elbows and inspected her wrists which he had tightly held when he had taken her.

Rin giggled, "No," she smiled, her eyes watering as she touched his cheek. "I'm just happy," she told him, sniffing as another tear fell down onto the pillow._ Because you're still here,_ she thought, mesmerized by his golden gaze. _My Maru. _

"Yet you cry," he teased, his hand moving to her waist to pull her closer.

She snorted lightly, "I always cry," she told him, tucking herself under his chin. "I'm just happy."_ That I'm still in love with you_, she smiled, placing a soft kiss along his collar bone. _That you're still my Maru. The man I fell in love with. _

"Hn," he stroked her skin, his fingers moving over her soft curves. "Rin... I've found recently, that it is difficult to sleep at night without you."

Rin froze, her heart stopping, "Oh?" She murmured finally, her hand finding his.

"It's foolish, isn't it?" He pulled back to look into her eyes, "Living in separate residences?"

"H-hai," she felt her lips quiver, "Does... does that mean you're coming home?" She asked, her voice hopeful.

"If you will have me," he answered, his gaze heavy with passion.

"Yes," she whispered, nodding her head, "Of course, I'd love that." Her eyes filled with tears as she leant up to kiss his lips, "Thank you," she murmured, her head resting on the same pillow as his. _This was like a dream. He was coming home to her. _

He raised his brow, "For?"

"Giving this a chance." She snuggled into his embrace, "For not giving up." She closed her eyes, whispering now. _She felt so drained, emotionally, physically. _

"Hn." He kissed her forehead, watching as her impossibly long eyelashes fluttered. _She was so beautiful, _he thought, holding his hand to her cheek. _Those brown doe eyes that entranced him, those pouty lips that teased him. The way she laughed so freely, loved so __fiercely. He was a fool to think he had never cared for her. A fool to hurt her like he had. But now, with her in his arms, it was like everything was the way it should. _

"Maru," she moaned, "I love you," she whispered as fell into a deep slumber.

He fell silent, his gaze flickering to the moon that peeked into his window. His fingers played with the rings on her hand, his mind wandering.

_My love is more than words_, he remembered, his thumb caressing the large jewel adorning her delicate finger. That phrase had been etched onto her engagement ring, himself wondering if she had ever found it.

_Perhaps one day_, he thought, _one day he could stop being a fool and tell her how he felt. _

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><p>.xoxo.<p>

* * *

><p>tuille<p> 


	17. Chapter 17

chapter 17

by

tuille

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><p>disclaimer: all that you recognize, i do not own.<p>

sorry for the super long wait but university has been crazy this term. i'm also sorry for not responding to reviews for this past chapter but i will get to them! i love, love reading them and i want you all to know that i truly appreciate them.

also, one piece of advice: never, ever do a thesis :P

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><p>Rin whistled as she carried in the box of flowers into the hotel, handing it to the fellow decorators the wedding planner had hired for that day. It had been three weeks since Sesshomaru and her had returned to Tokyo from their weekend getaway, and two weeks since he had officially moved back in. The past two weeks had felt like a dream, and now, they were both proud parents of a 9 week old, pure white Shiba-inu.<p>

_It was almost like everything was back to the way it was._

"Last box!" She exclaimed brightly, joining the man in the elevator. She leant against the silver railings and let out a deep breath, "Thank god."

Jakotsu laughed, "Getting rusty now, aren't we you old lady?"

Rin giggled, "I'm not old!" She elbowed him, "Just out of shape," she added with a silly grin.

He snorted, flipping his long hair behind him, "So all that sex with your gorgeous husband doesn't work your heart enough?"

Rin blushed, "Jak," she mumbled, her cheeks bright red.

He smirked, throwing his arm around her, "Hon, if I was married to your man, I'd have a six pack by now. We'd do it in the shower, the car, his desk..."

"Oh my god," she giggled, rushing out of the elevator as the doors opened. "I don't want to hear about how you'd like to do all kinds of dirty things to my husband."

"Oh Rin," he teased as he followed Rin to the wedding hall, "Forever the blushing bride." He held his hands up in the air, "But I guess that's just how the great Sesshomaru Takahashi likes them. He's the dominant," he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, "Isn't he?"

"You're such a pervert," she ducked away from his outstretched arms, "Does Bankotsu know you have a huge crush on my husband?"

"He does," He grinned, "I also happen to know that he has a thing for your brother-in-law."

She laughed, "Yash? Oh, he'd love to hear that."

"Mm," the tall man hooked his arm around his smaller friend's shoulder, "So Rin, what say you we decorate the hell out of this wedding and then later we grab lunch to celebrate our job well done?"

She nodded eagerly, taking in the boxes of flowers and the empty space in front of them. "You've got yourself a deal sir." She dusted off her black jeans, "Let's get to work!"

Three hours later the pair of florists were exhausted, their hands knicked with small cuts from the thorns, but it had been worth it. The wedding was perfectly decorated, with vases upon vases of flowers, it looked like a garden.

"Hey," Jakotsu muttered, yawning as he rested his chin atop of Rin's head, "I'm exhausted."

Rin giggled, "Now who's the old geezer?"

"Yeah, yeah," he moaned, "I'm so hungry and tired and hungry." He rubbed his eyes, "I'm going to bring down the boxes to the truck, yeah?"

"Ok. I'm just going to do a final check."

"You got it," he kissed her cheek as he moved towards the service elevator, taking a handful of boxes with him.

Rin yawned as she tidied up the bouquets, fixing the bows and adjusting the lengths of the stems. She smiled softly to the wedding planner as she slipped into the wedding hall, her brown eyes moving over the immaculately decorated room. Long, white tulips extended from glass vases that lined the aisle, while the alter shone brightly under the elegant crystal chandeliers. White flowers wrapped around the white marble pillars surrounding the room, the gold accented chairs standing in rows. "Perfect," Rin murmured, settling against the pillar in the back of the hall.

"Indeed."

Rin gasped as she turned quickly on her heel, her mouth curving into a wide grin at the sight of _him. _"Sesshomaru?" She held a hand to her heart, "What are you doing here?"

"I had a meeting with the Kimora Group this morning, they own this hotel." He began, tucking his hands into his pockets, "And as I was leaving this man wearing a pink suit assaulted me."

Rin giggled, "Oh, you mean Jakotsu." She cocked her head to the side, admiring his suit clad form. She wondered if he remembered who Jak was. "He works in the flower shop with Ayame and I. He's one of my closest friends. And..." She grinned, tucking her hair behind her ear. "He's very fond of you."

"Hn... he's very... affectionate." He frowned, remembering how the feminine man had thrown his arms around him and kissed his cheeks. "He told me I would find you here."

"I see," Rin laid her head against the cool marble as she listened to him, her heartbeat racing. _He still makes me so nervous, _she thought, toying with her rings. "I... I didn't get to say goodbye to you this morning."

Sesshomaru chuckled, stepping forward, "I tried to wake you, but you insisted on sleeping." His hand lifted, his long, elegant fingers stroking her rose tinted cheeks. "Perhaps last night's activities were too exhaustive for you?"

She blushed as he spoke, casting her gaze to the floor. She watched as his leather brogues moved towards her green tennis shoes, her breath hitching as she felt his hand on her waist.

"Do you think I could still get that goodbye kiss?"

She laughed lightly, laying her hand against his toned chest. Her gaze lifted to his, her brown eyes glimmering with mischief. "Maybe you've missed your chance," she replied, turning her head to the side.

"Then I shall simply steal one," he retorted with a smirk, turning her chin as his lips descended on hers for a brief moment.

Rin trembled at his touch, feeling light-headed when they parted. "Oh," she murmured, her eyes closing. "I..."

"I sent Jaken to take Ah-Un for a walk around lunch." Sesshomaru interrupted her, gesturing to the orchestra in the front who began to play the wedding march. He wrapped his arm around her small waist and tucked her into his side, his voice lowering. "He's also bringing him to the veterinarian for his check-up."

Rin nodded, "Oh," she lifted her head to meet his gaze, her hand finding his. She squeezed it lightly, smiling, "Thank you, I felt bad that I couldn't take him today."

"Hn." A playful smirk appeared on his face, "I can think of many other ways you could thank me."

She giggled, gently elbowing his side, "You mean how I could thank Jaken? You didn't do much, other than order him around."

"Hn," He snorted, resting his chin atop of her head. Soon the doors to the room opened, the string orchestra began their symphony, and the flower girl walked hand-in-hand with the ring-bearer down the aisle. The audience cooed at the young, adorable couple in matching garb, laughing as the little boy tripped over the rose petals the little girl threw around herself. Slowly, the march continued, bridesmaids dressed in elegant coral dresses, groomsmen dressed in black tuxedos. Then the bride emerged from the doors, her arm wrapped around her father's as a bright smile donned her perfectly angled face. Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed as his gaze moved over the woman. She wore a one shoulder white gown, her thin body accentuated in the tight dress. Surely, she was beautiful, but at that moment, he could only imagine his Rin.

_She had looked so beautiful..._

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p><em>Sesshomaru paced in the room as the time ticked down on his watch, the minute hand moving slower and slower. "Twenty-three minutes," he muttered, tapping his finger irritably against the glass. His shoulders were tense, his mind filled with a million thoughts. Twenty-three minutes before he would be married. He would be a husband soon, potentially a father in a couple of years, and it terrified him. Thoughts of whether he was ready pounded through his head, trepidation filling his every pore. <em>

_He was nervous, he realized, stopping to stand in front of the floor-length mirror. He was dressed in a black three-piece tuxedo, a black bow tie around his neck, and black leather shoes on his feet. His hair was loose and a set of white-gold cufflinks adorned the ends of his shirt. He chuckled as he fingered his tie, his hand shaking._

_"Only you," he murmured, shaking his head. Only his Rin could make him such a wreck. _

_His nerves about marriage had nothing to do with whether Rin was good enough, nor about whether he would miss bachelorhood. It had to do with him. His own self-doubts, about whether _he_ would be good enough. _

_Him? A husband? The man who once was deemed the Ice Prince by his peers, the man who had until recently forgotten to laugh, to smile, to care. __Married? It was like the gods were playing a joke. _

_He had never thought of marriage as a union, as the binding of two souls. His previous engagement had simply been a shrewd business decision, a contract of sorts. And yet, when it came to Rin, he yearned to take her as his wife. _

_"Until death do us part," he murmured, taking out the velvet box from his pocket. He memorized the curves of the platinum bands and the diamonds that caught the sunlight. "Twenty one minutes."_

_"Having second thoughts?" Inutaisho asked as he stepped into the lounge, finding his eldest son looking at the set of wedding bands. _

_Sesshomaru's gaze lifted to meet his father's, his tone dry, "Hardly." _

_"Well, I just came in to wish you luck." He smiled, walking towards him. "I'm proud of you." Inutaisho told him, clasping his shoulder. "I have to admit, I never would have expected you to marry someone like Rin." He chuckled as Sesshomaru's brows knitted together, "If someone told me three years ago that you would be marrying a florist, a young woman so effervescent, so charming, and beautiful, I would have laughed. Now, I still laugh, but she's good for you." He grinned, "Too good for you." _

_Sesshomaru snorted at his words, "I agree." He rubbed his chin, the nerves running through him. "I adore her," he said finally, his eyes trained on the doors to the lounge. _

_Nineteen minutes. _

_"I'm glad, because so does the rest of Tokyo." Inutaisho walked to the bar and poured out two shots of sake, handing one to his son as he returned. "To calm you." He smiled, "I don't think I've ever seen you so nervous." _

_Sesshomaru exhaled sharply, looking at the clear liquid. "Only her." He murmured, thoughtful as he glanced up at his father. Guilt then wracked through him, the unwarranted hate he once held for his father now eating at him. He understood now, the intense love Inutaisho had for Izayoi. _

_"I never understood marriage." He began, his voice cool as he toyed with the glass. "I thought love was a fable, a myth really. But I understand now." He held the glass to his lips, relishing in the alcohol as he took the shot. "I also understand why you did it." His gaze met his father's, "Why you took another wife." The empty glass in his hand was soon filled with more sake, "You loved Izayoi, I can see that now. How you could leave mother."_

_Inutaisho nodded, honoured to hear such words. "She's my life," Inutaisho returned, "Just as I can see Rin is yours." He smiled, patting his son's shoulders, "I'm happy for you, to finally know love. To have something to cherish, love, and protect. It won't always be as easy as it is now. There are times when Izayoi has driven me crazy, but then there are so many more times when we're happy. I promise you Sesshomaru, you will never regret marrying the person you love." _

_Sesshomaru nodded, lifting his glass to his father's. "To marriage."_

_Inutaisho smiled, "To marriage."_

_..._

_Sesshomaru tensed as he waited in the gazebo, his gaze cold as he studied his surroundings. White flowers decorated the entire length of the aisle, white chairs in rows, and white lanterns hanging from the trees. Their guests were all seated now, whispering amongst themselves._

_"Thinking of becoming the runaway groom?" Kouga teased as he leaned forward, "Because I think if you ran fast enough, you could get away before they come out." _

_Sesshomaru rolled his eyes in response, "Remind me, why are you my best man?" _

_"One, I'm the only friend you have. Two, Rin loves me. And three, I look great in this suit." He grinned wolfishly as the french doors opened, revealing his nephew and a family friend's daughter. "And so it begins," he murmured __ominously, taking a step back. _

_Sesshomaru smirked as Shippo waved enthusiastically to him as they walked down the aisle with exaggerated slow steps. The guests laughed at the children who were taking their sweet time to the front. The bridesmaids soon followed the young couple, each wearing off the shoulder yellow dresses._

_Kouga winked as his eyes made contact with his wife, thrusting his thumbs up into the air momentarily. Once the bridesmaids made their way to the front, the orchestra changed their song, and Rin stepped into view. _

_"Wow," Kouga murmured, she looked breathtaking. He glanced over to Sesshomaru to gauge his reaction, smiling as the corner's of Sesshomaru's lips curled up, his gaze set on his future wife. _

_"He's head over heels," Inuyasha murmured into Kouga's ear, straightening out his tie. _

_"Who wouldn't?" Kouga replied with a grin, "She's a vision." _

_"She's mine," Sesshomaru interjected sternly, his eyes glinting over to theirs for a brief moment. _

_Inuyasha laughed, elbowing Kouga's arm, "We've got our own women, just treat her well and we'll let you keep her." _

_"Hn," Sesshomaru cleared his throat as she approached, stepping forward to help her up onto the gazebo. She looked enchanting in her dress, the feelings he had for her in that single moment entirely overwhelming. He could see the nerves flittering in her brown eyes, her small hands shaking in his. She turned away briefly to hand off her bouquet to her maid of honor, her hands finding their way back to his. He squeezed them comfortingly, the vicar soon beginning his speech. _

_The ceremony was like a blur, all he could focus on was Rin. Her smile. The tears appearing in her eyes, those perfect teardrops that fell onto her porcelain cheeks. He cared for her so deeply, so passionately. _

_She looked so heartachingly beautiful in her dress. _

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>Sesshomaru's hold on Rin tightened at the memory, causing her to tilt her head back, her large brown eyes captivating his attention. No words were said, he could see the question through her gaze. He shook his head, kissing the top of her head to reassure her.<p>

_Kami, _he thought, those emotions coursing through him like a steam engine. That memory had been terrifying. The emotions intense, choking him as if his tie had begun to strangle him. Half of his mind called for him to run. To leave this girl and all that she represented. Yet the other part called for him to stay, to _love _this woman.

_To cherish. To hold. _

"Sesshomaru?" Her soft voice called out for him, her hand flush against his cheek, "You look sick." She murmured, her tone sympathetic. "Are you alright?"

He swallowed deeply as he looked into those brown eyes, the priest's voice echoing in the room. "Until death do yee part," his timbre voice caused Sesshomaru to shudder.

_Just like he remembered. _

He pictured her so easily in her dress, it was as if she was wearing that white gown. "Rin," he whispered, his hands shaking as they cupped her cheeks. His mind was hazy, the past and the present melding together. The feelings he had for her were overpowering, his sense of reality skewed as her delicate fingers touched his skin. The ache in his head returned, the digging of his skull, the sharp twist in his brain.

"Rin," he whispered harshly, "I..." He released his hold on her, his hands burning as if she were on fire.

_He couldn't breathe. _

"I need to go," he said finally, "I can't..." He let out a shaky breath, "I need to go to back to work." _He was running away, _his mind mocked, calling him out for his cowardice. "I'll see you at home," he added as he pressed a firm kiss to her temple.

_He needed to get away. _

He moved quickly out of the room, his movements silent as he rushed out of the hotel.

Rin bit her lip as he left, a certain unease settling in the pit of her stomach. _It's ok, _she told herself, _he's probably just busy. _Her gaze shifted to the couple in front of the room, clapping as they kissed.

_We're ok, _she told herself, her head turning back one final time to the double doors._ We're going to be ok._

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><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

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><p>"Good afternoon Takahashi-sama," his secretary greeted him as he walked past, moving off of her chair to follow him to his office. "Your meeting with Mushi and Moto has been pushed back until next week. They've failed to acquire enough capital to hire our services so the board decided to give them an extension. You have a phone call waiting on line 4 and a dinner at 5:15 with the head of Abone. His secretary has yet to send the details but I will forward them to you as soon as I get them."<p>

Sesshomaru stood in front of his office doors, his shoulders tense. He was still on edge from the wedding. "Is that all?"

"N-no sir," she stuttered, holding her notepad to her chest, "The artist came in today with the painting you ordered. He left it by the fireplace."

"The artist?" He murmured, his shoulders lowering as he looked thoughtfully, "I commissioned a painting?"

"Yes sir, for your wi-..." she swallowed, "For Rin, her birthday is next week..." she finished, unsure how to continue.

Sesshomaru nodded, his eyes narrowing, _her birthday? _"Very well."

"Of course sir," his secretary bowed her head, "If, if I may be so bold, you also ordered something from the jeweler. They called today to say it was ready."

Sesshomaru frowned as he opened his doors, his tone clipped, "Send Jaken to pick it up."

"Yes sir." She swiftly turned on her heel and returned to her desk.

_It was empty, _he mused, as he stepped into his office, taking it all in. There were no longer images of Rin on the mantle, her scarves no longer left on the back of those leather seats. The only touches of her presence were an empty glass vase on the coffee table and a photo of her in a wedding dress on the edge of his desk. _He missed her already, _he thought briefly, setting his briefcase on the leather settee in front of the fireplace.

"The artist," he muttered as he spotted the painting leaning against the wall. He moved towards it, lifting the canvas and turning it over to see the image. His breath hitched at what he found, the request coming back to him. The painting was of the two of them on a beach, kissing each other as the waves lapped against their feet. He admired the soft brushstrokes and detailed background. The hues and tones matched the painting in their bedroom, _a sister piece._ In the painting, Rin was smiling as they kissed, wearing a white dress that flowed with the wind. _She was so small, so delicate. So beautiful._

His eyes closed as he reminisced of that day. _Their engagement, _he thought,_ t__he day he asked her to become his wife._

"Damnit," he cursed as he set the painting back against the fireplace, the searing pain to his head returning. He rubbed his temples, the migraine not subsiding. He glanced back at his desk, his phone beeping to indicate a call on hold. He had work to do, he reminded himself, he needed to be productive. He had to stop daydreaming about his wife.

_"Sesshomaru?" _

He tensed as the memory of Rin walking in his office pushed through; it was almost as if she were actually here. Her image was soft and glowing white. He could still see the pain in her eyes, the betrayal, _the hate. _

_He hurt her. _

"Rin," he murmured, his eyes widening as he took a step forward. His hand reached out, before the image of her vanished.

"Kami," he clenched his eyes shut, urging himself to clear his head. _He was hallucinating now. _He couldn't concentrate, his mind was clouding with old thoughts and memories.

_Everything reminded him of her. _

He exhaled sharply as he walked out of his office, taking his time as he tried to clear his head. It wasn't long before he found himself in front of another set of doors. "Wolfe," he muttered, pushing the handle open.

Kouga looked up from his desk as the doors to his office opened, surprised to see Sesshomaru step in, his tie loose, his eyes dark. He looked haggard. "Sesshomaru," he greeted, his tone cool. Their interactions since the accident had been tense, awkward, and filled unspoken anger.

"Wolfe." Sesshomaru ran his hand over his head, "I hope I'm not interrupting you."

Kouga raised his brow, snarling, "Since when do you give a shit about people other than yourself?"

Sesshomaru laughed bitterly, used to his friend's outbursts of anger. He tugged his tie loose, "I've been an ass, haven't I?"

"I'd say that an ass would be an understatement, but sure. Ass." He folded his arms as he leant back into his chair. "What do you want?"

Sesshomaru frowned, _what did he want? _He looked over his friend's office, taking in the numerous flowers and plants, the colorfully framed photos, and candy dish. _Ayame was good for him, _he mused, his gaze then falling on the the ballon that floated beside his desk.

_It's a boy. _

His mouth went dry, his mind turning. "She's pregnant?"

Kouga met his gaze, "Yeah. Two months." He couldn't help but smile at the thought, "We don't know what the sex is yet but Ayame sent me this today," he tugged on the string of the ballon, "Heh."

Sesshomaru swallowed, "I see." He tore his gaze away from the blue ballon, _it's a boy. _ His chest tightened, "Congratulations," he said finally.

Kouga nodded, "Thanks." He stood up from his seat, his own visage tired, "Look, Sesshomaru, I've got work I need to get done so if you came here to ask me to write up another one of those fucked up marriage contracts, or a divorce agreement or whatever fucked up shit you want, I can't." He met his gaze evenly, "I won't. And you know what? I'm just going to say this to you because the fucking guilt is killing me. The only reason I did write that in the first place is because then I would know you weren't going to screw Rin over with some bullshit clause."

Sesshomaru frowned as he contemplated his friend's outburst, "Would I?"

Kouga faltered, "What?"

"Screw Rin over," he moved to sit in the leather seat in front of the large desk, "As you so eloquently put it?"

Kouga's gaze narrowed, "Screw Rin over?" He almost laughed, "Well let's see." He held up three fingers, ticking them off as he listed his reasons. "Well first, you shove an annulment down her throat just a week after her miscarriage. Second, Rin walked in on you as you were hooking up with the intern in your office. And then, the icing on the fucking cake. You wanted me to get a court-ordered paternity test on your dead fetus," he snarled, "Shall I go on?"

Sesshomaru felt cold as his friend spoke, _had he done that? Those moments from only weeks ago felt like a lifetime away. _

"Damnit Sesshomaru," Kouga clenched his fists, watching his unmoving body, "What do you want?"

"I came here to apologize," Sesshomaru said evenly, "For what I've done."

Kouga's brows raised, "What?" He almost laughed, "You're apologizing? I don't fucking believe it," he ran his hand through his hair as he sat back down. "You never apologize."

Sesshomaru nodded his head, "I am sincerely sorry."

Kouga blinked, "Ok." He let out a deep breath, "Fuck man. You make me feel like I'm back in high school with all this bullshit drama."

Sesshomaru smirked, "Are you saying that you feel like a teenage girl, Wolfe?"

He rolled his eyes, "Whatever ice-man. So is that it? You came to say sorry?"

Sesshomaru frowned, "Not exactly. I... I need advice."

"Asking for an advice and an apology? Hell's frozen over," he muttered, folding his hands behind his head, "Alright Sesshomaru, go for it."

"Very well." Sesshomaru rubbed his ring finger, choosing his words wisely. "My relationship with Rin is... different. At times it's simple. It's easy to pretend that everything is ok. To laugh with her, to hold her, to act like everything is ok. But then I remember. I have flashbacks of what I've done to her, the pain, the anger I caused her, and I start to hold back. Because I don't deserve her." He cast his gaze down to the carpeted floors, "But I won't let her go. Because I'm a selfish bastard and she's _mine. _I just... I don't know what to do."

Kouga was quiet as Sesshomaru spoke, contemplative. "I think your solution is quite simple. You're in love with your wife Sesshomaru, that's not the worst thing that could happen to you."

Sesshomaru rubbed his face, "I hurt her. She should hate me."

"She should," Kouga murmured, "But I know for a fact that she's still hopelessly in love with you."

Sesshomaru sighed, glancing down at his wedding band. "She's... everything. But sometimes, I wake up and I forget where I am. Who she is. And she knows, she knows when I don't remember her. She tries to hide it, but you know as well as I that she can't lie. Those are the moments that I hate the most, when we're strangers."

"But then you remember?"

He nodded, "It's like a flood that comes through my head, a torrent of images. And I know who she is. I know how I should feel. And yet I still hold back, I still can't..."

"Tell her?" Kouga finished, "That you love her?"

Sesshomaru exhaled deeply, "When I woke up from that accident, I wasn't _me. _I hurt her so much. She should hate me," he murmured, "Yet I don't have it in me to let her go. She's _mine_. However pathetic that sounds."

"Stop holding back." Kouga leaned forward in his chair, "You're just hurting her even more by doing that. Rin broke down all your walls once, except the one you kept around your heart. You're getting a second chance Sesshomaru, to love her. And you don't deserve it," he shook his head, "You don't fucking deserve it because you broke her. But _she_ deserves it. She deserves to be so happy in love, and the only man she ever did and will love is you. So I'm telling you now, make her happy. Wake up every fucking morning and tell her that she's beautiful, that she's the best thing that ever happened to you, and that you _love_ her. Because she deserves it."

Sesshomaru was quiet, toying with the platinum ring around his finger. _She deserves it. _

_Aishiteru Rin._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>"Hey!" Rin called out as she walked through the back entrance of their shop, "How was the doctor's appointment?" She asked as she stepped into the office, setting her bag on her white desk.<p>

Ayame tensed as Rin stepped in, her heart running as she forced a smile on her face. "Great," she returned, her voice lacking her brightness and enthusiasm for life. "How... how was the wedding?"

Rin's smile fell, her small form rushing to her friend. "Ayame?" Her voice cracked with concern, reaching for her friend's hand, "What's wrong?"

Ayame looked away, her gaze darting to her phone where a message from Kouga was blinking forward. "Rin..." She knew she had to say something, she had been keeping this secret from Rin, her best friend, someone she considered family, for far to long. "My doctor's appointment was with an OBGYN." She closed her eyes, licking her lips. "I'm pregnant."

Rin's eyes widened, her gaze falling to Ayame's belly. Through her purple blouse the slight fullness was visible. "Oh my god," she murmured, looking back up at Ayame. She recognized that healthy glow, "You're pregnant?"

_How could she not have known? Looking back, the signs were so obvious. The morning sickness, the dizziness, the doctor's appointments. _She suddenly felt horrible, guilt weighing down on her chest. She had been so concerned with her own problems that she failed to realize that her best friend was pregnant.

_How could she have been so selfish? _

She wrapped her arms around Ayame, "Oh Ayame, I'm so happy for you!"

"Yeah?" Ayame gave a slight laugh, toying with her earrings, "I'm glad."

"How far are you?" She asked, moving her chair over to Ayame's.

"Two months and 14 days," Ayame smiled softly, patting her stomach, "Kouga thinks it's going to be a boy."

Rin giggled, "Men." She playfully rolled her eyes, "They always think it's going to be a boy." She grinned, "So! When did you find out? Today? Does everyone else know yet?"

"Um," Ayame played with the edges of her blouse, "No one else knows. I've... I've known for a few weeks actually."

"A few weeks?" Rin's brows knitted together, her countenance faltering, "Ayame, why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't know how to tell you Rin. I mean," she played with her hands, "With Sesshomaru and the accident..."

Rin swallowed,"Oh." She felt her heart wrench at the thought, _the accident. _Because only a month ago had she been pregnant.

_Had, being the key word._

_Only a month ago she too was almost a mother. _She looked at Ayame's belly, despising the green-eyed monster that reared it's ugly head. _How could she be jealous of Ayame? Ayame deserved this, she was the kindest, most gracious person she had ever known. _

She blinked back the tears, wiping her eyes, "Ayame, I'm so sorry. I was such a wreck, utterly selfish, and generally not fun to be around. I'm such a horrible friend." She bit her lip, "I know you're going to be the greatest mom ever. Just like I'm going to be the greatest godmother," she grinned, "Right?"

"Right." Ayame nodded her head and pulled Rin close for another hug. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I didn't want to hurt you, or I don't know..."

"It's ok." Rin smiled, "I know you were just looking out for me. I'm really happy for you both. That kid is going to have two of the greatest parents on this planet." She patted Ayame's belly, "I'm going to spoil you when you come out," she cooed, "I'll be that fun aunt who takes you to the amusement parks and lets you eat all the junk food in the store."

Ayame giggled, clapping her hands together, "We have to go shopping soon! There's so much I need to buy..."

"Of course!" Rin beamed, her smile faltering as her chest tightened at the thought of picking out baby items.

_Takehiko._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin was quiet as she stepped into her home, shivering as she hung up her bag and kicked off her shoes. <em>It was quiet<em>, she thought, pursing her fingers trailed over the freshly painted walls, her heart heavy as she thought back to her encounter with Ayame. She had been in her own little bubble for so long that she failed to notice that Ayame was pregnant. She wanted to kick herself for the jealousy that still lingered, for she yearned for what her friend had.

_The blissfully happy marriage, the pregnancy. Just like she had once had only weeks ago. _

She knew that Ayame and Kouga deserved this gift of life; they had been trying for the past year to get pregnant. They were both so kind, generous, patient - they were going to be great parents. She was genuinely happy for them, but at the same time, hearing that Ayame was pregnant caused that ache in her heart to return.

Rin let out a deep breath as she tried to collect herself. _Happy thoughts, _she told herself, _happy thoughts. _After a moment she continued to walk through the house in search of her newest roommate. Soon she found Ah-Un curled up in front of the fireplace. Various pillows were strewn along the floor, with a vase on the coffee table knocked over, the flowers chewed up, and the marbles in a large pile.

She could not help but laugh at the sight. "Why hello you little rascal," she cooed, dropping onto her knees to cuddle the soft puppy. The dog looked back up at her with sleepy eyes, lifting it's head in greeting. "You're the cutest thing in the world, aren't you?" Rin exclaimed, nuzzling her nose with his. "Oh, I can't get mad at you." She giggled as Ah-Un licked her nose, "Did you have a good day with Jaken-sama?" She glanced down at the plastic box he had been chewing on, shaking her head, "Where did you get this?" She asked, placing him back on the dog bed he had been lying on. "What have you been playing with?" She asked, gently scratching behind his ears. She picked up the DVD, her heart clenching at the title.

"Rin and Sesshomaru's Wedding," she murmured, a cold sweep moving through her. She had only watched this DVD once before packing it away for the move. Her hands shook as she lifted the cover, her index finger moving the DVD in a circle.

She sniffled as she sunk onto the floor, her thoughts wandering to Sesshomaru. _Everything had been going so well so far. But sometimes, she could tell, by the way he looked at her, that he didn't remember who she was. Sometimes he held back, acting so distant and cold. But then there were those days where he smiled and made her laugh, when he held her throughout the night and spoke sweet nothings into her ear. Those were the moments she clung to so desperately, those moments she wished could last forever. _

Ah-Un whined as he noticed Rin's mood shift, his wet nose pressing into her arm. Alarmed Rin jumped, letting out a shaky laugh as the puppy nudged her again. "I'm ok," she murmured, playing with his perfectly shaped ears. "I'm just really emotional today, huh?" She quickly shut the case, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. "It's silly how I'm already crying," she joked to the puppy who nuzzled her feet.

Her mind drifted again as she scratched Ah-Un's ears to the morning when Sesshomaru had found her in the ballroom. He had looked ill, pale, his eyes unreadable. She couldn't help but wonder what he was thinking of.

"Woof!"

When she glanced down it was like Ah-Un was grinning at her, her smile growing as she looked into his black eyes. She immediately shrugged off her black cloud of thoughts, "You my friend, are the cutest dog ever. Let's go get you something to eat!" She slapped her thighs as she stood up, the puppy following her to the kitchen. "So would you care for some chicken tonight or beef?" She asked, taking two different tins from the bottom cabinet. She held the two up, one at a time, assessing his response. She giggled as he jumped up onto her legs when she lifted the chicken. "Chicken it is."

"Ruff!" Ah-Un waved his tail in anticipation, running circles around her feet as she made him a bowl.

"There you go," she set the bowl on the black mat set by the kitchen doors. "I'll go clean up the mess you made in the living room while you eat."

She spent the next few minutes cleaning up, setting the pillows back on the couch, the flowers in the trash, and marbles in the vase. When she finally came to the wedding movie, she opened the drawer full of their home-made videos to return it, her gaze moving over the various titles. "Shippo's Birthday, Trip to Paris, Our First Summer..." She soon trailed off, her heart stopping as she saw the last DVD. She could not help but whimper as she pulled out that white case, her fingers moving over the black letters along the spine.

"Baby #1," she whispered, tears filling her eyes, "17 weeks." A shiver ran up her arms as she held the case, closing her eyes. The ultrasound was taken just two days before the accident. Sesshomaru had been too busy to attend the appointment, so she had the DVD made to show him. A broken breath escaped Rin's lips as she struggled to contain her emotions.

"He never got to see it," she murmured, glancing up at the large, black screen. _Could she do it? _She wondered, _could she bear to watch this? _

It was as if her body was moving on its own, the DVD in the player and herself settled on the leather couch. She hugged a pillow to her chest as the movie started, the sound system echoing with the rhythmic sounds of a beating heart. Her heart clenched as she watched the small form move in her womb. The images were grainy, his small feet visible as he danced inside.

"Your head is so big," she murmured, clutching the sides of the pillow. She giggled as the image moved to focus on his heart, the organ fluttering. _He looked so perfect with his tiny nose, his well developed spine and toes. It was still so awe-inducing that she had created him. That he had grown inside of her. _

_Had..._

That was the most heart-breaking of all. To know that he had been alive inside of her, living, breathing, and then to have him taken from her in a single instant.

_It broke her. _

Rin felt her eyes water, her lips trembling.

_He would have been so perfect. _

_Her son, _she thought, _she had been so happy to be pregnant. _They had never explicitly tried to conceive, both of them happy to just let fate takes its course. But fate was also cruel, she added bitterly, tearing her eyes away from the screen, no longer able to watch. A sob escaped her as she held her hand to her mouth, her body shaking as she cried.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, "I'm sorry I couldn't protect you." She felt like she failed as a mother. The guilt inside of her was heavy, weighing down her heart. She failed to protect him, to keep him safe, and he had died.

Rin rocked herself as she wept, the floodgates opening. She cried as she mourned the loss of her child. Her baby. Her love.

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru frowned as he walked into their home, setting his keys on the glass table that stood nearby the front door. He could hear Rin's soft cries from the foyer, his amber eyes darkening. "Rin?" He called out, finding his way towards her. He found her curled up on the couch, her head in her arms as she cried. Their newly acquired pup was snuggled against her thin legs, whining softly to him in greeting.<p>

"Ah-Un," he murmured, picking the small dog up from the couch and setting him onto the wood floor, "Go to the kitchen."

The dog yapped obediently, scurrying away from the living room. His gaze moved towards Rin once more, "Rin," he asked, his voice calm, "Why is it that you cry?"

She mumbled incoherently through her tears, her cheeks marred with the frays of the pillow, her eyes red and puffy. "He," her hands hid her face as he moved the pillow off of her lap. "He was perfect," she whispered as he knelt in front of her, his large hands cupping her warm cheeks. Her breath hitched, her voice shaky, "He was inside of me and now... now he's _gone_. I want him back," her brown eyes opened, filled with angst, "I want him back so much."

His brows knitted together_, _his gaze moved over her, soon finding the empty DVD case lying next to her legs. _Baby #1._ "Takehiko," he murmured, understanding now. The pain she felt, the tears she shed. His thumbs moved simultaneously to wipe her eyes, "I see."

"I didn't get to say goodbye," she murmured, her speech impeded by her shaky breath, "And now, now he's _gone_."

Sesshomaru swallowed deeply, closing his own eyes. He felt the heaviness in his chest, _for he too felt the angst of losing their son. _He moved up to embrace her; it was second nature now to hold her when she cried. His arms wrapped around her small form, his head resting against hers. They stayed in their embrace, silent except for her tears. Sesshomaru patiently waited as she wept, thankful that his presence had been calming for her, her cries reduced to a single tear.

Finally, Sesshomaru spoke, "He would have been beautiful."

Rin sniffed, nodding in agreement, "Incredibly." She shuddered, a cold wind moving past her. "I dream about him sometimes," she whispered, "About what he would have been like." She offered him a soft smile, looking up at him with her cloudy doe-eyes, "He would have been an athlete."

He chuckled slowly, pressing a firm, brief kiss on her forehead, "He would have been a genius."

"Of course," she giggled, her mood changing as her hand lifted to stroke his angled cheeks. "He would have looked like you," she murmured, "So incredibly handsome."

Sesshomaru shivered at her touch, "Rin."

"I'm sorry," she cast her eyes down to the floor, "For being like... _this_." _So pathetic. _

"There's no need," he murmured.

Rin sniffed, "I know I'm supposed to be strong, to move on, and sometimes I can. Sometimes it's ok. I go on like everything's ok, but then sometimes it just hits me that he's gone. And..." She bit her lip to suppress her tears, "And then it _hurts_. Like my heart's broken into a million pieces." She wiped the back of her hand against her runny nose. "Because he was _ours_." Her voice cracked, "I'm sorry," she made a face as she pulled away, "I'm crying again."

"Crying is not a weakness," he told her, "It takes strength to cry, to be courageous enough to show your heart."

She sniffed, rubbing her eyes. "It's just that sometimes... sometime I feel so alone." _Because with Takehiko, she had a chance to have her own family. _

"Rin, you're not alone." He reminded her as his hand found her wedding bands, "I will forever be by your side."

_Forever? _

She wondered, mesmerized by his golden gaze. _Truly? _"Thank you," she bowed her head, watching as Sesshomaru stood up. _He's leaving, _she thought fleetingly, her mind chastising her heart for aching. She rubbed her eyes, clearing her throat as she spoke, "I was going to make us supper but I didn't get to-"

"It's fine." He cut her off, holding out a hand for her to take.

Rin nodded, taking his hand, "Hai..." She dusted off her pants as she stood, "I think I'm going to go shower. There's some ramen in the cupboards somewhere if you're hungry, or maybe there's some..."

"Rin," he took her hand and pulled her close, his molten honey eyes looking deeply into hers, "You're rambling." His hold on her softened, "You only do that when you're upset."

She let out a soft laugh, "Remnants from my breakdown. I'm ok." She leant up and kissed his cheek, "Thank you," she murmured sincerely, "For being... here." She looked up at him under her long lashes, _for being you. _

"Hn," Sesshomaru's gaze followed her as she moved away from him and up the stairs. He sighed as he lifted the empty case, toying with its plastic edges. Today had been both emotionally and physically draining. First was the wedding, where he relived that intense moment in his life when he took Rin as his wife. And second was his conversation with Kouga, where he rekindled their friendship. But then he came home and found Rin crying. That was the worst. He felt so helpless, knowing that she was still hurting so much.

"Takehiko," he murmured, flicking on the TV screen, his heart clenching at the grainy image of his _almost _son. He frowned as the video continued, his hand clenching the remote tightly. His head hurt, the images blurring together. His other hand lifted to pinch the arch of his nose, pain radiating in his chest.

_He remembered him. _

He remembered those moments when he would hold Rin's growing belly, those moments where they would spend the day stealing kisses and cuddling. He remembered buying a pair of baby shoes to surprise Rin, helping her build the crib, and laughing with her as they dreamt of their future child. He remembered their first doctor's appointment and the moment she told him that he was going to be a father. How beautiful she looked, pregnant with his child.

He struggled to look away from the TV screen, cursing as he felt a single tear run down his cheek, his breaths shaky and uneven.

_For he too felt the angst of losing their son._

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin wiped her eyes as she looked at herself in the mirror, rubbing the residual mascara off of her lashes. The shower had been calming, her form no longer aching.<p>

"Rin?" Sesshomaru's voice was tentative, his lean body accentuated in his grey t-shirt and black briefs.

She gave him a weak smile as their gaze met through the mirror, her hand curling over her hairbrush. "I'm sorry," she hung her head, ashamed for her emotional outburst, "You probably think that I'm crazy, crying all the time." She set the comb on the vanity, pursing her lips. "I'm not very stable right now," she joked, "Hormones, right?"

He didn't respond, his amber eyes cool as they assessed her figure.

She swallowed, feeling incredibly self-conscious as she stood in front of him, wearing nothing more than her bra and underwear. She blushed at her choice of undergarments, tropical floral patterns, something a pre-teen would wear. "I-um..." she chewed her bottom lip as her eyes trailed over his lean form, _impeccable. He always looked like perfection. _"How was the rest of your day?"

"Fine." His answer was blunt, straight to the point. His tone was cold, almost callous.

"Oh." Rin swallowed, _that awkwardness was back. _Her fingers curled in, struggling to restrain herself from running into his arms. _Because she wanted him to hold her again._ "Um," her shoulders tensed, goosebumps rising on her arms, "Sango called today, she said that she's throwing a surprise baby shower for Kagome next week."

"Hn." Sesshomaru frowned as she continued to prattle on. _He couldn't read her, her eyes were glassy, as if she were hiding something. _"You're still upset."

She shook her head, dismissing it, "I'm fine," she answered curtly, turning around to face the mirror.

"Do not lie to me Rin," he purred, his tone laced with danger as he took a step forward.

Her face scrunched up in response, urging herself not to breakdown, _again. _

_Be strong, _she told herself. Her gaze darted up to meet his in the mirror, _who are you now? _She wondered, _her Maru?_

"Rin?" His tone was softer now, his amber gaze warming.

Her lips trembled as he called her, "Sesshomaru," she squeezed her eyes shut, those tears building up. "I'm tired," she whispered, her voice aching with sorrow. "I'm just so tired."

He nodded, "I know." His arm wrapped around her small waist, "Then you shall go to bed." He gathered her form in his arms as he walked to their large bed.

Rin snorted as he carried her, resting her forehead on his firm chest. "I'm not a child," she murmured lightly in protest as he laid her onto the bed, seeking warmth under the blanket he tucked around her.

"I know," he replied, leaning in to press a kiss to her forehead, "You'll feel better when you sleep."

"Wait," her brown eyes opened, "Maru, stay with me," she pleaded, her hand finding his in the darkness.

He paused, his eyes meeting hers, "Very well," he replied. _He could never say no to her. _He slid into the bed, his body curved around hers.

"What are you thinking of?" He asked, lazily placing a kiss on the nape of her throat.

Rin sniffed, her body tingling at the sensation of his lips on her body. "That we almost had a son." Her lips trembled, "Everyone we know is pregnant. Ayame, Kagome. Sango already has kids, Jak and Bankotsu are trying to adopt and just..." she looked at the bedroom walls, the darkness engulfing the room, "I want that. I want to have what they have. And I did, _we_ did."

_For four months they had been so happy._

"And then it was gone. Everything was taken away from me. I woke up in that hospital bedroom alone in the world." _Just like she had been over a decade ago._ "I found out that I wasn't pregnant anymore and it was nightmare. Because for some reason, you hated me," she whispered harshly, wiping her eyes as she turned to face him. "You were so cold, so... so mean. And I was broken because the man I loved, and the son we almost had, were gone. And I remember lying in this bed, crying, alone. That's all I would do for days. Just crying until I couldn't cry anymore. I hated you for lying to me and I hated myself even more for ever believing your lies." She bit her lip, those memories aching in her chest, "I analyzed every single moment of our relationship, wondering what I did wrong. Wondering how stupid I had been to fall so hopelessly in love with you."

Sesshomaru shifted, the guilt racking through him, "Rin..."

She shook her head, lifting her fingers to his lips. "It's ok," she murmured, "I know you're here. I know we're going to be ok. But I still can't stop remembering those days..." She laid her head on his chest, her toes finding the warmth against his lean legs, "I know I need to stop dwelling in the past."

Sesshomaru slowly placed his hand over hers, his fingertips brushing over her smooth skin. She watched with tear filled eyes as his fingers explored her stomach, whimpering into his neck to stop herself from crying.

"I'm sorry," he murmured, whispering into her ear, "That I wasn't there for you."

Rin shook her head, lifting her other hand to wipe her eyes. "No," she moved her body up, her hands laying on his taut chest, "Don't apologize," she murmured, "It's not your fault."

His amber eyes darkened, "Nor is it yours." He brushed her hair with his fingers, memorizing her form. Her hair was long, glowing from the moonlight. Her large brown eyes were reddened around the edges, moist from her tears. "How could I have forgotten you?" He asked, questioning his sanity, "The only woman that I adore?"

_My wife?_

Rin trembled at his touch, shivers running down her body. "You adore me?" She asked finally, a soft smile donning her peach lips.

"Infinitely," he replied, tracing her mouth with his thumb. "I may not remember all of you, and perhaps I never will. But I know this," his hands encircled her rings. "I know how much you meant to me."

Rin sniffed, laughing as he smiled, "Even if I cry so easily?"

His thumb reached forward to catch her tears, "Even if you cry a thousand rivers."

_His words were so charming, _she thought, her eyes scanning his face for any sign of mistrust. She was still scared, a part inside of her terrified of being hurt. A part that called for her to run, to think his words were lies. Yet another part, her heart, her soul, yearned for him. His touch. His dazzling amber eyes, his cool arrogance and sophistication. His laughter, his smile, and the way he kissed her rings. Her teeth shivered, as if a cold breeze blew past her, "I love you," she told him, those words filled with her every being.

Sesshomaru leaned forward and took her lips, tasting her softly, slowly. _Say it, _his mind screamed, his fingers exploring her soft skin. Her ribs were still protruding from her abdomen, but he knew she was eating now. He undid her bra, the garment falling onto her lap. He chuckled as she blushed, taking the floral undergarment and tossing it onto the floor. "Look at me Rin," he murmured, grasping her chin in his palm. "You are beautiful."

She shook her head, sitting up onto her knees as her hands cupped the back of his head, tasting him as their lips touched and their tongues moved in a seductive dance. Sesshomaru groaned as he pulled away, "Not tonight," he whispered, his voice hoarse.

_He had to restrain himself from touching her. She was far too vulnerable, too emotionally fragile. _

Rin whined softly, "Please?" She pouted as he stayed immobile, sitting back onto his lap. "I'm not tired anymore," she murmured, her fingers trailing over his shirt-clad chest. They stopped at the edge of his shirt, toying with the cotton edges.

"No?" He chuckled, running his thumb over the dark circles under her eyes, "Yet your body tells a different story. How long has it been since you've slept for more than five hours?"

Rin shrugged, her thin shoulders moving up, "Awhile." She sighed, yawning suddenly, frowning at the smirk appearing on his face. "Fine," she conceded to his request, "I'll go to sleep." She nudged him back until he was laying on their bed, her head finding the sweet spot in the crook of his neck. "No sex... until the morning." She smiled as he laughed, her fingers instinctively searching for his left hand. The cool metal of his wedding band was soothing, almost reassuring.

_He was still here. He wasn't just a dream. _

"Sesshomaru?" Her voice called out for him.

"Hn?" He nuzzled his nose against her cheek, drunk off of her sweet scent.

"Do... do you think that maybe one day, we could have another son?" She shivered as his amber eyes opened, his gaze heavy and intense.

"Yes." He replied with such conviction, "We will have as many as you please."

She giggled happily as his strong arms wrapped around her, pulling her small body closer to his. "Even if I want seven?"

"Even if you want twelve." He leaned forward to press his lips against hers, "You're irresistible Rin. You know as well as I that I can never say no."

She smiled, "You're good for me," she told him, her soft voice drunk with fatigue, "Because you make me happy." She stroked his handsome face, "Really, really happy."

Sesshomaru lazily watched as she touched him, "Do I?"

"Mmhmm," she closed her eyes, lulled to sleep by his heartbeat and his warm embrace. "You'll always have my heart."

_Say it. _

Sesshomaru shifted over, pressing his lips against her cheek. _Three words, which she so frequently, so easily said. Yet what was holding him back? This woman he held in his arms, the one he dreamt of, the one who made him so impossibly happily, deserved everything he could give her. _

_Say it. _

His voice cracked, fragile and heavy with amore, "Ai... aishiteru." He said it slowly, taking his time with his confession.

_She was his everything. _

Her eyes fluttered, a soft smile donning her luscious lips as she slept. His words were hazy in her mind, perhaps his confession was a dream, but it felt so real.

_He loves me._

* * *

><p>xoxo<p>

tuille


	18. Chapter 18

chapter 18

by

tuille

disclaimer: all that you recognize, i do not own.

* * *

><p>the calm before the storm...<p>

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>"Good morning!" Rin greeted as she walked into the office, her hands full with a large box of flowers.<p>

"Rin-chan!" The secretary stood up from her seat and smiled, bowing her head politely.

"Hello Mura-chan, how have you been?" She asked as she moved towards the long, large desk. Rin set the box on the floor as she leaned against the countertop.

"Very well, how about you Rin?" She asked pleasantly, returning to her seat.

"Fantastic," she replied with a smile. "How are your boys?"

Mura laughed, "Horrid. Our youngest threw up his breakfast on me while I was getting ready for work, then proceeded to refuse to go to preschool while our oldest decided to give himself a haircut," she shook her head, "Honestly, never have kids-" Mura swallowed as she spoke, "Oh no, Ms. Rin, I'm sorry, how terrible insensitive of me-"

Rin laid her hand on Mura's, "It's fine. You didn't mean it."

Mura pursed her lips, "Yes well," she added hesitantly, "I'm sorry for your loss."

Rin's smile faltered slightly, "Thank you," she murmured, her gaze casting to the floor. "I'm doing much better. And thank you for the flowers." She glanced up and grinned, "They were beautiful."

"Of course," Mura smiled, "I'm glad to see you. The office has been looking so dull without your bouquets."

Rin giggled as she turned her head, surveying the empty vases, "Almost like a prison, ne?"

"Hai, are you here to see Takahashi-sama? He's due to come back from a business meeting by 11:20."

Rin blushed, "Is he?" She shrugged bashfully, "I may say hello before I leave."

Mura raised her brow, "Are you certain all you want to say is hello?"

Rin laughed as the secretary caught onto her scheme, "Ok. Ok. You got me," she sighed, fingering the marble counter, "It's... it's our anniversary today." _Did he remember? _

Mura smiled, "Congratulations."

"Thank you," she smiled wistfully, "I can't believe it's only been a year." She fingered her wedding bands, "You said he'd be back in an hour and a half, right?"

"Hai."

"And after?"

The secretary moved to her computer and typed furiously on the keyboard, "He has a meeting at 11:45 with an investment group, lunch with Kouga, then he's free for the entire afternoon to catch up on paperwork."

"The meeting with the investment group, is it... important?" She quirked her lips, "I mean, obviously it's important but, er-"

Mura smiled knowingly, "I can push the meeting with the investment group to three and cancel his lunch with Kouga."

Rin's eyes brightened, "Can you really?" She clasped her hands, "Oh, thank you!" She scooped down to pick up her box, "Don't tell him that it's me. Just tell him it's a last minute meeting with some important client. I'll finish up the flowers on this floor and then," she hugged the box to her chest, "I don't know, I didn't think it all the way through yet, but thanks!"

"Of course miss," the secretary bowed her head, "Good luck."

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru's lips quirked as he stepped into the elevator, the familiar scent of Rin's perfume lingering in the metal compartment. <em>She was here. <em>

"Kami," Kouga muttered, fingering the flower arrangement that hung off the wall, "The girls really outdid themselves this time." He glanced over at Sesshomaru, "Did you even know we had vases in the elevator?"

"No." Sesshomaru stepped out of the elevator as the doors opened, "But yet, I'm not entirely surprised." He nodded his head, "I'll see you later."

Kouga fished out his phone as it buzzed, grinning as he read through the email, "Yeah, _later_. Have fun," he answered cryptically, "But remember, this is a place for working." He snickered as he walked down the opposite hall to his office.

"Good morning Takahashi-sama," Sesshomaru's secretary rushed over to greet him, taking his coat. "Did your meeting with Mr. Han go well?"

"Indeed." Sesshomaru's gaze flickered to the tall glass vases that stood on either side of the secretary's desk, filled with tall yellow tulips. "My wife was here I take it?"

"Hai, she dropped by this morning and decorated the entire building." She beamed, handing him his phone messages, "They're beautiful, aren't they?"

"Hn." He quickly scanned through the messages, "Is she still here?"

"No, she left twenty minutes ago." The secretary lied smoothly, "But she did insist that I inform you to be home by 7. She says that she will have a surprise for you."

His brow raised, "Does she?" His amber eyes darkened, "I look forward to it." He began to walk towards the office, the secretary scampering after him.

"Oh wait! Sir, I forgot to inform you, but the Jiujena Group has been rescheduled to this afternoon to permit an emergency meeting with a potential investor."

His stride stopped, his figure both imposing and breathtaking as he turned to face her, "And you are just informing me of this matter now?"

Mura's eyes widened, "It-it just happened before you came in sir. I'm terribly sorry. I was just about to send you an email but I-"

"Enough." He held his hand up, "You are capable of handling your job, Mura, your mistakes infrequent. I'll dismiss this oversight."

"Thank you sir," she bowed her head, gesturing to the other hallway, "Your investor is waiting for you in the conference room. He'd like to speak with you about our new hotel project."

He sighed, briefly thinking to the call to his wife he had been planning to make. He frowned as he ran his hand over his head, "Very well." He soon made his way to the conference room, pausing by the doors._ That scent was still here_, he thought, his eyes narrowing in intrigue. The corners of his lips lifted as he opened the doors, his amber eyes finding the very woman he had spent the entire morning thinking of sitting in the centre of the room. The long table that had once monopolized much of the space had miraculously disappeared, leaving her with a white blanket, a basket and a vase of purple flowers.

"The investor, I take it?" His baritone was smooth, echoing in the empty room.

Rin smiled, "Mmhmm," she replied as she moved onto her feet. They were bare, her toes freshly painted as she walked over to him. _She still danced_, he thought, closing the door behind him and locking it with a flick of his wrist.

"Did you miss me?" He asked, his hand wrapping around her small waist.

Rin giggled as they swayed, "No, I was just thinking of investing in real estate," she added playfully, her small hands toying with the lapels of his suit, "They told me you were the best, so here I am."

He smirked, "They did not lie. I am indeed the best." He bent his head down, placing a kiss on her soft lips. He inhaled her scent, flowers and honey, the smell intoxicating to his senses. "Tell me," he murmured, his voice damp with desire, "Tell me that you missed me."

She giggled, "You're so needy," she chided gently with a teasing smile on her lips, "How could I have missed you when it's only been a few hours?"

He growled, nipping her lips, "So says the woman who hijacked my appointments to seduce her husband."

Rin peeled back in laughter, the sounds like the bells of the fay. "I didn't come here to seduce you," she told him, her hands resting on the small round of her hips.

"No?"

"Nope, I came here to have an innocent," she gave him a look, "Surprise brunch with you." She took his hand and led him to the blanket, patting the spot next to her as she sat down. She grinned as she watched him take off his blazer and loosen the cuffs of his shirt. She moved onto her knees and leaned forward to take off his tie, meeting his gaze as he spoke.

"You're undressing me," he murmured, clasping her hand, "Are you certain you're not trying to seduce me?"

She laughed lightly, "Honestly, would I have worn this," she gestured to her outfit, a cutoff overall dress overtop navy tights and a white sweater, "To seduce my incredibly sexy husband?"

He smirked as he leaned back, admiring her form, his hand moving to play with the long tendrils of her hair. "I quite enjoy the girl next-door look."

She shook her head, "You're impossible," she whispered as his hand cupped her cheek, her small hands wrapping around his as she moved her head to the side and kissed his warm skin.

"And you're beautiful," he replied, moving towards her. "Impossibly beautiful." His fingers lingered over her porcelain visage, "My nymph." He laid his forehead against hers, looking deeply into her brown eyes, "Happy anniversary."

Rin felt her insides turn into mush, her eyes brimming with tears. _He remembered_, she thought, her hands tightening around his hand for a moment_._ "Maru," she could only whisper, overwhelmed by her emotions. _He always knew what to say._ "Happy anniversary," she laughed as his thumbs wiped away her tears. "I love you," she sniffed, "I- I still can't believe you're still here." She murmured, "That you're mine."

"I am eternally yours," he replied, his large hands stroking the curve of her back. "I have a gift for you," he told her, "I think you'll enjoy it."

Her brown eyes shone, pulling back, "Really? You shouldn't have," she murmured before he took her lips in a brief, passion-filled kiss. She was breathless when they parted, her hands fisted into his shirt. "You spoil me," she told him as he pressed a kiss to her ring finger.

He chuckled as he looked up into her brown eyes, "Perhaps I simply enjoy how you thank me."

She giggled, her eyes trailing over his face, from his angled cheekbones before lingering on his amber gaze, "What did you get me this time?" She clapped her hands together, "Another puppy?"

He smirked, "You will have to wait for tonight."

She pouted, her shoulders faltering, "Fine."

_Enchanting, _he thought, mesmerized by her presence. _Did she know how beguiling she looked when she pouted like that?_ It was almost enough for him to cave in and hand her gift to her now. Sesshomaru laughed as he took her lips again, this kiss playful, light.

Rin grinned in response, moving with him as his back fell to the ground and she straddled his waist. _This was such a happy kiss, _she thought, giggling as he tried to pull off her overalls.

He groaned as they parted once more, "Honestly," he muttered, tugging on the straps, "You wear these things because you know I can't undo them."

She bit her lip, "I thought you liked the girl next door look," she joked, an impish grin donning her lips, "Besides," she kissed his cheek, nudging him over so she could curl into his side, "I didn't come here to seduce you."

"No?" He moved onto his side and wrapped his arm around her, "For I think my boss would be fine with an impromptu office romp."

She bit her lip to stop herself from grinning, "Stop being so..."

"Charming?"

"Yes." She pecked his cheek and moved up to a sitting position, "I came here to surprise you with a picnic," she told him, shyly holding a basket. "I-we used to do these all the time when we were dating." She grabbed the basket and placed it on her lap, lifting the wicker flap to reveal a fluffy ball. "And now, we can have a _wholesome_ family brunch." She cooed as she scooped Ah-Un from the basket, the puppy wagging his tail eagerly at the sight of his two masters.

"Of course," Sesshomaru sighed as he moved up and scratched behind the dog's ears, "I'm beginning to become jealous of this mongrel."

"Don't listen to daddy," she murmured into the puppy's ears, cradling it to her bosom, "He loves you very much."

"Woof!" Ah-Un replied earnestly, wiggling out of Rin's hold and jumped onto Sesshomaru's lap.

"See?" Rin grinned, "He likes you just as much."

"Hn." He glanced up at Rin who was watching him interact with the small pup, her hand absentmindedly resting on her abdomen. _A family picnic. _Something caught in his throat as he looked away, _she would have still been pregnant today. _

"Do you remember the first time we did this?" Rin asked, breaking his train of thought. She played with the tattered ends of the white blanket. "I surprised you with a picnic, while we were dating."

He raised a brow, "And you wore that, I presume?"

She giggled, "No, I actually put a lot more thought into that outfit." She blushed, "You know, it would take me hours trying to figure out what I should wear, how my hair should look, what make up to put on." She shrugged, "And I always ended up wearing the first thing in my hand because I would be running late, with my hair down because everything else looked awful. You just made me so nervous that I tried so hard to look perfect for you."

"Hn," Sesshomaru smirked, "I made you nervous?"

"Incredibly," she replied honestly, "You still do." Her fingers toyed with her wedding ring, "But now," she grinned up at him, "I don't care as much about what I should wear because I already have you forever."

He chuckled, "Indeed," he took her hand and kissed her ring. "Do you know when you looked most beautiful?" He asked, the sides of his mouth lifting at the sight of Ah-Un asleep on his lap. "The day I asked you to be my wife."

Rin blinked, "You remember that?" She asked, her heart squeezing in delight.

"I do. You wore yet another dress," he took her hand, playing with the engagement ring he had given her that day. "You wore no make up, your hair was wet-"

Rin made a noise, "I probably looked like a drowned rat."

"The most beautiful drowned rat, then." He smirked, "Your cheeks were red from the cold, but your eyes were most enchanting that night." He then smiled, remembering that night. He remembered kissing Rin's shoulder as he brought her out of the water, tasting her sweet skin that held a trace of the salt from the ocean, his feet sinking into the white sand as he reached the towels that were laid out. He remembered their bantering, their quips playful and endearing. And then he remembered how she had looked when she read the note, her brown eyes so large and expressive, her cheeks red from the cool night, her hair curled from the ocean. She had such an ethereal beauty, small, so fragile, and she was his.

"You're sweet talking me, aren't you?" She teased, her fingers running down his chest, "Because it's working."

He smirked and took her lips, "You're beautiful, my Rin."

She laughed, resting her forehead against his shoulder, "I have another surprise for you tonight."

"Another?" He jested, "You're courting me, aren't you?"

She giggled, "Yes. Be home tonight by seven, ok?"

"I promise," he held up his pinky, curling it around hers.

_Pinky swear, _Rin thought, memorizing every detail of the moment. The way he looked, so handsome in his grey suit, how the scar on his face was faded now, the way his warm amber eyes held her gaze. She adored his smile, her fingers lifting to trace his lips, "I love you," she told him, just as she did everyday they were together. And he kissed her ring, just as he did every time she said those three words.

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin hummed to herself as she walked downtown, her mood impossibly jovial since her surprise brunch with her husband. She paused as a shop caught her attention, her eyes moving to an elegant purple dress hanging in the window. <em>His favorite color, <em>she thought, walking into the store.

"Hello," an attendant rushed towards her, "Mrs. Takahashi!" She exclaimed in recognition and quickly bowed, "Is there anything I can get for you?"

Rin blushed at the attention, _she would never really get used to being called Mrs. Takahashi. _She giggled, _it made her sound so much more important. _"Ah yes," she pointed to the window, "That dress, could I try it on?"

"Of course!"

In a matter of moments Rin was standing in the private dressing room; the purple gown was in a soft lilac, made of cascading silk and with a sweetheart neckline. The waist was trimmed with lace and pearls, the effect breathtakingly romantic. "It's perfect," Rin murmured, running her fingers over the skirt of the dress.

"You wear it exquisitely," the attendant replied, lifting the train off from the hardwood floor, "We only need to remove a couple of inches to make it a perfect fit at the bottom."

Rin nodded her head, "Yes, that would be wonderful, thank you."

"Of course," she knelt down and began to pin the dress, "So is this for a particularly special occasion Mrs. Takahashi?"

"Rin," she told her, "Please just call me Rin," she laughed lightly, "Mrs. Takahashi is my mother-in-law."

"Yes miss."

"And yes, it's for something special." She couldn't stop the silly grin from donning her youthful visage, "The dress is for tonight, it's our anniversary."

The attendant glanced up from the dress and met Rin's gaze in the mirror, she noted how her brown eyes sparkled, "Congratulations," she exclaimed sincerely, "You are a perfect fit for Mr. Takahashi."

Rin blushed again, "Thank you."

The attendant stepped back and bowed, "Of course. I'll leave you to change."

"Great, thank you." Rin let out a deep breath as she took one more look at herself in the grand mirror, prodding her cheeks with her finger. The glow to her skin had returned, her eyes were bright, jubilant, her figure much healthier and toned. _She looked... pretty. _She grinned, _pretty enough for people to believe that someone like him could ever be with her. _

After she changed into her clothes she met the attendant at the register, sifting through her purse for her wallet. "Here it is," she laughed, "Finally." She handed the woman her black card and smiled, "Do you also have ties here? I'd like to get one for my husband."

"Yes, of course," the woman pointed to the glass countertop to the left, "We had a new shipment this morning so you're in luck."

"Great! I'll just take a look."

"Of course Ms. Rin, I'll ring you in."

"Thank you," Rin smiled before she moved towards the glass counter, her eyes searching over the silk fabrics for something that would match her dress. _Maybe that one? _She wondered, grinning at the thought of them matching. _How lame, _she giggled to herself, _but cute, so cute! _

"Well, well," that cool, silky voice traveled down Rin's spine, "Isn't it the _current_ Mrs. Takahashi."

Rin froze, her body suddenly heavy as she turned to face the woman, "N-Nastsumi," she stuttered, urging herself to control her emotions. _Her, _she thought, her small hands tightening into fists.

"Hm," Natsumi raised a brow, a smirk appearing on her bright red lips as she looked over the younger woman. "Your taste in fashion is truly... fascinating."

Rin felt her piercing black eyes trail up and down her body, cursing herself for wearing overalls. "I... I just got off work," she replied lamely, tugging her rolled up sleeves of her white sweater loose.

"Ah! The flower shop," Natsumi mocked enthusiasm, her tone condescending. "So why is it that you're in this boutique? Spending your husband's money while you can, hm?"

Rin's eyes flitted with anger, "Isn't that what you're doing here? Last time I checked, you didn't have a job."

Natsumi laughed, running her long, red fingernails over her elegant throat, "My, my, your backbone is showing. It's a shame then, really, for you still seem deluded into thinking you're in a happy marriage."

Rin felt the words cut through her like knives, her mind struggling to come up with a retort but she remained speechless. "I-"

"Word is, he's grown tired of you." Natsumi smirked, "And let me guess," she tapped her chin, "You're hiding behind your flowers and pretty dresses trying to rekindle your romance." She snorted in derision, "Well let me be the first to tell you, it won't work."

Rin felt cold, doubt began to fill her every being. "You're lying," she finally replied, her voice shaky. "We're happy."

Her perfectly arched brows lifted, "Oh," the older woman's voice filled with sympathy, "You truly believe it, don't you?" Her voice was sickly sweet, laced with condescension, "When he tells you that you're beautiful? That he's yours and _only_ yours?" She shook her head, "Darling, I think it's time you wake up from your little fantasy and grow up. He's not your prince charming, he's Sesshomaru Takahashi." Natsumi's gaze darkened, flashing with the delight of twisting Rin's heart. "One of the most wanted men in Tokyo."

She moved to the glass case, her red nails moving over the cabinet, "Tell me, do you know why he married you?" She answered before Rin could, "Because you gave him an edge over his competitors. Finally, a true Tokyo Cinderella story, ne? The little orphan girl who snags the handsome, wealthy businessman? It helped rocket the Takahashi name to every household in East Asia. Everyone knows the story of how you charmed him with your innocence, your beguiling looks. But it was too easy, don't you think? Always a little too good to be true, wasn't it?"

Rin trembled, her hand shaking, "Stop-"

Natsumi took a step forward, her voice lowering, "Wake up from your pathetic little fantasy. It's just pitiful to see someone like you bring down the Takahashi name." She took Rin's hand and laughed at the ring, "A flower for the florist, how tacky."

Rin frowned and ripped her hand from hers, "Natsumi, I-"

"Is his favorite position still from behind?" Natsumi interjected, enjoying the look on Rin's face, "You know, when he does that thing where he turns you around and just," she purred, her long lashes covering her dark eyes, "Has his way with you?"

Rin felt numb, her wide eyes filing with tears, _he had been with Natsumi too? All those women, Kagura, the intern, Natsumi, tall, breathtakingly gorgeous. How she paled in comparison. _

Natsumi sneered, "You really thought he was faithful, didn't you? I'm sorry to say but I'm not the first person to have been graced with your husband's talents, nor will I be the last." She leaned in, "Like that intern?" She smirked as the color in Rin's cheeks paled, "In fact, why don't you ask your darling husband what happened in Hong Kong."

"Wh-what?" Rin trembled, taking a step back, "You're lying," she whispered, "He's... he wouldn't."

Natsumi lips parted, mocking surprise, "No?"

"Um, excuse me?" The store clerk stepped forward, her voice timid as she walked in between the two women, "Mrs. Takahashi? Your card has been canceled." She held up the black credit card, which had been cut into two halves. "I'm sorry ma'am, store policy."

Rin gasped as the clerk dropped the pieces into her hands, grasping the plastic as her head clouded with information. _It was like she was in a daze. _She looked up at Natsumi, _a nightmare. _

Natsumi tsked, "I guess your husband's not happy that you're spending all his money? Perhaps you're not thanking him correctly? If I remember... he has that spot, doesn't he? Behind his ear. It makes him... _melt_." She tilted her head, a grin donning her perfectly shaped lips. She watched as Rin cringed, "Well," she brushed her hands over the front of her skin-tight dress, "I've got a date to attend. Take care of yourself," she looked at the card in the younger woman's hand and laughed, "And better care of your husband. You don't want him to stray again... ne?"

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Rin felt numb as she walked out of the store, her hand resting on the brick as she took a moment to breathe.<p>

_Hong Kong? _

That had been a business trip he had taken just a few weeks after he found out she was pregnant. He had refused to let her come, insisting that the flight would be harmful to their child's health.

_Or so he said. _

She cringed, thinking back to the last few weeks, how perfect everything had been, how happy they had been. _Was he lying again? Using her until the contract ended? Maybe he thought that pretending to be with her, to make her happy, would make it easier. To make their relationship more believable to the public, to Murasaki? _She whimpered at the thought, of being used again. Her heart felt like it was crumpling, _was she being that naive little girl again? _

_And then the intern. With her gorgeous red hair and model body. She had walked in on them. Watched in horror as that woman pleasured her husband... _Her hands clenched into fists at the memory, _but he had claimed that he wasn't himself. And he wasn't. He hadn't been her Maru then. _

She let out a deep breath as she fumbled in her purse and found her phone, quickly dialing her voicemail and pressed in her password. Her fingers were shaking as she selected a message, holding her phone to her ear as she closed her eyes.

"Rin," his rich baritone came through, his tone calming, "Since it's three in the afternoon in Tokyo and you didn't answer your phone, I take it that you're napping." He chuckled, "Which is for the best, Inuyasha said it was good for you to sleep when you're tired. Anyways, I sent you something from Hong Kong, I think you'll enjoy it - but don't eat it all at once." She could almost picture his smirk, "Rest. Stay hydrated. Call me when you receive your gift, and... I miss you." The phone beeped, the automated voice telling her that the message ended.

Rin's hand fell to her side, her phone still clutched in her small hand. _I miss you. _His voice echoed in her mind, _had he really? _She looked down at her rings, her thoughts muddling together. _My Maru, _she thought, _was she doubting him again? _

She closed her eyes, struggling to keep her composure, to not break down and cry as she walked back to the flower shop. "Hi," she greeted softly as she spotted Ayame in the front, picking flowers to assemble a large bouquet.

"Hey," Ayame turned to face her, "Did you see how fantastic these tulips turned out?" Her smile fell as she saw the sad look on her face, "Oh Rin, what did that jerk do this time?" She asked as she moved up from her knees and embraced her friend.

Rin laid her head against Ayame's shoulder, "It wasn't him. I think. I... Do you remember Natsumi Mori?"

Ayame pursed her lips, "You mean that botoxed bitch who called you a pitiful little girl? Yeah, I remember her," she glared at the thought, "You ran into her, didn't you?"

Rin sighed, "Yeah." She moved out of Ayame's embrace and leant against the tables, "I know I shouldn't let her get to me, but she does. She knows exactly where to strike," she gave a bitter laugh, "She says that he's cheating on me. That I'm blind, playing the pathetic little housewife card. And I know I shouldn't fall for it, but I can't help but wonder... what if she's not lying? What if he is unfaithful?" Her heart clenched, a single tear falling down her porcelain cheeks, "What if right now, he's lying to me again?"

"Oh Rin," Ayame took her hand, "Listen to me. I know it's not perfect, and I can't promise you it will ever be the same again, but there will always be women like Natsumi Mori around. There will always be someone waiting on the sidelines, eager to latch onto any sliver of your husband. Come on, let's talk in the office." She took Rin's hand and led her to the back room, sitting next to her on the small white couch.

"You know," Ayame laid her hands on her lap, "Kouga's mother gave me advice before our wedding, about how to handle other women like her. She told me to always trust your husband, and never, ever trust those other women. They'll feign friendships, throw insults wrapped in Chanel and break you down until you want to cry, but you can't let them. Because they're jealous of what you have. And they're willing to do almost anything to attain it." She looked into Rin's eyes, "I know you love him Rin, but do you trust your husband?"

Rin's mouth opened, hesitating as the image of Sesshomaru with another woman flash in her thoughts. _Do I trust him? _Her heart was heavy, "Yes," she replied softly, timidly.

Ayame frowned, catching that hesitation, "Ok." She noted the dullness in her eyes, the paleness of her cheeks. But she couldn't fight this battle for Rin, couldn't make everything better despite how much she wish she could. _She still needed time to heal._ She moistened her lips as she thought, _to trust him again. _

"Hey," she handed Rin a cookie from the small container of the coffee table, "So are you excited for tonight?"

Rin blinked, thankful for the distraction as her thoughts shifted to the topic at hand, "Oh, yes." She smiled as she took a bite, "I'm taking him to the rooftop of our condo. I hired Jak's event planner friend so I don't have to worry about everything... too much." She laughed lightly, "It's going to be pretty and romantic, with candles, lights and white drapes and..." She trailed off and met Ayame's amused gaze, "It's going to be awesome," she closed her eyes, urging composure. "Anyways, enough chit chat," she forced a smile on her face, "Let's get back to work!"She stood up and helped Ayame up, determined not to let Natsumi's petty words get to her.

_I love him, with all that I have, _she thought fleetingly as she sketched out a layout of a birthday party for the following day. Her gaze fell to her wedding rings, thinking back to the impromptu picnic she had with Sesshomaru. It had been so utterly perfect, the laughter, the kisses, the warm fuzzy feelings returning at the mere thought of him.

_But do I trust him?_

Her stomach twisted at the conflicting halves of herself. The part that had once trusted and loved so implicitly being overcome by that part of her that doubted. The part that questioned his motives, his words, his touches. That self-doubt, her insecurities, her fears that had once been overcome were manifesting in her every thought.

Her lips parted as she gasped for air, it was like her chest was heavy. Soon breathing became difficult as she clutched the table for support.

"I'm going to go water the plants," Rin murmured to Ayame as she moved to the greenhouse, locking the door behind her as she hid behind the brick walls.

She fell to the floor, feelings of defeat creeping up her. Her body felt cold, tears welling up as she curled her knees to her chest. "God Rin, don't cry," she muttered bitterly, wiping her eyes with the sleeves of her white shirt. "Don't let her get to you," she whispered to herself, "Don't let her win." She sniffed, "Because he's yours." A ragged breath escaped her, "He's still yours."

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru was silent as he moved through the house, soon ending up in their bedroom. He glanced in the open closet doors, "There you are," he said as he found his wife sitting in front of the large vanity.<p>

Rin jumped at the sound of his voice, her brown eyes widening as she turned her head, "Sesshomaru! Is it already seven?" She cursed as she bounced up from her seat and ran to grab a dress, "Oh no, I'm sorry, I'm always late. I guess I was just distracted-"

He chuckled, walking towards her as he placed his hand on her arm, bringing her to his side, "It's six thirty," he told her as he pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I'm early," His long fingers lingered on her sides. "I came home to shower," a wolfish grin slowly appeared on his face, "If you'd like to join?"

She relaxed, letting out a breath she had not realized she had been holding in. With a giggle, "No, we'll definitely be late if I join you."

He kissed her neck, "But I have this spot," he murmured playfully, "On my back that I can't reach without you."

She snorted and slipped out of his embrace, "Go wash up mister," she waggled her finger, "You can't have a piece of this until later tonight."

He sighed dramatically, "Very well." His fingers moved to his neck as he began to unbutton his shirt, the cotton falling to the hardwood floor. He smirked as he caught Rin's gaze on his form, "Are you certain you wouldn't like to join?"

Rin blushed and turned away, "Very," she mumbled, "Go shower!" She exclaimed with a laugh, returning to the vanity to apply her makeup. Her fingers fumbled in the drawer for her watch, sighing as she caught the time. She had spent over an hour just staring at herself in the mirror, an hour reliving those harsh words.

_Pathetic little fantasy. _

She winced, placing the mascara back onto the countertop as she took a moment to calm herself. _Don't let her get to you, _she repeated like a mantra as she applied her makeup. _Because he's yours. And she's just jealous, _she swallowed nervously,_ right? _

Fifteen minutes later she had finished with her makeup and had put on the dress from the store. Her hands ran over the lilac fabric, thinking back to how her credit card had been canceled. Thankfully she had her bank card with her, "Probably just a fluke," she mused, turning her head as she heard the pattering of paws against the hardwood floor. She grinned as Ah-Un bounded into the closet, "All done supper, huh?" She cooed, picking him up from the ground. "You're getting so big! At this rate, I might not even be able to hold you one day."

Ah-Un woofed in response, his tongue wagging happily as she spoke to him.

"Rin?" Sesshomaru glanced in the closet, a charcoal colored suit now donning his athletic form, "Are you still getting ready?"

"I'm done!" She exclaimed, Ah-Un still in her arms as she walked towards him, "He wanted to say goodbye," she murmured, pressing a kiss to the top of the puppy's head.

He chuckled fondly at the pair, holding his hand out for her to take. "You're breathtaking," he told her, admiring her delicate form encased in silk and pearls. "As are you," he told their dog as he took him from Rin's hands and set him onto the bedroom floor.

She grinned, her fingers brushing against his neck, "You're pretty handsome, I guess," she replied teasingly, glancing down at their pup who was watching them with eager black eyes. "Look how happy he is, he thinks he's coming with us again." She giggled, "I feel bad now, for leaving him alone."

"Hn," Sesshomaru bent down and pointed to the small dog bed near the fireplace, "Bed." He ordered, the pup yipping before happily jumping into the comfortable cushion.

Rin laughed in amazement, "How do you do that?" She asked, her hands laying on his chest.

"I'm amazing," he retorted smugly, pressing a kiss to her cheek. "Shall we go?"

"Yes, just one second," Rin said as she tugged off his black tie and set it on their bed.

His brows lifted, "You have a habit of taking off my ties," he murmured, watching as Rin pulled out another tie from a bag lying on a nightstand.

"Happy anniversary," she smiled, tying it around his neck with careful precision. Amber eyes were cool as they observed Rin's nimble fingers pull and tug the purple silk, smirking as a light blush appeared on her cheeks. _She always blushed, _he observed, resisting the urge to take her into his arms and ravish her.

"Now we match," she exclaimed, stepping back to admire how handsome he looked. _How handsome he always looked. Almost... unattainable. _Her smile faltered as she remembered meeting Natsumi, how she had insulted her and their marriage.

_Pathetic little fantasy. _

She felt weak suddenly, her hands shaking as they fell from his neck, _don't let her get to you Rin. _

"Um-," she stuttered, clearing her throat. "So we should go," she hooked her arm through his, hoping he did not catch her brief shift in mood, but he was far too observant to not have noticed.

"Something is bothering you." He murmured as his hand found her waist, bringing her into his embrace.

"It's nothing," she replied airily, "Hormones. Just me being overly silly-"

"Rin." His tone was soft yet demanding, urging her to answer.

She sighed as her thin shoulders fell, "It's stupid."

"Rin."

"Fine..." Her gaze fell to the dark wood floor, "It's nothing big. I've just been thinking lately, you know. If we had met three years ago," _if you were who you were the moment you woke up from the accident, _"Would you have tried to date me?" She trailed off, her eyes catching his. They were burning honey, flecks of emotion flickering forward. _Would you have even looked at someone like me?_

"Do you want my honest answer?" He returned after a moment, stepping forward. He watched as she nodded, "Very well." His gaze lifted to hers, brooding with emotion. "Three years ago, no. I wouldn't have thought twice of you." _How he despised his former self. For that was not the man he wanted to be. _"You weren't my type."

Rin's form trembled, a gasp escaping her lips before she caught herself, "I see." It felt like a kick to her gut, _not his type._ She turned quickly on her heel, exhaling sharply. "I need to get my bag," she whispered, rushing into the closet for her clutch.

_Not his type. _

Sesshomaru stopped her as she grabbed her clutch, maneuvering her to stand in front of the long mirror in the closet. "Rin, understand this. You would have been far too young for my tastes, only 21. You would have been poorly dressed, astonishingly naive, with a heart far too easily broken. You would have screamed fragility, virtue, innocence." His words cut like knives, her hand folding in front of her stomach. "But I would have been a fool to pass up such beauty." His fingers found her soft curves, "And I? I would have been equally as foolish. Arrogant, self-righteous, distant. An asshole, really." He looked at their reflection, their dichotomy easily apparent. She was so soft, so small, still so innocent. He stood over her, his form angled and hard. He was guarded, jaded, and cold.

And yet they fit so perfectly.

"But one year later, I met you. I was different then. Still reserved. Still incapable of portraying my emotions, but then I met you. I didn't have to think twice about you, did I? How could I when you already consumed my thoughts in a matter of moments? You enchanted me, still enchant me." He turned her so they faced each other, mesmerized by her brown eyes.

Rin struggled to blink back her tears, her worries disappearing as he spoke. Because right now, it was just her and Sesshomaru. "You-you're making me cry," she joked, embracing his strong chest, "I'm sorry," she wiped her eyes, trembling with his touches, "I'm such a wreck these days. It's like I have this pathetic complex where I need validation from you every day and I know it's pitiful, it's really stupid but I... I just-"

"I'll tell you everyday as long as I live how beautiful you are," he murmured, silencing her ramblings with a slow, passionate kiss. "How you are my everything." He held her delicate face in his hands, looking into her brown eyes, "My soul."

Rin felt herself melt, her fears, her inhibitions gone at his words. "Maru, I love you," she murmured, wrapping her arms around his neck, "Forever."

"Forever." He echoed as they pulled apart, placing a kiss on her rings. "I adore you Rin."

Her head tilted to the side as she watched him kiss her rings, her eyes falling onto the expensive timepiece on his wrist. "Oh no, is it seven? We need to go," she laughed as her hands tilted his wrist upright so she could read the watch, "We're so going to be late."

He smirked, his hand running down her soft curves, "We could be later," he murmured suggestively, "Much, much later."

She swatted his hands away, bending down briefly to kiss Ah-Un's nose, "Come on husband," she grinned as she took his hand, "It's time for you to be swept off your feet."

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>After an evening of champagne and desserts, they stood under the white canopy, fairy lights placed around the edges of the rooftop. "You've certainly outdone yourself," Sesshomaru murmured, his hand holding Rin's as they looked over the Tokyo skyline.<p>

Rin grinned, "I impressed you, huh?" She glanced over at him, "So now, where's my present?" She teased, resting her head against his arm.

He chuckled, wrapping his arm around her, "You are spoiled." He murmured as placed his lips upon hers, tasting her rose-painted mouth. "But I suppose that's my fault." He laced his fingers through hers as he led her to the large white chair set up near the bonfire.

Rin curled her legs around his as they sat on the chair, her form molded against his. She shifted closer for warmth, her hands cupped together.

Sesshomaru brought a velvet box from his jacket pocket and placed it into her small hands. "Happy anniversary," he spoke softly, his eyes watching as Rin lifted the top.

Rin gasped at the sight, her fingers trailing over the diamonds. The ring was made of diamonds in triads, creating a brilliant and harmonious band. "Oh, Sesshomaru," she let out a shaky laugh as she felt tears slide down her cheek, "It's so gorgeous." The ring was unexpected, "I didn't think you'd get me something like this." She sniffed, "All I got you was a tie and this," she cried, "Oh, thank you."

"Hm," Sesshomaru chuckled as he took the ring from the box and placed it in her palm. "It's a ring to celebrate our first anniversary," he told her, "The jeweler calls it a celebration ring, but I'd like you to consider it a second wedding band."

"A wedding band?"

"Yes." He sighed, his voice full of emotion, his heart heaving with guilt. "Rin, I realized recently... that I broke my wedding vows to you."

She was stunned by his statement, her brown eyes taking in the expression of his face. His eyes were stormy, his lips thin as he spoke. "Sesshomaru," Rin leant up to kiss his cheek, wishing to ease his guilt, "It's ok." She murmured, her voice soft, dulcet, "I've already forgiven you."

"I know," he returned, _she forgave so easily, but could she forget? _"So I give you this ring as a new start, a new promise." He slowly smiled, losing himself in her beautiful brown eyes, "My Rin, will you take this fool of a man as your husband once more?"

She nodded, biting her lips to urge herself not to cry, "Always and forever." She replied, her hands resting on his. She laughed as he wiped her tears, "I'll always be yours," she told him, her lips quivering, her eyes damp. "Because I never want to be without you."

"As I will always be yours," he told her, his fingers finding the wedding bands on her hands. He placed a kiss on the engagement ring before he slipped it off, "Have you ever looked at your ring?" He asked, placing it in Rin's palm next to her new diamond band.

Her brows furrowed, "Of course I have, all the time. It's beautiful."

"But I've never told you the story behind it, have I?" He asked, beginning his tale, "I had it commissioned eight months after our first date. That day, I had just arrived back to Tokyo from a meeting in Singapore and you were waiting for me on the tarmac with a bouquet of purple flowers."

"Forget-me-nots," Rin whispered, her eyes watering. "I couldn't come empty handed."

He smirked, "Indeed." His fingertips ran over her cheeks, "When you greeted me, you said 'Welcome home'. Two words that made me put my life in perspective. Before you, marriage was nothing but a way to enhance the Takahashi name. It was never about starting a life, a family. But with you, I wanted you as my wife. The mother to my children." He placed a soft, lingering kiss on her lips, "You saved me Rin, from a life full of regret."

Rin blinked back tears, her voice cracking, "Sesshomaru-"

"Adeo ne hominem immutare ex amore, ut non cognoscas eundem esse?" He murmured as he toyed with the outline of the ring, looking deeply into her eyes, "Is it possible that a man can be so changed by love, that you could not recognize him to be the same?" The corners of his lips curled, "You had changed me, my Rin, bewitched me into a different man. One capable of compassion, honesty... and love." _He was ready now. Capable of expressing how he truly felt._

Her head tilted up at the word, _love. _Her heart stopped, "Love?" She asked as a single tear went down her cheek, for the last time he had told her that he loved her, it had been a lie. She remembered that moment so vividly, her heart clenching at the memory.

_Lie to me, _she had pleaded that evening, her chest heavy, begging to hear those words that he had never said. _Lie to me. _She had been so devastated, so broken, torn from her heart-aching love she had for him.

Her lips quivered, "You never said it," she whispered, "You never told me that you loved me."

He nodded, "I know... and I'm sorry." He swallowed, taking a moment to clear his thoughts. "Amor meus amplio quam verba est," he murmured, taking the engagement ring from her palm as he took her fingertip and passed it along the inside of the band. She shivered as she felt the engravings, her heart melting at his words, "It means my love is more than words."

Rin glanced up, her eyes wide with wonderment, "What?"

"Every moment I kissed your ring, it was my way of expressing my true feelings for you. Rin, I was a coward, a fool, for never telling you how I truly felt." His thumb grazed over her lips, memorizing this moment. _For he would always remember this. He would fight to remember this. _The way her eyes glittered in the moonlight, her rosy cheeks, her rose-stained lips.

_She was so beautiful. _

His voice was warm, husky, and rich with emotion as he spoke, "I love you."

She was speechless, her heart stopping for that single, beautiful moment. Her lips moved, though not a sound escaping, _he loves me. _"Am I dreaming?" She asked finally as her voice broke, her eyes watering, "Because if it is, I never want to wake up."

He chuckled, their hands finding each other, her rings falling onto her lap. "You're not dreaming."

She sniffed, her eyes closing, "Say it again," she whispered, "I just, I want to hear you say it again."

"I love you," he repeated, "For eternity. My heart is yours Rin, never forget that."

Her hands squeezed his tight, "I-I think you need to pinch me," she murmured, "Because I must be dreaming, you've only said that in my dreams."

"I love you," he told her as his hand entangled in her long hair as his lips descended upon hers, "My Rin. My beautiful Rin." He murmured between kisses, "I will never forget you."

"I love you too." She exclaimed in a hushed whisper, still dazed from his words. _I love you too, _she thought, her fingers curling into his shoulder, "I never thought I'd get to say that," she whimpered as she wrapped her arms around him, "Or to ever hear you tell me that you love me."

"I'm sorry I've been too much of a coward to ever tell you."

Rin knelt onto her knees and cupped his cheeks, "It's ok." She grinned, "Because you've always been telling me, haven't you?" she held her engagement ring up, "In your own way." _Akemi was right. He had always loved her. _Her grin grew wider, _their love wasn't one-sided. _

"Indeed," Sesshomaru slipped the engagement ring back onto her finger and then the new diamond band. "No more cryptic messages this time, I promise you this," he told her with a smirk.

Rin nodded her head, "I don't think you'll ever be able to top this." She murmured, pressing her lips briefly against his.

He laughed, "I have the rest of our lives to try." He gently nudged her to lay on her back, his form hovering over hers as he pressed his lips to hers. She mewled in delight, relishing in his touch. Rin closed her eyes, her heart beating a thousand times as they kissed. Her toes curled, a silly grin donning her face.

_In this moment, she was so incredibly happy. _Her body melted at his touch, _because he loves me. _

"Sesshomaru," she murmured breathily as he pulled away, her hands tugging on his broad shoulders, "Again."

He chuckled now, bringing his head down to hers for one more kiss. "I love you." He told her, this kiss filled with an intense, growing passion. His left hand fisted her curled, midnight hair, his right hand holding her hips down as he rested in between her parted legs. He looked deeply into her brown eyes, mesmerized by the honey colored sparkles, enchanted by her smile, "My Rin, aishiteru."

* * *

><p>.forgetmenot.<p>

* * *

><p>xoxo<p>

tuille


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

by

tuille

* * *

><p>disclaimer: anything you recognize is not mine.<p>

The storm...

* * *

><p>Rin felt nauseous as she sat in the room, the smell of medical grade cleaner causing her stomach to knot. Her palms were sweaty as she clenched the leather seat, her brown eyes darting from the clock to the door.<p>

She jumped as the door opened. "Ah Mrs. Takahashi," Dr. Jinenji bowed as he entered the room, "How have you been faring?"

"Well," she replied timidly, "Thank you."

He pulled his chair so he sat in front of the young woman, "Good." His voice was gentle and soothing, "So let's get straight to it then, shall we?" He opened her file and put on his glasses, his large eyes moving over the yellow page. "And can you tell me again, why you took the blood test Wednesday?"

"Um," she chewed her lip, "Yes, of course. I haven't had my period since... since the miscarriage so I'm wondering if... is it, am I..."

"Pregnant?" He offered, removing his spectacles. He let out a deep sigh, "Well, Mrs. Takahashi, from these results, I'm sorry to inform you that you are not pregnant."

Rin felt like she had been kicked in the chest, "Not pregnant?" She echoed, her eyes glassy with tears.

"I'm sorry." He placed his hand over hers and squeezed them gently, "I understand your desire to conceive but you have to understand that your body is still healing. In fact, according to your blood test, your hormone levels are still unbalanced."

She closed her eyes, "But... when will it get better?" She asked, "When will I be normal?"

Dr. Jinenji bowed his head, "It depends on the person. It could take anywhere from a few months to even a year for your hormone levels to normalize."

Rin whimpered, "A year?"

He nodded his head sympathetically, "All I can urge you to do is stay healthy. Sleep, eat, exercise. You're still young Mrs. Takahashi, your time will come."

"What if I can't?" She asked, "What if it doesn't go back to normal?"

"It will, I assure you." He glanced down as his phone beeped, quickly checking his message. "I'm so sorry but an emergency client has arrived. Please feel free to call if you have any more questions." He stood up and bowed deep, "I wish you all the best."

Rin gave him a half-hearted smile, "Thank you." She crossed her arms in front of her belly, her mood considerably dampened by the news. For the past few weeks she had been toying with the idea that she could be pregnant. Her cravings for salty foods and pickled items, just like she had been when she was carrying Takehiko. And the pregnancy test she had taken at home earlier that week only confirmed her suspicions. But this news was absolutely devastating. Her hormones were still unbalanced.

Her gaze fell to the ring on her finger, "I'm sorry," she whispered, a single tear falling from her brown eyes.

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru tapped his fingers on the black table as his eyes scanned the restaurant for any sign of his wife. <em>Twenty minutes late, <em>he thought absently, instantly moving to his feet as he spotted her. She was a whirlwind of color, her dress a vibrant rose that ended mid thigh, her heels a bright yellow. Her hands clutched a bouquet of purple tulips as she danced towards him. Her eyes were bright and jubilant, that healthy glow to her skin returned after months of recovery.

"I'm so sorry that I'm late," she murmured, out of breath as she pressed her lips to his chin. "I stopped by the flower market on my way over and I just couldn't help but get these," she lifted the bouquet to his nose, "Aren't they beautiful?" She cooed, beaming as he took an obligatory sniff.

"Hn," he returned, taking her hand as he led her to her seat.

"Aww, you're mad at me, aren't you?" She teased, stroking his arm as she leant up onto her toes and kissed him slowly, seducing him with her soft lips. "There," she smiled, "Feeling better now, grumps?"

He couldn't help but roll his eyes, the sides of his lips lifting as they parted, "I sometimes think I married a child," he retorted, stealing one more kiss before he pulled out her seat for her.

Rin took the napkin from the table and set it on her lap, "And I sometimes think I married a robot." She stuck out her tongue, giggling as he shook his head in exasperation. "Truce?" She asked, her hand reaching over to his. Her fingers danced on his palm, "I really am sorry that I'm late Maru," she babbled, speaking without a thought, "My doctor's appointment was changed this morning to ten thirty and it just set everything back."

He frowned, their fingers entangled, "Your appointment? You didn't mention anything about an appointment."

She stiffened, her gaze diverting from his face to the table. _She hadn't told him on purpose. _"I um..." she swallowed, unknowing whether or not to let him know where she had been. "I..." _but he's your husband Rin, _she reminded herself, chiding her insecurities. "I went to see Dr. Jinenji."

His eyes widened, his breath taken away. "You did?" His thoughts ran, "Are you-?"

"No." Rin's hold on his hand tightened, "I'm not." Her voice broke, "I thought I might be. I haven't had my... you know, for a while and I thought, maybe I was. But I'm not..." She felt her eyes water, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I just... I didn't want to disappoint you."

His gaze softened, "Rin," he murmured, stroking her rings with his thumb, "I could never be disappointed in you."

"I know, I was just being stupid." She closed her eyes as his hand pulled away, jumping as she felt his hands on her shoulders.

"Come," he spoke softly, pulling out her chair and took her hand as they walked out of the restaurant.

"But," she glanced back at the confused waiter who had two glasses of wine in his hands, "But how about lunch?"

"We'll eat in a minute." He led her to the quiet street behind the restaurant, away from prying eyes as he guided her so she rested her back against the stone building. He held her face with one hand as he looked into her brown eyes, "Rin, have I told you today that I love you?"

She could not help but laugh softly, wiping the tears that dripped down her cheeks, "Not since you left for work."

"Hm," he kissed her nose, "Very well then my wife," he told her sincerely, pouring his heart into his words. "I love you."

"I love you too," she whispered as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, "I'm sorry. I just... I wanted to know first." She sniffed as she looked up into his amber gaze, "I thought I was. I really did. I even started to crave things again, like I did when..." _when she was pregnant. _

Sesshomaru pulled her closer into his embrace, "Rin, it's ok." His tone was patient and calm.

She whimpered, her chocolate orbs focusing on his black tie, "But what if there's something wrong with me? What if... what if I can't?"

"Where is this coming from?" He asked, looking intently into her chocolate gaze.

Her fingers trembled as they stroked his cheek, "It's been months since we've been trying and I just... I know, I'm just being silly." She sniffed, "And I'm crying again." She laughed bitterly as she wiped her tears. "The doctor said my hormones are unbalanced. That's why I haven't ovulated since the miscarriage." She tore her gaze from his, "I'm sorry," she whispered in anguish.

"Rin," he lifted her chin, "It's not something you can control." He frowned at the look of pain in her eyes, "You need not apologize. We'll be pregnant soon, I promise."

"You can't promise that," she murmured, nuzzling her nose against the soft black cashmere sweater.

"Can't I?" He smirked as he pulled her hips to meet his, "We'll just have to try harder then," he purred, pressing his lips along her smooth, porcelain neck. "Perhaps here?"

She giggled, swatting his bum playfully, "In the alley?" She asked him, feeling so thankful to have him in her life. _He always knows how to make me smile. _

"If that's what it takes," he chuckled at Rin's expression, "Very well." He pulled back and took her hand, "Perhaps not here." Together they walked back to the restaurant and to their private room.

"Tonight." He promised as he pulled out her chair, whispering in her ear.

Her brown eyes shone with laughter, "You're insatiable." She murmured as she turned and cupped his cheeks, "But I'm so crazy about you, Sesshomaru Takahashi."

He smiled as he placed a kiss to the palms of her hands, "And I you Rin."

* * *

><p>After lunch they took their separate ways, Sesshomaru heading back to his office and Rin returning to work. Around four Rin left the flower shop, greeting her driver as she stepped into the car Sesshomaru had hired. She stifled a yawn as she quickly checked her phone for any messages, her mind distracted by the upcoming wedding bouquets she had to design for the week.<p>

"Rin?"

Rin blinked blearily, jumping as she spotted Miroku sitting across from her. "Miroku? What are you doing here?"

Miroku hesitated, "I… how was work?" He quickly steered the conversation, "I hear that your services have been hired by the Shingawa Hotel for their upcoming conference series, congratulations."

Rin frowned, "Thank you. It went well…" She suddenly felt cold, her stomach queasy as she spoke. "But Miroku, I have a feeling you don't want to talk about flowers."

"Right," Miroku rubbed the back of his neck, dreading this talk. "Look… Rin, there's no better way to tell you this." He pulled out a file from his briefcase and handed it to Rin. "This is a magazine story that was sent to our office this morning. We've verified every piece of information and while I can't confirm personally all of the details... I have to be honest and tell you that the dates all match up."

"What is it?" Rin opened the file and pulled out the magazine, her heart stopping as she read the title. "The shocking scandal inside Tokyo's Cinderella story." She flipped through and found the article, her heart pounding, her chest tight as she read it.

"We've made contact with the alleged mistress, she's an intern in HR."

"The red-head," Rin whispered, her mind instantly flashing back to that moment. Her fingers curled into her palm as she read about their torrid affair. _Late nights in the office, secret meetings in the condo, and business trips... like Hong Kong. _

_Natsumi was right_, she thought, _they were all right. _Rin felt the overwhelming urge to weep, "And you're... saying it's true?" Her body suddenly felt cold, her fingers shaking as she stroked her wedding ring.

_Not again, _she pleaded, _not again. _

Miroku licked his lips, his throat dry, "I'm saying that details have been confirmed. She could be lying Rin, but everything's adding up. She's been with the company for over a year, when most interns come and go every 4 months. There's no reason why she would have gone to Hong Kong in May, but we've confirmed with the hotel that she stayed in the room across from his."

"I..." Rin felt at a lost for words, "I don't know what to think." She whispered, her vision blurred by her tears.

He cleared his throat, averting his gaze from Rin's as he looked out of the limo's window, "We've payed off the magazine, they won't print the article."

She looked down at the image of the woman in the magazine. She could still see that moment. It was like it was just yesterday. The way she was touching him, her Sesshomaru, her _husband_. Just the thought made her heart ache, "And her?"

Miroku sighed, "It's not my position to terminate employees."

Rin wanted to laugh, "Especially since she's sleeping with the boss?" She brought her hands to cover her face, her body numb. Her mind was muddled with confusion. _Everything had been going to well. So perfectly._ "This -," her voice was shaking as she threw the magazine off her lap, "I don't, I don't... know what to do." She looked to him, "Do you think it's true? Do you think he did this?"

Miroku cursed, "Rin… Kami, I've known Sesshomaru for a long time. And I just, I wish I could tell you no but…"

"You can't." She finished for him, tears streaming down her cheeks, "Does he know about the article?"

"No, he doesn't. I thought it was best for you to know first. I scheduled a meeting with him this evening to go over it."

"Wait," Rin's voice shook, her body trembling. "Can you reschedule? Please, just… just give me a day."

He nodded, "Of course, a day." He glanced at his phone, "I'm sorry Rin." He squeezed her hand as he stepped out of the limo, "But I need to get back to the office."

Rin bowed her head, "Thank you," she whispered, her gaze reverting back to the magazine. She felt like she was falling, her heart crumbling. _N__ot again…._

* * *

><p>Later that night Rin laid silently in their bed, wrapped in the comforter as she awaited her husband. She was numb, the shock from Miroku's revelation dulling her senses. <em>He had an affair, <em>she thought, remembering the article's harsh words.

'_Bored by his naive young wife, their marriage nothing but a farce…' _

She whimpered at the memory, her eyes clenching together. _Not again, _she begged, _I can't do this again. _She wiped her eyes, willing herself not to cry. Willing herself to maintain her composure.

Her breath hitched as she heard the door to their home open, those familiar footsteps soon walking up the stairs. Her chocolate gaze darted to the clock, dread filling her every pore, _nine thirty. _She thought, _when he promised that he'd be back by six. _

She felt a sharp pain shoot through her as she buried herself further in the bed. Her eyes were moist, _he was late, again. _She fisted the white bedsheets, her thoughts running wild.

_Were you with her? _She wondered, _all this time when I was waiting for you at home, were you with her? _

She clenched her eyes as she heard the door to their bedroom open, her body tense. She could feel his gaze on her, hear his soft breaths and then finally the door closed. The tension escaped her, her emotions suddenly overwhelming her senses. She wanted to weep, to curl up into a ball and cry. The pain building in her was unimaginable, the thought of their crumbling marriage, of his torrid affair, of his lies.

Rin turned onto her side, shifting over until she was on his side of the bed. Small arms reached forward and grabbed his pillow, holding it close to her small form. She clutched it tightly as she buried her face into it and began to weep. _If this was all a lie, how foolish would she look? To fall for his charm again? To fall more deeply in love than she was before? To lose herself in him, to believe his words, his touch. _

Despite the pain in her heart, her eyelids felt heavy, falling in and out of consciousness as she lost herself in her thoughts.

Hours later Rin awoke, her eyes crusted as they opened. She whimpered, the cold air harsh against her skin. She grabbed the blanket and wrapped it around her as she tiptoed out of the bedroom, spotting the light from the office down the hall. _Maybe it was just a bad dream, _she thought fleetingly as she moved towards the room. _Maybe it was just my imagination running wild. _

"Sesshomaru?" Her voice was scratchy as she called his name, gently rapping her hand against the door.

"Rin?" Sesshomaru looked up from his desk, setting the files onto his desk, "I thought you were asleep."

She was silent, looking at him with her dark eyes that were clouded with emotion. She struggled to answer, but all she could see was that red haired intern wrapped around him. The image taunted her, mocked her. _Was it true? _She wondered, _was she a fool once again? _

Her lips quivered as she spoke, "It's late," she whispered, her voice wavering.

His brows knitted together, "Indeed." He stood up from behind his desk and moved towards her, his hand reaching forward to toy with the end of her long, ebony tresses. "You look lost." He brushed his lips against hers, "Is your mind still with your doctor's appointment?"

"Y-yeah," she was shivering, the thin blanket barely warming her body, "I guess... I just... can't sleep."

"What can I do?" He asked, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead.

_What can he do? _Her fingers curled into his shirt, bunching the cotton in her small fist. _What can he do? _It all came rushing back, her heart aching. _It wasn't a dream. That magazine was still in her bag, her heart on the edge of breaking. _She wanted to fall into his arms and cry. She wanted to beg him for an answer, to tell her it never happened. She whimpered as her eyes filled with tears, her vision blurred white.

"Take me to the beach house," she requested, her gaze meeting his, pleading with those brown orbs. "Where you proposed to me."

Sesshomaru's brows raised, "The beach house?" He echoed as he looked at his watch, "It's nearly midnight."

Her shoulders lowered, "Right…" She blinked back the moisture as she forced a laugh, shaking her head, "I wasn't thinking." She hiked the small blanket around her shoulders, "I don't know why I even-" She stopped as he took her hand and pulled her back into his embrace.

"I didn't say no." He interrupted as he brushed his lips to her temple, "Get your things, I'll meet you by the car in ten."

Her body trembled at his words, the fist curled around her heart tightening. The thoughts in her mind were so conflicting, "Sesshomaru," she whispered, "We don't have to." _We don't have to pretend if this is all a lie. _

He smiled, "But you forget," he murmured, his hand lifting to wipe those tears falling down her rose-tainted cheeks, "I'm wrapped around your finger."

She wanted to believe him, she wanted their marriage to be true. That when he told her that he loved her, he meant it. Her hands shook as she nodded her head, "Ok." She leant up onto her tiptoes to kiss his cheek, "I'll see you soon."

She walked to their bedroom, quickly packing her things, ignoring the tears that threatened to fall. It felt like she was marching to her doom, the heavy thoughts looming over her head. _What if this was the last time? _She wondered, her fingers trailing over their bed as she sat upon it, her breaths heavy and unmatched. She struggled to calm herself, her mind running to the worst of thoughts. _What if this was our last night? _She thought, _the last night she would kiss him goodnight. The last night she would lay next to him as they slept. The last time she would wake up to the man who held her heart. Would he tell her that he loved her? Would he tell her that she was his heart? _

_And would that all be a lie? _

Sesshomaru knocked on the door to their bedroom, her head whipping forward. "It's been fifteen minutes, are you ready?"

"Y-yes, sorry." She quickly moved onto her feet, her hands grabbing the leather handles of her keep-all.

"Daydreaming?" He asked as he took the bag, his other hand finding hers.

Rin glanced down at their interlocked fingers, her thumb running over his wedding band. "Aren't I always?" She jested, forcing a smile onto her face.

* * *

><p>"It's as beautiful as I remember," Rin murmured as they walked along the beach. Her deep brown eyes looked over the dark, blue water, the waves crashing against one another and then gently sweeping their toes.<p>

"Dance with me," he murmured as he bent down to whisper in her ears, his arms wrapping around her small waist.

Her arms moved up, one hand wrapped around his neck, the other firmly holding his. They moved, swaying to nature's song. The waves, the night insects, the crunching of the sand beneath their bare feet.

_This is so romantic, _Rin thought as she laid her head against his chest, inhaling his scent. She chose to ignore that ache in her chest, that one thought that wondered if this was all an act. Her fingers splayed against his as she intertwined their fingers.

"I'm in love with you," she whispered, her eyes closing as she felt his lips press firmly on the top of her head. A tear escaped, the rest held back only by her will. The thought of losing him hurt her so much, her chest tight at the mere thought. _What would she do without him? Her rock? Her heart? _

"Shall we swim in the ocean?" He asked, his hand running over her soft curves.

She shook her head, both of her arms wrapped around his shoulders. She leaned up onto her tiptoes and pressed her chapped lips against his, kissing him as if it were their last. _Because what if it was. _She poured her heart into her touch, her fingers curling into his skin. He groaned, his hand cupping the back of her head as he embraced her touch.

"Make love to me," she requested as they parted, her lips red, her hair tousled. She looked deep into his amber gaze, "Please." Her voice broke, and she wondered if he could tell. She wondered if he knew how her heart was breaking.

His steps faltered at her words, his brows raising, "On the beach?" He asked, his fingers moving to the heavy sweater she wore.

She could not help but giggle, "As romantic as that sounds, I'd much prefer the bed."

"As the lady requests," he returned, sweeping her into his strong arms. She laughed, one arm wrapped around his strong shoulders as they walked into the beach house. _Just lose yourself Rin, _she told herself, _lose yourself in this moment. _

"I adore you," she whispered to him as he laid her on the bed. She moved up onto her knees as he sat beside her.

His hand stroked her long, midnight hair, "Do you?"

She nodded, "I don't think I could ever stop." She spoke, her voice soft, breaking with emotion.

He smiled, "You're so beautiful my Rin," he told her, as he tugged off her sweater, tossing it onto the floor.

"Am I?" She asked him, her fingers unbuttoning his shirt.

"Incredibly," he murmured as he took off her skirt, "You take my breath away." He told her as he stole a quick kiss, "Everyday."

She smiled, her eyes filling with tears as she moved up onto her knees and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. "Make love to me," she requested, soon losing herself in his touch.

Their lovemaking was passionate, hungry, and desperate as she clung to him. From that moment, her thoughts, those heart-aching images were cast from her mind, her ability to think erased as they peaked.

_I love you, I love you, I love you…_

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru groaned as he lazily moved off of her, pressing a kiss to her shoulder. "I love you," he told her as he laid his head next to hers, their legs still intertwined, his hand moulded against her skin.<p>

She closed her eyes, ingraining this moment to her memory. The way his warmth felt against her, the way he looked, his amber eyes pure with lazy lust, his lips curled up as his fingers caressed her back. Her voice shook, "Why?" _Why me? _She wondered, _when you could have anyone. Why me? _

"Hm?" He looked into her brown eyes, "It's impossible not to. You're…" he toyed with her rings, considering his thoughts. "My everything. My first thought, my dream, my heart." The corners of his mouth lifted, "You're so beautiful Rin, and you have no idea how much it affects me when you smile. When you laugh, how easily you make me happy. You make me want to be a better person, to... kami, what would I ever do without you?" He shifted forward and kissed her tenderly, his lips softly pressed against hers, "How did I ever forget you?"

Rin closed her eyes as she felt her tears slide down her cheeks. She wanted so badly to believe his words, to trust that he loved her so implicitly.

"Do you remember the day we went skinny dipping on our honeymoon?" She asked as she giggled softly at the memory, "And we had that insanely romantic idea to make love under that waterfall but it didn't work because the water pressure from the fall was incredibly high?"

He chuckled, his thumb wiping away her tears, "But I still made love to you in that lake."

"You did," she conceded, _he remembers, _she thought fleetingly. Her fingers wrapped around his hand, _feel the moment Rin. _She told herself, pleaded with herself to lose herself in the moment.

He leant his head on her shoulder, his hand resting on her flat stomach. He hummed lightly, "Do you think we made a baby tonight?"

Her heart tightened at his words, looking into his hopeful, amber gaze. "Maybe," she replied finally, finding her words. "If we did, we should name her Miyu."

"Beautiful moon," he laughed, "But what if it's a boy?"

"Kaimu," she whispered, her eyes filling with tears, "Ocean dream."

"Perfect." He moved up and pulled her closer, her head resting on his chest as they embraced. "Are you feeling better?" He asked, brushing her hair with his fingers.

"Yes," she smiled, "I guess I was just feeling down tonight." She shifted over and kissed his cheek, "Thank you for bringing me here."

"Of course," he yawned, resting his head against the pillows.

Rin giggled, mesmerized by him. _Who would have thought, _she thought, _that _the_ Sesshomaru Takahashi yawns when he is tired. _"Tired?" She asked, her voice soft.

"Very. Dream of me," his lips pressed against hers before he closed his eyes, soon drifting to sleep.

Rin's eyes felt heavy but she could not sleep. Instead, her brown orbs watched him, weary, glimmering with tears that fought to be shed. Her fingers inched towards his, slowly moving to stroke his ring.

_He had been her first, _she thought. Her first everything. Her first real date. Her first kiss. Her first love... and her first heartbreak.

And as much as she told herself not to dwell on those images of that woman and Sesshomaru, she could not help but imagine it. Wonder what they did together. Naked, in the dark of the night.

She tensed, pulling her hand back from his._ Did he hold her close and whisper sweet nothings into her ear? Did he tell her that he loved her too? And when he was with other women, did he ever think of her? Knowing how much she loved him? Knowing how much it would have hurt her if she knew? _

A sob escaped her lips as she turned her head, burying her face into the pillows.

She wanted to stop imaging it, to turn off her mind, but she could not. All she could see was him and those other women. Those other beautiful, tall, and elegant women. Women who would look so perfect by his side.

Her tears subsided and she dared to look at him once more, her hand shaking as it touched his chest. _Would this be it? _She asked herself, _the last time he held her close? The last time he told her that he loved her, the last time she would allow herself to believe him?_

Her resolve was firmer, _get out of bed, _she told herself. _Despite the urge to stay with him. Cloaked in his cocoon of warmth._ Her naked body slipped out of the cotton sheets, her bare feet curling against the cold, wood floor.

He moaned as he felt her shift, the lack of her body against his, "Rin?" His voice was bleary, edged in sleep.

"I just need to use the washroom," she whispered quickly, reaching down for her forgotten clothes. She dressed silently, making her way to her bag. Her breath escaped her as she pulled out the letter she had written, then the magazine print-out. She set them next to him, quickly taking a step back as her hands shook. _Please don't let it be true, _she thought as she bowed her head, wiping her tears. _Please don't let out marriage be a lie. _

Rin bent down to kiss him, tears streaming down her cheeks as her lips touched his. _For the last time? _She wondered, sniffling as she watched him sleep. His lashes were long, his nose perfectly arched and his cheekbones angled. He was so handsome, so heartbreakingly handsome. He looked so unattainable, it was unimaginable why someone like him would want someone as damaged as her.

"I love you," she told him, her voice breaking. "I want to believe in you." She squeezed her eyes shut, "I want to believe, so much, that when you tell me that you love me, you actually do. That when you come home and tell me that you missed me, you actually do. But it hurts so much," she whimpered, "It hurts... because I can't." Her heart broke into pieces, "I can't fight for you any more, not if this is still a lie." Her hand covered her mouth as she wept, struggling not to make a noise.

Her tears eventually stopped, her breaths shaky as she stood.

_She had to leave, _she thought finally, gathering her things. She glanced back at his sleeping form, her fingers curled around her bag as she stood by the bedroom door.

_I love you._

* * *

><p><em>Sesshomaru,<em>

_Do you remember the first day I told you that I loved you? I was so happy, so in love with you. A charming, funny, handsome man who hardly smiled. A man who's hand fit perfectly with mine, a man who knew my every thought. You mesmerized me, captured my heart like no one has ever before. And I've never told you, but I've loved you since the moment you asked me to dance. _

_My heart is eternally yours, even if this was a lie._

_I know that I'm a coward for writing this, for running away from you. For not being able to ask you in person the truth. But I'm scared. I'm so terrified to know the truth. So I'll ask you here, when I'm not there to see you read it. When I'm not there to face the truth._

_Is it true? Her? _

_Sesshomaru, all this time I tried, hoping, praying that you'd remember our love. But maybe it was for nothing. Maybe our love never truly existed. Maybe you never truly loved me, and I was nothing more than your naive puppet._

_If it's true, don't you think I've suffered long enough? How foolish of me, don't you think, to have been so naive, so blind to everything. Falling further in love with a man who could never return my feelings. And I can't fight for you anymore, not if it was all a lie. _

_In two months you'll be free of your burden. I promise to go away quietly, and I beg of you, don't hold onto me. If any of this is true, please, just let me go. _

_Rin_

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru felt cold as he read the letter, his hand shaking as he set it on his lap. "Is what true?" He looked around the room, every trace of Rin erased. <em>She was gone… <em>"What's going on?" He asked himself, dread filling him as he pulled the accompanying magazine into his lap.

"The Tokyo Society Magazine," he murmured, his eyebrows bunched together as he read the title story, "The shocking scandal inside the Cinderella story."

His insides twisted at the image of their wedding photo slashed in half, a photo of a familiar woman circled in red.

His eyes closed immediatly as his mind pulled a memory forward, cringing as he saw a hand on his knee, long red nails caressing him. The image faded into another, red lips purring into his ears, "Please sir, let me _help_ you." _That woman, the one in his office when Rin came in. _His heart stopped, as another time came forward…

* * *

><p><em>Sesshomaru leaned against the iron rails of his penthouse suite as he looked over the Hong Kong skyline, taking in the foggy night that masked the bright city lights. He glanced down at his phone, awaiting her call. She had told him that morning to await her evening call for nine, and here it was, fifteen past. He chuckled, his mind no longer swamped with thoughts of contracts and meetings. It was fascinating how the mere thought of her could calm his mind. <em>

_His phone vibrated, her image popping up on the screen. A smile donned his lips as he swiped his finger across, "Rin," he greeted, "I missed you." _

_She giggled, "Missed you too. Sorry I'm late calling, I took a nap after I had supper." _

_"It's fine," he moved to sit in the recliner, "How's the baby?"_

_He swore he could hear her smile, "Absolutely perfect, but he's missing his daddy." She stroked her belly, "Aren't you my little peanut?" _

_"Ah, we've moved on from marshmallow to peanut? What's next? Chip? Mango?" _

_She snorted, "You're such a smart aleck Maru, and if you have to know, I'm thinking jellybean… My dad used to call me that," she added softly, tears brimming at the memory. _

_"Hm, was it because you jumped around all day?" He question, trying to lift her mood._

_She laughed, "You know me so well, don't you?"_

_"Hn… how was your day?" _

_"Good," she hummed to herself as she shimmied under the comforter, "Ayame and I did that baby shower today, it was so pretty. The theme was garden party with a hint of Alice in Wonderland…"_

_As she spoke Sesshomaru closed his eyes, listening to the melody of her voice. How her voice went up when she was excited, how her speech quickened at the ends of her sentences, how her laugh sounded like bells. _

_"Sesshomaru? Ne? Are you still there?" _

_"Yes," he stifled a yawn, "Sorry, I had a long day." _

_"Oh, of course." She glanced at the clock, "It's getting late I guess." She sighed, "Two more days, huh?" _

_"Two more," he repeated, "Do you think you'll survive?" _

_She laughed, "Of course I can, but will you?" She moved onto her side, picturing him next to her, "I mean, who's going to give you good morning kisses and knot your ties?" _

_He chuckled, "I have to admit, my ties have looked sloppier since you're not around." _

_"Mm," she yawned herself, "Honestly, just talking to you for this long has me out of breath." _

_"Rest then," he murmured, "Sleep well Rin."_

_"I will. Love you," she smiled, "See you in two days." _

_"Two days." He moved the phone from his ear and ended the conversation, his gaze set on her image. He had yet to change it since the first time he had added her photo to her number. With a soft sigh he pocketed the device and walked back into his hotel room, tugging off his tie as he set it on the nearby chair. His blazer came off next, resting on the back of the chair. Then his gold woven knot cufflinks, a one-month wedding gift from Rin were placed on the coffee table. _

_He walked to the bedroom, opening the sliding doors with one hand as the other rubbed his aching neck. He stopped as his gaze fell to the bed, the room lit with tea candles. _

_There on the bed was her. She wore a black silk corset that bared her full cleavage, her red hair voluminous and curled. She rested seductively on the white cotton sheets, her long, lean legs highlighted by a lace garter. Red stilettos donned her feet, her perfect red lips parting as she greeted him._

_"You looked stressed tonight, darling." She rose from the bed and moved towards him with a cat-like grace. She pouted as her elegant hands rested on his broad shoulders, her fingers toying with the mother of pearl buttons on his white shirt. "Why don't I help you relax?"_

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru froze at the memory, <em>the intern. <em>When she had asked, "You don't remember me?" Was she telling the truth? Their affair?

It couldn't be true, he thought, reading through the article. 'Late nights at the office soon led to a torrid affair between the CEO of YK Takahashi and the former lingerie model… secret midnight rendezvous… a condo where he had his affairs… business trips that he took his mistress instead of his pregnant wife…'

He did not want to believe it, but he saw her. That intern. In his hotel, touching him.

_But he loved Rin, didn't he? He had been devoted, faithful, in love… hadn't he?_

He grimaced as another image flashed forward, a thin hand with long red nails resting on his thigh, ruby red lips whispering into his ears…

"No," he cursed as he stumbled off the bed and walked towards the bathroom, splashing himself with cold water from the sink. More images came forward, a different woman, with large breasts and long, blonde hair rubbing his arm, whispering to him.

His chest felt heavy, his breathing uneven. "No, no… fuck!" His hands curled into fists as he pictured Rin, standing there in his office, that look on her face as she walked in on them.

He had hurt her. If this article was true, had what he had with Rin been a lie? "Fuck, fuck!" He had hurt her, again.

He looked at himself in the mirror, despising the man he saw. _Who was he? _He wondered, tracing the scar on his face. _If he wasn't the happy, doting husband, who was he? A man that cheated on his wife? His pregnant wife? _

"Fuck," he cursed, his fingers clenching the marble countertop, "Fuck!" He threw the bar of soap at the shower door, the glass breaking at the impact. He didn't flinch as the glass shattered, falling onto the white floor. The sole thought he had was _her. _

"Rin," he murmured, his eyes hollow. _He had hurt her, when he had sworn, promised that he never would. _

_Who was he? _

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru stared at the stone building, his hands clenched around the steering wheel of his BMW. <em>She was there, <em>he thought, his body numb. He had rushed back to Tokyo after reading the letter, his mind tortured the entire drive over.

_How could he have cheated on her? _He cursed, resting his head against the lester seat. _She was so perfect, so goddamn perfect. _He was torn, his mind split in half. _Was it a lie? _He wondered, had he lied to himself this entire time, fooling himself into thinking he could play the part of the perfect husband?

He didn't know how he reached the front door but there he was, ringing the doorbell. Sesshomaru was tense as the door opened, Kouga's face hard as their gaze met.

"It is true?" Kouga demanded, "Because I swear to fucking god Sesshomaru, if it is, I'm done with you."

Sesshomaru felt like he was underwater, his mind not focused on Kouga's words, "Rin," he repeated, his eyes searching the hallway for his wife. "Let me see Rin."

Kouga nearly laughed, "Rin. You think I'm going to let you fucking see her? After everything you put her through, you piece of shit-"

"Kouga," her voice called from the hallway, her head peaking out from behind the wall. "It's ok. I want to talk to him."

"Rin," Kouga turned his head, swearing, "Are you sure?"

She nodded her head, "Yes." She had tried to prepare herself for this, for facing him. Kouga moved back from the door, revealing Sesshomaru. He was disheveled, his sweater thrown sloppily over his shirt, his tie wrinkled, half undone.

"Rin," he whispered, his mind blank as he looked at her.

Rin blinked back tears as she began, stepping forward, "Sesshomaru," she pleaded softly, her fingers clutching the wedding band he had given her months before, "Is it true?"

Sesshomaru felt his body shiver, his hand gripping the edge of the door. He wanted to say no, tell her that he had been faithful, utterly devoted, but he couldn't. Because he had seen that intern, in his bed, dressed in that black bustier and garter. "Rin," he whispered, his chest tight, "I-"

A sharp gasp escaped her peach lips, "It's true?" Her eyes were clouded with pain, "Isn't it?"

"I-I don't know," he admitted, "Rin," he looked at her and suddenly he felt the urge to kneel over. Kami, she was so perfect, so beautiful. Her long hair was curled today, dressed in that yellow skirt she had worn on their first date as a married couple. He swallowed, his breathing heavy as his mind was tormented with the image of another woman.

_Had he cheated on her? Had an affair? On Rin? His Rin? _

Rin sniffed, wiping her eyes, "I need to know Sesshomaru," her soft voice echoed in the long hallway as she moved towards the door, "Is it true? Did you..." her breath hitched, she could not continue.

He was silent, turning his head to look into those captivating brown eyes. _All this time, had he simply fooled himself into thinking he was a changed man? One truly capable of love? These feelings he had for her, were they false? Did he hold back all this time because somewhere deep down he knew that it was just a lie? _

He moved towards her and brought her small body into his. She looked up at him, tears dripping down her cheek. He struggled to rationalize his feelings. The situation.

_Was it all a lie?_

_Was it because she had intrigued him? She was a change from his typical type. Was that why he married her? Because she would be the perfect wife? Loving, caring, infinitely devoted to him. Someone like Rin had no ulterior motives, she wasn't driven by money or status. He had known how easily she would be his. So had he used that to his advantage? Manipulated her with soft words and promises, bestowing her with gifts almost unimaginable to a simple girl like her?_

_Was it all a lie?_ _Their marriage? When he whispered I love you, did he mean it with his whole heart?_

"Rin," he said finally, his fingers curled into her waist. His thoughts were full of despair, _for_ _what other explanation was there? He had never been faithful to a woman, not even Kagura. How had he managed to delude himself for so long that he was a changed man?_

Rin whimpered in his hold, his eyes closing as he inhaled her floral scent. _She was better off without him. He had known how selfish it was not to let her go. He had fooled himself into thinking that keeping her by his side would benefit her. How utterly wrong he was. For it only caused her more pain. _

He thought back to the letter she had written, '_let me go'. _He exhaled sharply, his heart clenched, "Yes." His baritone was heavy, his amber gaze clouded.

She was crestfallen at his response, the light in her eyes dimmed. _Because of him. _Her lips parted, words not escaping as she struggled to speak. "W-why?" She asked, her voice pain-stricken.

_A lie._

His hand lifted to stroke her pale cheeks, struggling to put on a mask of indifference. _His love had been a lie. _He had performed so well the part of the doting, faithful husband that he had begun to believe it himself. He braced himself for her reaction, "You weren't enough."

Rin pushed herself out of his embrace, stumbling to catch herself on her feet as she clutched the table by the door. "I wasn't enough," she repeated, cursing her tears, cursing herself for falling for his lies once more. "I trusted you," she accused, "I believed you when you told me that you loved me. I fell for you again, I believed in you." She sniffed, "I trusted you!" She cried again, wiping her eyes as she looked to him.

"How many times?" She whispered, her heart ache evident in her words, "How many times am I going to give you my everything and have you break me before I learn my lesson?" She wept, crumpling to the floor. Her thin shoulders shook as she cried, wrapping her arms around her knees.

Sesshomaru exhaled sharply, resisting his urge to hold her, to soothe her tears. _It was a lie, _he reminded himself, _it had all been a lie. _He struggled to find reason for his conflicting emotions._ But if it had been a lie, why was he mourning her loss? _

The rational side of his mind broke through. _The love he had for her was nothing more than misidentified feelings of affection. He cared for her, for she had been his perfect little wife. The almost mother to his son._ He averted his eyes, struggling to maintain his restraint. _He cared for her, which is why he was willing to let her go. _

His self-control snapped as she whispered his name, begging, pleading. "Maru."

He knelt down in front of her, thinking back to all those moments he had told her that he loved her. Those mornings when he held her close, listening to her soft melodious voice as she sung to him. Those moments when she smiled bright, when she brought him flowers, laughed, and surprised him.

_Love? _

A foolish thought, his rational side argued. He didn't love. He had never loved. But that didn't stop him from gathering her in his arms, holding her as she shed tears. Time passed slowly for them, Rin clutching his shoulders as she cried. "I loved you," she sobbed, "I gave you everything I had. My heart, my, my everything…" She lifted her head from his shoulder, her eyes red, her cheeks puffy.

"I'm sorry," her voice cracked, her brown orbs tainted red with sorrow. "I'm sorry that I wasn't enough." She memorized those brilliant amber eyes, the ones she dreamt of when she slept, the ones she would always dream of. She wished to forever be in his embrace, but it seemed she was fated to never have her happy ending.

She sniffed, wiping the tears that continued to fall. "Does she make you happy? Does… does she make your heart beat faster than I ever could?" She asked, her hands finding his navy small fingers stroked the silk, thinking back to how all those mornings when she had been infinitely happy knotting his ties. Foolishly delusional to think that everything was perfect. That she was living her dream.

"Rin," his hands covered hers, "I-"

She shook her head, "I don't... I don't want to know." She slipped her fingers from his, "I've always known," she murmured, "That this...us, wouldn't last. That one day you'd break my heart." She wiped her eyes as her voice cracked, "But the second time isn't any easier." She struggled to continue, her hands shaking by her sides, "But at least this time, this time you don't hate me." She gave a bitter laugh, looking down at the hardwood floor.

She bowed her head, struggling for composure. "We'll go back to the old arrangement then, you in the condo." She glanced back at him, adding softly, "I always did wonder why you kept it." She moved to her feet, Sesshomaru mimicking her movements.

They stood in front of one another, immobile. _One more kiss, _she thought as she leaned up and brought her lips gently against his. "I'll always love you," she told him, her heart breaking as she spoke, "Even if it was all a lie." She moved down from her tiptoes and bowed, her footsteps silent on the hardwood as she left.

Sesshomaru's gaze trailed her delicate form, his chest tight as he closed his eyes. _A lie, _he reminded himself, _it was all a lie._

Kouga stepped back in the hallway once Rin ran past him, cursing as he walked to the door. He looked at his friend, shaking his head, "How many times are you going to fucking hurt her?"

Sesshomaru remained silent, fingering the gold band on his hand. "I thought I loved her," he murmured sincerely, "But it wasn't enough." He pulled the ring from his finger and handed it to Kouga, "Give this to her." He caught the puzzled expression on his face, "Write up a divorce petition, I'm ending this farce now."

Kouga was in shock as took the ring from Sesshomaru, "And Murasaki?"

Sesshomaru's heart felt heavy, _it's over. _"I'll deal with it." His shoulders tensed as he heard Rin's sobs echoing in the hallway, suppressing the urge to sooth her, to hold her in his arms. _Because that's not who he was._ "Take… take care of her," he closed his eyes, his heart twisting as he walked back to his car.

He felt numb as he leant back against the leather seat of his car, his amber orbs watering. _So this was it, _he thought. _It was really all just a lie. He had truly fooled himself into thinking he loved her. Thinking he was a faithful, devoted husband. _Now, there would be no more waking up next to her, no more calling her in the middle of the day, no more surprise dates and presents. _No more Rin._ Because this is who he was. The man who manipulated and used people to his own advantage. The man who lied, who cheated on his wife.

The man who was a monster.

* * *

><p>Rin felt heavy as she walked into their bedroom, dropping her bag as she stepped in front of the painting that hung above the fireplace. <em>A perfect moment, <em>she thought, thinking back to their first dance as a married couple. How happy she had been, how foolishly in love she was with a man who would never fully return that love.

She closed her eyes as she turned away, her heart pained by the memory. She slipped off her dress as she neared the bed, tossing the garment onto the white settee before slipping onto his side of the bed. She hugged his pillow, surrounded by his scent. The smell was so masculine, so intoxicating.

_He was too good to be true._

Her mind wandered as she struggled to sleep. All those nights when he came home late, had he been with other women? When he smelt like perfume, she had assumed guilelessly that it was from sitting next to business associates or clients.

_How utterly pathetic, _she thought, she could almost hear Natsumi's voice mocking her naivety. He wasn't faithful. Not even when she was pregnant with his child.

And then, she thought bitterly, about what her life would be like if they never met. Would she have fallen for a simple man? A nice accountant or shop keeper who would be entirely faithful and utterly in love with his wife? Would they have raised a family? Would she have been as deliriously happy as she was when she was with _him?_

Yet as much as she wanted to hate him, she couldn't bring herself to. Despite the fact that he had ruined her heart, destroyed it to pieces. Despite how empty she felt, for her soul was missing a part. She would always yearn for him.

And so she mourned, her fairytale so easily broken by one man. And as crazy as it was, as stupid as she was, she was still so madly, so irrevocably in love with the man who had broken her heart.

* * *

><p>xoxo<p>

tuille


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

by

tuille

* * *

><p>disclaimer: anything you recognize, i do not own.<p>

_You're the one that I love, and I'm saying goodbye..._

* * *

><p>Rin felt cold as the elevator doors opened, that long, empty hallway appeared daunting, her hands clutching the handles of her bag. <em>So this is the end, <em>she thought as she walked down the hardwood path, her heels echoing against the bamboo.

"Rin," Miroku bowed his head as the petite woman arrived at the entrance of the room, "How have you been?" He asked, taking in the bags under her eyes, her pale complexion, and her lacklustre gaze.

"Ok," she replied softly, forcing that smile on her face.

He sighed, his hand gently resting on her arm, "You've been staying with Ayame?"

"Yeah," she rubbed her eyes, struggling to stop those tears from falling. "They've been taking care of me."

"Good."

Rin gave him a tense smile, "Yeah," she answered softly, her gaze moving past him to the silver-haired gentleman who's back was turned. She admired his broad shoulders, remembering those moments when she once could have run to him. When she could have wrapped her arms around his waist, kissed his cheeks, and laughed with him. She cursed as she felt her eyes moisten, her chest tightening.

_I can't do this, _she thought as she took a step back out of the room and leant against the wall. _Not yet, _she closed her eyes as she head hung low, _not yet. _

Miroku noted her expression as he ran his hand through his hair. "We'll be inside… take your time." He told her, walking into the office.

"She's here," Miroku announced as he walked to Sesshomaru, "Are you sure about this?"

Sesshomaru replied, his face impassive, "Yes."

Miroku bit his lip, "Ok." He looked back at the door, finding the young woman whose fists were clenched by her side as she tried to stop herself from crying.

"I'm sorry I'm late," her voice was meek as she finally tiptoed into the office, her fingers gripping the handle of her bag tight.

Sesshomaru closed his eyes as she spoke, his thumb moving reflexively to his ring finger. _No ring, _he thought, stepping away from the window to sit at the large desk.

Rin did not dare look at the man in front of her as she took a seat across from him. _Don't cry, don't cry, _she repeated, her hands rubbing her forearms as a cold chill moved over her.

"Alright, we'll begin." Miroku cleared his throat as he began, laying out the documents in front of them. He pulled out the first file, "These are the finalized divorce papers. We'll send it to a judge later this evening. The process should take no longer than two weeks."

Rin felt her heart sink into her stomach at those words. _We'll no longer be married, _she thought, her gaze fixed on the white papers. She felt numb, her gaze lifeless and dull. _She knew this day would come, so why did it still hurt? Why did her chest ache just at the thought of him? _

"Rin?" Miroku's voice pulled her from her thoughts.

"Ah, yes." Her voice was hesitant as she looked at the document in front of her, her hand shaking as it reached forward for the pen. _Two weeks, _she thought, _two weeks until she would no longer be his wife. _

Sesshomaru's hands fisted tight, resisting the urge to take the pen from her hands. _Let her go, _he told himself, his eyes closing.

_She deserves better. _

Sesshomaru lifted the pen as Miroku turned the paper towards him, his gaze set on her signature. _Rin Takahashi, _he thought, _she had signed it as Takahashi. _His fists clenched once more, a cold chill running through him.

_Let her go._

Rin watched Sesshomaru elegantly scrawl his name on the line, admiring his long fingers, remembering the feel of her hands laced through his. _Just a memory, _she thought, wondering when it began to feel like she was looking at a stranger.

_Because her Sesshomaru was no longer. _

"Alright," Miroku tucked the sheets into his leather folder. "I'll contact you both when the papers are signed. Rin," he bowed low, "Take care."

"Thank you," Rin stood up to bow in return. Her brown eyes darted to his for a brief moment, her breath hitching at the sight of him tugging on his tie. _He still makes my heart flutter, _she thought, her chest aching.

Sesshomaru moved up from his seat, walking towards the entrance of the room before pausing. Rin hesitated as she glided past him to leave.

"Rin."

He called out her name, unable to stop himself from reaching for her, from clasping his hand through hers as she moved past him, her delicate form halting at his actions. She flinched at his touch, the irises of her wide eyes were stained red as she looked up at him, her mascara smudged.

_Let me go. _

His gaze softened as he looked at her, his hand lifting on its own accord to cup those rose-stained cheeks. "Rin," he murmured as his thumb brushed against her soft skin, looking deeply into those brown eyes. She was silent as she moved her small hands and placed them on his chest, just above his heart. Her gaze was haunting as he lifted her chin.

_We're over, _he thought, _so why is it that I can't let you go?_

Rin took that moment to study his expression, those amber eyes, those perfect lips. She remembered those moments when he kissed her, when he held her hand, and whispered in her ear.

_It was like it was all a dream. _

She felt her eyes mist, her heart twisting at the memories. _Did your heart ever beat faster because of me? _She wondered as a single tear dripped down her cheek. _Did I ever make you nervous and trip over your words? _She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, _did you ever miss me? As much as I missed you? _

Sesshomaru cursed as he laid his forehead against hers, his fingers moving to her waist, holding her close. _How easy, _he knew, _how easy it would be to ask her to stay. To have her in his arms for the rest of his life. But he couldn't, not after all he had done. He didn't deserve her. _

He felt his eyes become moist as his nose brushed hers, his hands shaking as they gripped her tight. "Rin," he whispered breathlessly, memorizing her scent, her touch.

_Stay._

Their lips were almost touching as he lowered his head.

_I'll miss you. _

"I'm sorry," he whispered as he pressed his lips to hers. Their last kiss was slow, their hearts aching at the touch. He groaned as he lost himself in her taste, the feel of her body against his. Soon the kiss became desperate and rough, his hands knotting her hair as he brought her closer into his embrace. Rin's eyes were closed, her arms wrapping around his shoulders, her fingers finding their way through his hair. She moaned as he ran his hands down her sides, her body trembling at his touch.

_Does he know, _she wondered, _how he makes me feel? How he can make me lose my mind? How he can both make my heart soar and break? _She whimpered as they parted, her body frozen for a moment as her eyes opened. Her nerves were on fire as she took a step back, her hand touching her lips.

"I'm sorry." He repeated, his voice shaking.

She blinked back tears, her throat tight, "For?"

His amber gaze was sincere, "Everything."

_Everything. _

Rin nodded, taking a moment to calm herself. Her fingers curled into fists as she stood in front of him, feeling a cool breeze move past her. She looked into those amber eyes, _how long could you have pretended? _She wondered, _how long was this charade going to last? _

"You lied to me." She whispered finally, her heart clenching as she spoke. "I can't help but wonder, all this time, did I just not want to know? Or was I blind? Were you just that great of a liar?"

Sesshomaru looked back at her, his shoulders heavy. _Guilt? _He wondered, that sinking feeling in his chest not going away.

"You never really loved me, did you?" She laughed bitterly as the tears fell down her cheeks. "I guess I didn't want to admit to myself that it was too good to be true. I wanted to pretend that you spoke the truth. That I wasn't a fool for not wanting to let you go the first time. For convincing myself to fight for you, for us."

She sniffed, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. "How foolish of me, for loving you."

"Rin," his voice caught as he spoke her name.

"No," she shook her head, "It's ok." She looked at him and smiled, tears in her eyes. "I've stopped letting myself daydream." Her smile faltered, "I should let you go," she told him.

"But I… I'll miss you. I'll miss…" she closed her eyes, unable to meet his gaze. "Holding your hand and making you laugh. I'll miss…" her voice broke as she covered her mouth, urging herself not to cry. "You. You…" her eyes were watering, her gaze blurred by the tears, "It's silly, but I think… I'll miss your hugs the most." She laughed bitterly, "Sesshomaru Takahashi, greatest hug giver," she jested softly, looking down at her feet.

_This is it Rin, _she thought, _their last moment. _She glanced up at him and moved up onto her tiptoes to press her pink lips to his cheek. "Sesshomaru…"

_I love you._

"Aishiteru," she whispered, knowing how pathetic she was. Still so hopelessly in love with him. A shadow of the man she had fallen in love with the day he had asked her to dance. She was blinking back tears as she put her hand in her pocket, her fingers curling against the metal band.

_My love is more than words, _she thought, her gaze fixed on the hardwood floor.

_But that was just a lie. _

She pulled the ring from her pocket and took his hand, placing it into the centre of his palm. _Those good morning kisses, those I miss you's, those moments when they laughed and slow danced in the middle of the day. _

_Just a lie._

She pulled her hand from his, taking a shaky breath, "Will you… lie to me, one more time?" _I still can't let you go, _she thought, despising her weakness. Despising how pathetic she was when it came to _him. _

_A lie? _Sesshomaru lifted her chin and looked deeply into those brown eyes. He remembered the first day he heard those three words fall from her lips. The first day he had confessed to her.

_Lie to me._

_How cruel was fate_, he thought as he murmured those three words. "I love you."

_But it wasn't a lie, _he felt, gently releasing his hold on her. _Because he knew now, the feelings he had for her. He had fallen for her. Truly. Somewhere between the day he had woken up as a stranger to the day he found her letter. He had fallen for that foolish girl who fought for their relationship. For the foolish girl who danced in the rain and decorated his home with flowers. _

_The foolish girl who had fallen for a monster like him. _

_He knew now that he loved her, which meant that he could let her go. Even when he wanted to hold onto her tighter. Even when he wanted to keep her next to him. But that was selfish of him. _

_Their whole relationship, he had been selfish. _

_But for her, for Rin, his Rin, he could be selfless. _

Rin blinked back tears, her voice breaking at his words. She bowed, her heart breaking into pieces, _again._ "Goodbye Sesshomaru." Her voice was timid, _don't cry Rin. _"I…" She trailed off, unable to continue.

_Will you miss me? _

She wondered as she moved away, trying her hardest to ignore the pain in her chest. _Because I don't think I will ever forget you. _

Sesshomaru felt his heart clench as he touched the gold band in his hand. _Goodbye, _he thought, resisting the urge to hold her close. To ask her to stay, knowing how easily she would. Amber eyes were filled with regret, with sorrow, as they followed that petite brunette leave.

_Don't go._

"Rin…" he whispered as he took a step forward, but it was too late. She was already gone.

_Goodbye. _

* * *

><p><em>Rin giggled as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, whispering into his ear. "You look so handsome today," she told him, pressing her lips to his cheek.<em>

_"__Do I?" He returned with a hint of a smile, "You look beautiful," he told her, brushing her long hair behind her ear. _

_She blushed as she sat on his lap, his arm finding his way around her small waist as he pulled her back towards his chest. "Have you been outside ever since you woke up?" She asked, her fingers playing with the gold band on his left hand. _

_"__Mm," he replied as he kissed the top of her head before leaning back against the bamboo lounge chair. _

_"__It's weird," she told him with a grin, "Seeing you so relaxed." She cocked her head, taking in his relaxed form, his lips curling up as he stroked her bare legs. Sesshomaru Takahashi, the arrogant heir to YK Takahashi, was almost unrecognizable with his silver hair loosely tied back, shirtless and wearing black briefs. _

_"__Hm," he answered lazily, "I suppose you're a good influence then." _

_"__Guess you'll have to keep me around then." She teased, turning her cheek to listen to his heartbeat. It was steady, she thought, her finger tracing his name on his chest. _

_"__You're going to drive me crazy," he murmured, his hand catching her wrist. _

_"__I like driving you crazy," she replied, pressing her lips onto his naked skin. _

_"__Rin," he groaned as she shifted, turning her hips so she straddled his thighs, the white robe covering her slim body slipping off her shoulders. _

_"__I'm not wearing anything under this," she told him coyly, looking up at him through her long lashes._

_He smirked, his hands moving to untie the sash, the silk falling onto his lap. She was naked, her petite form glowing under the sunlight. "You're beautiful," he told her, his hand moving down her slight curves, cupping her bum as he pulled her to him, his lips pressing hungrily against hers. _

_She giggled as he sat up, struggling for a moment to keep his balance as he moved to the bedroom. She fell onto her back as he dropped her onto the bed, crawling down her body as he pressed kisses to her delicate form. _

_"__Maru," she moaned at his touch, whimpering as his mouth descended on her core, her fingers entangling his silver hair. "Mm," she twisted her hips, tugging on his hair. "More," she pleaded, her toes curling as his tongue lapped her centre. "Oh, Maru… Maru, I'm coming…" she squealed as she came. "Oh my god." Rin released her hold on his hair, her head turning to the side as her body went lax with pleasure. _

_"__Rrrinn," he growled as he moved up her body and pulled off his briefs. "You drive me crazy," he told her, his forehead resting against hers as she struggled to come down from her high. _

_"__Oh," her chest was heaving up and down as she caught her breath. She cupped his cheeks and grinned, "Wow. You're really good at sex." _

_He laughed at her comment, "Thank you." He kissed her lips softly now, "Are you feeling ok?" He asked, his hand caressing her small waist._

_"__Mmhmm," she closed her eyes, enjoying the feel of his warm, toned form on top of hers. "I'm all yours," she murmured, moving up to wrap her arms around his shoulders, their lips finding one another._

_He smirked, "Mine," he growled, slipping his member into her, their pace slow and sensuous. He hissed with pleasure,"Fucking mine," he nipped her ear as his lips moved down to her neck._

_"__Oh god," she cursed as his pace increased, her fingers curling into his back. "Sesshomaru…" She repeated his name over and over like a mantra for what felt like hours until she peaked. "Sesshomaru," she whimpered, "Oh…"_

_He chuckled as he set her back on the bed. "We'll have to work on your stamina," he told her teasingly as he felt her core tighten around him as she came for the second time that morning. _

_"__Mmm," she opened her eyes, "But we have forever, don't we?" She kissed his cheek and smiled, "To practice?"_

_"__Forever," he confirmed, his fingers caressing her rose stained cheeks. _

_"__Mm," she mewled as he pulled out, her long lashes fluttering at the movement. "Sesshomaru, we don't have to stop," she murmured, her hand finding his. _

_"__You're getting greedy," he teased, gently turning her over. He pulled her hips up to meet his, "We've yet to try this position." He purred into her ears seductively, his strong hands wrapped around her waist. _

_"__Oh," Rin blushed as she settled on her knees, her elbows resting on the pillows. _

_"__I adore when you blush," he murmured as he ran his hand down the length of her back. "Your entire body turns red." _

_"__Sesshomaru," she whined, her cheeks red, wiggling her pert bum._

_"__Rin," he returned, entering her once more with a deep thrust. "Kami," he cursed as his hands clutched her hips, "You're so fucking tight."_

_"__Mm," she bit her lip, "Kami," she whimpered at his touch, his soft manipulations to her body. He knew exactly how to bring her pleasure, she mused as she came again and again until her senses overloaded and her eyes closed, her body exhausted from making love. _

_Later in the afternoon, Rin awoke in the king-sized bed, the light blanket strewn over her petite form. She blinked wearily, "Sesshomaru?" She called his name as she looked around the room, the villa silent save for the soft closing of the kitchen cabinet. _

_"__I guess you're already up," she whispered as she pulled on his forgotten shirt, tying her hair up with an elastic. Her feet shuffled softly on the hard wood, smiling as she found him eating a slice of toast. "Maru?" _

_"__Hn?" He glanced over at his wife of three days and smiled, "Sleeping beauty awakens. Did you want something to eat?" _

_She shook her head and pressed her strawberry-stained lips to his cheek, "Nope, I just remembered that I didn't tell you that I loved you yet." _

_He chuckled in return and his hand found hers, his thumb affectionally rubbing that gold band on her finger. "Well that won't do." _

_"__Mm," she grinned as she leant against the white kitchen island, shyly looking towards him. "I love you, I love you, I love you." She exclaimed, coyly biting her lip. Her honey brown eyes shining with brilliance, vitality and passion. _

_He smiled, "And I you," he told her, taking her lips once more. _

_My love is more than words…_

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru sat in his office, the glow from his computer exhausting his eyes. He sighed as he glanced at his watch, <em>past midnight, <em>he mused bitterly, _again. _He laid his head against the leather seat, his eyes closed as he tried to rest. Since the day he had signed those divorce papers, he had thrown himself into work. Trying to erase thoughts of her from his mind by burying himself in mountains of papers. Contracts to sign, deals to make, mergers to overtake.

But it didn't work.

Because he always thought of her.

_You haunt me Rin, _he thought as he rubbed his face, utterly exhausted. Mentally, physically. He pulled out his phone and dialled his inbox, his body tense as he listened to that single message he saved.

_'__Good morning Sesshomaru!' _Her voice was bright, and he felt the corners of his lips lift in response. _'Happy six months. How cheesy, neh? I never thought I'd be the type of person to celebrate something so silly as dating someone for six months, but here I am, making you a special cake. I hope you get in safe today, and even though you'll probably be exhausted, thank you for coming to see me tonight. Oh! And Shippo made us a card for today,' she giggled then, the phone rustling as she picked up the gift. 'It's the cutest ever, it says Happy Day of Love Uncle Sesshy-maru and Auntie Rinny. He really is the sweetest, isn't he? Anyways, you're probably bored listening to me ramble on and on, I'll stop now. Gunbatte kudasi! I love you, see you tonight!' _

Sesshomaru was silent as the call ended, _I love you. _He cursed as he hung up, flinging the phone into the wall. He rubbed his face with his hands, feeling drained, weary.

_I love you, _her words whispered into his ears. He could imagine her standing next to him, imagine her soft, feminine scent. He could imagine the way she felt in his arm, the way her lips felt against his. _Rin. His Rin. _

He missed her. Only seven days and he missed her. _A lifetime without you, _he thought as he moved out of his chair and walked to the window.

_So this is what it's like, _he thought, _to miss someone. To truly mourn for someone you loved. _He knew now, what it was like to be happy. To have that bright, ray of sunshine in his life. To have someone that loved him, cared for him, adored him, and he had been so foolish. So fucking foolish to have ruined it.

"Rin," he murmured as his hand leant against the cold, glass window, "I'm…" _sorry? Missing you? A monster? _

_Or all of the above…_

* * *

><p>"Sesshomaru," Rin whispered as she woke up in her twin sized bed, her fingers moving to her left, to where <em>he <em>always slept. _What are you doing Rin? _She chastised herself as she pulled her hand back, _he's not here. _She sat up, looking around the small bedroom, her eyes falling on the white wedding album that laid at the foot of the bed. _Wake up Rin, _she told herself, _your fairytale is over._

_It's not healthy, _she reminded herself as she wiped her eyes, _to think of him so often. To miss him as much as I do. To crave his touch, his warmth, his voice. _

She closed her eyes, _because he's hurt me, so much. _She sniffed as a single tear fell down her cheek, her head hanging. She felt ashamed and pathetic, _and yet here you are, __still crying over him._ _Will there ever be a day, _she wondered, her fingers curling into her comforter. _W__hen I don't cry? When I don't wake up and miss him? When I don't think of what could have been? _

Rin wiped her eyes and pushed herself up and off the bed, quietly getting ready for the day. She quickly dressed in white jeans and a pink blouse, tying her hair up in a ponytail. She paused by the entrance as she looked back at the small apartment she had rented since signing the papers. _This is your life now, _she told herself, _no more Cinderella story. No more Prince Charming. No more happily ever after… _

"Ten o'clock at the gardens for the Morimoto wedding," she reminded herself as she slid into her car, buckling her seatbelt. She looked at herself in the mirror, touching the dark circles under her eyes. _Seven days and counting without a full night of sleep. It was so hard to sleep, without him. _ "And then 3 o'clock for the wedding anniversary," she murmured, pushing all her thoughts of _him _out of her mind.

_Just concentrate on your work Rin, you can do it…_

After a tiring day, Rin returned to the shop. She was sitting in the back with Ayame at the centre island, her gaze blank as she looked out the bay windows.

Ayame frowned as she noticed the look on Rin's face. "You've been out of it since the wedding anniversary event," she murmured, concerned. "Are you ok?"

Rin smiled softly, remembering the party. "They were married for 50 years." She chuckled lightly, "50 years," she licked her lips, laughing at herself as she felt tears fill her gaze. "I thought that someday," her voice broke, "That it would be me."

_Us. _

"Oh Rin," Ayame sighed, squeezing her friend's hand. "You miss him, don't you?" She dared to ask.

Rin bit her lip, thinking for a moment. _She couldn't lie. Ayame could read her like a book._ "I… yeah." She hung her head, ashamed at herself for missing him. "In the mornings it's the worse. Because I wake up, after dreaming of him, expecting him to be next to me. Or expecting to hear the shower. But he isn't there, and I'm alone."

_Alone. _The thought hit her straight in the gut.

_She hated feeling alone. _

"It's pathetic," Rin whispered, feeling those dreaded emotions crawl back in. "Because he probably doesn't miss me. And yet here I am, wallowing in my misery." She crossed her legs as she looked out the window. "He's everywhere Ayame. In my dreams, my thoughts, in the real world. Even at the event today, two women came up to me, telling me that they hope I become pregnant again soon. Even his CFO was there, with his _second_ wife. What are they going to think, when it comes out that we're getting a divorce? And I'll be living the rest of my life as Sesshomaru Takahashi's ex-wife, while he moves on." _If he already hasn't…_

Ayame touched Rin's hands, "Rin, it's not healthy for you, to be here is it?"

"Working?" She shook her head firmly, "No, I'm fine."

Ayame frowned, "I mean being in Tokyo. It's like you said, he's everywhere. You hear his name on the radio, on the news, in magazines, on the sides of buildings."

Rin looked at the table, averting her gaze, "I'm…" _Fine? Was she? _

"Rin," Ayame bit her lip. "As much as I want you here, maybe you should leave. If only for a little while, once the media hears about everything. Maybe come back after the aftermath dies down. Because if I were you… I don't think I could live in his shadow for the rest of my life."

Rin rubbed her ring finger, considering her words. "You mean run away?"

"More like… lie low," Ayame placed her hands on her rounded belly, "The press can be vicious. And you know already how evil those high society people can be. Just… think about it." She wiped her eyes, "Oh gosh, here we go again. Pregnancy hormones." Ayame explained, waving her hand to fan her face. "I don't think there's been a day when I don't cry."

Rin smiled softly, "I remember that. And the cravings," she moved off the stool and grabbed a jar of pickles from the mini fridge. "Here, for you."

"Thanks Rinny," Ayame grinned as she plucked one out and bit into it. "Oh yum. Thank god for pickles."

Rin laughed, tucking her hair behind her ear, "Your breath is going to be disgusting for the rest of the day."

"I'm sure Kouga will appreciate it."

"Eww," Rin shook her head, "Weird images Ayame!" She giggled, hopping back onto the seat.

"Mm." She finished her pickle before she continued. "In all seriousness Rin, I don't want to see you getting hurt. Not again. And once this news comes out, people are not going to leave you alone. You've seen what they did to Mizuhara's first wife. She's still being followed by the press, and it's been five years."

"Yeah," Rin played with her necklace, "The scorned ex-wife. He cheated on her and yet the press donned her the 'bitchy, frigid wife' and him as the poor, lonely man who just wanted love." She felt something catch in her throat, _what would they call me? _She wondered, _the stupid little girl who wanted to play Cinderella? _

"Rin," Ayame hesitated, "Don't do anything drastic. Just… just consider everything. Besides," she joked, "With your settlement, you could basically buy yourself an island if you wanted to and live there for the rest of your life."

Rin giggled, "Idiot." She moved up and hugged her friend, "I'll think about it."

_Running away. Maybe it would be for the best..._

* * *

><p>A week later Rin drove up to the home she used to share with Sesshomaru, her hands gripping the steering wheel as she looked up at the house. <em>It looks cold, <em>she thought, _the warmth, the charm the mansion used to exude somehow disappearing only after a month. _

"Hello Jaken," Rin bowed her head as she stepped out of her car, meeting the small man at the front doors of the house.

"Mrs. Tak-" Jaken paused, his eyes wide at his blunder, "Uh… Ms. Rin, Rin, I'm so sorry! Please excuse my behaviour, my terrible oversight," he bowed repeatedly for his error.

"Jaken," Rin touched his shoulder, smiling softly, "It's ok."

"Yes, right." Jaken hesitated, shuffling towards the entryway, "Master Sesshomaru is leaving for Seoul after work today, so you have all night to collect what you needed to."

"Ok," Rin followed him inside the mansion, her brown eyes moving over the entrance. Every trace of her had been erased, the flower pots that sat on the table in the centre of the foyer gone, the frames that lined the wall by the stairs empty. She closed her eyes, her chest twisting, _what were you expecting Rin? _She asked herself as Jaken bowed, leaving the house to herself. _For him to keep things the way they were? _

"Woof!"

Rin turned on her heel as she heard the sound of paws scampering towards her, her smile wide as she bent down. "Ah-Un!"

"Hello handsome," Rin whispered to Ah-Un as the puppy snuggled her leg, kneeling down to cuddle the small canine. "I missed you so much," she kissed the top of his head, "Has he been taking good care of you?" She asked him, running her hands through his soft fur.

Ah-Un licked her hand in response, Rin laughing at the puppy's antics.

"You're getting so big," she murmured as she stood up, "Jaken's been talking you for walks every day I hear, you're good for him, aren't you?" She asked as the puppy wriggled in her hands, signalling that he wanted down.

"Alright," she gently set him down, "I guess I'm just going to pick up some of my stuff. You're not allowed on the second floor, huh?" She told him as she began to walk up the stairs, "I'll be right back."

Her steps became slower as she moved towards the bedroom, her hand frozen on the door handle. _What will I see? _She wondered, expecting the worse. _Another woman's lingerie? _She snorted as she rested her forehead against the door, _maybe there will be even be a woman in the bed. _

She sighed as she pushed down on the handle, her eyes looking around the room. The portrait of their first dance had been taken from the fireplace, it now on the floor, resting against the wall. She cursed to herself as she picked it up and sat on the bed, her fingers tracing the brush strokes.

_Our first dance as husband and wife, _she thought as tears escaped her eyes. She remembered that moment so vividly, how happy she had been, how happy she thought _he _had been.

_All a lie. _

She bit her lip as she moved off the bed, placing the portrait resting back against the wall, unable to look at it any longer.

_You came here for your clothes, _she told herself as she stepped into the walk-in closet. She quickly packed her clothes, the items she had before _him, _leaving the expensive brand names, the purses, the jewellery, the designer shoes, and sunglasses. _Because that's not me, _she thought as she zipped up the small duffle bag, _she had always felt like an impostor wearing Chanel. _

She took a deep breath as she left the bedroom, walking down the stairs, her heart heavy. She smiled as she spotted Ah-Un waiting patiently by the bottom of the staircase.

"Ah-Un," she cooed as she dropped the bag on the bottom step.

Rin wiped her eyes as she moved to the floor, reaching out for Ah-Un as she rubbed her nose into his fur. "Ah-Un," she whispered, her throat tight, "Be good for Sesshomaru, ok? Give him lots of kisses," she laughed lightly as he licked her chin, "Take care of him. Make sure you make him laugh, ok?" She spoke, her throat tightening, "He… he always spoiled you, didn't he? Sometimes, sometimes I was jealous that he gave you a kiss first when he came home." She giggled at the memory.

"Hey," she tsked as Ah-Un bit her finger, "You're getting hungry, aren't you? It's getting late," she spoke to him as she carried him to the kitchen. "Supper time, huh?" She opened the cupboard and found the can of dog food, setting it on the counter before she set him on the floor.

"Here you are," she patted his head. "Eat up," she smiled as she set the bowl in front of the white puppy. She sat at the kitchen island as she watched him finish the food, resting her chin on her forearms as she reminisced.

She remembered all those mornings when she would make him a cup of coffee before he went off to work, all those evenings when he would come home and kiss her hello. And then that night he tried to make her soup when she had a cold, or that evening they made pizza from scratch, resulting in a burnt pie and flour covering the kitchen floor.

_Just a lie. _

She closed her eyes, _how could that all have been a lie? _She wondered, _all those laughs, those hugs, those moments when he told her about his childhood. When they talked about having kids, when she was pregnant, how could that all have been a lie? _

She stiffened as she heard door to the mansion open, the sound echoing through the empty foyer. Her gaze darted to Ah-Un who had fallen asleep next to his bowl, her hand clutching her phone as she timidly walked to the door.

"J-Jaken?" She called out his name, expecting to see the short man.

"Rin," Sesshomaru was frozen as he entered the house, his keys falling onto the marble floor, the sound echoing in the hall. _Was she real? _He asked himself, his heart clenching, his chest tight.

"Sesshomaru," Rin whispered as tears filled her gaze, _not him, _she tried to look away, tried to move, tried to run from him. _Because one more word, and she'd fall to the ground and weep. She wasn't strong enough, not now, maybe not ever, to see him again. _

"What," he took a step forward, his voice shaking. "What are you doing here?"

"Jaken," Rin's throat was dry. "He," she stuttered, nervous, tense. "He said you were leaving for Korea today."

"The flight was cancelled," he moved closer, _it's her. She's real. The woman who had been haunting him for weeks now. _

"I," she gasped as he touched her hip, his large hands delicately holding her sides. She felt goosebumps run up her arm at his touch, "I should go," she whispered, her heart twisting, her large brown eyes filled with tears.

_I can't be here, not with you. I can't be here and not want to run into your arms… _

"You should go," he repeated, ingraining the feel of her delicate form into his memory. "Rin," his forehead rested against hers now, "My Rin." His eyes closed as he felt her small hands lift to his chest, resting against his heart.

"Leave," he whispered harshly, his gaze firmly on hers now. His mind was conflicted, torn, "Leave before I can't stop myself from holding back any longer."

"I-" Rin told herself to take a step back, to run, yet her hands wrapped around his torso, her head resting against his chest. _I can't do this, _she thought as she began to cry. _I can't run from you. _"Sesshomaru," she felt overwhelmed, the emotions running through her causing her so much confusion, so much pain. "I can't stop missing you," she told him through her tears, his scent, his touch, it was all overwhelming. "I can't stop wanting to wake up next to you in the morning," she cried. "Maru," she looked up at him with those tired brown eyes, her voice wavering, "Why can't I stop loving you? I shouldn't… I should hate you."

_A man who's lied to me so many times, who's hurt me over and over. I must be a masochist, for loving you. _

He cursed, averting his gaze from hers. "Rin," he repeated, the pain in his head returning. Running through him as he tried to separate his thoughts. _Let her go, _he told himself, _you've hurt her too many times._ "Goddamnit," he pulled her tighter, closer, "You should go." It pained him to say that, and pained him to hold her so close.

_Let her go. _

"I should go," she repeated once more, her mind hazy, her thoughts a blur. _He's right here, _she thought, _the man she missed. The man she dreamed of, the man she ached to touch. _

_This is wrong, _she told herself as she moved up onto her tiptoes, his breath hitching as she moved closer to him. _He doesn't love you, never loved you, yet here you are Rin, so desperate for his touch. _

She ignored her thoughts, that voice in her head that warned her from making such a dangerous mistake, and that ache in her chest as she pressed her lips to his.

_Just once more, _she told herself as their tongues danced, as their mouths moved in sync, hungry with passion, with desperate desire.

"Maru," she whimpered as he cupped her bottom, her legs wrapping around his torso as he picked her up and pushed her back against the wall. His right hand rested against the wall as they kissed, her own arms wrapped around his broad shoulders, her hands entrapped in his silver hair.

"Fuck," he pulled his head back and looked at her, her swollen lips, her cheeks red, her long, brown hair tangled. "Rin," his heart was pounding, his breaths tight, "Tell me to stop," he pleaded, _because I can't on my own. You're so addicting, your taste, your touch…_

"I," her fingers touched his face, moving over his angled cheeks, "I don't want you to stop." _Just once more, _she told herself, _one last time, let me lose myself in you. _

"Rin," he cursed as his lips returned to hers, his hands moving down her front as he unbuttoned her dress, "Fuck, Rin…"

* * *

><p>Rin woke first in the morning, her heart clenching as she looked at him. Her hand moved to the left, reaching forward to brush those stray silver hairs from his face. <em>The last time, <em>she told herself, _waking up next to him. _

She bit her lips as her eyes watered. "Sesshomaru," she whispered, "You should have stopped me the first time I told you that I loved you. Before I fell so hard for you. So desperately in love with you. Foolish of me, huh?" She felt the corners of her lips move up at all the memories, "It was like a fairytale, being with you. It was just like I imagined, having someone next to me for the rest of my life. Forgetting to be scared of love, to be hurt and left alone. I should thank you then, for letting me have something so perfect, even if it was only for a moment. Even if it didn't last a lifetime…" Her voice wavered, "Even if in the end, I'm alone."

She hung her head, "I…" She exhaled sharply. "I was supposed to have a happily ever after. I was supposed to have a prince charming and have eight kids and be so happy. But now," she wiped her eyes, "Now I don't know. Now, now I think I'm going to leave." She whispered now, almost unable to continue. "I… I'm taking that offer your mother gave me and leaving for New York. Because here," she glanced at him, "In Tokyo, there's you. The man I loved so desperately once upon a time, the man I woke up next to and kissed goodnight. I can't be here, in Japan, and try to forget you." She looked at her left hand, her ring finger bare, "I've spoken to Miroku. To everyone I suppose, but you." She took a deep breath, "I'm disappearing." Her smile was bitter, "Your first wife dying from a brain aneurism. It's like a stupid soap opera," she jested, glancing at the balcony doors. "That way, it's best for everyone. I can live on the other side of the world and you can live here, without your plans going awry because of me."

_With a new wife, _she thought, _a new woman to wake up next to in the mornings. _

She slipped off the bed, picking up her dress from the floor. _Will you kiss her goodnight, like you did for me? Will you laugh with her and hold her when she's upset? Will you whisper silly thoughts into her ear and hold her hand just because you want to? And when you tell her that you love her, will it be a lie too? _

She dressed slowly, walking to his side of the bed. _I don't think I'll ever forget you, _she thought as she pressed her lips against his forehead, "Goodbye, Sesshomaru." She whispered, teary-eyed as she took a step back.

_So this was it, _she thought as she slipped out of the bedroom, quietly walking out of the home with the duffle bag in her hand. She looked back at the house, admiring how beautiful it was, _clean lines, contemporary design, and cold… just like him. _

She smiled bitterly, _I'll miss you… _

* * *

><p>Sesshomaru struggled to keep his composure as he read the medical report. His jaw was tense, his mouth curled into a scowl.<p>

Miroku cleared his throat as Sesshomaru threw it onto the desk, his amber gaze ablaze with anger. "It's dated for the fourteenth," the younger man started, "three days from today. As you can see, the neurosurgeon from Tokyo General has agreed to write off on it. She's to pass from a brain aneurism contracted from the car accident. She passes peacefully in her sleep."

Sesshomaru averted his gaze away to the table, "Was this your idea?" He snarled, "For her to… die?"

Miroku shook her head, sighing, "She wanted to disappear. I just came up with the documents."

Inutaisho's visage was stone as he regarded his son. He folded his hands, "It's for the best," he said finally, "This way, they can both move on with their lives."

Sesshomaru snorted at his father's words, glaring at the papers. Move_ on, _he thought, _from her? _

"Sesshomaru?" Miroku called his name, pulling him from his thoughts, "What do you think?"

"Fine," Sesshomaru waved his hand, his mind agitated further after this matter. "It's fine." He pushed himself out of his seat, "Excuse me," he bowed his head before he left, taking the elevator to the rooftop of the building.

He closed his eyes after he walked out towards the iron railings, gripping the metal tight with his fists. "You're disappearing," he murmured bitterly, "I shouldn't be selfish, wishing you'd stay." He took out his wallet from his pocket and sighed. His fingers almost trembling as he opened the leather and pulled out a ring, _her ring. _

_It was only last night when he had her in his arms_, he thought as he leaned against the railing. Only last night when she had whispered in her ear that she loved him, that she missed him. It was only last night when she had cried in his embrace, and only last night when he whispered those three words in return to her.

_I love you. _

It had taken him too long, he mused, to tell her that. Too long to realize how he felt for her, _his wife. The almost mother to his son. _"I'm sorry," he murmured as he squeezed the ring in his fist, "For hurting you." _For lying, for using you. Someone so pure, so innocent, for selfish gains. _

"Fuck," he cursed as he felt a tear run down his cheek, "Why am I crying over you?" He asked himself with a bitter laugh, wiping his eyes, "Fuck."

He pushed his hands off the railing, "Enough." Sesshomaru pinched his nose, "Enough with the this pathetic charade," he hissed to himself. He was the CEO of a multi-million dollar company, yet here he was, an emotional wreck. Mourning her, missing her, while the other part of him fought for his return to his former self. The man who would never have cried over a woman. The man who's arrogance and calculative image had thrusted him to the top. He was torn inside, his rational part decidedly taking over.

_He was letting her go. For kami's sake, she was disappearing from the face of the world. He had to move on. He had responsibilities, countless people depending on him to succeed._

"I'm Sesshomaru Takahashi." He murmured, "CEO of YK Takahashi." _This was who he was, _he decided._ He was done playing the dedicated, doting husband. He could stop with the facade, the lies… _

_Because before the accident, it was all a lie, wasn't it? _

He put the ring back into his wallet, "Sesshomaru Takahashi," he repeated once more, "CEO of YK Takahashi." He ignored the twist in his chest, that ache in his heart. "Soon to be widow," he added quietly, walking back into the building.

* * *

><p>xoxo<p>

tuille


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